All You Can Eat Buffet

November 6, 2015 at 8:28 pm (Horror, Mystery/horror, Short Story) (, , )

All You Can Eat Buffet

Ben noticed the huge line-up ahead on the sidewalk as he walked down the street.

“Is there a big concert or something?” Ben asked the last person in line as he walked by.

“No, this line-up is for a new all you can eat buffet,” the man answered.

“Really?” Ben was surprised, “They must have really really good food if there’s this long a line up for it.”

“There’s a special promotional offer for today,” the last man in line explained, “they’ll pay you $20 if you can handle the all you can eat buffet according to this promotional pamphlet flyer here.”

“What?” Ben was incredulous, “you can eat all you want and then they’ll pay you $20 at the end?”.

“That’s right,” the last man in line nodded.

“Well, I might as well join in,” Ben got behind the man.

The line seemed to be moving pretty quickly and before Ben knew it, he was the first person in line before the door that said All You Can Eat Buffet.

The door opened and Ben walked in.

The door immediately closed behind him.

“So,” Ben asked the maitre’d at the door, “how do you expect to make a profit if you give people an all you can eat buffet and then you pay them at the end?”.

“You only get the money if you can survive handling the buffet,” the maitre’d explained, “and besides the all you can eat buffet isn’t for you… it’s for… him.”

The maitre’d pushed Ben into a room which had a huge pit on the floor with a sign beside it that said Glemp the Giant Cannibal.

The giant’s hands emerged from the pit and grabbed Ben.

Before Ben knew it, he was in the giant’s mouth where he was crunched and munched to pieces by Glemp’s huge teeth.

Ben did not get his $20.

-A short story
written by Christopher
Friday November 6th



  1. ֆɦɛʀʀɨɛ ɖɛ ʋǟʟɛʀɨǟ said,

    Oh dear my …. Poor Ben! I thought it was Donald Trump’s hand! LOL

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, if it was Dr. Ben Carson who had been in the buffet line-up, it might have been Donald Trump’s hand. 😀

      No doubt, Trump is ticked off about being No. 2 behind Dr. Carson’s No. 1 in Republican Presidential polls.

      Trump no doubt hates being No. 2 at anything even though he’s in fact No. 2 all the time. 😀

      • ֆɦɛʀʀɨɛ ɖɛ ʋǟʟɛʀɨǟ said,

        He is not a good loser. Even Warren Buffet or Bill Gates sometimes dropped down to number 2. But still, they are millionaire and the richer Buffet gets the more he is sympathetic and kinder.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, sadly that isn’t true of Trump.

        He becomes more and more of an asshole with each passing day.

        One would think he had a toupee made of orange spider monkey hairs or something.

        Oh wait! He does! 😀

      • ֆɦɛʀʀɨɛ ɖɛ ʋǟʟɛʀɨǟ said,

        Maybe that toupee of hell poisoned his head. Anyway, even if it is bio-hair still it is not meant for a human being. I bet the the monkey has more style than him. LOL

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, monkey hair looks better on monkeys than Trump.

        And all that monkey hair growing in his head has made bananas of his brains. 😀

      • ֆɦɛʀʀɨɛ ɖɛ ʋǟʟɛʀɨǟ said,

        Bananas of his brains??? hahaha … Yes, he is. And he got whole of other bananas in products as well – with his California dream of Kim Kardashian’s bootie on his face! LOL

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        LOL ! 😀

  2. anaatcalin said,

    I loove the way you write. It’s so incredibly good, and I only say this about Hyperion and another girl writer, friend of mine. But poor Ben… What happened to him is painful, especially since you made him feel so much like a human to the reader. I see great parallels to the real world through the symbolism.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thank you so much, Ana. 🙂

      Yes, I suppose there are parallels to the real world symbolically speaking.

      Some people do end up being eaten by giant hands metaphorically speaking.

      They are promised something and what they are promised ends up devouring them in the end.

      • anaatcalin said,

        Wonderful parallels spring from your mind and fingertips because you’re cultivated and have true beliefs. I can feel the natural flow of it, your mind seems to be at work all the time. There’s honesty and energy behind what you write. In this piece I can especially see the parallels to our modern day economy – you get your salary if you can survive the employer’s inhuman demands and working schedule; with it, you might just have to pay your hospital bill. Maybe it’s just my own free associations and your piece has little to do with it, but it’s what it tells me.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, that’s true, Ana. 🙂

        My mind is at work all the time.

        That’s why Sherlock Holmes is another one of my favourite characters.

        Because his mind was constantly at work all the time.

        Whenever I read one of Doyle’s original stories or watch a film or television adaptation about Holmes, I always relate to his character.

        The constant drive for mental stimulation he has- I always relate to.

      • anaatcalin said,

        This drive comes through naturally in your writing. I’ve made a personal pleasure out of reading one of your pieces a day, and one of Hyperion’s, at least. Good reads is what keeps me going during the day, relieves the stress and reminds me there are people such as you out there, not only the financial jackals I work with through my profession – left the life of a school language teacher for the jungle of business administration, negociations and hardcore legal translations. It’s rewarding, and one may enjoy the battle, but sometimes I can’t believe the extremely low intellectual level of the riches and most powerful people. It makes me angry, and that’s why you and Hyperion are such blessings!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Glad that Daniel and I have been such blessings to many people. 🙂

        Have you ever read any of my friend Sherrie’s work?

        She too has a great and wonderful mind and is a wonderful and profound writer.

  3. Nicholas C. Rossis said,

    Awesome short! Loved it 🙂

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks, Nicholas. 🙂

      A friend of mine, Sherrie, talked about eating oneself into a food coma in her comments in one of her blog posts and the thought entered my mind, Yes, like at an all you can eat buffet.

      And then the thought entered my mind about people lining up for an all you can eat buffet and who would end up being eaten but them.

      And I thought, that would be the sort of story Roald Dahl would write.

      And then I thought, well he isn’t around to write it so perhaps I better.

  4. doesitevenmatter3 said,

    HA! I love this! 😛 And the ending is perfect! 🙂
    Reminds me of something Stephen King might write!
    HUGS!!! 🙂

  5. Hyperion said,

    Excellent parable, Chris! Our consumerism has a way of consuming us. We could read Plato and contemplate Aristotle but instead we watch Kim K’s enormous bootie and think of doing less philosophical things. 😀

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