Renfield, Franz Kohler, Van Helsing, Hera and Zeus On The 75th Anniversary of Hitler’s Death
Renfield, Franz Kohler, Van Helsing, Hera and Zeus On The 75th Anniversary of Hitler’s Death
British MP Renfield R. Renfield was being interviewed by an independent radio station in Great Falls, Montana.
“So, what do you think of New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio attacking New York’s Hasidic Jewish community in one of his tweets because so many people attended a rabbi’s funeral in Brooklyn?” The interviewer asked.
“Antisemitism can now be added to Bill de Blasio’s long list of inherent stupidities,” Renfield answered.
“Turning towards economics here in America, as millions of Americans are now losing their jobs as a result of the Coronavirus lockdown, the ultra-wealthy elite such as Amazon’s Jeff Bezos, Microsoft founder Bill Gates and Berkshire Hathaway’s Warren Buffett have made an extra $282 billion in just 23 days of the pandemic, what’s your comment on that?” Asked the Great Falls radio journalist.
“In any shitty situation, the super rich always seem to come up smelling like a rose while the rest of us find our bones and blood and tears and sweat mixed in with the rest of the huge amounts of fertilizer dumped on all the middle and lower strata of society,” Renfield replied.
“Is there a way out of this pandemic and what does the post pandemic world hold for us?” The journalist inquired.
“Well Doris Day sang the answer to that question a lot better than I ever could in her song Que Sera, Sera,” said Renfield, “but I will say this, if you honestly believe that a perfect world can be achieved by the likes of Bill Gates, Pope Francis, the Chinese Communist Party, John Kerry, Greta Thunberg, Michael Moore and the whole Transgender movement, you’re crazy.”
. . .
It was 75 years ago today that Nazi Germany’s Fuhrer Adolf Hitler committed suicide only hours after he married his mistress Eva Braun.
What numerous assassination attempts over the years failed to accomplish, marriage succeeded in doing in a few hours.
. . .
“Shit,” Herr Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau said upon hearing the news that Der Fuhrer was dead.
“What is it?” His assistant asked.
“Ironically, with my twisted sense of humour, I had hid the secret formula for Vril energy in a room in the British Museum in London,” Kohler’s tears fell into his sauerkraut, “And now that we’ve lost the war, the Allies may find it.”
. . .
The Greek goddess Hera was standing in a room in the British Museum listening to a jazz rehearsal.
It had come to her attention that two time travellers – Herr Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau and Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing – would be racing across the corridors of time to be the first to get to this room on this particular date in 1945.
Van Helsing was the first to arrive carrying his Houdini-Pantages-Tesla-Welles-Lamarr magic lantern film projector which allowed him to time travel.
“Glad to see you’re the first to arrive, Van Helsing,” Hera smiled at him, “Care to make out?”.
As Van Helsing was busy making out with the Greek goddess Hera, a blue eyed white wolf belonging to the Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka carried the secret formula for Vril energy back across time before the SS’ Herr Franz Kohler arrived on the scene.
Meanwhile in a London hotel dining room, the Greek god Zeus was enjoying a feast fit for a king when the ghost of William Shakespeare came up to him and whispered in his ear, “Thou has just been cuckholded.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 30th
2020.
Archbishop Vigano Says The Vatican Never Released The Text of The Third Secret of Fatima
Archbishop Vigano Says The Vatican Never Released The Text of The Third Secret of Fatima
The demon Asmodeus and the little green frog Nimrod were once again walking the streets of Rome.
They noticed a cardinal giving money to a bunch of distressed looking drag queens standing at a street corner.
“That cardinal looks familiar,” Nimrod remarked as he licked a black fly flavoured ice cream cone he was holding in his little webbed hands.
“That’s Cardinal Konrad Krajewski the Papal Almoner (papal chaplain in charge of distributing money to the deserving poor),” Asmodeus replied, “Ever since the Covid-19 pandemic struck, Rome’s transgendered prostitutes have suffered a work stoppage as a result of no more clients taking them out.”
“So, why is the Papal Almoner giving them money?” Nimrod inquired.
“Guilt, I imagine,” Asmodeus ate a take out plate of lasagna, “It was Francis’ Vatican officials who were undoubtedly their biggest customers. Kept them in their Paris and Milan designed sequined dresses, Wolford pantyhose and Christian Louboutin spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes. Now they’re having to settle for hand me downs from the Salvation Army Women’s Clothing Department. It must have been quite the come down financially and fashionally speaking.”
