A Day In The Life of Set Enterprises Employees

April 22, 2016 at 7:28 pm (Commentary, Culture, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

A Day In The Life of Set Enterprises Employees

Down in the Set Enterprises lab, Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was in his aquarium where he was receiving a radio transmission from the future on his lobster antennae…

BBC World News Bulletin From The Future: And this news story from the world of Entertainment, film maker Martin Scorsese is teaming up with the creators of Monty Python to make a sequel to the film Life of Brian which will be called The Last Temptation of Brian…

. . .

Renfield R. Renfield was in the office of a powerful and highly influential British subject who was hiring him to locate and track down those responsible for leaking the Panama Papers and to bump them off.

. . .

Amadeus Emanon had been hired as a pianist to play at a birthday party for Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II on her 90th Birthday.

As one of the valets at the Royal birthday party wondered where the huge plate of raspberry jellied doughnuts had gone, he never thought of looking on top of the piano where they were located as Amadeus played and sang the lyrics of Prince’s song, “She wore raspberry beret…”

. . .

Dr. Cadbury Rocher was giving a guest speech on The Importance of Science In Education to a conference of teachers in Philadelphia, U.S.A.

Dr. Rocher: Back in the 1950s, traditional educators were warning that if “John Dewey’s ideas of so-called Progressive education were implemented into American classrooms on a massive scale, this would result in the dumbing down of America on a massive scale.”

(Dr. Cadbury Rocher took off his glasses and wiped them)

Dr. Rocher: Whether the traditional educators of the 1950s were right or whether John Dewey and his progressive ideas were right, we can tell by observing the world around us today.

Dr. Cadbury Rocher looked around the auditorium as 90% of the audience were on their smart phones text messaging about their most recent bowel movements or menstrual periods or sharing nude photos of themselves or sharing photos of cats or weighing in on the latest new hot topic in social networking which was, “Is it cruel and insensitive to take one’s goldfish into the bathtub with you when you’re having a bath?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 21st
2016.

30 Comments

  1. anaatcalin said,

    Fabulously written and hilarious in a meaningful way, as always, dear Chris. By now I know the characters very well, and I understand their relationships. You imagine my delight when I saw the chapter start with my great crush, Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster πŸ™‚ Looking forward to more of it.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks, Ana.

      And I’ll be just as surprised as you are when I see what my characters are doing next. πŸ™‚

      Several writers (usually the best ones) say that their characters take over their writing as they write.

      And that’s definitely true for me.

      I have no idea what Renfield or Dr. Cadbury Rocher or Amadeus or Michelangelo are going to do next. πŸ˜€

      • anaatcalin said,

        It’s often the same with me too, LOL

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        LOL !

        I often wondered whether that happened with J.K Rowling as well since her characters seem so real.

        Often if the characters are real, it’s usually because they have a mind of their own. πŸ˜€

      • anaatcalin said,

        Very good point, Chris! Sometimes it’s worth wondering… Could it be that characters in bestsellers are actually real people and the story is real? This is probably why people relate so well to them (Joke, of course πŸ™‚ )
        Have you read J.K.’s (as Robert Galbraith!) the Cormoran Strike series? It’s not magic, it’s detective/thriller but it’s magnificent! (The Cuckoo’s Calling, the Silkwor, Career of Evil – loved this last one!). I love how J.K. can make a man without a leg, big and virtually furry, heavy smoker a.s.o. actually become so attractive! She’s a master of her trade, all right.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        No, I haven’t read those books under her pseudonym Robert Galbraith.

        I’ll have to take a look at them. πŸ™‚

      • anaatcalin said,

        You’d love them!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        This detective character you describe sounds quite interesting- furry and a heavy smoker.

        Sounds like my walking talking chain smoking Saint Bernard dog private eye Dudley Dashing.

        Of course J.K. Rowling’s literary agent Christopher Little did love that novel and told me so in a 5-page personally handwritten and signed letter but said he was too busy to take on another client (although at the time I got this reply I had no idea that he was J.K. Rowling’s literary agent).

  2. Hyperion said,

    I really like how the gang finds themselves in the midst of the upper crust of society with great ease. The last paragraph was belly laugh good. It’s great comedy and every word of it true. I would be very concerned about taking my goldfish to the tub with me as the goldfish has a longer attention span and could actually get inside my decision cycles and outsmart me. Next thing you know it has me feeding it, changing its water, and looking for companions for it to fill those lonely nights. We need to be careful who we put in the tub with us. πŸ˜€

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Indeed.

      As that old nursery rhyme went,

      “Rub-a-dub-dub
      3 men in a tub”.

      Now that’s probably a gay man’s dream.

      But for heterosexual males, it’s a little too close for comfort. πŸ˜€

      • Hyperion said,

        Add 3 Vampiresses and 3 Dragon Sisters and the proper amount of protective cushioning can be arranged. Of course, if Michelangelo is in the mix it could blow out the sides.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        With 3 Vampiresses and 3 Dragon Sisters, no protective cushioning is required. πŸ˜€

        Unless of course it’s Nature’s naturally endowed protective cushioning. πŸ˜‰

        A hot tub of milk and honey. πŸ˜‰

  3. doesitevenmatter3 said,

    The ending got a laugh and a sigh outa’ me. πŸ˜› Funny, but sigh-ful. I hope this generation learns to put their phones (away more) and the internet in perspective…I hope they start spending more time with other people face-t0-face.
    BTW: That would be a good movie for Mr. Scorsese to make! πŸ˜€
    HUGS!!! πŸ™‚

  4. ѕнєяяιє βˆ‚Ρ” ναℓєяια said,

    A whole world of Supernatural in one enterprise! LOL
    Wonderful, Chris!
    Cannot imagine the place that filled with strange creatures like them and lobster tank, etc …
    Much more interesting than the Man In Black Buro. LOL
    (γ₯q◕‿‿◕q)γ₯

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