The Headless Horseman’s Halloween

October 31, 2019 at 10:58 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The Headless Horseman’s Halloween

Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow was sitting in a booth in the lounge in the Saint James Court Hotel in London along with his zombie black horse Bucephalus Reborn.

Both had managed to escape last night from the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s pet attack cat Nefertiti Galore by running down a back alley.

The alley was then blown up by an Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi impersonator who whimpered like a dog and then detonated a suicide vest.

Nefertiti Galore managed to dodge the falling rubble and then went around the corner and had a plate of Fish and Chips at a nearby Fish and Chips shop.

The Headless Horseman and his horse went from the back alley (now blocked by rubble at the street entrance) through the back door of a professional live theatre where they joined the cast of Shakespeare’s Richard III in taking a bow and a curtain call at the end of their performance.

One of the actresses remarked to the actor who played Richard III, “It looks like your horse arrived a little too late.”

The actor who played Richard III remarked to the Headless Horseman, “I’d have given you my kingdom if you had arrived a little sooner.”

The impromptu remarks were met with vigorous applause from the audience.

The Headless Horseman and Bucephalus Reborn then walked to the Saint James Court Hotel where they had booked a room for a couple of nights.

Now they were spending Halloween having drinks in the lounge and dancing with costumed patrons.

Someone dressed as a Vatican Cardinal entered the lounge.

“Authentic costume,” remarked the Headless Horseman who had borrowed a jack o’ lantern pumpkin from the hotel kitchen and put it on his shoulders so he could see.

“I really am a Vatican Cardinal,” answered Samhain Cardinal Salaman, “My flight to the Irish border has been delayed. I was supposed to perform the ancient Celtic Druidic Mass of Samhain this evening on the Irish border between north and south between 11:30 PM and 11:59 PM to forever bind the United Kingdom to the European Union so the whole continent can be under the Egyptian god Osiris when he becomes Pharaoh of the coming United States of Europe. Osiris, Maitreya the Himalayan serpent and golden cobra High King of Ireland are expecting me as are the demons Baal and Baphomet, the High Queen of Ireland who is the resurrected Egyptian Queen Cleopatra and no doubt Yaldabaoth the infamous intoxicated leprechaun who sleeps on the border.”

“Wow, well sit down and have a drink and drown your sorrows,” Friedrich ordered him a drink.

Buchephalus Reborn managed to drink both the Headless Horseman and the Vatican Cardinal under the table.

The Vatican Cardinal missed his next available flight.

And so the Celtic Druidic Mass was not said.

Allowing Britain a brief reprieve from the coming United States of Europe.

-A vampire novel chapter 
written by Christopher
Thursday October 31st
2019.

One of the many beautiful women in the Saint James Court Hotel Lounge lucky enough to dance with the horse Bucephalus Reborn.

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The Great Pumpkin

October 30, 2019 at 10:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery, News, Romance, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

The Great Pumpkin

The vampiress Allatallahbel held an apple in her hands.

The vampiress priestess of Baal held it out to the visitor to the Vatican.

“Halloween apples,” she smiled.

The visitor took the apple, bit into it and ate.

His head immediately exploded leaving an awful mess on the Vatican walls for the Vatican cleaning staff to clean up.

For the apple being from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil had given the man full knowledge of both good and evil.

And naturally, being mortal, he could not handle that knowledge.

So his head exploded leaving brains and cerebral fluids all over a Renaissance portrait of Pope Alexander VI.

The Borgia Pope had never looked so good.

And as for the man who had tasted the knowledge of good and evil, he had surely died.

Making the original Serpent of Eden a liar.

. . .

The Vampiress Priestess of Baal’s ally Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow was riding his zombie black horse Bucephalus Reborn across the lawn of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s colossal West London mansion.

He had been sent here by Allatallahbel to bump off British MP Renfield R. Renfield who had become a major thorn in the side to some of Allatallabel’s vampiress and middle eastern goddess allies.