A rare American tourist couple – a man and a woman- were out walking the deserted streets of Rome in total disobedience to the Italian government’s lockdown orders.
They were walking up the street and away from the Vatican.
The woman turned around and looked at the Vatican whereupon she turned into a pillar of salt.
“I see Archbishop Carlo Maria Vigano (who’s been in hiding since the summer of 2018 to avoid being bumped off by Pope Francis’ gay lavender mafia) is saying that the Third Secret of Fatima (words spoken by the Virgin Mary to three shepherd children at Fatima, Portugal in 1917) has never been officially released by the Vatican despite Vatican claims they released it back on June 26th 2000,” Nimrod ate some Boston clam chowder soup with several flies in it.
“That’s true,” Asmodeus ate a beef donair, “British MP Renfield R. Renfield discovered the actual Third Secret in a retired Austrian Army colonel’s briefcase back on November 9th 2018. The same day that a geopolitical analyst friend of Renfield discovered that the text of the Third Secret had been given by the Virgin Mary to a Japanese nun Sister Agnes Sasagawa on October 13th 1973 finding the full message of Our Lady of Akita by deciding that the full message might actually be located at the back pages of Google Search on the topic Our Lady of Akita rather than towards the front.”
“And what was the essence of the message?” Nimrod swiped some hand sanitizing lotion from the back pockets of a Rome policeman so he could wash and sanitize his little webbed hands.
“It said that a Great War would be started in the 21st Century by Satan’s partisans in the East (possibly a reference to Russia or China or North Korea as Satan’s partisans in the West would of course be the United States of America and the European Union), fire would fall from Heaven and turn the waters of the ocean into steam and millions of people would die by the minute. There was also a prophecy that Satan would end up controlling one third of the Catholic clergy and Satan would succeed in infiltrating to the very top of the Church,” Asmodeus ate a submarine sandwich.
“What is considered the very top of the Church?” Nimrod struggled to get the top off a jar of roasted hazelnut peanut butter.
“The Papacy,” Asmodeus grabbed the jar of roasted hazelnut peanut butter for Nimrod and yanked the top off.
On the dome of Saint Peter’s Basilica as the sun was setting, Pope Francis was making hand shadow puppets in the form of a horned goat’s head.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday April 29th
2020.
Renfield and Amadeus Discuss Bill Gates
Renfield and Amadeus Discuss Bill Gates
Amadeus Emanon (who had gone to Australia back in January to help rescue koala bears and kangaroos from the wildfires and had to remain there as a result of global lockdown over Covid-19) was talking to his friend British MP Renfield R. Renfield via Skype.
Amadeus (licking an ice cream cone) : I hear Julia Roberts and Oprah Winfrey will be hosting another Celebrities Performing From Their Homes Livestreaming On TV Special in which they will once again be calling on the world to unite as one in the face of the pandemic.
Renfield: Julia Roberts is of course a member of the Hollywood crowd. Which automatically lowers a person’s IQ by several percentage points. To say nothing of the Devil holding a lease on one’s soul.
Amadeus (bringing out a plate of pancakes covered in maple syrup): What about Oprah Winfrey?
Renfield: Well just as John The Baptist was the herald announcing the coming of Jesus Christ, I always thought Oprah Winfrey was the herald announcing the coming of the Antichrist seeing as how she was always having numerous New Age nutcases on her show and promoting their books and courses over the years. Instead of the voice of one crying in the wilderness, she was the voice of one sobbing on the airwaves.
Amadeus (finishing his pancakes): What’s the latest with Bill Gates?
Renfield: Well I see Robert F. Kennedy Jr. (The son of assassinated 1968 Presidential candidate Bobby Kennedy) is really going after Bill Gates and his vaccine efforts. Pointing out that the reason Gates does his vaccinations in countries in Africa, Asia and Latin America is because then they’re beyond the reach of FDA regulations in the U.S.A. And Gates’ vaccination efforts over in those nations have a record of serious side effects. His vaccination experiments in India, Afghanistan, the Philippines, Kenya, Tanzania, the Congo, Nicaragua and Mexico have led to paralysis among many, sterility among girls and young women, and then producing epidemics of the diseases that people are supposed to be being vaccinated against. It’s interesting for someone like Gates, who along with his Lady MacBeth like wife Melinda, hopes to be part of the global Communist elite along with Pope Francis, George Soros, Jeffrey Sachs, Bono and Chinese Comrade Xi Jinping, his vaccination policies reek of Nazi eugenics since he seems to do most of his vaccination experiments on non-whites.
