Michelangelo’s Dream of Donald Trump

July 19, 2015 at 7:42 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Michelangelo’s Dream of Donald Trump

As Amadeus Emanon and Renfield R. Renfield watched the program Game of Thrones on the TV set in the office of the Set Enterprises lab, Michelangelo the genetically created psychic lobster was sleeping with his eyes wide open (like he always did) in the laboratory’s large salt water tank aquarium.

He was dreaming (having a nightmare actually) of a world where Donald Trump was President of the United States.

In the dream, North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un had sent an elite commando unit of North Korean micro-mini skirted women soldiers to capture U.S. President Donald Trump and hold him as a prisoner of war.

Kim wanted the Presidential access code for America’s nuclear missiles so he could use America’s own weapons against her in destroying her cities.

After 15 minutes of torture from the elite North Korean female commando unit and President Trump’s inability to know either the words or the tune to the North Korean National Anthem, the Donald was soon singing (soprano) like a (high-pitched) canary.

The missiles were then launched and numerous American cities and states were destroyed.

The North Korean women soldiers forced President Trump to watch the whole spectacle on television.

A reality TV cooking show where a celebrity chef was giving his recipe for Baked Alaska was interrupted by visual images of Sarah Palin’s home vanishing in the puff of smoke of a huge atomic mushroom cloud.

Once America was destroyed, Kim Jong-un had no further use for Prisoner of War No. 00000-00 and ordered him terminated.

After a last meal of Mexican enchiladas which went over like a lead balloon with the Donald, Trump was then taken out to the prison courtyard where the micro-mini skirted North Korean women soldiers were lined-up with their rifles and bayonets.

The slit skirted red dragon emblazoned gold evening dress leader of the commando unit then dropped her sword giving the signal to fire and said in perfect English, “You’re fired.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday July 19th


  1. Sherrie de Valeria said,

    Wah hahaha … What the … I do not want Trump to be the next President. He is much a racist himself and a dumb man. He may have been one of the greatest, smartest and richest businessman in the world, but he is still a dumb ass in some way. If anyone go into politics, there is a where you are tested to the very core of your own intelligence to hear how you endure the trials of the world given to you and hoping that you would not or NEVER reveal yourself as an ASS-HOLE.

    LOL I was laughing at what had happened at Sarah Palin’s house. In Malaysia, she was called as the Mother of all Whore. That was hardcore enough for a title. Even the rapper Eminem have a duplicate doppelganger in his video. wah ahahaha …

    The last line that Trump has been fired is funny! What a nightmare Michelangelo – he should paint a new version of Dante’s hell after that nightmare, for real. lol 😛

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      LOL !

      That would be funny seeing Michelangelo painting a picture with his lobster claws of Dante’s Hell- Donald Trump roasting alongside some Mexican enchiladas over an open grill while Sarah Palin has the name Mystery Babylon Mother of All Harlots stamped on her forehead.

      Sarah Palin certainly had a daughter who was getting knocked up all the time by different fathers.

      And Donald Trump has certainly revealed himself to be an ASS-HOLE in this U.S. Presidential race.

      If Kim Kardashian ever glued one of Caitlyn Jennner’s wigs to her booty, Donald Trump could easily mistake it for his own reflection in the mirror.

  2. Sherrie de Valeria said,

    Wah hahahaha … Oh gosh! You and your humor! Love it.

    I bet Donald Trump would have a good view of his wig on her smooth booty. He would say …, “Oh my! Do I look so good on your ass, Kim? I can see my reflection on it very clearly. I can see my face all over it – fitting both of the buns!” wah hahahaha …

    And Kim Kardashians would replied, “And I can see my reflection greatly on your wide forehead crowned with your so expensice Spider Monkey’s toupee. Oh, how much does it cost, Donald? I would want it on my booty as my next Caityln’s fashion move. Sexy!”

    And then come Paris and said, “Oh, yes! That is hot! So hot” LOL

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      LOL !

