Napoleon Bonaparte and Maria Orsic In The Elysian Fields

February 13, 2020 at 11:59 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , )

Napoleon Bonaparte and Maria Orsic In The Elysian Fields

Napoleon Bonaparte aka Emperor Napoleon I of the French was walking through the Elysian Fields.

Persephone, who had some sympathy for the Little Corporal from Corsica, had persuaded her husband Hades to allow this.

Napoleon had spent a great deal of time roasting away on a spit in Purgatory until the foul crimes done in his days of nature were burnt and purged away.

Various gods and demons had debated what should be done with Napoleon. Was he a hero? Was he a scoundrel?

Trouble was he was a mixture of both. Hence the reason for the debate on his destination.

Come Judgement Day at the end of the world, Napoleon’s fate would ultimately be decided by Jesus Christ The Lord, Creator and King of the Cosmos.

Until that day, his locale was a subject of intense debate.

Unlike Lenin and Stalin who were busy roasting away in Tartarus the deepest and most fiery part of Hades/Sheol.

Odin had offered Napoleon a seat at a table in Valhalla even though the Emperor hadn’t died in battle but had died from eating a poisoned fish on the island of Saint Helena.

However the Germanic warriors, heroes and kings in the hall couldn’t stand the thought of a Frenchman being in their midst so they had raised vigorous objections (the Norse warriors and heroes in the hall were still trying to recover from having eaten Loki’s lutefisk recipe so they had no opinion on the subject one way or the other).

Odin did try to point out that Napoleon’s ancestral background was in fact Italian as Corsica (the island of his birth) had been ruled by Italian states until the Genoese ceded Corsica to the French King Louis XV in 1768.

However the Germans were having none of that.

And so Persephone had arranged for Napoleon to walk through the Elysian Fields.

It was while walking through the Elysian Fields that Napoleon had happened to run into Maria Orsic.

The immortal Austro-Croatian German medium had been sleep walking and had almost fallen into a River.

Napoleon had called out to the gods for help but they were currently on a lunch, beer, mead and wine break.

The French Emperor managed to bring Maria Orsic back to consciousness by reciting the Ave Maria in Latin.

A Vatican II cardinal roasting away on his barbecue spit not far away objected strenuously.

Maria came to and found herself in the arms of Napoleon.

Maria Orsic was a famous medium who later became the leader of the German Vril Society.

She was born on October 31st 1895 in Zagreb, Croatia.

Her father was Croatian and her mother was an Austrian from Vienna.

Her father Tomislav Orsic was an architect who worked in Zagreb.

During a trip to Vienna in 1894,
Tomislav met a beautiful young ballerina named Sabine.

They fell in love and married shortly after.

Their daughter Maria was born a year later.

Maria moved to Munich Bavaria in 1919.

That same year she founded the Vril Society along with a group of 8 other beautiful women who kept their hair very long.

They believed their long hair acted as cosmic antennae to receive communication from aliens on other worlds.

A group of demons (at the urging of Mephistopheles) had appeared to Maria and claimed to be Aryan aliens living on Alpha Centauri in the Aldebaran system.

They claimed to have visited Earth in the past and settled in Sumeria and the word Vril was formed from the ancient Sumerian word Vri-iL (meaning “like god” or “god like”).

The mediums passed secrets on Vril energy to the Nazis.

When the Third Reich surrendered on May 8th 1945, Maria Orsic fled Germany with Vril energy papers in her briefcase.

And the next thing she knew, she found herself in the arms of Napoleon in the Elysian Fields.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopherย 
Thursday February 13th


  1. Benie Langat said,


  2. George F. said,

    Was she looking at a cell phone when she almost fell into the river? Now that would be funny!

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      No, she was trying to retrieve a telephone pole that had been knocked over into the river by a cyclops trying to take a selfie with his cell phone.

      • George F. said,


      • George F. said,

        LOL! I’m beginning to think that successful writing is stating the painstakingly obvious in excruciating detail. Just my random thought for the day,

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        On another blog earlier this week, I read that Successful writing is telling people what they already know but had never really thought about.

      • George F. said,

        Good point.

  3. David Redpath said,

    Thankfully, the gullible Nazi occult
    crazed leadership wasted much
    time and resources chasing erroneous
    fairytales, such as Maria Orsic’s,
    hoping to weaponise the mystic.
    Fortunately, the Allies relied on
    cold hard science, and providence.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, the Germany of the 1920s was full of occultic nonsense.

      Much like the U.S.A. is today.

      National Security Council meetings will consist of examining one another’s chakras, noting the colour of cystals on one’s mood ring, examining the entrails of vegans and wearing pyramids on one’s head.