Amadeus (eating a handful of nuts from a bowl of nuts): Hm. Someone who’s both a Nazi eugenecist and a Communist. That’s interesting.
Renfield: Only in the 21st Century would you get ideological hybrid screw-ups such as that.
Amadeus: What do you think Bill Gates’ problem is?
Renfield: I suspect it can be traced back to Bill Gates reading Isaac Asimov’s Foundation Trilogy at an impressionable age. Those books always appealed to a certain type of Baby Boomer nerd who became convinced after reading them that it was their destiny to someday micromanage the world.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday April 28th
2020.
Netanyahu, Bin Salman and A Tale of Two Pans
Netanyahu, bin Salman and A Tale of Two Pans
Some foul mouthed teen girl bicyclist was riding down the street shooting her foul mouth illiterate mouth off, “I’ve got the whole world at my feet, motherfucker.”
Pan Goatee who was putting the garbage out promptly beheaded the foul mouth trash can sporting a bad hair style and commented before hand, “Two words of advice. Don’t talk to yourself in public or people might think you’re insane. And don’t suffer from delusions of grandeur.”
He kicked the motherfucking female cyclist’s head down the street where it was promptly eaten by rats.
. . .
U. S. President Donald Trump was talking to his butler and valet Athelstan, “Somebody tweeted me an article from the Nostradumbass Science Enquirer saying that if I were to launch nuclear weapons all over the planet, that would provide enough heat and radiation to kill the Wuhan Virus. What do you think, Athelstan?”.
“Don’t do it, sir,” Athelstan answered.
. . .
Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman was talking to his allies in the United Arab Emirates about the genocidal campaign they had been carrying out against the Houthis in Yemen (with U.S. support) for the past several years.
“Why don’t they just roll over and play dead for real?” The Saudi Crown Prince was foaming at the mouth, “We’ve been cluster bombing them. We’ve been cutting off most of their food supply. But they won’t starve to death. We’ve been cutting off medical aid to them but they won’t succumb to Covid-19 or any other illness and die en masse. This is very inconsiderate of them. Why in the name of Allah the Merciful won’t they just die when we’ve spent hundreds of millions trying to exterminate them?”.
The U.A.E. representative had no answer for the bombastic Saudi Crown Prince.
. . .
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was talking to a Mossad agent named Star of Azazel.
“We are going to be annexing a whole bunch of territories in the West Bank over the next couple of months,” Netanyahu said between mouthfuls of kosher corn beef sandwich, “And the U.S. government says it will back us in this. I’m about to earn an everlasting legacy in Israel’s history. And in my humble opinion, I can say no Israeli politician is more deserving of this. I just hope I don’t come down with Covid-19 like Britain’s Boris Johnson did. That would put a damper on everything.”
. . .
Meanwhile in Saint Peter’s Basilica in Rome, the Greek nature god Pan and the demon Baphomet were taking the figure of Christ off a Crucifix and substituting in its place a figure of the Middle Eastern goat demon Azazel.
But since there were no public Masses being held in Italy these days, it would be a while before anyone would notice.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday April 27th
2020.
Cernunnos’ One Man Paris Stag Party and A Renfield Livestream Podcast
Cernunnos’ One Man Paris Stag Party and A Renfield Livestream Podcast
Cernunnos the Celtic stag god was walking the streets of Paris carrying his crossbow and poisoned arrows.
He was approached on one of the empty Paris streets by a gendarme who barked at him, “I want to see your papers.”
This sentence so reminiscent of the old Third Reich and the old USSR was heard a lot on the streets of what had previously passed for the world’s democracies these days.
Cernunnos raised his crossbow and shot an arrow.
“Merde,” was the Paris gendarme’s last word before he died.
The Celtic stag god then went to look at the River Seine.
It seemed to be much clearer and more fish in it ever since the lockdown occurred.
Cernunnos looked to the other side of the River Seine and noticed the Greek nature god Pan walking on its banks.
He had been dead for several centuries and now he was back.
Cernunnos went back and listened to a podcast in the Paris apartment he had recently commandeered by slaying its owner.
On it was British MP Renfield R. Renfield who said it was the Industrial Revolution that had ultimately led to the world’s pollution and environmental degradation.
