Justin Trudeau’s Failed Macho Man Impersonation and The Unmasked Demon Dancer Chief Woos

February 21, 2020 at 11:55 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel)

Justin Trudeau’s Failed Macho Man Impersonation and The Unmasked Demon Dancer Chief Woos

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was doing a guest news editorial on a very very independent Ottawa radio station.

“Well,” Renfield began, “after a week, Canada’s Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is apparently sick of being called a “wimp” (namely because he is one) and earlier today after swallowing the contents of a dozen bottles of testosterone tablets marched (instead of his usual “minced”) to a media briefing room with important members of his cabinet and in his deepest (closest he could muster to a baritone sounding) voice announced, “These barricades must come down now.”

Of course Justin didn’t say what he would do if the barricades by indigenous gangs (self-proclaimed Warrior societies) and their Marxist Trotskyite co-travellers didn’t come down from blocking the nation’s railway and transportation system since the cranial contents challenged son of self-proclaimed philosopher king Pierre Elliot said he still wouldn’t call in the police to take down the blockades.

Justin thinks no doubt that his failed Macho Man routine would be enough to frighten the anarchistically inclined Mohawk Warriors to take down their railway blockades at Belville Ontario and outside the Kanesatake settlement in Quebec.

Well despite the dozen bottles of testosterone pills he swallowed and his pitiful attempt at trying to talk in a baritone voice saying “These barricades must come down now” to the group of costumed figured puppets dressed as Alvin and The Chimpmunks singing behind the curtain (as Justin spoke) in their Chipmunk sounding voices those 1978 Village People lyrics, “Macho, macho, macho man, I gotta be a macho man…”, I doubt very much the Tyendinaga Mohawk Warriors near Bellville Ontario or the Kanesatake Mohawk Warriors near Oka, Quebec will be taking down their blockades anytime soon without police intervention.

I noticed a photo of the Wet’suwet’en hereditary chiefs who are opposed to the natural gas pipeline in northern B.C. standing in front of a Tim Horton’s restaurant in a food court on the TV news tonight.

No doubt they were wondering why the plant based beef burgers they had just bought at the Tim Horton’s behind them didn’t taste exactly the same as the supposedly plant based beef burgers that the beautiful woman (who was actually a Wechuge evil spirit in disguise) gave them in the first place that caused their panties to twist into a knot over the natural gas pipeline.

An investigation by the Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka, vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing and Interpol agent Peter Whitstable showed the same beautiful woman (who is actually a Wechuge evil spirit ) had given Tim Horton’s boxes containing supposedly plant based beef burgers to the Tyendinaga Mohawk Warriors last night.

Meanwhile the Wet’suwet’en hereditary Chief Woos spoke at a news conference earlier today.

Seeing Chief Woos speak at that news conference, two words come most pre-eminently to mind.

And those two words are “total scumbag”.

And when I say that, I’m judging him by the content of his character (and his facial expression that so clearly reflects the content of that character) and not the colour of his skin nor his ethnic background.”

. . .

Meanwhile Pope Francis was reading today’s Munich Agreement in which Vatican Foreign Minister Archbishop Paul Gallagher had met with Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi in Munich and had surrendered control over the Catholic Church in China to the Communist government of Xi Jinping.

. . .


Meanwhile the Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka stood and watched in horror as the Wechuge evil spirit (shapeshifted into a beautiful woman) was gathering up cartons marked Tim Horton’s of supposedly plant based beef burgers that she had just fed the Kanesatake Mohawk Warriors prior to their meeting with the Wechuge influenced Wet’suwet’en hereditary chiefs tomorrow.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday February 21st
2020.

8 Comments

  1. Kritika said,

    This is awesome. Alvin and Chipmunks and dozen bottles of testosterone pills. I am sure Justin would be high his whole life. Hahaha

  2. Jessica said,

    My only thought after the testosterone part is that maybe he overdose 😂
    I kind of miss Van Helsing. Unbelievable.

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