      • David Redpath said,

        On top of their tinfoil hats.
        You should never let the aliens
        know who you think, like who
        made the best acceptance
        speech at this years Oscars.
        Or any other vitality important
        Speaking of which, Napoleon is
        forever complaining to me how
        he was gradually poisoned whilst
        imprisoned on the island of Saint
        Helena. I keep telling him he’s
        crazy. The British would never
        have done that!
        Anyway, Uncle Joe Stalin, as
        channelled by Uncle Ernie, has
        Informed me that he’s very happy
        with Comrade Bernie’s progress
        towards the White House.
        It’s a mad wacky world! ๐Ÿค”
        Particularly when Uncle Ernie gets
        his crystal ball out ๐Ÿ”ฎ and starts
        madly wacking his chakras. After
        a bottle of Jack Daniels, it’s his
        way of accessing the spirit world.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        And while Uncle Ernie is in good spirits, he starts contacting bad spirits.๐Ÿ‘ป

      • David Redpath said,

        Like a hippy from a batch of bad
        LSD at Woodstock (a regrettable
        incident that Uncle Ernie takes
        absolutely no responsibility for),
        the spirits seem to flee whenever
        Uncle Ernie comes knocking on their
        basement door. So he tends to hang
        out with his more recently dearly
        departed friends, such as Aleister
        Crowley, Timothy Leary, Che Guevara,
        Doris Day, Jimi Hendrix, Nancy
        Reagan, and so on. But he does
        seem to some spiritual symbiotic
        connection with a certain Grigori
        Rasputin. He always seems to pop
        up when Uncle Ernie goes into one
        of his drug fuelled trance states.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Rasputin eh? ๐Ÿค”

        Now there’s a sinister figure. ๐Ÿ˜ฌ

        Strange he’d hang out with an old drag queen like Uncle Ernie.

        Seeing as how it was a transvestite drag queen Grand Duke and prince who poisoned and shot him and poisoned and shot him and poisoned and shot him and poisoned and shot him and eventually threw him in the river where the mad monk finally drowned half an hour later as his phallus was frozen to the bottom of the river and Rasputin couldn’t go up for air.

      • David Redpath said,

        Just goes to show, you can’t keep
        a good mad monk down.
        Uncle Ernie has that in common with
        Rasputin. Whenever performing as
        Cumelita, his acclaimed Drag Queen
        persona, despite copious amounts
        of self-medicating, his frozen little
        weiner would keep resurfacing up
        from his sequined g-string ๐ŸŒญ

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I suppose Uncle Ernie’s balloon shows for kiddies started to land him in trouble when he reverted to his Cumelita personality when hot dogs started being served.

      • David Redpath said,

        I warned him not to combine his
        kiddie parties balloon sculpting
        business with his Drag Queen act.
        I believe several children are still
        receiving counselling ๐Ÿ˜ณ

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        One of them will probably grow up to be a writer of Australian horror fiction whose works will rival that of American Stephen King. ๐Ÿ˜ฑ

      • David Redpath said,

        Knowing Uncle Ernie, he’ll take all the
        credit, plus not 10% of book sales ๐Ÿ˜Ž

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I’m sure the author will be quite happy to give Uncle Ernie not 10% of book sales.

  4. Jessica said,

    Loki doesn’t know how to make a proper lutefisk! For best result he should: Add lutefisk skin side down in a large casserole dish. Sprinkle with salt. Cover the mold with aluminum foil and leave the fish in the oven at 225 ยฐ C for 30-40 minutes. Then he should serve it with mustard sauce and plenty of crispy fried bacon bits! ๐Ÿ˜‹ I love it that way ๐Ÿ˜‚

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks for the recipe, Jessica. ๐Ÿ™‚

      That sounds delicious. ๐Ÿ˜‹

      • Jessica said,

        It is! โค It’s the only way I’ll eat lutefisk ๐Ÿ˜

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        If I ever get to spend Christmas again with my sister who lives way up in northern Alberta, I’ll tell my brother-in-law (who’s half-German and half-Norwegian) who usually makes the Christmas dinner and makes lutefisk with it to prepare it that way. โค

      • Jessica said,

        Whoa, do you somehow know somehow some Norwegian and German words too? ๐Ÿคฉ

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I know a few. ๐Ÿ˜€

      • Jessica said,

        Godt, det betyr at du kan snakker med nordmenn ๐Ÿ˜

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Jeg kan.

        Jeg sier, “Aerlig, Scarlett, jeg gir meg ikke noe” til sorstatene. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ

      • Jessica said,


      • Dracul Van Helsing said,


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