In the post pandemic world, Renfield suggested going back to a more pre-industrial revolution rural society where a lot of products were grown and made locally.
This would help employment locally plus the food produced would be fresher and also free of all the crap that a lot of major global food conglomerates put in the food they sold.
Renfield suggested avoiding being ruled by a centralized global world government that was being advocated by Communist eugenicists like Pope Francis, Bill and Melinda Gates, the WHO and the United Nations.
Renfield quoted the late U.S. President Ronald Reagan who once said, “There’s no more terrifying words in the English language than someone saying, “Hi, I’m from the government and I’m here to help.” ‘
Renfield pointed out how helpful the PRC government in Beijing was when they ignored the words of a Wuhan opthalmologist and denied a problem even existed.
Or how the governments of the world did not end travel to and from China at the start of mounting reports of an epidemic with the exception of the usually moronic Donald Trump.
How governments screw up, Renfield said, can be seen on the question of face masks.
Even though the WHO itself said there’s no evidence that face masks stop transmission of the Coronavirus, Renfield noted, “California’s neo-Stalinist governor Gavin Newsom is having people arrested for not wearing face masks. When all this is over, the people of California should revoke Gov. Newsom’s March 2019 moratorium on capital punishment and celebrate the occasion by having Gov. Newsom shot by firing squad. Just like Norwegians revoked their past tradition of long anti-capital punishment laws temporarily after World War II just so they could have the pleasure of shooting Quisling by firing squad.”
“I like this guy,” Cernunnos took a swig of Jägermeister and continued to watch Renfield’s livestream.
“So seeing as how we see governments are constantly screwing up at the local, regional and national levels, what makes you think a world government will be less susceptible to major screw-ups?” Renfield took a swig of whisky, “The bigger the government, the bigger the screw-ups. Smile my friends. The days of fossil fuels are over. This can be seen by the fact the Rockefellers are moving out of Standard Oil. They’ve obviously received insider information that a more environmentally friendly energy source is now on its way. My former boss the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set moved all his money out of oil industry investments at the start of this year. We don’t need a global Communist One World government ending the fossil fuels industry for us. It’s going to happen anyways. Tell Bill Gates where he can shove his 666 Mark of The Beast vaccine. In fact, if you get the opportunity, shove it in that place on Bill Gates’ own person. Then take pictures with your smart phone. When you see the highly unusual multitude of colours suddenly appearing on Bill Gates’ buttocks, then get down on your knees and thank God you didn’t take Bill and Melinda Gates’ 666 Mark of the Beast vaccine. Thank you for listening, ladies and gentlemen. And God bless the alcohol distillery industry.”
Renfield slides off his chair on to the floor as credits are shown on the livestream and the melody of Sir Edward Elgar’s Land of Hope and Glory is played.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday April 26th
2020.
Is Kim Jong-un On His Death Bed?
Is Kim Jong-un On His Death Bed?
“The most compelling empirical evidence to date that North Korea’s Kim Jong-un might indeed be lying on his deathbed is Donald Trump’s recent statement that reports of Kim having a serious illness are “gross exaggerations” and “fake news”.
-Renfield R. Renfield MP
Kim Jong-un was lying on top of his bed in his best suit (he didn’t want to be caught wearing clothes that he wouldn’t want to be found dead in).
“Egg foo yung,” Kim whispered in a somewhat audible voice, “Egg foo yung.”
“He really should have better scriptwriters in my opinion,” commented the ghost of Orson Welles who had Charles Foster Kane saying the word “Rosebud” on his death bed.
Orson’s ghost had somehow managed to evade the spirits of Kim’s ancestors to enter the North Korean Presidential Palace and Kim’s Presidential suite bedroom.
A group of beautiful young North Korean women wearing lovely colourful dresses knelt at the bottom of the portly young Kim’s bed and wailed like a Greek chorus mourning the death of Adonis in a Classical Greek tragedy.
A gong sounded and the beautiful North Korean women’s chorus immediately stopped wailing.
“Our shift is over, girls,” said the leader of the women.
They departed giggling and laughing and talked about what they might have for supper and who’d they be dating next weekend.
A new group of beautiful young North Korean women wearing lovely colourful dresses took positions at the bottom of the portly young Kim’s bed and resumed wailing.
. . .
Kim Yo-jong (the younger sister of Kim Jong-un) stood in front of her mirror holding a bottle of Corona beer in one hand and a diamond, emerald, sapphire and jade laced golden crown in the other.