      And the lights would go out all over Paris and the wigs would go on all over Kim’s booty and Donald’s fingers would be all over his head as he screams, “Good God! I’m bald.”

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      Barney Rubble: Um, Fred…

      Fred Flintstone: What is it, Barney?

      Barney: Somebody stole the hair off the Water Buffalo’s head in the Loyal Order of Water Buffalo Lodge.

      Fred: My God, Barney, that’s awful.

      Barney: It is, Fred. I wonder where it could have got to.

      Fred (pointing at the TV): There it is, Barney. On Donald Trumpstone’s head.

      Barney: You’re right, Fred. It looks like some other type of hair has been glued on as well. I wonder where that came from?

      (Suddenly on TV a group of bald headed brown spiders in a rock band take to the stage and start playing their musical instruments)

      Bald-Headed Brown Spiders (singing):

      Hey, hey, we’re the Monkees
      people say we monkey around
      but we’re too busy singing
      to put anybody down
      say did anybody see our hair
      in New York City downtown?

      (As video is shown of Donald Trumpstone’s hair being blown away in a nasty Manhattan downdraft caused by a combination of high winds and skyscrapers, a Kraken suddenly emerges from Davey Jones’ locker backstage)…

  3. Sherrie de Valeria said,

    Wah hahahaha … What a story, right? That is like eeeewwww … as if like … what the hell … LOL

    Kim Kardashian : Oh, my goodness! What animal is that on your hair? I did not know you have such a … well, new fur coat? Is that a coat? But you don’t wear fur coat on the head, right, Mr Trump?

    hahaha … And then Donald Trump would say to Kim, “You’re fired!”


    • draculvanhelsing said,

      LOL !

      That’s exactly what he’d say.

      Donald Trump seems to be the only one on the planet who doesn’t know that everyone on the planet knows he’s wearing a wig.

      Do you know why Donald Trump wears a wig/toupee?

      Because if he didn’t, everyone would know how much he resembles Lex Luthor the villain in the Superman comics. 😛

      • Sherrie de Valeria said,

        hahahaha … But Lex Luthor got no wig, right? The last Superman I did watched was with Dean Cain and Teri Hatcher. Then there is this one called as “Smallville” but not my kind of Superman I would watch.

        The one that always makes me sad watching it was Superman with Christopher Reeve because I grow up watching him and then suddenly that terrible accident that took away more than half of his life …. So sad.

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      No, Lex Luthor did not wear a wig.

      Superman is my favourite comic book super hero. 🙂

      I watched both Lois and Clark with Dean Cain and Teri Hatcher and also the later series about Clark Kent as a teen boy and young man called Smallville.

      In Lois and Clark, that Lex Luthor was not bald (save for one season when he did shave his head).

      In fact, Lois and Clark’s Lex Luthor looked a lot like actor Warren Beatty.

      My favourite Lex Luthor of all was Michael Rosenbaum who played Lex Luthor on Smallville.

      His Lex Luthor was such an amazingly complex character.

      In fact the latest poem you wrote called Falsehood fit Michael Rosenbaum’s depiction of Lex Luthor to a tee.

      He was an exceedingly complex character.

      Neither totally evil nor totally good.

      Towards the end of the series, Lex’s evil side started to totally win out and he became the Lex Luthor we’re familiar with today- one totally evil.

      My favourite TV Superman was Dean Cain.

      My favourite movie Superman was of course Christopher Reeve.

      I was so shocked and devastated when I heard the news that he had been paralyzed in a horsing accident.

      Not only because we share the same name- Christopher- but also because the only 3 times in my life I’ve been on a horse, I was thrown from that horse.

      So when Christopher Reeve was paralyzed, I took it as a sign that I’m not meant to ride a horse.

      I hope if some woman ever does fall in love with me and wants me to be her knight in shining armour, she won’t mind if the only horse I ride is a horse on a Merry-Go-Round carousel.

