The Sad Death of Inca Vampiress Huchuysisa

January 15, 2020 at 11:59 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The Sad Death of Inca Vampiress Huchuysisa

Inca vampiress Huchuysisa

The entire Russian government resigned today after Russian President Vladimir Putin announced sweeping new constitutional changes.

No one was quite sure what these new constitutional changes would mean.

Members of the British tabloid press decided to ask British MP Renfield R. Renfield about it (even though those same reporters of the tabloid press had been recently given quite literally a black eye from the MP for their treatment of Meghan the Duchess of Sussex).

Renfield answering their questions said, “Putin is trying to find a new means for keeping himself in power for ever. He’s been contacting Dr. Cadbury Rocher at Set Enterprises to see if Dr. Rocher can find a way of uploading Putin’s consciousness into the body of a young, handsome and virile Siberian male fashion model who apparently accidentally discovered the Fountain of Youth while vacationing in Florida, drank from there and then forgot about its location when the GPS app on his phone was hacked by a North Korean pizza delivery service. Coincidentally Dr. Rocher has also been getting inquiries from a jailbird in Australia nicknamed Uncle Ernie who also wants his consciousness uploaded into the same body of the same young, handsome and virile male Siberian fashion model.”

. . .

“Lexington!” Donald Trump bellowed for his British butler and valet from his bed in the Presidential bedroom.

“You screamed, sire?” Lexington inquired as he opened the bedroom drawer.

Lexington was forced to start calling Trump “sire” as well as “your Imperial Majesty” as the Donald intended to crown himself Neo-Roman Emperor of America at some point in the near future.

“The ghost of Gen. Qasem Soleimani was at the foot of my bed,” Trump’s toupee had turned ghostly white, “He pointed a finger at me and spoke these words ‘Soon. Soon. Soon.’ What did he mean by that?”.

“Maybe he means vengeance for his death is coming soon, your Imperial Majesty,” Lexington answered.

“Well, those words are hardly going to help me get back to sleep,” Trump bawled.

“All right,” Lexington consoled, “Maybe Soleimani had to take a number from the ticket machine in Paradise and what he means by ‘Soon’ is that soon he’ll be experiencing the first of the 72 dark-eyed houri (virgin damsels) that are promised him.”

“Soleimani gets 72 dark eyed virgins?” Trump was shocked.

Outside in the hallway, the White House janitor was singing the old 1980s Rod Stewart song, “Some guys have all the luck…”

. . .

Peter Whitstable the Fox Mulder of Interpol had been called in by the government of Peru to investigate the mysterious death of the young Inca vampiress Huchuysisa.

She had apparently been captured and burnt to death and videos of her fiery death had been posted to YouTube.

Whitstable traced the account as belonging to the demons Baal and Baphomet.

After talking with a professor of vampirology and demonology at Oxford University, Whitstable discovered the vampiress’ murder was probably linked to a desire to allow a demon’s client (who had sold their soul to the demon for a certain number of years) to be extended beyond the date of the soul contract’s expiration.

Occasionally a demon may find a client so suitable to fulfilling their own personal demonic agenda that they would like the client to live a while longer and not have their soul sent to Tartarus on a particular date like the original Hell drawn up contract stipulates.

The only out for a contract to be renewed, was for the demon or demons (if there was more than one) to whom the mortal sold their soul, was for the demons to find a young vampiress (who had been a vampiress less than a year) and burn her body to ashes.

Then the contract could be renewed for another set period of time and the soul could continue to live on Earth a bit longer.

Huchuysisa a promising young Inca fashion model had been diagnosed with terminal cancer last year.

The Cuban vampiress Dolly Castro had turned Huchuysisa into a vampiress at the young fashion model’s request.

And now the young vampiress’ nocturnal fashion career had come to an end with her fiery death at the claws of the demons Baal and Baphomet.

After some checking around, Whitstable had discovered that the Inca vampiress had been killed 7 days before U.S. Supreme Court Associate Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg had announced that she was now cancer free.

This all started to make sense now.