Unbeknownst to the Headless Horseman and his singing black zombie horse who was currently singing the lyrics “I wore raspberry beret” namely because the horse was wearing a raspberry beret making him look extremely ridiculous on this night before Halloween, Renfield was in a Bed and Breakfast in the town of Tewkesbury getting ready to begin his constituency MP re-election campaign.

The Headless Horseman was riding along without his pumpkin head because it had been blown off in a strong wind storm that had suddenly descended on the streets of central London.

As such, he did not see all the huge cubes of a mysterious scarlet red coloured ice that decorated the lawns of the Set estate.

And as for Buchephalus Reborn, he was so engrossed in his own singing as well as his raspberry beret slipping down over his equine eyes, the horse did not notice the mysterious scarlet red coloured ice cubes either.

The horse slipped on the ice cubes and fell sending his rider Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow soaring through the air and through the huge panoramic window of the Set Estate living room.

The billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set, who had been comfortably sitting in his arm chair holding a glass of very good Port wine in one hand and a copy of The Economist Magazine in the other, called out to his butler and valet, “Athelstan, I think you better immediately call the emergency number of the 24-hour window replacement service.”

“Very good, sir,” Athelstan walked over to the phone and proceeded to do just that.

“Nefertiti Galore,” Set called out to the estate’s watch cat with fierce claws, “Sic him.”

The Headless Horseman soon found himself attacked by the cat Nefertiti Galore and rushed back out the window.

Somehow he miraculously managed to get back on top of Bucephalus Reborn and horse and rider fled through the streets of London being diligently pursued by the ferocious claws of Set’s pet cat Nefertiti Galore.

Up above the skies of London, a ferocious looking Great Pumpkin shone down on top of them.

-A vampire novel chapter 
written by Christopher
Wednesday October 30th
2019.

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Renfield Begins Re-Election Campaign

October 29, 2019 at 10:37 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Renfield Begins Re-Election Campaign 

By a margin of 438 votes to 20, the British House of Commons voted to approve Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s date for a UK national election to be held this coming December 12th.

This would pave the way for Britain’s first December election since 1923.

Johnson said the British public must be given a choice over the future of “Brexit and the country”.

As the vote took place, British MP Renfield R. Renfield the UK’s Deputy Foreign Secretary In Charge of Geopolitical Intelligence Gathering sat on the benches eating a dozen Chick-fil-A chicken sandwiches that he pulled out of a large bag prominently displaying the Chick-fil-A logo.

He also wore a t-shirt showing Lot’s wife turning into a pillar of salt when she turned back to look on the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah.

The visual display at the moment of the historic vote lost him the endorsement of both Justin Trudeau and Barack Obama for his re-election campaign (not of course that Renfield was expecting their endorsements anyways).

Renfield also earned himself an excommunication from Pope Francis even though he wasn’t Catholic (but then again it could be argued neither was the Pope).

Renfield went home to the colossal West London mansion of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set where he lived while in London.

He noticed Set on the front lawn outside cutting up a large block of ice and what appeared to be a body inside the block of ice.

Renfield walked through the front door of the mansion where he informed his friend Amadeus Emanon that he would be renting a room in a Bed and Breakfast place in the town of Tewkesbury for the next couple of months as he fought his re-election campaign in his constituency of Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds.

Meanwhile London-based PIs Magog Rhys Petley and Agathor Christie were flying home from New York City to London.

They had just finished handing in a report to Lev Tomi the Secretary General of the UN Secretariat On The Environment and Climate Change on who were the groups and individuals responsible for starting the wild fires that raged through the Amazon rain forests this past summer.

Their investigation came to a sudden halt when they stumbled on a location where shaman priests and priestesses of Pachamama (who was the ancient Inca goddess of the earth and earthquakes) were sacrificing both llamas and humans to Pachamama.

Now that it looked like a UK general election would soon be held, the two private eyes mutually agreed to seek their old jobs as MPs.

For Agathor Christie who had been the British Conservative MP for Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds prior to the spring 2017 British election, this would mean defeating current British Transhumanist MP Renfield R. Renfield (who had beaten him back in spring 2017).

