The Mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon In New Orleans: A Carson Albion Private Eye Poem

January 1, 2019 at 11:55 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Poetry, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Out on the bayou
in an old cabin built on stilts in the water
was where Carson Cody Albion Private Eye
had his New Orleans private eye’s office

On this New Year’s Day in 1934
Albion had been visited by a white haired
and white bearded gentlemen
who claimed to be the Greek god Zeus
New Orleans was full of such nuts

Zeus was a client of the voodoo High Priestess
Mammy Del Rey

The beautiful and lovely Mammy Del Rey had been reading lizard entrails
for the said gentleman who said he was Zeus
Entrails to determine the whereabouts of the immortal mermaid
Thessalonike of Macedon (who was the half-sister of Alexander the Great)
said to be currently visiting the City of New Orleans

Unfortunately for Mammy and for Zeus
The Voodoo Priest next door
Grandpa Doc Duvalier
performed what turned out to be a successful Resurrection From The Dead spell
as the lizard entrails suddenly got up and walked away from Mammy Del Rey’s ashtray
and dived overboard from Mammy’s house boat cabin into the bayou below
where they were promptly swallowed by a fish

Thus the Mystery of Thessalonike’s whereabouts were now as great a mystery
as they were before Mammy started reading the entrails
So Mammy brought Zeus to Carson Cody Albion Private Eye for help

Mammy had picked up an image from the lizard entrails
prior to their unfortunate resurrection
Mammy drew an image in the sand for Albion
(Albion had a sandbox on his bayou house on stilts
which Louisiana Governor and now U.S. Senator Huey Long
used to play in
whenever he visited Carson Albion’s office)

Albion recognized the image as being the symbol on the matchbooks
given to smoking customers down at Poseidon’s Trident Jazz Club
rather than just giving this info directly to Zeus
The private eye said he’d take the case
and pocketed a fee from Zeus (Albion hoped that Greek drachmas
would be worth a lot in U.S. currency)

After giving Zeus a close-up view of the bayou
(by pushing him overboard)
and then making out with the lovely Voodoo High Priestess Mammy Del Rey
on his waterbed (this early prototype of the popular 1970s bedroom phenomenon had been invented by his good friend Nikola Tesla)
He then headed down to the Poseidon’s Trident Jazz Club

In his private eye trenchcoat pocket he carried a crystal ball snow globe
(containing the image of Thessalonike of Macedon) that had been given him by Mammy Del Rey
Thus he recognized the immortal mermaid half-sister of Alexander The Great right away

The immortal mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon (who was the half-sister of Alexander the Great) in a New Orleans jazz nightclub back in 1934.

The rare colour photo was taken with a little known instant photo colour camera the Teslatroid (the colour equivalent of the first black and white Polaroid cameras that were invented by Edwin Land 14 years later) invented by Nikola Tesla.

Any resemblance between the mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon at this New Year’s Day party in 1934 and singer Taylor Swift at her New Year’s Day party in 2019 is purely coincdental.

Surely thereafter Thessalonike was set upon by the mysterious Jaguar Woman of New Orleans
(a woman who was able to shapeshift into a Black Jaguar)
The woman who called herself Semiramis (like the legendary Ho Queen of Babylon) addressed the woman as Mommy Dearest before knocking her to the floor
In the ensuing fish-cat fight that followed
Semiramis’s dress came apart at the seams.


Semiramis: her dress came apart at the seams when she cried Mommy Dearest

To be continued.

-A narrative poem
and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday January 1st
2019.

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