Limerick Sung By Captain Jack Sparrow: A Poem

April 28, 2016 at 8:16 pm (Arts, Celebrities, Entertainment, Humour, News, Poetry) (, , , , , , )

Limerick Sung By Captain Jack Sparrow: A Poem

I took my puppy dogs to Australia
where I encountered an Agriculture Minister without genitalia
He told me my dogs did not have the proper ID
so one of them raised a hind leg and took on said minister a pee
now I’m forced to make a video looking like an endorsing Trump Chris Christie.

-A limerick sung by Captain Jack Sparrow

from a poem written by Christopher
Thursday April 28th 2016.



  1. The sarejessian said,

    Arrrr me Matie it be a hanging offence.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,


      It be a hanging offense.

      Married men throughout the world are sending their mothers-in-law on an all expenses paid trip to Australia and even packing their luggage for them- with small puppy dogs smuggled inside of course. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  2. ั•ะฝั”ััฮนั” โˆ‚ั” ฮฝฮฑโ„“ั”ัฮนฮฑ said,

    LOL What the? …
    Have you got supernatural mushrooms drug before you wrote this???

    How come is the Agriculture Minister without genitalia???
    Cannot imagine that. Neither are aliens, you know. LOL

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      ROTFL ! , Sherrie.

      In North American culture, to say a man is without genitalia is to imply that he’s not a man.

      Remember Johnny Depp’s wife had to appear in court recently for illegally bringing their two dogs into Australia.

      Then she and Johnny Depp had to make a video apologizing for illegally bringing their dogs into the country.

      And Australia’s Agriculture Minister (who’s the one in charge of Australia’s livestock and animal quarantine laws) said that Johnny Depp appeared very wooden in that video when he said at the end, “Declare everything when you enter Australia.”

      Indeed Johnny Depp looked the same way that New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie looked after he had endorsed Donald Trump for President.

      Anyways in this limerick, I was just responding in the way that Johnny Depp’s character of Captain Jack Sparrow would react to Australia’s animal quarantine laws and what his opinion would be of Australia’s Agriculture Minister. LOL !

      • ั•ะฝั”ััฮนั” โˆ‚ั” ฮฝฮฑโ„“ั”ัฮนฮฑ said,

        … this is one of the WP glitch again. I did replied to this note here, but just realized my message didn’t appear here at all. :/

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        That’s too bad. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

        What did your original message say, Sherrie? ๐Ÿ™‚

        I’d like to know.

        And as far as WP glitches go, we’ll have to send Sherrielock Holmes down to the WP offices and tomato some buns and get their butts whipped into working shape.

        LOL !

      • ั•ะฝั”ััฮนั” โˆ‚ั” ฮฝฮฑโ„“ั”ัฮนฮฑ said,

        I was commenting on non-genitalia creatures in the woods and that it became the X-Files cases later. Mulder & Scully came to find them extremely interesting as the government want to do study on their non-existence of genital parts.

        Mulder : Scully, how do you think that do their business?
        Scully : I cannot imagine that, Scully. Why asked a woman on such?
        Mulder: God had made a mistake on them. That is why they kidnapped us and studied our body and how the system work. I think that is why their head were big and bloated because they cannot go to the toilet to release themselves … Too painful to keep it in their intestines way too long … God forgot to make those important parts from them.
        Scully:Mulder … Shut up!


      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        LOL ! , Sherrie. ๐Ÿ˜€

        Excellently written comedic dialogue.

        I can actually picture Fox Mulder and Dana Scully carrying on a conversation like that.

        LOL !

      • ั•ะฝั”ััฮนั” โˆ‚ั” ฮฝฮฑโ„“ั”ัฮนฮฑ said,

        I did not know why I wrote that message that way … LOL
        My head was full of magic mushrooms!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        And the X-Files music was playing in the background while you were eating those mushrooms.

        And a fox eating muldy cheese suddenly appeared playing with one of those plastic skulls they use in Shakespeare plays and then the phone rang and someone asked, “Is Dana there?” and then you wrote this short play. ๐Ÿ˜€

      • ั•ะฝั”ััฮนั” โˆ‚ั” ฮฝฮฑโ„“ั”ัฮนฮฑ said,

        Yeah, it was me all along … LOL
        It is all those mushrooms fault!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        LOL !

  3. Hyperion said,

    So my favorite pirate got his peg leg in hot water for not declaring his dogs who no doubt did some dastardly dog thing and left several unwed mother’s with a passle of pups upon their hasty departure.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes and all the Australian canines are complaining to one another about those damned Yankee mutts “who came, saw, conquered, came again (in another sense of that word) and then left without pup support payments.” ๐Ÿ˜€

      • Hyperion said,

        Pirate dawgs be like that. ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Arrrr sure these sea dogs be the worse dogs of all. Arrr.

      • Hyperion said,

        Bwaaaa haaa haaa! Be the Dawg not the Fire hydrant. ๐Ÿ˜€

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        And not Australia’s Minister of Agriculture missing his genitalia. ๐Ÿ˜€

      • Hyperion said,

        He has run afoul of the Dragon Sisters it appears.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Indeed. ๐Ÿ™‚

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