For Magog Rhys Petley who had been British Labour MP for the Welsh constituency of Newbridge prior to the spring 2017 election, this would mean defeating British Transhumanist MP Morgana Fay Lee who was a Welsh vampiress who had beaten him back in spring 2017.

The Welsh vampiress Morgana: the lovely little devil about to take on Welsh werewolf Magog Rhys Petley in the upcoming British general election.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday October 29th
2019.

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Jarvey Epwein and The Egyptian Vampire

October 28, 2019 at 10:46 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , )

Jarvey Epwein and The Egyptian Vampire

Billionaire Jarvey Epwein was a New York banker and investor as well as a financier behind the production of many Hollywood film blockbusters.

Not many people were aware of Jarvey Epwein’s existence.

Even fewer had Jarvey Epwein’s personal mobile phone number.

The London-based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set was one individual who did.

Epwein was surprised to get a phone call from the mysterious nocturnal Egyptian last night inviting him to come to London to partake of a major investment opportunity.

Epwein wasn’t one to rush to anyone’s beck and call.

But Jarvey Epwein knew that Set Enterprises through the research of its chief scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher was years ahead of anybody else when it came to genetics and DNA research.

If Epwein could get himself a slice of that pie, his already hefty bank accounts and profit margins would become even heftier (like Jabba the Hutt a long time ago in a galaxy far far away).

Tonight the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set was walking Jarvey Epwein through the Canary Wharf plant that was Set Enterprises laboratories.

“Well, I must say, Sol,” Epwein called the nocturnal Egyptian by his first name of which his full name was Sol Invictus Set, “I’m really impressed. But where is this Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster that I’ve heard the Rockefellers and the Rothschilds and George Soros raving about?”.

Set paused and blinked, “I wasn’t aware that the Rockefellers and Rothschilds and George Soros knew of Michelangelo’s existence.”

“It’s hard to find anything or anyone that their intelligence networks are not aware of,” Jarvey Epwein laughed as he sipped his own personal brand of cocktail that he called a Lolita, “or my intelligence networks for that matter.”

“I’m afraid Michelangelo is feeling a little under the weather this evening,” Set explained, “my personal concert pianist Amadeus Emanon took Michelangelo for a walk last night in the middle of the pouring rain and the poor lobster caught a cold. He’s currently wrapped in a waterproof warm blanket at the bottom of his aquarium floor. Dr. Cadbury Rocher is currently running a computer analysis to see if lemon flavoured Neo-Citran is at all detrimental to the health of psychic lobsters before we start serving him a glass before his regular bedtime.”

“I’m sorry that I won’t be able to meet Michelangelo then,” Jarvey Epwein sighed, “so Sol what did you want to talk to me about?”.

“Well,” Set rose to his full enormous fierce looking height, “you may have heard that last Wednesday a lorry carrying a refrigerator trailer was found in an industrial park in Grays, Essex, England. It contained the bodies of 39 migrants who had suffocated and froze to death in the refrigerator unit. You may have heard that my former employee Renfield R. Renfield (who used to be the Chief of Security and Intelligence Gathering For Set Enterprises) is now a British MP and a member of the British Cabinet. He was assigned by the government to oversee the investigation finding who was responsible for running the human trafficking and people smuggling ring responsible for these migrants’ tragic deaths. Anyways most of British Intelligence has been working overtime and even Set Enterprises’ forensic accounting department has been running checks. It would of course be ultimately difficult to prove in a court of law but this particular ring of human trafficking seems to be part of a larger network of rings that ultimately find themselves under the aegis of certain numbered holding companies. Anyhow the apex of the pyramid seems ultimately to be traced to you. There is a large part of your revenue that seems to be unaccounted for. But computer analytics at Set Enterprises shows part of that unaccounted revenue seems to fit in with the money being made by this one particular network of human trafficking rings of which one ring seems to be the one that overlooked the Essex lorry trafficking operation.”

“Like you say, Sol,” Epwein smiled and laughed, “it would all be difficult to prove in a court of law. Now stop wasting my time. Are you here to show me an investment opportunity or not? I’m not here to play child’s games concerning the deaths of a bunch of people.”