Kim Yo-jong (speaking) :
Does the hand of Fate bequeath a new crown?
As Thanatos smiles behind a silent frown?
Has a golden corona struck down a King so a Queen may reign?
An Olympic garland wreath comes to me via a crown spoken in Spain?
I call upon the spirits of my ancestors to bless me
as a new journey I may undertake.
America’s trump has sounded from one whose golden crown is densely fake.
Yet will a disinfectant injection into my brother’s lungs will he take?
-A vampire novel chapter
and neo-Shakespearean soliloquy
written by Christopher
Saturday April 25th
2020
Pan Goatee Beheads Non-Social Distancing Uglos
Pan Goatee Beheads Non-Social Distancing Uglos
Genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee was awakened by the sound of a bunch of cars honking.
Some bozos in the neighbourhood decided to celebrate some stupid occasion by driving around in dozens of cars honking their horns.
All because people could no longer meet in groups above 15 due to the dictates of Alberta Premier Jason Fat Boy Kenney’s ugly looking female Provincial Health Officer.
How did he ever miss out on beheading her?
Probably because he’d never visited the provincial capital of Edmonton he deduced in Sherlockian fashion.
Goatee looked out the window and vomited all over the coffee table when he saw a whole bunch of ugly looking females standing up and down the block (not practicing social distancing either- the ugly looking airheads) waving signs with stupid slogans.
Goatee reached for his astral laser machete and went running down the block beheading the ugly looking females en masse.
He approached one ugly looking school girl.
“You know what the trouble with ugly looking kids is?” Goatee explained as he lopped the young uglo’s head off, “they grow up to be ugly looking adults.”
“You’ll no longer have to worry about following the WHO’s social distancing regulations ever again,” Goatee remarked to one ugly looking mother as he decapitated her.
Later that day, Alberta’s ugly looking female Provincial Health Officer addressing her daily news conference while this time wearing a paper bag over her head (because there were rumours that Pan Goatee was in the provincial capital) told the social distancing media that she had several non-Covid 19 deaths to report, “Several females in our province have been beheaded today because they were ugly. Returning once again to our daily Covid-19 death count…”
On-line bookies and on-line gamblers waited with baited breath to see who would win today’s jackpot for having correctly predicted the exact number of Covid-19 deaths in the province for the day.
. . .
Down in Las Vegas Nevada, Ares the Greek god of war and Thor the Norse god of thunder had the entire city to themselves since all the casinos, lounges, bars, restaurants and wedding chapels were now closed to mortal humans.
Desert coyotes and road runners were outside the buildings running amuck in city streets.
Ares and Thor after having finished off all the liquor and booze in the Bellagio Hotel and Casino were now starting on all the booze and liquor at the Caesars Palace Hotel and Casino.
Ares (drinking a Corona with lime): Say what’s the number of recoveries from Covid-19?
Thor (drinking a bottle of tequila with half a worm in it): What?
Ares: The number of recoveries from Covid-19. They’re always talking about the number of cases of Covid-19. The number of deaths from Covid-19. How come they never give the number of recoveries from Covid-19?
Thor: I don’t know. Do I look like the fucking Director-General of WHO?
Ares (putting on a pair of glasses he had swiped from the hotel’s sole remaining security guard who had died after injecting Lysol household disinfectant directly into his lungs on the recommendation of U.S. President Donald Trump) : No, you don’t look like the sort of person who would give Xi Jinping blow jobs.
Thor: That’s because I’m not.
Ares: What will happen if people are quarantined in their homes all across the planet for the next 18 months to 2 years like so many scientific experts are suggesting but no political leader seems to want to mention?
Thor (making himself a lime Margarita) : I don’t know. A lot of people will go insane I guess.
Ares: And what about the economy? It will totally collapse won’t it? What will happen to agriculture? The food supply? People are going to start dropping dead of hunger aren’t they?
Thor (warming up a frozen plate of Hors d’oeuvres in the lounge microwave) : Oh, probably.
Ares: How am I going to be able to start any wars if people are dead?
Thor: Well maybe you better go start a war before a whole bunch of people start dying from the pandemic or dying from hunger.
Ares (hiccoughing) : An excellent suggestion. I think I’ll go do that now.
(Ares stumbles his way outside where he’s then run over by a road runner)
-A vampire novel chapter
and short play
written by Christopher
Friday April 24th
2020.
