Types of Girlfriends

June 25, 2007 at 8:48 pm (Quizzes and Trivia)

 Types of Girlfriends

1) Ms. Nice Gal – “Tickets to the boxing match? Oh Darling, you shouldn’t have”

Also known as: What a gal, precious, one of the boys, my main squeeze, doormat

Advantages: Cheerful, agreeable, kindly

: May wise up someday

Old Yeller
– “You god-damned spineless good-for-nothing drag-ass no-talent son of a bit*#! Can’t you see you’re making me miserable??”

Also known as: She-Devil, Sourpuss, the Nag, My Old Lady, Warthog from Hell

Advantages: Pays attention to you

: Screeches, throws frying pans

3) Sickly – “Oh, my head. My head. My feet. My cramps. My cellulite”

Also known as: Whiner, Mewler, Glumpy

Advantages: Predictable

Disadvantages: Contagious

4) The Bosser
– “Stand up straight. Put on a different tie. Get a haircut. Change your job. Make some money. Don’t give me that look.”

Also known as: Whipcracker, The Sarge, Ms. Know-it-all, Ball and Chain, yes Mom

Advantages: Often right

Disadvantages: Often right, but so what?

5) Ms. Vaguely Dissatisfied – “I just can’t decide. Should I switch my career, goals, home, and hair color?”

Also known as
: The Fretter, Worrywart, Typical, Aw c’mon Honey

: Easily soothed

: Even more easily perturbed

6) Wild Woman out of Control – “I’ve got an idea. Lez get drunk an’ make love onna front lawn. I done it before. S’fun.”

Also known as: Fast girl, freewheeler, goodtime charleena, passed out

Advantages: More fun than a barrel of monkeys

Disadvantages: Unreliable; drives off cliffs

7) Huffy – “I see nothing humorous in those silly cartoons you keep snickering at”

Also known as: No fun, humorless prig, Cold fish, Chilly proposition, iceberg, Snarly

Advantages: Your friends will feel sorry for you

Disadvantages: You will have no friends

8) Woman from Mars – “I believe this interpretive dance will explain how I feel about our relationship”

Also known as: The Babbler, Spooky Girl, Screwball, Loony, Bad News, Artistic

Advantages: Entertaining, unfathomable

Disadvantages: Will read her poetry aloud

9) Ms. Dreamgirl – “I am utterly content with you just the way you are, my handsome genius of a boyfriend. I think we must make love like crazed weasels now”

Also known as: Ms. Right, Goddess, Knockout, Perfection, Gorgeous

aAdvantagesAdvantages: Funny, intelligent uninhibited

Disadvantages: Will have nothing to do with you.

DraculVanHelsing said:
Amit, after reading this, I now know why I’m still single. It’s because the dream girl will have nothing to do with me.

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