Dracul, Aphrodite and Ares

June 18, 2017 at 3:45 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

When Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing returned to his office at MI-6 Diablos Nocturna Division Headquarters, he was surprised to see the Greek goddess Aphrodite sitting there waiting for him.

“Aphrodite,” Dracul said, “What a pleasant surprise. Have you brought more news about Hephaestus?”.

“No,” Aphrodite shook her head, “Hephaestus has given up building missiles for North Korea’s Kim Jong-un. He’s now working on building incredible machines for a steampunk genre sci-fi film about Jack the Ripper escaping down the Thames River in a submarine.”

“I’ll have to see that movie when it comes out,” said Dracul.

“Have you seen the new Wonder Woman film?” Aphrodite asked.

“Not yet,” said Dracul, “but I’d like to. It sounds like an excellent film judging from the reviews. It’s set against the background of the First World War which I’ve recently started studying. The First World War is often overshadowed by World War II and yet World War II would not have happened without the events set in motion during World War I.”

“Do you know what the film is about?” The goddess asked.

“Diana battling Ares the god of war,” Dracul answered.

“Yes, and the film seems to be somewhat prophetic,” Aphrodite stated, “my brother Ares is now under the impression that he should really start World War III at the moment.”

“Well, all the chess pieces are certainly now in place,” Dracul conceded, “Vladimir Putin is in the Middle East, Donald Trump is in the Oval Office, Kim Jong-un is in the nuthouse playground building missiles, Saudi Arabia and Iran are now making war noises against one another, and an airhead is now Prime Minister of the British Empire.”

“That’s about it,” said Aphrodite.

Dracul Van Helsing alerted Peter Whitstable the Fox Mulder of Interpol as to the Greek war god’s plans.

“Anything else?” Dracul inquired of Aphrodite.

“Have you been a good boy this past week?” Aphrodite asked him.

“No, I haven’t,” Dracul admitted, “I’ve been a very naughty boy.”

“Well then,” Aphrodite smoothed her skirt, “you better get across my knee and I’ll give you a good spanking.”

Dracul did so.

Aphrodite gave him a good spanking.

And then they made wild passionate love afterwards.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday June 18th


  1. doesitevenmatter3 said,

    Dracul has such bloody good fun! πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜›
    And he hangs with the most interesting people! πŸ˜€
    HUGS!!! πŸ™‚

  2. Aak fictionspawn said,

    I’ve been a naughty boy too! I promise:D Great chapter.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks very much.

      Say I was going to ask you, did you accidentally label one of my comments as spam?

      The reason I ask you is several weeks ago, I got a WordPress notification that you had liked one of my comments on one of your stories.

      Then when I clicked on View comment, the comment wasn’t there- nowhere in sight.

      Then I noticed whenever I wrote a comment and clicked Post on one of your stories, the comment would never show up.

      I re-wrote the comment a couple of times and still nothing happened.

      It never appeared.

      I thought you had either banned me from commenting on your site or sometimes what happens when you have to approve a comment for moderation on your site, you can mark the comment as Spam.

      I thought you might have clicked Like for liking my comment but then you accidently clicked Spam as well meaning that my future comments would never show up on your site.

      That’s why I haven’t commented on your posts the past few weeks.

      The first few times I did, my comments would never show up.

      • Aak fictionspawn said,

        Hm, I’ll look into it right away. Something must have happened. Thanks for letting me know, of course your comments are always very welcome on my blog.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Thanks, that’s good to hear.

        I thought it was strange that you had liked my comment and then the comment never showed up when I clicked View comment.

        I know when I approve a comment for moderation, the Spam button is right next to the Like button and I remember once I had clicked Spam right after clicking Like. Fortunately I noticed it right away. So I just went back and clicked Not Spam.

      • Aak fictionspawn said,

        It did happen to me once before as well. That I know of… :/ Blogging on the phone is not the best way, but it’s very comfortable on the sofa:)

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, blogging on the phone is very comfortable on the sofa. πŸ˜€

      • Aak fictionspawn said,

        Do you remember which post it was?

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I believe it might have been the one on Fire.

        Because that showed up the first time I commented on it and then the next day, it was Gone.

        Because I then tried to comment on your Water, Air and Earth posts the next few days and none of my comments would show up.

  3. Dracul Van Helsing said,

    Reblogged this on Dracul Van Helsing and commented:

    Here’s a vampire novel chapter I wrote almost a year ago:

  4. David Redpath said,

    So, it was actually Aphrodite
    who gave Dracul a good old
    Neo Classical mighty !

  5. David Redpath said,

    Was Mighty Aphrodite,
    sporting an afro hairdo,
    wearing a grecian nightie?
    And does Dracul
    agree with Madonna
    that there’s nothing like
    a good spankie?

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      In the midnight hour
      will Dracul feel the power?
      Is Aphrodite like a virgin touched for the very first time?
      And does Donald Trump keep pushing Kim Jong-un’s love over the borderline?
      Will Kim sing β€œThis used to be my playground?”
      along the 38th parallel
      As the entire world suddenly goes to Hell?
      Pope Francis discovers he’s not San Pedro on La isla bonita
      and breaks into chorus of β€œDon’t cry for me, Argentina.”

      • David Redpath said,

        As Pope Francis prepares
        his sermon for Lent,
        the Little Sisters of Purgatory
        storm the Vatican,
        hell bent and habbits rent,
        chanting ‘Papa Don’t Preach’.

      • David Redpath said,

        “But Little Sisters,
        don’t you do what your
        big sister done.
        For I have prepared
        one hell of a speach!”
        ~ Pee Jay Pappee

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        LOL !

        That’s hilarious, David. πŸ˜‚

        We should write a musical to this.

        Maybe Redpath and Milner will join the ranks of Rodgers and Hammerstein, Lerner and Lowe and of course Andrew Lloyd Webber.

  6. Orvillewrong said,

    Oh! for just one sane person in the corridors of power!

  7. ortensia said,

    A good spank has always a good effectπŸ’ƒπŸ»

  8. thebookwormdrinketh said,

    πŸ‘πŸ’–πŸ» The Wonder Woman movie almost inspired me to start WWIII… although, that was because it pissed me off. Ha ha! All of those poor men in the trenches FOREVER and Wonder Woman just waltzes in, walks across no man’s land and saves the day?? STEALING ALL THE THUNDER?? Also, she couldn’t have figured this whole thing out a little sooner and saved them TWO YEARS AGO?? Way to go Wonder Woman…

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      There was definitely a wrinkle in time when that pilot landed on the Greek island of the Amazons.

      It would have been a lot better if he had landed on the island sooner.

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