A UK Election Campaign Debate Like No Other

May 25, 2017 at 3:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Politics, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Renfield R. Renfield was attending his first election campaign debate in the constituency where he was running- Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds. London dominatrix Sherrielock Holmes was serving as the debate chairwoman since both Renfield and sitting incumbent British Conservative MP Agathor Christie were clients of her dominatrix services.

The sponsors of the debate thought that Sherrielock could keep at least two of the six candidates running in line.

Renfield R. Renfield was of course running as the candidate for the British Transhumanist Techno-Progressive Anti Bio-Conservative Party in the constituency.

The debate would begin with each candidate giving a 5-minute speech talking about their past accomplishments in life.

Conservative MP Agathor Christie had to be cut short after 5 minutes by Sherrielock Holmes and he had only got up to talking about his first year in kindergarten.

When Renfield got up to speak, he said, “Here’s one of the many music videos I’ve made in my life which should give you an idea of my accomplishments.”

On the background screen behind the candidates, a video is then shown.

The video begins with a short clip of popular 1960s singer Nancy Sinatra singing one of her biggest hits.

Nancy Sinatra (singing very slowly and very sensuously the opening lines of one of her biggest hits):

Strawberries, cherries and an angel’s kiss in spring
My summer wine is really made from all these things
ooh- summer wine…

The short clip is then followed by a film shot of Renfield R. Renfield dressed as a beautiful looking diva female drag queen wearing an exquisite tight fitting silver sequined evening dress and singing while holding a microphone.

Renfield (singing very sensuously): Strawberries, cherries and an angel’s kiss in spring…

(He breaks into a wide broad smile)

Renfield (continues to sing very sensuously): My summer behind is really made from all these things…

(He turns around and bends over showing a magnificently big tight evening dress accentuated skirted ass that would make Kim Kardashian’s grandiosely big skirted ass Instagram whammy that broke the Internet look positively microscopic by comparison)

Renfield (still singing sensuously): ooh- summer behind…

(At that point, the debate chairwoman Sherrielock Holmes sank off her chair onto the floor overcome by a huge fit of gales of laugher)

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday May 25th

Kim Kardashian's Magnificent Skirted Ass
Kim Kardashian’s Magnificent Skirted Ass: Only Renfield R. Renfield’s breaks the Internet better


  1. doesitevenmatter3 said,

    HA! You go Renfield! πŸ˜€ I’d rather see your arse break the internet, than Mrs. K. West’s arse! πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜›

    You know that “game” or thingee where they ask “Which famous persons, living or dead, would you like to have dinner with?”

    I’d chose Renfield R. Renfield! What fun that would be! πŸ˜€

    HUGS!!! πŸ™‚

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Oh, thank you very much, Carolyn. πŸ™‚

      Renfield would be very honoured and pleased to hear that of all the people living or dead to have dinner with, you’d choose him. πŸ˜€

      Yes, what a dinner conversation that would be. πŸ˜‰

  2. eliza rudolf said,

    Well βœ’ pennedπŸ‘ŒπŸ‘Œ

  3. maxlcrepeau said,

    I’d chose Renfield R. !

  4. leroyjhunt said,


  5. Dracul Van Helsing said,

    Reblogged this on Dracul Van Helsing and commented:

    A chapter I wrote 3 years ago- when Renfield ran for MP against British Tory MP Agathor Christie- an election Renfield went on to win.

  6. Jessica E. Larsen said,

    πŸ’˜ Renfield! He’s sensuous singing ringing in my ears… wahh… I’m turning jelly… no wait…

    πŸ˜’ I’m just an idiot fangirl. But who cares!

    Renfield! Wohooo! πŸ˜†

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, Renfield for MP! πŸ˜€

      It’s no surprise he won this election. πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»

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