Isabelle Rocher and The Ghost of Prof. James Moriarty
Isabelle Rocher or Brigitte Bardot?
The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London was having a photo exhibit of original photos of European actresses.
On this particular early October evening (it had been exactly 3 years since the satanic AntiPope Jorge Mario Bergoglio aka Pope Francis had brought an idol of the demoness Pachamama into the Vatican Gardens to help open the Vatican Synod On The Amazon) it just so happened that the ghost of Prof. James Moriarty (Sherlock Holmes’ arch enemy) was wondering the streets of London.
Hades had granted Moriarty’s ghost a dispensational release from the Realm of the Underworld at the request of the demoness Pachamama.
Moriarty’s ghost noticed The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery and decided to enter.
He stared intently at a photograph of noted French actress Brigitte Bardot.
He kept saying over and over again, “Isabelle Rocher, Isabelle Rocher.”
“No,” Dashwood Forrest the owner of the gallery approached the ghostly spectral leader, “That’s Brigitte Bardot the famous French actress.”
“She looks exactly like my French mistress Isabelle Rocher,” the brilliant mathematician and criminal mastermind was astounded at the resemblance, “although I never saw her wear a skirt that looked like that. If I had, I’d have probably got hornier and had sex with her a lot sooner.”
“When did this Isabelle Rocher live?” Dashwood Forrest inquired.
“Back in the 19th Century,” Moriarty replied.
“No not many women wore skirts that looked like that back in the 19th Century,” Dashwood Forrest admitted, “save possibly women who worked in the inside of bordellos.”
“I had fled to Latin America when she told me that she was pregnant,” Moriarty recalled, “And when I returned to France, I discovered that she had given birth to a son called Louis. They left Paris and went to the French countryside somewhere. I could never track them down. I saw Louis’ baptismal certificate and she had listed the father as unknown. So I imagine he took his mother’s last name for his own. Louis Rocher would have been his name.”
“There was a famous French scientist called Dr. Louis Rocher who was shot down and killed by the Red Baron the day before the Red Baron himself was shot down and killed,” Dashwood Forrest recalled.
“The Red Baron?” Moriarty’s ghostly face looked quizzical.
“I’ll explain the history later,” Forrest was familiar with entertaining the dead as he once had had an Irish zombie named Mulligan as a manservant.
“And did this Dr. Louis Rocher have any offspring?” Moriarty inquired.
“He did,” Forrest nodded, “In fact his great- grandson Dr. Cadbury Rocher is the chief scientist for Set Enterprises here in London.”
“I wonder who Louis Rocher’s wife was?” Prof. James Moriarty mused aloud.
“Sherrielock Holmes,” Forrest answered.
Moriarty’s jaw dropped, “Sherlock Holmes’ lesser known twin sister?”.
“That’s her,” Forrest nodded.
“You mean I have descendents that have both Holmes and Moriarty blood in them?” Prof. Moriarty was shocked out of his skull.
In fact Moriarty had carried his skull with him out of Hades and had now dropped it on the art gallery floor.
At that moment British MP Renfield R. Renfield and the quite literally immortal Sherrielock Holmes (she had once consumed Lingzhi supernatural mushrooms on one occasion that had made her immortal) entered the gallery.
“Prof. Moriarty!” Sherrielock exclaimed in surprise as she recognized the ghost.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday October 4th
2022.
Sherrielock Holmes and The White Horse
Sherrielock Holmes and her white horse Excalibur Lightning as they appear in an Edwardian Age photo.
The date was October 3rd 1902.
Exactly 120 years ago.
And the amazing and wonderful Sherrielock Holmes (the lesser known twin sister of world-famous consulting detective Sherlock Holmes) was getting her photo taken by the famous London photographer Wilfrid Rutherford.
She and her white horse Excalibur Lightning.
“I hope your photo of you and Lightning turn out well,” Sherlock remarked as he smoked his pipe.
“I’m sure it will,” Sherrielock smiled.
“I say, Holmes, you know I saw Excalibur Lightning eating some mushrooms this morning along with his hay,” Dr. Watson commented.
“Mushrooms?” Holmes raised an eyebrow.
“Oh,” Sherrielock laughed, “Lightning must have got into some of my Lingzhi Supernatural Mushrooms.”
“Does that mean he’s become immortal like you?” Watson put some black mascara on his gray moustache so it would look black again.
“I don’t know,” Sherrielock shrugged, “I’ll have to ask Louis if a horse eating Lingzhi Supernatural Mushrooms will make him immortal.”
