Netanyahu, Bin Salman and A Tale of Two Pans

April 27, 2020 at 9:41 pm (Aesthetics, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Netanyahu, bin Salman and A Tale of Two Pans

Some foul mouthed teen girl bicyclist was riding down the street shooting her foul mouth illiterate mouth off, “I’ve got the whole world at my feet, motherfucker.”

Pan Goatee who was putting the garbage out promptly beheaded the foul mouth trash can sporting a bad hair style and commented before hand, “Two words of advice. Don’t talk to yourself in public or people might think you’re insane. And don’t suffer from delusions of grandeur.”

He kicked the motherfucking female cyclist’s head down the street where it was promptly eaten by rats.

. . .

U. S. President Donald Trump was talking to his butler and valet Athelstan, “Somebody tweeted me an article from the Nostradumbass Science Enquirer saying that if I were to launch nuclear weapons all over the planet, that would provide enough heat and radiation to kill the Wuhan Virus. What do you think, Athelstan?”.

“Don’t do it, sir,” Athelstan answered.

. . .

Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman was talking to his allies in the United Arab Emirates about the genocidal campaign they had been carrying out against the Houthis in Yemen (with U.S. support) for the past several years.

“Why don’t they just roll over and play dead for real?” The Saudi Crown Prince was foaming at the mouth, “We’ve been cluster bombing them. We’ve been cutting off most of their food supply. But they won’t starve to death. We’ve been cutting off medical aid to them but they won’t succumb to Covid-19 or any other illness and die en masse. This is very inconsiderate of them. Why in the name of Allah the Merciful won’t they just die when we’ve spent hundreds of millions trying to exterminate them?”.

The U.A.E. representative had no answer for the bombastic Saudi Crown Prince.

. . .

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was talking to a Mossad agent named Star of Azazel.

“We are going to be annexing a whole bunch of territories in the West Bank over the next couple of months,” Netanyahu said between mouthfuls of kosher corn beef sandwich, “And the U.S. government says it will back us in this. I’m about to earn an everlasting legacy in Israel’s history. And in my humble opinion, I can say no Israeli politician is more deserving of this. I just hope I don’t come down with Covid-19 like Britain’s Boris Johnson did. That would put a damper on everything.”

. . .

Meanwhile in Saint Peter’s Basilica in Rome, the Greek nature god Pan and the demon Baphomet were taking the figure of Christ off a Crucifix and substituting in its place a figure of the Middle Eastern goat demon Azazel.

But since there were no public Masses being held in Italy these days, it would be a while before anyone would notice.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday April 27th
2020.

10 Comments

  1. Kritika said,

    A twist, two Pans, is interesting. πŸ‘

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Thanks, Kritika. πŸ™‚

      Yes, there’s the Pan who was the original Greek god of nature.

      And then there’s Pan Goatee who’s a genetically created satyr.

      • Kritika said,

        Okay. πŸ‘

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        And then if you want to fry some fish… there’s a third pan… a frying pan. πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

      • Kritika said,

        🀣🀣🀣
        I had Peter Pan in mind when I saw your comment.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        I’d forgotten all about Peter Pan. πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

        Where Peter Pan is, Tinkerbell is sure to follow. πŸ§šπŸ»β€β™€

      • Kritika said,

        πŸ˜‚

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        πŸ˜€

  2. velvetscreams said,

    I saw what you did thereπŸ˜‰

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