Gali-Gula Proposes An NRC Contract Assassin, Cthulhu On California Coast and The 3 Fates of Greek Mythology
Gali-Gula Proposes An NRC Contract Assassin, Cthulhu On California Coast and The Three Fates of Greek Mythology
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was feeling depressed.
The reason?
Deteriorating relations with Saudi Arabia 🇸🇦.
Canada had called for the release of Saudi-American woman human rights campaigner Samar Badawi from jail after being arrested by the so-called “reform” government of asshole Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman.
Saudi Arabia over the protest froze all trade with Canada and expelled Canada’s ambassador to Saudi Arabia 🇸🇦.
One of the Saudi government’s verified Twitter accounts showed an image of a Saudi plane flying towards Toronto’s famed CN Tower about to crash into it (thus supporting British MP Renfield R. Renfield’s theory that some high Saudi government officials secretly backed Osama bin Laden and the 9/11 attacks).
The tweet was later deleted but had been caught by Canadian Government computer screenshots.
Inhaling marijuana smoke breathed out by Strawberry Fields Forever the Canadian Prime Minister’s pot smoking desert cactus 🌵 plant inside the greenhouse, Gali-Gula the ET gray from Nibiru appeared to the pot inhaler Justin Trudeau and suggested that the NRC (National Research Council of Canada) create an NRC equivalent of DARPA contract assassin Pan Goatee who will conduct assassinations on behalf of the Canadian government.
Justin replied that was a good idea and said in the meantime that he was going to ask British MP Renfield R. Renfield to pay a visit to Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman given Renfield’s recent triumphant victories over the Russian Wolves nationalist motorcycle gang and the Mexican Disciples of Santa Muerte drug cartel.
. . .
Cthulhu the several hundred metres tall giant octopus 🐙, dragon 🐉 and human (first foreseen by early 20th Century American horror writer H. P. Lovecraft) was approaching the City of San Francisco, California.
“Oh shit,” said Democratic Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi on the deck of her boat when she saw him approach and proceeded to do just that.
Giving a whole new meaning to the term Poop 💩 Deck.
. . .
British MP Renfield R. Renfield wearing a t-shirt that said PSYCHOPATHS 4 GOOD (that was bought for him by New Orleans vampiress Angelique Dumont after his recent massacre and mass bodily dismemberment of the entire Disciples of Santa Muerte drug cartel) and a pair of Pan Goatee image emblazoned Hawaiian style boxer shorts was giving a speech to the Annual August Summer Banquet of the London Press Club.
Sitting in the audience were the 3 beautiful Fates of Greek Mythology- all of whom had become quite smitten with Renfield.
Renfield began his speech, “In the words of a great wise man… a journey of a thousand miles always begins… with a trip to the washroom.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday August 6th
2018.
The 3 Fates of Greek Mythology listening to British MP Renfield R. Renfield speak at the Annual August Summer Banquet of The London Press Club
Dracul Van Helsing 
rudellenatashamay said,
August 6, 2018 at 11:16 pm
Great piece. Love it pretty much. 😊
Dracul Van Helsing said,
August 6, 2018 at 11:49 pm
Thank you, Rudelle. 😊
kahoon said,
August 6, 2018 at 11:49 pm
Well shit, so much spoil of blood and and oil when energy is free and in constant waste. Oh well. What cha gunna do,
Dracul Van Helsing said,
August 7, 2018 at 4:03 pm
Yes, we can’t call Ghostbusters to do a away with the problem since they only battle ghostly pests.
Orvillewrong said,
August 7, 2018 at 9:00 am
Awe inspiring as always!
Dracul Van Helsing said,
August 7, 2018 at 4:13 pm
Thanks, Malkie. 😀
thebookwormdrinketh said,
August 7, 2018 at 11:48 am
Ha ha!! New meaning to the phrase “poop deck”!… Yes, an entire fabulous story… And Nicole can’t get over the poop joke. 🤣😅
Dracul Van Helsing said,
August 7, 2018 at 4:04 pm
Glad you enjoyed the poop deck joke, Nicole. 😂😀
David Redpath said,
August 7, 2018 at 4:49 pm
“Arabia is a foreign country.
They do things differently there.
So we sent the Seven Sisters
of petroleum
to teach them
how the West does business.
Now the Sheiks,
and the Bush’s,
have cash to spare.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
August 7, 2018 at 5:12 pm
Yes, the Sheiks and the Bushes have plenty of cash to spare.
Hyperion said,
August 7, 2018 at 6:43 pm
Fabulous piece Dracul. I used more of my magic mushroom cleaner after the Smancie Piglosi butt plug blowing scene. My screen had a healthy dose of guffaw on it. I thought The GOO may have unduly influenced the Prince of Dune to strike harshly at the House Trudeau as Canada was recently put on the US list of countries that pose a national security risk by selling us affordable alloys. And the mass of good Canadian whisky coming across the border has clearly besotted Congress for decades. I smell a conspiracy theory. Winter is coming.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
August 7, 2018 at 7:49 pm
Yes, beer prices may be going up because it now costs more to make beer cans.
There will be massive tariffs on Canadian whisky that only Congressmen and Senators will now be able to afford it.
Alex Jones has been thrown off YouTube so the conspiracy to smuggle Canadian whisky in Canadian shoes will not be exposed.
Just another happy day in GOO land.