      • Sherrie de Valeria said,

        I do ride a horse from time to time because my mother-in-law has a horse farm. So the advantage of this is that my kids has no need to pay any fee like the others and they can roam about freely at grandma’s place.

        I have never been thrown down by a horse and we have a small-sized horse back in Malaysia that is the same height as a pony.

        But since I live in Germany, the first time I really encounter a horse at my mum-in-law’s place, I was like … “Holy sh ….” It is way too big, too tall and its height look too scary for me. Even to climb up for me is challenge. Not sure how many times I did try to mount the creature, it moves away and I fell on my butt too often! I remembered my husband and his mom was giggling behind me.

        Speaking on Lex Luthor, indeed, you are right about him in Smallville. I noticed of him as a good boy in the first place who has the struggle in relation with his father. And we thought his father is the worse, but no, Lex Luthor was the worse type.

        I was kind of shock even when he got married to Lana Lang. When I saw her the first time I was like astound at how so very beautiful she is and her eyes are mesmerizing. I am a woman and yet I admire other women’s beauty. But not all women are that beautiful.

        I am sure you might find its odd if I say, for example, that Gisele Bundchen is not beautiful, and I find its hard to like Kate Moss or Claudia Schiffer. I am odd, really. LOL

        Not long after that, I find a new young actress who is a Bulgarian, Nina Dobrev, who plays two characters in Vampire Diaries as the beautiful Elena Gilbert or as the evil vampiress Katherine. I was like, why is that these people are too beautiful?

        And I am an ugly one! LOL

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      I happen to think you’re very beautiful, Sherrie, judging from your photos.

      And you’re right, Kristin Kreuk who plays Lana Lang is very beautiful.

      She’s originally from Vancouver and visits here again from time to time.

      She was once sitting across from me in a Vietnamese restaurant I was in.

      • Sherrie de Valeria said,

        Really? Oh, my goodness! She must’ve looking so beautiful in real life, I guess.
        I saw Nicole Kidman once in Frankfurt – but people did not even recognize her. That was odd.

        But they certainly do recognise Tom Cruise when he did the movie on “Valkyrie”. “Oh, that small man!” the Germans would say. LOL 😛

      • draculvanhelsing said,

        LOL !

        I once got in Sylvester Stallone’s way when I was a kid at a opening of a Planet Hollywood restaurant in London, England.

        My dad and I were walking along this street and there was a huge line-up and my dad and I were wanting to cross to the other side of the line.

        So my dad asked this one man, “What’s this line-up for?”.

        “We’re all waiting for…”

        And this stupid Englishman for the life of him couldn’t pronounce Sylvester Stallone’s name.

        Stallone might as well have been a Bulgarian Transylvanian Siberian Eskimo the way this guy was pronouncing his name.

        So I said to my dad, “I’m not waiting for any idiot I’ve never heard of before.”

        So I walked to the other side in front of someone who was just walking up the red carpet.

        I heard this “Harrumph!” and I looked up and saw a pissed-off Sylvester Stallone.

        I don’t know if he was angry that I walked in front of him or if he was angry that he was one idiot that at least one person in the world had never heard of before.

  4. Sherrie de Valeria said,

    Wah hahahaha … That what had happened to Angelina Jolie when she was in France. My cousin told me that her mother in law came right up asking Angelina’s body guard to help her with her shopping bags into the bus. The mom-in-law is nearly 70 and she has no TV. But she got thousands of books in her house in every room – the only world she knows. According to my cousin, she did told her mom-in-law that is the body guard of the famouse Angelina Jolie and Angie saw this, of couse, she was with her daughter Shiloh at that time. Then the mother in law said, “So what? She still can tell him to help an old like me up the bus?!!!” LOL hahahaha … I cried crazily all over the phone when she told me that story. My cousin was so embarassed and apologized. But the least she got a selfie with Angie! 😀

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