Herb Takes A Walk: A Short Short Story

June 27, 2018 at 9:20 pm (Short stories, Short Story) ()

Herb Takes A Walk: A Short Short Story

Herb decided to take a walk in the neighbourhood.

He decided to walk across a school field.

There was a sign warning him that the grass had recently been sprayed.

It didnโ€™t bother Herb at all.

He walked across the field.

Halfway across the field, he keeled over and died.

Later the coroner explained the cause of death.

The sign had warned him Herbicide Application Applied Today.

Herb had ignored the sign at his peril.

-A short short story
Written by Christopher
Wednesday June 27th
2018.

21 Comments

  1. George F. said,

    OMG that’s fricken funny! I have a friend named Jen if you want to spray some Jen-O-Side like our president seems to be doing! LOL! Speaking of spraying, Lasetter is doing some more spraying in my new (longer) post! Drop on by!

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks,,George. ๐Ÿ˜€

      Yes, Trump seems to be anxious to practice Jen-o-cide these day. โ˜ ๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ฟ

  2. Hyperion said,

    Yes itโ€™s true in the land of the Great Orange Oracle. Ignoring the signs is a leading cause of death, destruction, and dismay.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, the Angel of the Apocalypse is flying across the land shouting, โ€œWoe! Woe! Woe!โ€.

      The Great Orange Oracle is telling porn stars to โ€œBlow! Blow! Blow!โ€.

      Lunatic fringe Republicans are cheering the Great Orange Oracleโ€™s policies and urging him to carry on and โ€œGo! Go! Go!โ€.

      Liberal Democrats are visualizing in their minds an American Stalin to come, arise and fight and slay the American Hitler and are shouting, โ€œJoe! Joe! Joe!โ€.

      Meanwhile Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-un and Xi Jinping are licking their lips in anticipation and shouting, โ€œHo! Ho! Ho!โ€.

      And yet everyone is ignoring the signs of the times.

      Burying their heads in the sand like ostriches and saying โ€œNo! No! No!โ€.

      • Hyperion said,

        I feel deep in the century of my mercury soaked bones, in my leaded blood, and my zinc deposited skin that this, my friend is an apocalyptic prophecy that will render Nasal Dummass, the King of Quatrains, a blind heretic. Soon, the Vladimir will be adding his Ho to the Ho Ho of Kim and Xi.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        And as the old saying goes, โ€œThis too will come to pass.โ€

      • Hyperion said,

        Yes, and if it’s gas that passes, the world will take on the the who farted look of post Karmic events.

  3. velvetscreams said,

    Never ignore something without getting know what is written…great story written๐Ÿ˜„

  4. Orvillewrong said,

    its like crossing the road ignore the little green man at your peril!

  5. David Redpath said,

    Herb Toast !

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Particularly if he winds up in the Hell that Pope Francis says doesn’t exist. ๐Ÿ˜‚

      • David Redpath said,

        Perhaps if Herb was instead
        a Garlic Toast, at least he
        would not end up a Hades
        Vampiric brunch!?

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Thatโ€™s a very good point, David. ๐Ÿ˜‚

  6. doesitevenmatter3 said,

    OH, poor Herb!!! And how awful to target people named Herb!!!
    ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜€
    Ha!
    When I use herbs (“erbs”) in cooking, I always call them “H”erb!!! ๐Ÿ˜›
    HUGS!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      LOL !, Carolyn.

      You certainly take the H out of the herbs ๐ŸŒฟ with all that extra spice you add to your cooking, I imagine. ๐Ÿ˜‚

  7. Kymber said,

    LOL Great story. ๐Ÿ˜€

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