Ghost of Josef Stalin On Social Networking Sites

August 24, 2011 at 8:09 pm (Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Michelangelo the genetically engineered Psychic Lobster was again feeling bored in his solo lobster tank in the Set Laboratories Lab outside London.

He decided he’d once again kill time through his genetically engineered ability to enter people’s dreams.

First he’d see if Renfield was asleep and dreaming.

He entered the mind of Renfield who was currently asleep and dreaming in a motel room in the U.S. state of Virginia.

Renfield was dreaming that he was in the drive-through lane at a McDonald’s restaurant.

Speaking into the drive-through intercom, Renfield said, “Lapar amai pour sex.”

He was showing off his skills at being able to speak 3 languages- Iban, French and English simultaneously.

Michelangelo shook his lobster head (and thus his antennae as well).

Renfield would always be Renfield.

Michelangelo decided he would then enter the dreams of Piers Morgan the host of CNN”s news talk show Piers Morgan Tonight.

Piers Morgan was dreaming that he was talking to the ghost of late Soviet dictator Josef Stalin on his show.

Complained Stalin’s ghost, “You know as I look around at the world today, I’ve always regretted the fact that both myself and my state the U.S.S.R. kicked the bucket before the advent of Internet social networking sites.
I mean one of the drawbacks of being in control of a police state in my day was that you had to spend so much money on having a vast secret police service to spy and find out what your people were saying, doing and thinking.
These days thanks to sites like Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr, people automatically post for the entire world to see what they’re saying, doing and thinking.
It would have made running a totalitarian state so much easier had these sites been around when I was busy dictating.”

To be continued.

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