Wilkie The Cat Performs Nat King Cole: A Poem
Wilkie The Cat
had a lovers’ spat
His girlfriend Mitzi
was raging spitzy
She had broken her parasol
saving Wilkie from a very deep hole
by red hot pokering a Saudi librarian mole
Trump defended the Saudi librarian assassin
and took to Twitter tweety bashin’
Saudi Arabia had threatened to fly planes into Canadian Toronto’s CN Tower
while Mohammad bin Salman like Putin gave Trump a golden shower
No wonder the Donald’s hairpiece was a sickening gold yellow toupee
for Putin and the Saudi Crown Prince performed like it was a rainy day
Mid-term elections were soon on the way
Was Robert Mueller making hay?
Democrats wondered
as Lizzie Warren blundered
The New York Times defended the Senator’s DNA test
because of brains and intelligence, The Times had not been blessed
It took one to hate one was that old adage
which is why Trump and The Times exchanged nasty tweets and cabbage
But fortunately for Wilkie’s relationship, he got a good gig
and an assignment that his girl Mitzi should really dig
He and she were invited to perform at a political party function
and did not have to play the part of Beverly Hillbillies at Petticoat Junction
It was at the Lincoln Performing Arts Centre
and Wilkie promised Mitzi he wouldn’t go on a bender
Mitzi dressed as Elizabeth Warren took to the stage
while politicos gazed at her like lions released from a cage
Mitzi began to sing,
Cherokee people,
Cherokee tribe,
so proud to live
so proud to die
…
and maybe someday when we’ve learned,
Cherokee Nation will return, will return
Wilkie The Cat came on stage dressed like Nat King Cole,
he really relished getting into this role
He pointed at Mitzi as Warren and began to sing,
“Oh yes, she’s the great pretender…”
after the show, Wilkie went on a bender.
For he got the attending crowd wrong
turning this into his Lincoln Center swan song
He thought he was performing to Republicans but alas! they were Democrats
and now Wilkie and Mitzi were once again unemployed performing arts cats.
-A Wilkie The Cat poem
written by Christopher
Friday October 19th
2018.
George F. said,
October 19, 2018 at 9:14 pm
Timely, spot on satire that has me rolling in the isles…especially the golden shower part. Eeehhh!!! I, too, put up a new post tonight! Love this one!
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 19, 2018 at 9:16 pm
Thanks, George. 😃
George F. said,
October 19, 2018 at 9:31 pm
You can actually keep me laughing for day! You’re a reward in and of yourself! LOL!
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 19, 2018 at 9:52 pm
That’s a sheer joy to hear, George. 😂
George F. said,
October 19, 2018 at 9:31 pm
days…
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 19, 2018 at 9:55 pm
And then there’s Donald Trump whose original performance kept Stormy Daniels laughing for nights.
Hyperion said,
October 20, 2018 at 6:53 am
Waaaa haaaa haaaa haaaaaaa! Poor Wilkie. He has it made with his dear Mitzi and yet he still manages to Tomcat the hell out of his future with her. And may the true red E. Warren seek shelter under the GOO’s toupee during the Russian rainy season. Now, I need to clean my iPad screen. Wonder if Sherrielock has any magic mushroom cleaner left? I sure go through a lot of it.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 20, 2018 at 4:05 pm
This time I imagine your wet screen was caused by guffawing your coffee or bourbon rather than organ grinding at the thought of Elizabeth Warren. 😂
Hyperion said,
October 20, 2018 at 6:05 pm
Yes, I will admit to snort laughing all over my screen. I think Mitzi’s parasol properly applied to the EW, would be a sucessful pay per view arena event.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 20, 2018 at 9:31 pm
And centuries from now, Mitzi’s famous parasol will be auctioned off at Christie’s Auction House under the nickname Pocahontas’ Revenge.
Hyperion said,
October 21, 2018 at 5:54 am
Waaaa haaaa haaaaa! Oh my, I just blew guffaw stuff all over my screen again. I’m going to have to install a windshield washer and wipers on my iPad. I’m more and more liking Wilkie and Mitzi and especially Mitzi’s parasol talents.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 21, 2018 at 6:07 pm
Yes if the United Star Ship Enterprise really wants to seek out strange new worlds, it will have to boldly go where Mitzi’s parasol has gone before. 😂
Hyperion said,
October 21, 2018 at 7:13 pm
Into the Mystic to infinite and beyond as my ole friend Buzz Lightyear used to say.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 21, 2018 at 7:49 pm
Elizabeth Warren’s punishment in Tartarus is Mitzi’s parasol up her muckchute performing as an eternal motion machine while being forced to watch old news videos of Pope Francis saying there is no Hell.
Hyperion said,
October 22, 2018 at 1:42 am
Waaa haaaa haaaa! I had a nice visual of that. And of course, the only icewater in Hell is over at the GOO’s groto.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 22, 2018 at 1:58 am
Yes with the GOO’s right hand frozen to the frozen pussy of the Norse underworld goddess Hel.
Hyperion said,
October 22, 2018 at 11:16 am
And Hel’s man is steadily beating the goop out of the GOO with his warhammer. 😁
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 22, 2018 at 3:52 pm
And it takes a great deal of talent and skill on the part of Hel’s man to hit a thingy so small with his warhammer. 😂😅
Hyperion said,
October 23, 2018 at 2:53 am
Apparently, Hel serves a lot of mince meat pie in her kitchen.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 23, 2018 at 2:34 pm
Yes, Hel’s Kitchen has quite the reputation.
Particularly in New York City. 😅
Hyperion said,
October 24, 2018 at 2:58 pm
Yes, I think a lot was cooked up in Hel’s kitchen in NY.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 24, 2018 at 8:52 pm
The recipe for Sodom and Gomorrah pie was originally cooked up there and then the recile spread across the country.
Hyperion said,
October 25, 2018 at 2:34 am
I think that pie is an all time favorite amongst the masses.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 25, 2018 at 5:42 am
Particularly amongst the Jesuit Masses. 😅
Hyperion said,
October 25, 2018 at 12:47 pm
A chaste Jesuit to his pervy brothers: Sodomites to the left of me. Sodomites to the right. And here I am, stuck in the middle of you and I don’t know what to do. I do know what not to do. My shoelaces will remain untied. Not gonna bend over on the pew to tie them shoes. “BOINK!” Arrrrrrgh!
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 25, 2018 at 3:25 pm
Jesuits will even do it standing.
Hyperion said,
October 25, 2018 at 3:53 pm
As many an alterboy will attest.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 25, 2018 at 6:47 pm
Indeed.
Mental.FLO' said,
October 20, 2018 at 10:28 pm
wow you got some talent forreal . love the poem
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 21, 2018 at 12:37 am
Thank you very much. 😃
David Redpath said,
October 22, 2018 at 3:24 pm
I ethnically identify
as a cat
so I fully relate
to where Wilkie,
and his piece of fluff,
Mitzi are at 🐱.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 22, 2018 at 3:55 pm
Wilkie will be pleased to know what a friend he has in David. 😆
David Redpath said,
October 26, 2018 at 12:01 am
But will Robert Mueller
be a ferocious lion
or a neutered pussy?
Dracul Van Helsing said,
October 26, 2018 at 12:05 am
That is the 6 million ruble question.