Qonzilqointec Takes In Carmen At The Royal Opera House
Qonzilqointec Takes In Carmen At The Royal Opera House
The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec was in London.
She was to meet her date Dracul Van Helsing this evening to attend the Royal Opera House performance of Georges Bizet’s Carmen.
Interestingly enough, the Bavarian and Austro-Hungarian goat demon Krampus (who had been down in Cornwall visiting his father’s grave) had had tickets to attend this evening’s performance of Carmen.
But at the last minute, the goat demon had come down with a severe allergy to the melody and tune of the song Habanera that Carmen sings in Act 1.
And that was his favourite part of the whole opera so Krampus was unable to attend.
He left his ticket at the box office so some last minute person could buy it.
The ticket was purchased by Dr. Cadbury Rocher who had just finished his final touches on the cannabis pot smoking cactus plant Magical Mystery Tour that was to be delivered to Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau in Ottawa.
Qonzilqointec and Dracul talked to Dr. Rocher in the lobby prior to curtain call.
They discussed the Iowa caucus which turned out to be a public relations disaster for the U.S. Democratic Party.
The app that was supposed to give the results to the State Committee had failed.
“I was just talking to Renfield about this,” Dr. Rocher said to the Aztec vampiress and Van Helsing referring to the British MP who served on the UK House of Commons Intelligence and Foreign Affairs Committee, “and he’s already determined what happened. Apparently the app was hacked by the billionaire Egyptian vampire Set’s pet cat Nefertiti Galore, Boris Johnson’s pet Jack Russell-cross dog Dilyn and a couple of Her Majesty the Queen’s Welsh corgis.”
“Who did the Iowa Democrats get to develop this app for them?” Dracul inquired.
“Apparently some nutty Australian who calls himself Uncle Ernie,” Rocher replied, “who interestingly enough was arrested at London’s Heathrow Airport yesterday for trying to enter the country illegally. To say nothing of showing up at airport Customs in the nude.”
The Royal Opera House announcer announced that this evening’s performance would start in 5 minutes.
The three headed into the auditorium to take their seats.
Krampus who was listening to the performance on the radio while taking a bath in his hotel room broke into a severe case of hives when the lead female singer playing Carmen started singing Habanera.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday February 4th
2020
Dracul Van Helsing 
David Redpath said,
February 6, 2020 at 3:38 am
You have to make allowances
for poor Uncle Ernie. He’s so
accustomed, whenever going
through customs, to getting
the rubbed glove treatment.
So, to save all the sniffer dog,
and bureaucratic foreplay, Uncle
Ernie arrives ready and willing.
A bit too willing, I think. Anyway,
he’s managed to catch up with his
old Aussie mate, Julian Assange,
whilst locked up. Julian taught
Uncle Ernie everything he knows
about IT. And that’s not saying
much.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 6, 2020 at 4:47 am
This indeed solves the mystery of the Iowa Democratic Party caucus app. 🤔
David Redpath said,
February 6, 2020 at 6:08 pm
Yes, the whole world was holding
it’s breath to know which Democrat
geriatric would likely take on Trump.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 6, 2020 at 10:12 pm
At one time, they were put into retirement homes.
Today they’re seeking the White House.
David Redpath said,
February 6, 2020 at 11:03 pm
Trump must be pissing
his adult diapers 😁
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 7, 2020 at 12:28 am
Yes, he’ll soon be switching over to Pampers.
David Redpath said,
February 7, 2020 at 2:43 am
If only they were as leak proof as
Trump’s White House staff 🙊🙈🙉
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 7, 2020 at 3:21 am
Nixon’s ghost will have to bring in the ghosts of the White House plumbers.
Jessica said,
February 6, 2020 at 9:37 pm
This was a fun read! I have this guilt for hating Mr. Van Helsing, but that vanished at the reminder of Uncle Ernie 😂
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 6, 2020 at 10:15 pm
Yes, Uncle Ernie is always finding himself in a mess of some sort or other. 😂
nitinsingh said,
February 12, 2020 at 4:07 am
😄😄🙂🙃