Sherrielock was referring to her husband Dr. Louis Rocher the world-famous French scientist (who unbeknownst to both Sherrielock and her brother Sherlock was in fact the illegitimate son of Holmes’ archenemy Prof. James Moriarty).
A few years ago Dr. Louis prepared a dish using Lingzhi Supernatural Mushrooms for his wife Sherrielock that made her immortal.
“You sure you don’t want Louis to prepare the same dish for you?” Sherrielock asked Sherlock.
“I don’t want to live forever in this body,” Holmes answered, “And immortality through Watson’s literary efforts in The Strand Magazine using his friend Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s name is quite enough for me.”
“As it is for me, Holmes, as it is for me,” Watson acknowledged.
“If that’s the case, good Doctor,” Sherrielock smiled, “Then why are you colouring your gray moustache black using my eye mascara?”.
Watson’s face turned quite red.
“And if Excalibur Lightning becomes immortal,” Sherlock asked his sister, “then what will you two do?”.
Sherrielock suddenly thought she saw the image of the great Serb-American inventor Nikola Tesla appear before her.
Tesla said to her, “Ride to Moscow to save Kyiv and the world. Ride to Moscow to save Kyiv and the world.”
Then the image of Tesla vanished.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday October 3rd
2022.
Carson Cody Albion Private Eye Writes In The First Person
So this woman was sitting in my room when I woke up this morning.
“All your clothes are on,” I said to her.
“And all your clothes are off,” she winked at me.
Damn I hate it when that happens.
“I’m glad to see you’re standing at attention while they play The Star Spangled Banner on the radio,” she smiled.
“Well actually it was the sight of you first thing in the morning that’s made me stand at attention like this,” I answered.
“I was hoping that would be the case,” she smoothed her skirt.
“Do that again,” I said, “and if I was an English nobleman, you’d be able to sing those old Battle Hymn of the Republic lyrics Mine Eyes Have Seen The Glory of The Coming of The Lord.”
“God, you certainly don’t talk like that highly forgettable writer of sasquatch murder mysteries Mister Phil Huston,” her eyes shone like a child’s on Christmas morning.
Needless to say I was rather proud of my North Pole but answered in reply to her comment rather than her eyes, “Thank God for that. But if I ever needed to put myself to sleep rather quickly, it might come in handy to talk and write like Phil Huston.”
“Is there anything you’d like me to do?” The woman asked.
“Yes lie back on the bed and sing Mr. Sandman Bring Me A Dream,” I replied.
“What ever for?” She inquired.
“I want to see who does it better,” I explained, “Me or Neil Gaiman.”
Thirty minutes later she was singing the Carly Simon sung theme song (from the 1977 James Bond film The Spy Who Loved Me) “Nobody Does It Better.”
-A Carson Cody Albion
Detective Story
Written by Christopher
Sunday August 21st
2022.
The Lounge Singer
Cantolina Aguirre the lounge singer
It was May 1949.
And Carson Cody Albion was sitting in a high class cocktail lounge in Los Angeles.
The name of the lounge was The Purple Canary.
Albion wasn’t sure whether there was such a thing as a purple canary.
He thought most canaries were yellow.
But then again up until 1697, most Europeans thought all swans were white.
Then came 1697.
And Dutch explorer Willem de Vlamingh discovered black swans in Australia.
So maybe there are purple canaries.
Perhaps someday one will be found on the moon.
What made him think of the moon just now?
His eyes and ears returned to the singer and the song.
Cantolina Aguirre was singing the song Blue Moon.
When the song was over, Cantolina Aguirre came and sat at Albion’s table.
“Nice of you to sit here,” Albion smiled.
“I’m your contact,” Cantolina explained.
“Contact?” Albion looked puzzled.
“Didn’t Soong Mei-ling hire you to escort weapons from the Aladdin Tea Company Warehouse to the ship Blue Tiger down at the docks?” Cantolina inquired.
Soong Mei-ling was Madame Chiang Kai-shek the First Lady of the Republic of China.
She was the wife of Generalissimo Chiang Kai-shek the President of China.
The Kuomintang Chinese Nationalist government was currently in trouble and there was the possibility that China could fall to Mao Tse-tung’s Communists.
Concerned people across the U.S. were sending arms to Chiang’s government worried that the U.S. government wasn’t doing enough.
“She did,” Carson nodded, “but I was expecting my contact to be Chinese.”
“I was born in Shanghai,” Cantolina answered, “My father worked at the Spanish Consulate in the city.”
“Wow, don’t I have egg on my face,” Albion remarked after a waiter accidentally spilled Egg Foo Yung all over him.
Cantolina gave him the passwords he was to use at both the warehouse and the loading docks for the ship Blue Tiger.
