Countess Draculina, Justin, A Gender Confused Wombat and A Pot Smoking Walrus
Countess Draculina, Justin, A Gender Confused Wombat and A Pot Smoking Walrus
Justin entered the mirror.
And felt the wet sand under his feet.
What happened to his shoes and socks he wondered?
The Basilides gnostic god Abraxas had them on his two feet (which were heads of serpents) in another dimension.
Walking through two inter-dimensional portal mirrors on the same night can cause stuff to go missing.
Which was always the noted Australian entertainer Uncle Ernie’s explanation whenever his g-string style jock strap fell off while he was on the stage in his drag queen show and the audience could see what he had (or lack thereof!).
Justin looked at the vampiress who stood before him.
“A little bird tells me that you’re the Countess Draculina the daughter of Count Dracula,” Justin spoke with his usual meandering manner of speaking.
Countess Draculina leaned forward and shouted “Boo!”.
The little hummingbird on Justin’s shoulder flew away.
“I didn’t know there was a full moon tonight,” Justin looked at the full moon and the Scottish castle behind Countess Draculina.
“That is an illusion,” Draculina laughed, “caused by a great searchlight (invented by Nikola Tesla) casting its full moon signal into the air.”
“Will signs and wonders never cease?” Justin used a fine tooth comb to remove gray hairs from his hair.
“Those signs and wonders will soon increase and increase,” Draculina licked the blood off her lips just as an Australian wombat (who was actually Uncle Ernie shapeshifting from another dimension) crawled up and licked the blood off her breasts atop her low-cut gothic attire mini dress.
“And what is the purpose of all these signs and wonders?” Justin asked as he inhaled pot smoke that was being exhaled by a pot smoking Arctic walrus that had just crawled on to the shore from the sea.
The ghost of John Lennon appeared on one of the high towers of the distant Scottish castle and began singing a paraphrased version of one of his old hits, “Imagine all the people worshipping the Antichrist… someday you’ll join us and the world will be as one.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday February 24th
2020.
Kritika said,
February 25, 2020 at 1:13 am
Haha this was fun.
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 25, 2020 at 1:24 am
Thanks, Kritika. 🙂
Glad you enjoyed this night in Scotland. 🌝
David Redpath said,
February 25, 2020 at 4:44 am
The Numbat, an insectivorous
marsupial native to Australia,
is actually Uncle Ernie’s spirit
animal. But he does morph into
a Wombat from time to time.
When asked why, Uncle Ernie
replied that a Wombat eats
roots, shoots, and leaves?
I just don’t get it 🤔
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 25, 2020 at 3:34 pm
No doubt sampling all of Mother Earth’s natural pharmaceutical products as a wombat.
I guess all the wood in your home is in good condition as a result of Uncle Ernie in his capacity as numbat. 😎
David Redpath said,
February 25, 2020 at 4:57 pm
No termites under our floorboards,
Chris 🐜 Thanks to Uncle Ernie’s
midnight munchie attacks.
He’s thinking of resurrecting the
extinct Tasmania Tiger as his next
spirit animal 🐅 He has a thing for
little tiger, but it always seems to
get him in trouble 🤔
Jessica said,
February 25, 2020 at 7:02 pm
Hohoho! Draculina doesn’t seem so bad now… and John Lennon’s ghost? That I must see 😆
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 25, 2020 at 8:38 pm
Yes, you”ll have to pay a visit to the west coast of Scotland and look up that Scottish castle and say hello to John Lennon’s ghost. 😌
Jessica said,
February 26, 2020 at 1:59 am
One day I will! 😁
Dracul Van Helsing said,
February 26, 2020 at 2:45 am
👍🏻👌🏻