“I do have something to show you,” Set opened a door and waved Epwein into the room.

Epwein entered.

“It’s dark,” the billionaire banker, investor and film financier commented, “what is this place?”.

“It’s Set Enterprises’ refrigerator unit,” Set answered as he closed the door of the room with Epwein inside and he the nocturnal Egyptian outside.

He then locked the door.

No one heard Epwein’s screams that went on and on…

… until… they didn’t.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday October 28th
2019.

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A Glimpse of Jack O’ Hare

October 27, 2019 at 9:41 pm (Commentary) ()

A Glimpse of Jack O’ Hare

It had been a cold September and cold early October
So all the leaves had fallen off the trees early this year
Autumn was usually his favourite time of the year 
And it was the autumn colours of the leaves on the trees that made it so 
But this year it was autumn without leaves of colour

What is the day without the sun?
Or the night without the moon?
It would leave one with an empty feeling 
Such is the case with an autumn without leaves of colour 

Vivaldi’s Four Seasons suddenly reduced to three 
Oh, what a sad melody! 
Living in a city close to the mountains 
that created its own climate 
And often cast a chill on early autumn 

He had lived so many years in a northern woodlands city
Where the trees turned into coats of many colours 
And waved their garments of wonder to the sky
during days and nights of gentle autumn breeze

But he really had only 2 friends in that city 
His father
and a wild hare jack rabbit that lived in the back yard
His father died 
And he was forced to move out of the house
Leaving his only other friend to fend in the back yard for himself
Were the house’s new owners as kind to rabbits?

He moved to the West Coast
Only to discover that the West Coast was the playground of the very wealthy 
If you didn’t have vast wealth
you could only exist on the West Coast 
One could never really live

So home to his province he came
This time to the city in the south
The city where chinook winds blew cold in the autumn 
and slew the glory for which autumn is noted

Days and nights that were magical
were days and nights he encountered a jack rabbit
Because they reminded him of his friend Jack
He usually saw one or maybe even a few while walking across a field

A few nights ago
As the autumn chill raced through his bones 
He saw one in a parking lot of all places
Both human and hare stopped to look at one another
The hare decided this human was no threat to him
So seemingly it looked like the hare saluted him 
And then moved on

Like the proverbial two ships that pass in the night 
What tales might that jack rabbit have told?
What adventures have befallen him?

A glimpse of another Jack O’ Hare
But sometimes a glimpse of hope is all that’s needed.

-A poem written by Christopher
Sunday October 27th
2019.

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Pachamama, Pope Francis and A Tale of Two Parrots

October 26, 2019 at 10:54 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mythology, News, Religion, The Occult, The Supernatural, Theology, Vampire novel) (, , , )

Pachamama, Pope Francis and A Tale of Two Parrots

Pope Francis was addressing a group of bishops and cardinals at the final closing session of the Synod On The Pan-Amazonian Region being held at the Vatican.

On the floor in front of where the pontiff was speaking was a carved wooden statue of Pachamama who was worshipped as the Earth Mother goddess by various Amazon rainforest and Andean mountain tribespeople as well as by the ancient Inca culture.

Directly in front of Pope Francis on the table where he held his papers and spoke from them as he read was a set of green plants and flowers.

Among the plants and flowers were two parrots.

The parrot on Pope Francis’ right (the synod audience’s left) looked very much alive as he stood tall with his eyes wide open among the flowers and plants.

The parrot on Pope Francis’ left (the synod audience’s right) looked very much dead as he lay down among the flowers and plants with his mouth perpetually open and devoid of breath or sound.

The parrot on Pope Francis’ right looking very much alive and very much on the up and up was an Australian parrot looking perky and happy do to his daily diet of Uncle Ernie’s Secret Ingredient Laced Bird Seed that was mailed daily to him from Uncle Ernie’s Secret Location in Australia.

The parrot on Pope Francis’ left looking dead and very much departed from this world was a Norwegian blue parrot (a variety of parrot made famous by the British television show Monty Python).