Ginsburg had been promoting a Baal and Baphomet approved judicial agenda ever since Bill Clinton had named her to the U.S. Supreme Court back in 1993.

No doubt the demons wanted to see Ginsburg on the Supreme Court promoting their agenda for a lot longer.

She had to die so that Ruth Bader Ginsburg might live:

The Inca Vampiress Huchuysisa

-A vampire novel chapterΒ 
written by Christopher
Wednesday January 15th


  1. David Redpath said,

    Uncle Ernie seems to have
    a geriatric predisposition
    for models πŸ€” As he does
    keeps a blow up model,
    he’s named ‘Sacha Distel’,
    under his bed. Sometimes,
    late at night, you can hear
    him singing …

    “🎢 You talk like Marlene Dietrich
    And you dance like Zizi Jeanmaire
    Your clothes are all made by Balmain
    And there’s diamonds and pearls
    in your hair, yes, there are
    You live in a fancy apartment
    Off the Boulevard St. Michel
    Where you keep your
    Rolling Stones records
    And you’re my blow up friend,
    Sacha Distel, yes, you are
    But where do you go to, my lovely
    When you’re alone
    under my bed?
    Tell me the thoughts that surround you
    I want to look inside your head, yes, I do
    I’ve seen all your qualifications
    You got from the Sorbonne
    And the painting you stole from Picasso
    Your loveliness goes on and on, yes, it does
    When you go on your summer vacation
    You go to Juan-les-Pins
    With your carefully designed topless swimsuit
    You get an even suntan on your back, and on your plastic legs
    And when the snow falls
    you’re found in St. Moritz
    With the others of the jet set
    And you sip your Napoleon brandy
    But you never get your lips wet, no, you don’t
    But where do you go to, my lovely
    When you’re alone
    under my bed?
    Won’t you tell me the thoughts
    that surround you?
    I want to look inside your head,
    yes, I do
    Your name is heard in high places
    You know the Aga Khan
    He sent you a race horse for Christmas
    And you keep it just for fun,
    for a laugh, ha-ha-ha-ha
    They say that when you get married
    It’ll be to a millionaire
    But they don’t realize
    that your just plastic and rubber
    And I wonder if they really care,
    or give a damn
    Where do you go to, my lovely
    When you’re alone
    under my bed?
    Tell me the thoughts that surround you
    I want to look inside your head, yes, I do
    I remember the back streets of Naples
    An inflatable lover
    deflated in a brown paper bag
    touched with a burning ambition
    To shake off it’s lowly-price tag
    On sale
    So look into my face, Sacha Distel
    And remember just what you are
    Then go and forget me forever
    But I know you still bear the scar
    of my puncture deep inside
    that no patch could ever repair
    I know where you go to, my lovely
    When you’re alone
    under my your bed
    I know the thoughts that surround you
    ‘Cause I can look inside your head 🎢”

    He really is an old romantic
    at heart, dear old Uncle Ernie πŸ˜ͺ

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,


      A song that sums up the late 20th and early 21st Centuries so well.

      Too bad so many of the original Beach Boys are dead.

      They could record Uncle Ernie’s Lament For A Sex Doll and turn it into a #1 hit.

      • David Redpath said,

        On Uncle Ernie’s water bed of dread
        the surf always seems to be up 🌊
        You can hear those good vibrations
        all the way to the Hawaiian Islands 🏝️

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        That reminds me of the time I attended my godmother’s 25th wedding anniversary party.

        Before the party, they had gone to Hawaii for a 2nd honeymoon.

        While they were there, in the middle of the night, a volcanic eruption happened nearby.

        Eric (my godmother’s husband) told the story later at the party.

        My godmother Georgie woke up and said, “Eric, what’s all that noise and commotion?”.

        And Eric replied, “It’s all right, honey. I’ve finally come.”

      • David Redpath said,

        After 25 years of marriage,
        it wouldn’t be uncommon
        for that to happen while the
        wife naps, oblivious to any
        nearby explosions πŸŒ‹

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Very true.

