Fox and Scully: An X-Files Christmas

December 24, 2015 at 8:01 pm (International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, TV Shows, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Fox and Scully: An X-Files Christmas

Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing was dreaming.

And in his dream were FBI agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully of the X-Files.

Mulder: Do you believe in the existence of demons, Scully?

Scully (looking at him) : Define demons, Mulder.

Mulder (laughs) : Ever the sceptic eh, Scully. Well I’m not talking about the inner demons that psychologists and psychiatrists talk about. Nor addictions be it drugs, alcohol, sex.

Scully: Sex addiction eh? (laughs) That’s what you are, Mulder. A sex addict.

Mulder: Sex addict? You really think I’m a sex addict, Scully?

Scully (raises her skirt and crosses her legs) : A sex addict who isn’t getting any sex. That makes you the most dangerous kind. A person who then has the ability to sense the Supernatural when it brushes in on the material plane of existence.

Mulder: I’d love to discuss this fascinating theory of yours sometime, Scully.

Scully: Sure, Mulder. Then I’ll sleep with you. And the end result will be you’ll just become a regular normal run-of-the-mill FBI agent. The X-Files will be shut down. And supernatural entities will then have free reign all over planet Earth to bring about their plans of chaos and disorder.

Mulder: Which brings me back to my original question, Scully. Do you believe in the existence of demons? Demons hereby being defined as usually unseen supernatural entities with the ability to occasionally penetrate this material plane of existence- entities that were once angels- but who fell either as a result of joining a chap called Lucifer in rebellion to overthrow God or angels who fell as a result of a desire or inclination to sleep with mortal women which they did- thereby resulting in their fall.

Scully (laughing) : A desire or inclination to sleep with mortal women? There’s your sex addiction coming through again, Mulder.

Mulder: If you’re going to carry on like this, Scully, maybe we should just go into the bedroom for a quickie right now and get this whole X-Files business over with once and for all.

Scully (laughing) : I’m sorry, Mulder. I do find it fascinating though that you have separated the two events.

Mulder: Two events?

Scully (smiling) : Of how angels became demons. First there were angels who joined Lucifer in rebellion against God. They fell and became demons. Then there were angels who lusted after mortal women – they gave in to this inclination and thus fell and became demons. So there were two sets of demons- angels who were originally revolutionaries and then angels who became horny and then literally became horny (along with pitchfork and tails) afterwards.

Mulder: Well according to the 1st Book of Enoch which is the long expanded non-Reader’s Digest non-condensed narrative of the events described in Genesis Chapter 6, God had set those angels as Watchers over the Earth to watch over humanity. Why would God choose demons as Watchers? If you read the narrative carefully, those Watchers were originally good angels who fell as a result of giving in to their desire to sleep with mortal women.

Scully: All right, Mulder.

Mulder: I was told that in Eastern Orthodox Church tradition angels had up until the 1st Coming of Christ to decide whether they were for or against God. Once Christ arrived the 1st time in incarnate form as a babe in Bethlehem, the choices angels had made up until that point in time decided their eternal fate. Michael, Gabriel and Raphael had consistently chosen for God so their eternal fate as good angels was finally sealed at Christ’s 1st Coming. Just like for humans, the choice is open up until the moment of their death or until the 2nd Coming of Christ (whatever happens first in the respective lives of humans) to decide to be for or against God.

Scully (smiling) : This is fascinating, Mulder. You should have become a priest.

Mulder: I’d have problems with celibacy, Scully, for reasons you deduced earlier in our conversation.

Scully (smiles) : Are you saying that I’m right, Mulder?

Mulder: You’re always right, Scully.

Scully (crossing and uncrossing her legs several times) : True compliments have their rewards, Mulder.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday December 23rd


  1. Sabiscuit said,

    This was sick. I bet Mulder was talking in auto function. Does he even believe any of that stuff?

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      I don’t know whether the character of Fox Mulder believed in demons or not. He believed in the existence of ETs and certainly investigated a lot of cases in the paranormal and supernatural line.

      • Sabiscuit said,

        Your story reminded me that I hadn’t seen the revival film in the series as yet. I will try to watch it later (with my eyes closed).

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        When I wrote this story, I had no idea that they were going to do a new X-Files series in January.

        I noticed an ad for it on TV last night after I wrote this.

        I have no idea how my writing is going to turn out when I start writing.

        Originally I was going to bring in an entity called Abraxas into the story- an entity mentioned in some of Carl Jung’s writings (if you think Fox Mulder has weird ideas- you should read some of Jung’s- all the more frightening since Jung is considered a giant in modern psychiatry) but then I decided to end the chapter where I did.

        As for the Watchers in the Book of Genesis, certain of the Church Fathers believed they were angels.