The Norwegian blue parrot had died pining for the fjords what with all this talk of the Amazon region going on.

. . .

In the Bolivian capital of La Paz, Bolivian President Evo Morales was angry.

Not because people were in the streets protesting against his winning an unprecedented fourth presidential term but because Donald Trump had misspelled the Bolivian President’s name wrong in a tweet.

. . .

Meanwhile on the streets of Rome, an off duty member of the Swiss Guards was heading home late from work after a day spent guarding a set of Pachamama statues that had recently been rescued from the Tiber River.

Suddenly a sewer hole on the street suddenly blew its top and a huge flame of fire soared from the open sewer hole into the air.

In the midst of the huge flame of fire was a fierce looking dragon.

The dragon gazed ferociously and menacingly at the off duty Swiss Guard.

As for the Guardsman, he didn’t know what to think.

This could possibly be a hallucination brought on by imbibing too much of Pope Francis’ pet Australian parrot’s bird seed that he had swiped from the parrot’s bird seed dish when neither pontiff nor parrot were looking.

The dragon suddenly shapeshifted into a beautiful woman who approached him:

“Evening, Miss,” the Guardsman smiled as his sword rose to greet her.

The woman reached down the low-cut front of her dress, pulled out a knife and stabbed him.

She continued to walk down the street heading towards the Vatican.

The off-duty Guardsman dying decided to spend his last minutes on earth checking his lottery ticket.

He removed the lottery ticket from his coat pocket and his smart phone from his pants pocket and proceeded to google tonight’s winning lottery number for the grand prize of €10 million.

They matched.

“Unholy shit,” the Guardsman noted aloud with more than a huge trace of irony, “I win the lottery the same night I’m about to kick the bucket.”

He expired.

Fate can be cruel at times.

If a departed Norwegian blue parrot in the synod hall at the Vatican could talk, he’d undoubtedly agree.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday October 26th
2019.

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When So Very Few Words Can Say So Much

October 25, 2019 at 9:49 pm (Commentary, News, Personal essays, Tragedy) (, , )

When So Very Few Words Can Say So Much

On Wednesday October 23rd 2019, the bodies of 31 men and 8 women were found frozen to death in a refrigerator truck in an industrial estate in the town of Grays, Essex, England.

The 39 were migrants being brought into the United Kingdom by human traffickers.

One of those believed to have suffocated and frozen to death in the cramped tractor unit was Miss Pham Thi Tra My, 26, who was from Vietnam.

The family of Miss Tra My had paid £30,000 to people smugglers to get her into the United Kingdom.

The last they heard from her was on Tuesday night when they got a text message from her saying she couldn’t breathe.

This last message they received from her was on Tuesday night at 22:30 Greenwich Time two hours before the trailer arrived at the Purfleet terminal from Zeebrugge in Belgium.

Sometimes very few words can say so much.

The last words sent from Miss Tra My were:

“I am really, really sorry, Mom and Dad, my trip to a foreign land has failed.
I am dying. I can’t breathe. I love you very much, Mom and Dad. I am sorry, Mother.”

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Asmodeus In Rome On Saint Raphael’s Day

October 24, 2019 at 10:31 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Asmodeus In Rome On Saint Raphael’s Day 

The demon Asmodeus was sitting in a Rome taverna and enjoying a glass of absinthe with the little green frog Nimrod (who had been a mighty hunter back in the day of the Old Testament Book of Genesis).

The TV in the taverna was on and the news was being read,

“In Britain, Renfield R. Renfield the UK’s Deputy Foreign Secretary In Charge of Geopolitical Intelligence Gathering has been placed in charge of the investigation to find the human trafficking gang responsible for the deaths of 39 migrants who had been found frozen to death in a refrigerator truck that was parked in an industrial area in Essex…”

“I wonder what will happen to the human traffickers when Renfield gets his hands on them?” Nimrod asked.

“I imagine from what I’ve heard of Renfield’s reputation,” Asmodeus lit his 10,000th cigarette of the day, “they will die a slow painful death by bodily dismemberment.”