Saint George and The Dragon
Saint George and The Dragon
There is an old tradition in the Greek Orthodox Church
that angels could fall until the 1st Coming of Christ
By Christ’s 1st Coming, the choices they made would then be their eternal decision and destination forever more.
Just as for mortal humans, they have until the moment of their own death or until Christ’s 2nd Coming (whatever comes first) to decide their eternal fate
And so even though Lucifer and a large portion of the angels fell in a Cosmic rebellion against the Creator of the Cosmos
Yet other angels fell afterwards
Until Christ’s 1st Coming.
And so it was that a Watcher angel called Semjaza
landed with 199 other Watcher angels
on Mount Hermon
on what is today the Israel-Lebanon-Syria border region
They saw that the daughters of men were fair
(Unlike today where a lot of the daughters of men are quite repulsively ugly and require a Pan Goatee to bump them off in order to restore Earth’s aesthetic balance)
And desired to mate with them
Semjaza got the other 199 to swear an oath upon Mount Hermon
That he wouldn’t be the only one to participate in this angelic sin of mating with human women
In addition to mating with mortal women
Semjaza also made out with the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith
And she gave birth to Azazel
Azazel son of Semjaza and Lilith
Became the leader of the Watchers and the Nephilim
And taught humanity both war and witchcraft
Later Azazel was bound hand and foot by the Archangel Raphael
And chained to the rough and jagged rocks of Dudael
which is east of Jerusalem
But before that happened Azazel along with other Watcher angels and Nephilim
were engaging in genetic experiments and tampering with DNA of different species
(As Christ said, “Behold as it was in the days of Noah, so it shall be at the Coming of the Son of Man”)
Azazel took a fossilized skull of an old T-Rex
The fossilized body, wings and legs of a pterodactyl
The poisonous venom of a Basilisk
And the ability to breathe fire like from the mouth of the Middle Kingdom Phoenix bird (or Chinese Phoenix)
Put them together
And created a hybrid monster of all those species
Azazel threw this monster into the sea waters off Lebanon
Where it mainly fed on marine life
By the 200s AD however the dragon (for that is what it resembled most in appearance) was sunning itself on the beach when a mortal human maiden approached
It ate her and developed a penchant for female human flesh
So people up and down the coasts of Lebanon
Were forced to give their young females to the dragon as a sacrifice
to prevent the dragon from running amuck
And breathing fire down on their towns and villages
A young woman called Sabra
then found herself chained to a rock
Awaiting the approach of the dragon
one fine day in the late 290s AD
A young Roman soldier called George
came along riding a white horse
And slew the Dragon with his sword
when it approached Sabra
George himself was later slain by the Roman Emperor Diocletian (a human that was very much in personality like a demonic dragon)
for refusing to renounce his Christian faith
The death of George occurred on April 23rd 303 AD
in Nicomedia
The capital of ancient Bithynia
Which later served as an interim capital
for Constantine the Great
while the city of Byzantium was being rebuilt and later became Constantinople.
-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 23rd
2020.
Pachamama, Lenin, Earth Day and The Silence of The Viruses
Pachamama, Lenin, Earth Day and The Silence of the Viruses
British MP Renfield R. Renfield looked at the calendar.
April 22nd 2020.
The 50th Anniversary of Earth Day.
Which meant it was Lenin’s 150th birthday.
For Communists who had infiltrated the U.S. environmental movement back in the late ’60s and early ’70s had suggested to their non-Communist compatriots in the movement to declare April 22nd 1970 as the world’s first Earth Day (the Communists knowing full well that the date was Lenin’s 100th Birthday).
The non-Communist compatriots in the environmental movement all graduates of public school education in the U.S. where History (nor any other subject of value) was no longer taught thought that April 22nd 1970 was just as good a date as any other as far as they were concerned.
And various gems had emerged in the past week leading up to this particular Earth Day.
Bishop Marcelo Sanchez Sorondo the Chancellor of the Pontifical Academy of Sciences and the Pontifical Academy of Social Sciences (a man who back in 2018 had described and praised Chinese Communism as the best expression of Catholic Church social doctrine) had written an editorial in Science magazine this past week calling for a one world socialist (read Marxist) government in the “post-pandemic world”.
And it also turned out that Pope Francis’ Global Education Initiative by which the New Humanism (Pope Francis’ euphemism for Marxism) was to be taught in centres of learning and education all over the world had the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation as one of its major sponsors.