        The New Testament Epistle of Jude directly quotes the 1st Book of Enoch about angels who kept not their first estate but left their habitation.

        It’s frightening to think that angels might have had sex with mortals.

        But that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

        I personally think that our world is getting more and more deranged – like the world was in Noah’s Day.

        As Christ said in His Olivet discourse, “As it was in the days of Noah, so shall it be at the coming of the Son of Man.”

      • Sabiscuit said,

        Dracul, this was very interesting. I am going to be looking back through all of the references you’ve made here. I am not familiar with Jung’s esoteric leanings but this should lead to some interesting new finds.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, I was going to write my Master’s degree Thesis in Philosophy on Jung’s idea of the Collective Unconscious but then the Faculty of Grad Studies went and misplaced my Letters of Recommendation to get a teaching assistantship and didn’t notify me of their blunder until past the deadline and so I couldn’t afford to go into Grad Studies that year.

        My life took another turn after that but I continued to read up and study Jung and others on my own after that.

        It was only in the last 15 years that I discovered Jung had these rather strange esoteric leanings.

      • Sabiscuit said,

        That combination is certainly worthy of a doctoral thesis. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your work.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Thanks very much. πŸ™‚

  2. doesitevenmatter3 said,

    Excellent, timely write!
    Ooh, and I like Fox! Oh, and that David Duchovny and his issues!
    HUGS!!! πŸ™‚

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks very much, Carolyn. πŸ™‚

      Truth be told, I always felt myself to be a lot like Fox Mulder.

      I’m hoping that sometime soon, my Dana Scully will be dropping into my life.

      Here’s, hoping anyway.

  3. Hyperion said,

    I think it’s perfectly natural for Fox to have his sex addiction with Scully as nymph to his satyr. They make an interesting couple and their discussions are a form of cerebral foreplay they both enjoy.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,


      I think that’s primarily the reason why I enjoyed watching the X-Files was because of the dialogue between Mulder and Scully.

      That one season where Scully was absent, I didn’t bother watching. I didn’t find it interesting.

      I was always trying to think of a word or words which described the dialogue between Mulder and Scully and I think you hit upon it- “cerebral foreplay”.

      That’s probably why I found their dialogue so riveting and enjoyed it so much. πŸ˜€

      • Hyperion said,

        It was a delightful threesome, no doubt. Scully, Fox, and the viewer locked in mindful intercourse until the music played. Later, no guilt or strange rashes. Just that haunting music.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, that probably explains why that melody was so predominantly haunting.

      • Hyperion said,

        Bwaa haa haa! πŸ˜€

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Instead of Dudley Moore and Bo Derek doing it to Ravel’s Bolero, you can have Peter and Mariah doing it to the theme music from The X-Files.

        And the anti-climax of the evening will come with Jefferey the Otter doing Variations From Brahms’ and Monty Python’s Hungarian Lumberjack Rhapsody. πŸ˜€

      • Hyperion said,

        Smashingly brilliant Chris! I like it!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,


      • Hyperion said,


      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Thanks very much, Daniel. πŸ™‚

      • Hyperion said,

        Very good story, Chris. It seems you can cover any subject and make it entertaining. πŸ˜€

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Glad to hear it. πŸ˜€

  4. ѕнєяяιє βˆ‚Ρ” ναℓєяια said,

    I should watch that Serie again. Been missing the classic series like X-Files.
    That show did freaked me out a few times because it is really scary in some part of the story, how the power of wealth and politicians weaved into the government and done all the impossible conspiracy theory which influenced the whole world’s economy.

    And now, the down fall of the world’s finance yesterday was the worse in history. I bet the world is going down somehow – painfully and slowly …

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, I miss The X-Files.

      They’re going to have a new X-Files special on TV here in mid-January.

      So Scully and Mulder will be back together again briefly. πŸ™‚

      • ѕнєяяιє βˆ‚Ρ” ναℓєяια said,

        Really? Never heard of it. I’ve never watch anything these days and so I am not up-to-date with anything. Now I do feel like someone just gone out of the cave! LOL

        Hope their new Serie is as cool as it was before. Nowadays it is most difficult to make any good interesting series as every series copied from each other. Even monsters and alien looked the same!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, that’s true. They all look the same.

        Soon every candidate running for U.S. President will start wearing a red spider fur toupee.

        I can see Hillary wearing one now. πŸ˜›

      • ѕнєяяιє βˆ‚Ρ” ναℓєяια said,

        LOL Eeeeewww … no way!

        Do you think that the US will recover if Hillary became the President? What do you think of this?

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I don’t think the U.S will recover if any of the current candidates become President.

        Sadly, America is a society pretty bereft of true leadership these days.

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