“I suppose that’s why Renfield is considered the inspiration for the character of Raymond Red Reddington on The Blacklist TV show,” Nimrod licked up absinthe from his glass with his long tongue.

“I imagine,” Asmodeus agreed as he sipped his absinthe.

“In other news,” the announcer on the TV went on, “Pope Francis dove into the Tiber River today when he spotted what he thought were Pachamama idols floating by. The idols had been thrown off the bridge into the Tiber River on Monday…”

“I wonder if Pope Francis knows how to swim,” Nimrod finished his absinthe.

“Don’t know,” Asmodeus shrugged as he motioned for the waiter to bring another couple of glasses of absinthe.

A girl walked by the window wearing a Saint Raphael medal around her neck.

“Great balls of fire,” Asmodeus turned pale and made a reverse Sign of the Cross.

“What is it?” Nimrod inquired.

“That woman was wearing a Saint Raphael medal,” Asmodeus answered.

“Si, signor,” the waiter said as he put down the glasses of absinthe, “today is Saint Raphael’s Day on the old Roman Rite Latin calendar.”

“What have you got against Saint Raphael?” Nimrod asked Asmodeus when the waiter departed.

“Well over 2 millennia and a half ago, when I had the hots for a young Hebrew maiden named Sarah so much so that I murdered 7 of her husbands on the night their marriages to her were supposed to be consummated,” Asmodeus explained, “The Archangel Raphael befriended a young Hebrew man named Tobias and helped him get engaged to Sarah. The awful smell of a fish’s liver and heart being burnt and its fumes drove me away when I tried to attack Tobias on their wedding night. The smell was so bad, I fled from Media (where Sarah lived) all the way to Upper Egypt where Raphael followed me, bound me and buried me. I lay bound and buried for several centuries until an intoxicated Irish leprechaun named Yaldabaoth accidentally released me while he was visiting his mother Sophia in Egypt.”

“I can see why you’re not very happy with Raphael,” Nimrod nodded.

Meanwhile in another part of Rome, the Greek goddess Artemis rang the doorbell of a Vatican Cardinal’s apartment.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday October 24th
2019.

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Hillary Clinton’s Neo-McCarthyism and Russian Assets Under Every Mattress

October 23, 2019 at 10:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Hillary Clinton’s Neo-McCarthyism and Russian Assets Under Every Mattress

Former U.S. President Bill Clinton was at his laptop in his living room looking at the website Nubile Young Babes when he suddenly noticed his wife former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton flying in on her broomstick out the window.

Bill quickly moved over to the New York Times website where he pretended to be highly engrossed in an article on geothermal engineering and technology.

“How did all your TV interviews go today, dear?” Bill asked Hillary as she came strolling through the door with her broomstick.

“Wonderful,” Hillary smiled as she removed toads and snakes out of her boots, “I had a blast telling everyone that Tulsi Gabbard was a Russian asset.”

“Good for you, dear,” Bill commented as he tried to visualize what Tulsi Gabbard would look like in a blue dress.

“Even BBC interviewed me,” Hillary turned on the TV by wrinkling her nose instead of using the remote, “I wonder if that interview is on yet.”

Hillary wrinkled her nose again and the channel switched to BBC World News.

Rather than Hillary, it was British MP Renfield R. Renfield the UK’s Deputy Foreign Secretary In Charge of Geopolitical Intelligence Gathering being interviewed.

“Moving across the pond to the question of U.S. politics, Mr. Renfield,” the interviewer inquired, “Why do you think Hillary Clinton has it in for Hawaii Rep. Tulsi Gabbard and is calling her a Russian asset?”.

“Because Tulsi who has actually fought in a war unlike Hillary or her husband Bill,” Renfield replied, “knows that going into war is no laughing matter.”

Hillary cackled at Renfield’s response.

“And of course Hillary is part of the perpetual regime change war machine that dominates Washington D.C. in both parties Republican and Democrat,” Renfield went on, “and Tulsi wants to end this insane U.S. policy of perpetual war. Better to spend the U.S. budget on programs that benefit the American people such as better health care and education.”