And American economist Jeffrey Sachs (who had really worked up his Frequent Flyers travel miles points in his trips back and forth to the Vatican since Francis became Pope) had also announced earlier this month that Pope Francis’ 2015 encyclical Laudato si’ should henceforth be regarded as the guidebook for the post-pandemic world.
Renfield had described Laudato si’ as the sort of book that Karl Marx, Pierre Teilhard de Chardin and Al Gore would have written had the three got together and collaborated on a book.
“So, I take it that it’s badly written and extremely boring?” His friend Sherrielock Holmes had asked him.
“Indeed,” Renfield nodded.
Renfield thought to himself that if William Shakespeare had been asked to give a one sentence review of the book, he’d have described it thus, “Tis a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury signifying nothing.”
And speaking of Teilhard, there was of course Pachamama.
Pachamama the Inca earth mother goddess through whom Teilhard had once boasted to Lenin and Trotsky that he could bring about the synthesis of Communism and Christianity.
Pachamama whose wooden idol statues were welcomed into both the Vatican Gardens and Saint Peter’s Basilica last October.
And the Pachamama Alliance had celebrated Earth Day at an event in which “former” Communist Van Jones (who had served briefly as Barack Obama’s Green Jobs Czar) had said the pandemic will help “regenerate our planet and social institutions”.
Former Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev had written a guest column in this week’s TIME Magazine called “When The Pandemic Is Over, The World Must Come Together” in which Gorbachev suggested holding an emergency special session of the UN General Assembly with “revising the entire global agenda as the main topic” leading “toward a new consciousness, a new civilization” (a definite slogan of Maitreyan New Age claptrap meets Marxist-Leninist hogwash).
Gorbachev, Renfield mused, no doubt sees this virus ridden moment in time as the fulfillment of his November 2nd 1987 speech to the Soviet Communist Party Congress in which he declared his commitment to an eventual One World Communist State and that glasnost and perestroika should only be seen as temporary stepping stones to this ultimate goal, “We are moving towards a new world, the world of Communism. We shall never turn off that road.”
The UN’s Communist Secretary General Antonio Guterres likewise released a message for what he called “International Mother Earth Day” in which he said the Coronavirus was opening up the opportunity for one planet governed as one.
And Pope Francis in an address yesterday called for the world’s people to “listen to the silence of the virus. The silence that the virus has imposed on the world and then act accordingly with what that silence is telling us.”
Pope Francis’ expression “silence of the virus” reminded Renfield of the title of that book about Dr. Hannibal Lecter which was called Silence of The Lambs.
Renfield sipped a martini, “It appears Pope Francis is leading the lambs to slaughter as they listen to the silence of the viruses.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday April 22nd
2020
The Inca earth mother goddess Pachmama awaits the arrival of the Norse wolf Fenrir.
Marmalade Montague: Birth of A Legend
Marmalade Montague: Birth of A Legend
In a bakery in Paris
were posters of the mummy Kharis
Who appeared in 1940s mummy movies
“Cause Imhotep wasn’t of the jazz Swing era groovies”
The bakery was owned by Marmalade Montague
At the end of the street or in French “la rue”
Marmalade was an eccentric gent
And because of the Covid-19 lockdown couldn’t pay the rent
So into the gutter he was thrown
Getting up, he made a moan
Inside Marmalade something snapped
opening up a genius untapped
So into the Paris catacombs he descended
and ran past ancient pipes all upended
When he emerged again
he carried a hen
and wore a silver wig
while his lips munched upon a fig
He was dressed from head to toe in Louis XIV era attire
So it was a good thing that his pants weren’t on fire
He proclaimed to empty streets
devoid of all and no words of greets
“I am Marmalade Montague court scientist to the Court of Louis Quatorze”
“So I say to you, Paris, open your doors”
But no doors opened and Marmalade Montague went back to the catacombs
A world of poor reception for many smart phones
For Marmalade Montague had gone mad
If he had any friends, they might have felt sad
But as it was Marmalade had gone from good to bad.
And on this April day a legend was born
In a world that was by a virus torn
No Sacrifice of the Mass was being said
Masons hoped to make of Notre Dame a temple of lead
And in Rome, the ex-Vicar of Christ was flaming Bolshevik red
Marmalade Montague had ceased to be a baker
In his mind he had become a Louis Quatorze court alchemist faker
And the world would never again be the same
Although the mainstream media would continue to be lame.
-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday April 21st 2020.
Dracul Van Helsing 
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