  2. majaalifee said,

    nice 🌸

  3. David Redpath said,

    β€œA starving child is a frightful sight. A starving vampire, even worse.”
    ~ Anne Rice

    I am truly sorry to hear of the immolation
    of the Inca Vampiress Huchuysisa.
    Such a waste of one so young, and
    obviously gifted with the power to
    deny the force of gravity. ‘Tis such
    a tragedy, like a dagger to the breast.

  4. Hyperion said,

    Such hilarious hi-jinx from world leaders is the stuff of comedic dreams. The ghost of Squashy Salamiman haunting the GOO was snort laugh material. I do mourn the loss of such a firm and perky vampiress. Dang, the sacrifices needed to keep evil up and running smoothly on the planet is sometimes unbearable.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks very much, Daniel.

      Yes, I 100% agree that the sacrifices needed to keep evil up and running on the planet is unbearable.

      Of course the Washington Post, New York Times, CNN, MNBC, CBC, BBC, Hollywood, the music industry and much of the U.S. Democratic Party do not agree.

      Neither for that matter does Pope Francis.

      • Hyperion said,

        We are set upon by the sulphuric smell of libertine false narratives in a culture predicated on two things; hook-ups and bullying by any method with intent to do great harm to anyone that doesn’t subscribe to illogical and harmful acts of moral turpitude.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes in a land where AOC’s vibrator plays The Internationale as it is being charged, Nancy Pelosi is busy scratching her head and thinking of that old TV show Name That Tune for some reason and South Bend Indiana Mayor Pete Buttigieg is bending over receiving a very unique apostolic blessing from Washington DC’s Msgr.Walter Rossi.

      • Hyperion said,

        Waaa haaaa haaaa! There is no doubt you have seen into the shadow world of politics and politicians.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, as Orson Welles said when he played The Shadow on old time 1930s radio, “Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men (and presumably women and transgenders as well)? The Shadow knows.”

      • Hyperion said,

        We definitely need Set Enterprise and Sherrielock Holmes to root out the evil in government once and for all. We we will all know who the naughty ones are by their glowing cheeks and always standing at the bar guzzling Bloody Mary’s.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        It will end up looking like a joint convention of the U.S. Democratic and Republican Parties.

      • Hyperion said,

        Except the new Sergeant at Arms, Sherrielock Holmes will be handing out discipline, 30 whacks to the buns, for every ninny and nincompoop She sees. The people will rise up in popular support of Pan Goatee as Czar for feminine esthetics, Renfield as the new President with his cabinet of vampiresses, and Michelangelo as Vice President keeping Renfield fully Informed of the world geopolitical situation through his prescient insights. I think Amadeus could be the Secretary of Commerce and return our poisoned food supply back to healthy consumption for all Americans. And then there is Secretary of State, Panty Goatee keeping world leaders focused on her admirable assets instead of conflict and world war mongering. But I think the cunning and wit of Dracul Van Helsing is needed for Secretary of Defense. I can envision evil doers receiving a missile envoy to discuss heated concepts even while they sit on their porcelain thrones grunting out a new edict for their minions.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I think that’s an excellent idea for a new cabinet, Daniel. πŸ‘ŒπŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»

      • Hyperion said,

        My hope is on Set Enterprises. I don’t think Governor Buttercake will beat out Pocahontas which will make Bernie and his sidekick AOC a shoe in for the nomination.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        At least the election campaign won’t be dull.

        Particularly if AOC’s vibrator starts going off in the middle of a campaign rally.

        I know what the lead headline news story for that day will be.

      • Hyperion said,

        AOC is all the buzz on Capitol Hill.

  5. Anonymole said,

    Your neighbor lady?

  6. Chef V. said,


  7. Sabiscuit said,

    Must know where you find your models and why the photos are so small.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      I find the photos at various sites and download them to my iPhone or tablet.

      Usually the photos appear quite large on my tablet but when I upload them to WordPress, they always become small for some reason.

      • Sabiscuit said,

        I have the opposite problem. They tend to expand when I link from my photo sharing account, so I have to tweak the sizes before publishing. I thought the young ladies were friends of yours.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Sadly not.

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