“What hogwash!” Hillary commented as she bathed her pet pig Beelzebub in a tub of water.

“But still Tulsi is not that high up in the poll ratings is she?” The BBC interviewer asked, “Why would Hillary consider the representative from Hawaii a threat to Washington DC’s perpetual regime change war machine?”.

“Well of course the polls that the establishment media such as CNN, The New York Times and The Washington Post drone on and on about show Tulsi not doing well,” Renfield agreed, “but one of the very few areas where I’m actually in agreement with Donald Trump is in referring to these establishment media outlets as fake news. Those polls that show Tulsi doing well they ignore as does the DNC (Democratic National Commitee). This past summer after the debate in which Tulsi Gabbard ko’d Kamala Harris out of the U.S. Democratic Presidential race, many polls showed up putting Tulsi Gabbard in first place. So of course the establishment media ignored those polls and the DNC immediately changed the rules of which polls they follow to decide who’d participate in the next round of presidential debates. They didn’t want the Establishment’s preferred candidate Sen. Elizabeth Warren to be ko’d by Tulsi Gabbard so they kept Tulsi out of the next rounds of debates save of course this last one which Tulsi had considered boycotting because of the DNC’s manipulations.”

“So in your opinion, Elizabeth Warren is the Democratic Party establishment’s preferred candidate?” The interviewer asked.

“Yes, Sen. Elizabeth Warren whom Trump once referred to as Pocahontas,” Renfield nodded, “Speaking of which just the other day I happened to run into the ghost of Captain John Smith who’s on temporary dispensational leave from Purgatory. And Captain John Smith’s ghost addressing this very subject said, “I knew Pocahontas. I was a friend of Pocahontas. Sen. Elizabeth Warren is no Pocahontas.” So there’s a different perspective for you.”

The BBC interviewer helped himself to a stiff shot of whisky after Renfield’s last remark and continued, “And you think Tulsi is still doing well in other polls? And this is why Secretary Clinton is attacking her and calling her a Russian asset?”.

“I do,” Renfield nodded again, “You have to understand that there’s really only one political party in the United States of America. A political party that I call the Perpetual War, Sleaze, Corruption and Pedophilia Party. And this Perpetual War, Sleaze, Corruption and Pedophilia Party happens to be made up of two wings. A left wing called the Democrats. And a right wing called the Republicans. But it’s all devoted to one and the same cause- promoting perpetual war, sleaze, corruption and pedophilia. And the good warmongering Hillary Clinton will attack anybody who stands outside that cause such as Tulsi Gabbard.”

Hillary coughed up numerous flies and locusts with scorpion tails at Renfield’s last remark, “That Renfield must be a Russian asset himself. Where does he get off saying that there really is only one political party in the U.S. the Perpetual War, Sleaze, Corruption and Pedophilia Party?”.

“I have no idea, dear,” Bill answered who was thinking about the numerous times he had flown down to Florida with Jeffrey Epstein on his private plane.

“I’m so angry, I’m going to order myself a pizza,” Hillary picked up her mobile phone and phoned a pizza place that was noted for not making very good pizza.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday October 23rd
2019.

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Canadian Election Night and The Osiris-Pachamama Alliance

October 22, 2019 at 10:53 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Canadian Election Night and The Osiris-Pachamama Alliance

It was election night in Canada and Canadian New Democratic Party leader Jagmeet Singh had just finished his election speech.

Set Enterprises’ secret agent Harvey Tallbanger watched the speech on the large screen at Canadian Federal Liberal Party headquarters where Justin Trudeau was expected to put in an appearance in another 20 minutes to half an hour.

Trudeau had won the election albeit with a minority government.

Next up to speak was Canadian Conservative Party leader Andrew Scheer of Regina.

The leader of the Official Opposition.

As political convention dictated in Canada, Scheer as leader of the party having won the 2nd greatest number of seats in Parliament on Election Night would give his speech which would then be followed by Trudeau who won the greatest number of seats.