Albion stood up to go on his mission.
“I’ll be working here until 2 AM, ” she said as she got up to return to the stage.
“Do you ever make love to any of your contacts?” Albion asked before leaving.
Cantolina grabbed a napkin and wrote on it with her red lipstick.
She then folded the napkin.
“Here’s the answer,” she said as she handed him the folded napkin, “Don’t open it until you walk through that door again.”
Later after Albion had completed the mission, he returned to The Purple Canary and walked through the door.
He opened and unfolded the napkin to read her red lipstick answer to his question.
ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.
Cantolina noticed his entrance and his unfolding of the napkin.
She immediately began singing the song Blue Moon.
-A Carson Cody Albion Short Story
Written by Christopher
Monday May 2nd 2022.
Carson Cody Albion and The Beauty In The Hotel Room
The Beauty In Carson Cody Albion’s Hotel Room
Carson Cody Albion Private Eye went to London town
And discovered London bridge wasn’t falling down
So he went back to his hotel and what he saw caused no frown
For on his bed was a beautiful woman in a very sexy gown
-A poem written by Christopher
Sunday Night May 1st 2022
The Panther Woman and The God of Surprises
Claudia Simon The Panther Woman
Carson Cody Albion, a private eye then based in New Orleans, was spending April of 1935 visiting New York City.
He was visiting an old college acquaintance of his who had now become an inspector in the New York Police Department.
“Inspector Hennessy,” his secretary brought into her boss’ office the private eye from New Orleans, “a Mr. Carson Cody Albion to see you.”
“Carson, my old friend,” the Inspector rushed to greet him.
They discussed old times and college days.
And how the philosopher Hegel (who they had both studied in the same philosophy course they took) was a major pain in the ass.
However Hegel’s influence on the world was profound in the decade of the 1930s.
Hegel, as interpreted through the lens of the left wing Hegelians particularly Marx, was influencing Bolshevism and Communism.
Hegel, as interpreted through the lens of the right wing Hegelians particularly Nietzsche, was influencing Nazism and Fascism.
Inspector Hennessy was then discusing cases he was working on.
One involved a wild animal walking the streets of New York City.
A black coloured panther with golden green eyes who ripped out the throats of its victims.
The other involved a serial killer dressed as a clown who slashed the throats of his victims.
Beside his victims, he left a fortune cookie that always had the same message, “Be prepared to be surprised by the god of surprises.”
Albion said he’d help Hennessy with the case.
As Albion walked back to his hotel, he passed a tarot card reading room.
A very beautiful young woman dressed in the beautiful coloured blouse and skirt of a gypsy woman stood outside.
“A reading, sir,” she smiled at him.
“Why not?” Said Albion.
He did not believe in tarot cards or crystal balls but he had time to kill.
Interestingly enough the reading sort of matched the case his friend Inspector Hennessy was working on.
When the reading was over, the lovely brunette gypsy woman smiled at him and said, “Remember, sir, it takes a thief to catch a thief.”
Curious statement, Albion thought.
Albion was walking by a Church – Saint Raphael’s- when he noticed the priest locking up.
“Good evening, Father,” Albion said.
“Good evening,” said the priest, “You’re Carson Cody Albion are you not?”.
“Why, yes,” Albion nodded, “You know me?”.
“I have a niece who lives in New Orleans,” the priest explained, “She’s sent me newspaper clippings about your exploits. She knows I have a weakness for detective stories- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes, G.K. Chesterton’s Father Brown and Agatha Christie’s Hercule Poirot.”
“Excellent writers and excellent detectives all of them,” Albion acknowledged.
“Working on a case here in New York?” The priest asked.
Albion mentioned the panther and also the clown serial killer who called himself the God of Surprises.
“This clown serial killer the God of Surprises is a sinister individual,” the priest crossed himself with the Sign of the Cross, “I believe he’s human but yet he’s possesed of a supernatural paranormal power that I believe is demonic in origin.”
“What makes you think that, Father?” Albion was curious.
“I have to go to a hospital to hear confessions but meet me here at the rectory at noon tomorrow,” the priest pointed, “It’s right next to the Church.”
Albion agreed.
At 2 AM Albion woke up.
Feeling restless he decided to go for a walk.
He walked past Saint Raphael’s Church and was surprised to see a moving van out in front.
A moving van in the middle of the night?
At a Church?
The movers were moving Crosses and Crucifixes and statues of Mary and the Saints from the Church into the van.
This is curious, Albion thought.
He looked at the name on the van PILTDOWN AND PEKING MOVERS.
Weird, Albion thought.
The following morning Albion again walked in the direction of the Church.
