British Transhumanist- Aquarian Age Bonapartist Alliance

April 8, 2019 at 9:29 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Politics, Spy Tales, Technology, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

British MP Renfield R. Renfield’s British Transhumanist Party had just forged an alliance with the French Aquarian Age Bonapartist Party of the Kraken who called himself Napoleon VI.

Should Britain have to take part in the May 23rd to May 26th European Parliamentary elections because of a Brexit extension, the British Transhumanists and French Aquarian Age Bonapartists would run together on a joint ticket with Renfield, the Welsh vampiress Morgana, the Kraken Napoleon VI and his wife Medusa seeking elections to the European Parliament.

At first Renfield had been reluctant to join forces with the Kraken since the cyborg octopus belonged to the Church of Scientology (as a result of the Kraken attending a workshop with Tom Cruise and John Travolta a month ago).

However the Kraken had had lunch with German Chancellor Angela Merkel today where she showed the eight legged creature the 2017 turkey remake of The Mummy that starred Tom Cruise.

After the Egyptian mummy princess Ahmanet, Cruise and the producer of the film jointly laid an egg 20 minutes into the movie, this was too much for the Kraken who swore off both Scientology and non-chicken laid eggs when the film ended.

Merkel broke the good news to Renfield by phone.

The Kraken flew to London from Berlin where Renfield and the would-be Aquarian Age French Emperor signed a pact.

Meanwhile in Washington DC, Donald Trump had labelled Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps a terrorist organization.

The government in Tehran responded by labeling all U.S. Armed Forces in the Middle East a terrorist organization.

And the subject on Dr. Phil’s TV talk show today was childish behaviour shown by world leaders.

And on the Temple Mount in Jerusalem, the winged horse Pegasus had just landed on the mount the night before the Israeli national election.

And Russian President Vladimir Putin had brought in a spiritist medium to communicate with a Russian brown bear said to be possessed by the spirit of Grigori Rasputin as to why Pegasus would be landing on the Temple Mount the night before the Israeli election.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday April 8th


  1. Hyperion said,

    What a great political party formed by Renfield. Perhaps they could have the EU declare the U.S. a colony of Europe with allegiance to Renfield and company until they pay their 300 year old debt to Britain for insulting the King and Queen with their rebelry most embarrasingly displayed at the Boston Tea Party. Oh, and let’s not even mention the thuggery at Bunker Hill. Clearly the Rebels need adult leadership before they disgustingly make America great again with hats that read Dump Trump. 😂

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Sounds like a splendid idea, Daniel. 😄

      • Hyperion said,

        It’s such a shocking idea, it’s bound to work. We need a new Western Emperor like in Rome’s heyday before things got a bit libertine.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, a new western Emperor is just the thing. 👍

      • Hyperion said,

        I’d vote for that. America has run out of honorable leaders. We need to reach out to other countries and find us someone that can go toe to toe with the Demigod rulers of the evil empires while keeping the people of the homeland from buggering each other to death.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Buggering each other to death is definitely an astute observation.

        The ancient city of Sodom is starting to look like a bastion of heterosexual activity when compared with modern day North America.

      • Hyperion said,

        Yes sodomites are the new conservative. I read today that the Democrats hope the first openly gay president is on their horizon. That will certainly relieve all the stress over The Goo being found innocent of collusion with the old Rus Vikings. We never gave the Rus any credit for being smarter than that.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, last night as I was laying in bed, Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster telepathically sent me the politically incorrect statement Renfield made about the openly gay mayor running for President.

        I spent the next 15 minutes in bed laughing my head off.

      • Hyperion said,

        I think Renfield is going to have another grand time with geo-political commentary as there seems to be a flood of useful subjects entering the new age circus called American Politics.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,


        And Renfield has just stated his politically incorrect opinion in the post I just published half an hour ago.

      • Hyperion said,

        LoL 😂. I’ll be on that soon as possible

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,


      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I notice I have 11 likes on that post so far, Daniel, and I only posted it about an hour ago.

        11 likes on one of my blog posts within the space of 1 hour – it’s been a long time since that happened.

        I guess it shows people all over the world are getting sick of political correctness and approve when someone takes it on in Renfieldian fashion.

        This spells serious trouble for all of the leading Democratic politicians in America today and most of the mainstream media whose lips are surgically attached to the buttocks of political correctness.

      • Hyperion said,

        There is a huge upswing in migrations from the Antichrist party Democrats and Paralyzed Ninny Party Republicans to the Independent and Libertarian Parties. This should make things very interesting over the next two years. I suspect the geo-political pickings will be quite rich for Renfield and crew. And we can read about it right here. 😁

  2. annieasksyou said,

    Of course, I’m deeply relieved that the Kraken’s Scientology foray was so brief, though they will undoubtedly come after him again. I forgot to ask: what capabilities does a cyborg Kraken have that a basic, everyday brilliant octopus lacks?

    Btw, your juxtaposition of Dr Phil’s agenda in the midst of all the chaos was superb.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thank you, Annie. ☺

      This Kraken is actually a cyborg octopus.

      Part live octopus and part robot.

      Italian mad scientist Dr. Poseidon Prometheus uploaded his consciousness into the robotic part when he was dying from a fatal disease (one of the claims Transhumanist scientists make is they’ll be able to upload their consciousness into computers and robots just before they die and in this way be able to live forever).

      Dr. Poseidon Prometheus also injected DNA from French Emperors Napoleon Bonaparte The First and Napoleon III (obtained from locks of their hair) into the live octopus brain part in hopes this would make the cyborg octopus Napoleonic in nature.

      This Kraken is partly a human creation as opposed to the Krakens of nature.

      • annieasksyou said,

        Got it. Thank you for filling in the back story, which may have unfolded prior to my liberation from my prejudice against all things Dracula. Silly me—what riches I’d have been missing!

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I put in Greek mythology, Norse mythology, Celtic mythology and Egyptian mythology along with the vampire and werewolf legends and folklore of Central and Eastern Europe along with several dashes of contemporary geopolitics to create quite the potpourri that goes even beyond a dish of Draculaian Hungarian goulash.

  3. David Redpath said,

    Dracul, I just received a dossier, marked
    ‘NOT SECRET’, that claims Angela Merkel
    was originally from Eastern Slovakia, and
    not a Germany. Apparently the illegitimate
    sister of Andy Warhol, she was abandoned
    by her parents as they migrated to the U.S.
    She then fled to Bavaria, after setting fire
    to the orphanage she had been entrusted to,
    with the loss of many young innocent lives.
    Making a new life for herself in Germany,
    Angela soon gained a reputation as the “cheapest crack ho” in Munich.
    The document in question was stamped,
    The L. Ron Hubbard Institute of Truth
    and International Studies.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      That does sound like a document The L. Ron Hubbard Institute of Truth and International Studies would come up with. 😎

  4. Judy Eun Kyung Kim said,

    Love the image of the Kraken at a workshop with Cruise and Travolta😁

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thank you. Yes, that would be quite the scene to see- a Kraken at a workshop with Cruise and Travolta. 😂

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