However 35 seconds into Scheer’s speech, the classless Justin Trudeau walked on stage and began his speech causing national television networks to immediately switch over from Scheer to the newly re-elected Prime Minister.

Never had such a protocol been broken before.

But it was typical of spoiled brat Justin Trudeau who seemed to have people outside Canada so totally mesmerized that even Barack Obama had endorsed the spoiled brat for Prime Minister.

Justin’s treatment of Scheer was so typical of all politicians from Quebec and their treatment of and total disdain for politicians who came from the Canadian prairie provinces.

Ever since the days of Justin’s pompous arrogant father Pierre Elliot Trudeau, it had been the attitude of all politicians from Quebec to treat the electorate and people of the Canadian prairie provinces with loathing and contempt.

Robbing the prairie provinces of their resource wealth so they could buy votes in their native province of Quebec.

Even Brian Mulroney who had been a Progressive Conservative and not a Liberal, being a politician from Quebec, he naturally treated the people of the Canadian prairie provinces with disdain.

In some ways Mulroney had been even a bigger asshole towards the people of the Canadian prairie provinces than Pierre Elliot Trudeau had been.

And now Justin was following in the footsteps of his father and all recent politicians from Quebec.

The following morning the Alberta independence website Westxit (which had 2000 likes by the time of Election Day) suddenly climbed overnight to 200,000 likes after Justin Trudeau had metaphorically shit over the people of the Canadian prairie provinces.

When Justin Trudeau had finished his speech, he walked off stage where he immediately had a cream pie thrown in his face by Harvey Tallbanger.

. . .

The Egyptian god Osiris was pleased by recent happenings at the Vatican and throughout Europe.

Osiris had in the past year formed an alliance with the Amazon rainforest and Andean Mountain indigenous earth mother goddess Pachamama.

Pachamama, unlike her earth mother goddess equivalents in the Ancient Greek and Egyptian pantheons, was an earth mother goddess who required blood sacrifices.

Most of the time, it was poor llamas and poor little guinea pigs who were sacrificed to Pachamama by her priests and priestesses.

Pachamama definitely wasn’t a member of GETA (Goddesses For The Ethical Treatment of Animals).

On occasion, she also required human sacrifice.

But that was no big deal, Osiris thought.

So did most liberal progressive Democratic governors of U.S. states.

And Osiris’ good friend Pope Francis had started off this month’s Pan-Amazonia Synod at the Vatican by having an Amazon female shaman lead an outdoor ritual in the Vatican gardens in which everybody bowed down to idols of Pachamama.

Afterwards the idols of Pachamama were then put in front of an altar in the Catholic Church of Santa Maria del Traspontina.

This past Sunday October 21st a group of Amazon Synod leaders led by the pro-Communist Brazilian Cardinal Claudio Hummes held a ceremony in the Catacombs of Domitilla in which they re-enacted the signing of the Pact of the Catacombs.

The Pact of the Catacombs was a ceremony held by pro-Marxist Cardinals, bishops and priests back on November 16th 1965 towards the end of the 2nd Vatican Council in which they pledged loyalty to the spirit of revolution.

Now that pact would be renewed and Pachamama (who lived beneath the earth as a dragon bathed in fire and who shapeshifted into a woman above the earth) would then be accepted as the spirit of the coming revolution.

The Pact of The Catacombs was renewed by the Amazon Synod leaders.

A day later, a group of traditional Catholics entered the Church of Santa Maria del Traspontina, removed 5 Pachamama idols and then took them outside and cast them into the Tiber River.

Claudio Cardinal Hummes threw a hippy hissy fit in response.

But for now Osiris was happy.

He was sure that he would soon become the Pharaoh of Europe after a papally blessed inter-religious ceremony would be held on the border between Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland this coming Halloween that would forever bind the United Kingdom of Great Britain to the coming United States of Europe (foreseen and talked about by Leon Trotsky back in 1935) of which he Osiris would be the Pharaoh.

After all it looked like Boris Johnson and that odious Renfield R. Renfield’s efforts to pull Britain out of the EU before Halloween night would be a failure.

Osiris smiled.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday October 22nd
2019.

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