Don Quixote and The Fountain of Youth

November 4, 2019 at 11:47 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Literature, Mythology, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Don Quixote and The Fountain of Youth

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was temporarily back in London from the town of Tewkesbury.

Renfield was in the process of setting up his campaign re-election headquarters in Tewkesbury.

However he was back in London to attend the final session of this current Westminster Parliament to elect a new Speaker of the House of Commons to succeed John Bercow who was retiring as Speaker.

After Sir Lindsay Hoyle was elected the new Speaker, Renfield went to The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London where he had been invited to see a painting that the gallery had recently acquired.

Upon Renfield’s arrival, Dashwood Forrest showed him the new painting:

“What’s the painting called?” Renfield asked Forrest.

“It’s called Don Quixote Kisses Dulcinea del Toboso,” Forrest answered.

“Really?” Renfield accepted a piece of shrimp offered him by one of the catering waiters, “I must say Don Quixote looks rather young in that painting and not the old fogey depicted in Cervantes’ novel.”

“There’s an interesting story to that painting,” Forrest accepted a vegan hot dog from another waiter, “this painting was actually painted in 19th Century Mexico. According to the artist’s notebook, he actually met the young looking Don Quixote and the young looking Dulcinea del Toboso. Quixote, said the artist, did not die after recovering his sanity and renouncing his ideals of knightly chivalry like Cervantes said at the end of his work. Instead Quixote sailed to the New World and went to Florida where he discovered the Fountain of Youth. He drank from it and became young again. He returned to Spain and brought Dulcinea del Toboso to the New World and to Florida where she too drank from the Fountain of Youth. She too became eternally young. The couple then moved to Mexico where they were living when the artist painted this picture.”

“So according to the painter of this picture,” Renfield helped himself to a whisky, “Don Quixote was a real person and not a figment of Cervantes’ imagination.”

“That is so,” Forrest nodded.

“I wonder where the Fountain of Youth is located,” Renfield looked intently at the painting.

. . .

“I see you got yourself a new dog in Florida to replace Caesar,” Donald Trump remarked to one of his secret service bodyguards named Schneider.

“This is Caesar,” Schneider petted the young pup.

“Nonsense, Caesar looked to be on his last legs when he was here in this office,” Trump remarked, “he was 12 years old and dying. And you said you were taking him to Florida on one last holiday before he went off on his final journey.”

“I was,” Schneider said, “But when I took him for a walk down there, he found a spring and drank from it. And now he looks like this.”

“Where is this spring?” Trump demanded to know.

“I’ve forgotten,” Schneider lied knowing what sort of man he was dealing with in Trump.

-A vampire novel chapterΒ 
written by Christopher
Monday November 4thΒ 


  1. David Redpath said,

    Now that you mention it, Chris,
    Uncle Ernie does keep heading off
    to the Yucatan region of Mexico.
    He says it’s to get refills of his
    herbal hair tonic. He does have a
    particularly full mane for an old
    burnt out hippy. With not a single
    grey hair, come to mention it πŸ€”
    I have no idea how old he actually
    is. We always assumed his trips
    to Mexico were cocaine related,
    as the Disciples of Santa Muerte
    have turned out to be unreliable
    suppliers just recently 😎

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, the Disciples of Santa Muerte seemed to have suddenly left the import/export business for some reason. 😎

      So Uncle Ernie has a full mane of hair and not a single gray hair.

      It appears Uncle Ernie has boldly gone where Don Quixote has gone before. πŸ›‘πŸŽ

      • David Redpath said,

        He does seem to be eternally
        searching for youth. I keep
        telling him that it only gets him
        in trouble πŸ™„

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, look what constantly searching for youth did to Jeffrey Epstein. πŸ’€

  2. David Redpath said,

    When Uncle Ernie said he was going
    to Mexico to, “… get a leg over.”
    I thought he was talking about that
    “big beautiful wall.” πŸ€”
    I had mentioned that due to an
    unsavoury incident in New York’s
    Time Square, Uncle Ernie can no
    ionger get a US visa.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes you mentioned that unsavoury incident in Times Square that led to the loss of Uncle Ernie’s U.S. visa.

      No doubt if the ghost of Charles Dickens πŸ‘» had witnessed that incident, he’d have described it as “The best of Times, the worst of Times.”

      • David Redpath said,

        Yes, Charles Dickens
        was no square 😎
        But Uncle Ernie, being a philistine,
        thinks ‘Dickensian’ is a Karma Sutra
        position πŸ€”

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        It was no doubt engaging in that Dickensian position in the middle of Times Square that cost Uncle Ernie his U.S. visa.

  3. David Redpath said,

    Uncle Ernie has been very busy
    practising a new one. He calls it
    “The Impeachable” . Apparently
    it’s a solo position you get into
    all by yourselfπŸ‘Œon shaky ground,
    and without a leg to stand on πŸ€Έβ€β™‚οΈ

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Sounds like Uncle Ernie could easily be Donald Trump’s yoga instructor. πŸ™…πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ

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