Renfield Discusses Dungeons With The Vampire Set

March 14, 2018 at 10:55 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Espionage, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Renfield Discusses Dungeons With The Vampire Set

Renfield R. Renfield MP was discussing the dungeons in the basement of the colossal West London mansion with the mansion’s owner and his former boss the billionaire ancient Egyptian Vampire Set.

“So you want to use part of the basement dungeons as interrogation chambers for MI-6?” Set inquired as he chewed on a roast crocodile.

“That’s right, Boss,” Renfield was used to calling the former Egyptian god of darkness and the desert by that name from the days when he used to work for him.

“Well of course part of the basement dungeons my new Chief of Security and Intelligence Gathering Sherrielock Holmes uses for her dominatrix service,” Set licked crocodile flesh off his fingers.

“I know,” Renfield adjusted the cushions under his tender buttocks, “it’s the other part of the basement dungeons that I’d use.”

“And what prisoners will you be keeping there?” Set belched into the evening air.

“Some Russian military intelligence officers we captured in Syria through the efforts of our allies Prince Vlad Dracula and the Israeli Mossad agent the Controller of the Golem,” Renfield replied.

“So you’re moving quickly against Putin’s Russia eh?” Set drank from a jar of Josef Stalin’s blood he kept for special occasions, “while Theresa May is publicly expelling 23 Russian diplomats from the UK, you’re privately rounding up members of Russia’s high-ranking military and intelligence services?”.

“That is correct,” Renfield said, “because if Putin wants to get into a pissing contest with me, he better have strong and powerful kidneys because mine are made of steel.”

Set who was privately worried these days (and nights) that he might finally be coming down with senility at his advanced age of a few thousand years wrinkled his forehead.

He was trying to remember if his Chief Scientist at Set Enterprises Dr. Cadbury Rocher had equipped Renfield R. Renfield with steel kidneys when he had genetically created him in a lab.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday March 14th
2018.

27 Comments

  1. Shreya Sukrity said,

    Again a great work.

  2. missschade said,

    I love reading that stuff. This morning with coffee, blofeldish with my cat on my lap. Perfect morning. Thank you!

  3. velvetscreams said,

    powerful kidneys because mine are made of steel…….😂😂😂😂😂….you always have funny contents in your story…this was great!😃😃

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thank you, Priscilla. 😀😀

      Yes, it’s always a good thing to be able to start one’s day with a good laugh.
      😂😂😂😂😂

      Always happy to oblige. 😀😀😀

      • velvetscreams said,

        Thank you for this…and you are welcome…your write-ups just keep getting better😊😊😊

  4. George F. said,

    I bet I could convince Reinfield to have a pissing contest against the wind. That would be fun.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Knowing Renfield, he’d probably win. 😂

      The four Anemoi- Boreas, Zephyrus, Notus and Eurus would never have encountered anything like it. 😂

      • George F. said,

        I couldn’t compete with Renfield…I’d just like to see the spray!! LOL!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I meant that Renfield would win in a pissing contest against the wind 💨.

        LOL !

        And the 4 winds of Greek mythology would be totally baffled 😮😮😮😮.

        It was on another blog post where you said you’d challenge Renfield to a pissing contest against the wind. 😂

        I guess that’s what happens when you astral project out of your body so much that you end up visiting and commenting on the wrong blog post. 😂

        And other people who happen to read your comment think that they’re reading a tweet by Donald Trump. 😂

        Of course one of my novel’s characters the DARPA contract assassin Pan Goatee when he astral projects out of his body is also able to form an astral laser machete out of thin air.

        Imagine the chaos that would result if Paul was able to form an astral smart phone 📲 out of thin air while he was out of body experiencing and happening to send text messages and photos to the wrong person.

        I imagine Akira would really be pissed 😠 and Paul would have an awful lot of explaining to do. 😂

      • George F. said,

        LOL! Just…LOL!

  5. Orvillewrong said,

    As always, totally entertaining!

  6. fragglerocking said,

    Renfield is my new hero.

  7. RosemaryMarie said,

    I enjoy your writing so much. 🙂 It’s very entertaining.

  8. shєrríє dє vαlєríα said,

    And Set need not a surgery on his thousands wrinkled face, he is a God!

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, he doesn’t need to go to one of those expensive Beverley Hills plastic surgeons. 😂

      • shєrríє dє vαlєríα said,

        He has the gold, but he need not one.
        His thousand years old wrinkles are his secret immortal power. LOL

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Just like Sherrielock Holmes’ secret of her immortal power lies in her Lingzhi Supernatural mushrooms (that must be eaten without thousand year old eggs or otherwise you’ll turn into terracotta statues like what happened to the soldiers of the 1st Emperor of China).

      • shєrríє dє vαlєríα said,

        Oh damn!
        You know my secret to Immortality now!
        Geeezzz … You just cracked the Code!
        LOL

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        LOL ! 😂

        Yes, we’ll leave the thousand year old eggs for Donald Trump and he can turn into a terracotta statue that we’ll put in the middle of the park so the pigeons can have something to relieve themselves on. 🤣

      • shєrríє dє vαlєríα said,

        Then his butler would come and sweep it all off, and tweet it in the next thousand years … lol

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        ROTFLMFAO! 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣

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