This time for his noon appointment with the priest rector of Saint Raphael’s at the Church rectory.
He was surprised to see CRIME SCENE yellow tape around the Church building.
Albion figured that possibly the middle of the night movers were in fact burglars and he Albion had neglected to stop them.
“What’s happened here, Hennessy?” Albion asked the inspector when he saw him.
“Well aside from the obvious theft of the Crosses and Crucifixes and statues of Mary and the Saints, the priest Father Lacroix was found dead at the altar with his throat slashed,” Hennessy stated, “along with a fortune cookie carrying the message, BE PREPARED TO BE SURPRISED BY THE GOD OF SURPRISES. Witnesses saw a clown carrying a bloodied knife flee the Church building.”
Hennessy and Albion went to talk to the rectory’s housekeeper to see if she knew if Father Lacroix had any enemies.
The housekeeper, an Irish woman in her mid-50s, sobbed that this clown serial killer the God of Surprises must be demonically possessed.
That’s why the Crosses and Crucifixes and statues of Mary and the Saints were taken out so that the demonic clown serial killer The God of Surprises could enter the Church and kill Father Lacroix.
Indeed it turned out there was no such moving company as PILTDOWN AND PEKING MOVERS.
Albion after helping Hennessy had gone to a local public pool for a swim.
While walking through the pool area he saw this woman.
Albion stopped to look at her.
“You recognize me, monsieur?” the woman spoke with a French accent.
As a matter of fact, he had seen a sketch of her.
In the notebook of one Barnabas Van Helsing a vampire hunter who wasn’t quite as famous as his elder brother Dr. Abraham Van Helsing.
Back in the early 1890s the City of New Orleans had been terrorized by a wild black panther with golden green eyes who killed New Orleans citizens by ripping out their throats.
Van Helsing had caught up with the panther who, the vampire hunter had claimed in his notebook, had shapeshifted into a beautiful woman.
The woman, Van Helsing claimed was an immortal, who turned into a panther on certain nights.
She was a 17th Century French noblewoman named Claudia Simon.
Van Helsing had sketched her picture.
Albion recognized the woman standing in front of him as being the same woman in Barnabas Van Helsing’s sketch.
He also recalled something else.
Something the gypsy woman had said to him yesterday.
It takes a thief to catch a thief.
A couple of hours later a very beautiful woman was walking through a dark neighbourhood.
The sounds of the stilettos on her high heeled shoes clicking the pavement.
The constant pulling up of her coat and adjusting of her skirt.
A clown started to follow her.
He carried a knife.
He walked very stealthily behind her and was about to strike… when the woman suddenly turned and spun around on her heels.
He was surprised.
“You appear to be surprised, oh, God of Surprises,” said the woman with a most exquisite French accent.
She turned into a panther and ripped out his throat.
The clown shouted out several last words before he died.
As Hennessy and Albion wrapped up the investigation, they discovered that the clown was a Jesuit priest named Father Edgar Noeticus who had studied under the French Jesuit priest paleontologist Father Pierre Teilhard de Chardin over in China.
No one was sure when Father Noeticus had left China and when he returned to the U.S.
However after he got his throat ripped out by the panther woman, he shouted out one final last cry, “Someday a Pope shall venerate me the God of Surprises.”
In his right hand as he died he clutched a fortune cookie with the message BE PREPARED TO BE SURPRISED BY THE GOD OF SURPRISES.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday April 22nd
2022.
Klondike Helen
Klondike Helen the belle of Dawson City during the days of the Klondike Gold Rush
She had been born Helen McGarrett (no relation to Steve McGarrett of Hawaii Five-0 fame) in Montreal, Canada in 1875.o
When news of the Klondike Gold Rush in Canada’s northern territory of Yukon spread far and wide throughout North America, Helen headed up to Dawson City (a town built at the confluence of the Klondike and Yukon Rivers) the site of the Gold Rush to seek fame and fortune.
The year was 1899 and a stranger from London England arrived to see Klondike Helen.
And there she was standing in front of the piano in Klondike Jack’s Saloon.
“You’re Miss Helen McGarrett?” The stranger asked.
“I am,” Helen nodded, “Who are you?”.
“I’m Sherlock Holmes,” the pipe smoking man in the deerstalker cap answered.
“The famous London detective?” Helen was astonished, “How did you get here? What are you doing here?”.
“What I am doing here is I’ve been hired by the McGrew family of Liverpool to investigate the death of a family member who died here in Dawson City. A fellow by the name of Dan McGrew. His nickname was Dangerous Dan McGrew. When the family received word of his death, they said he was shot in an argument with some gold miner over a woman known as Lou. I’m here to investigate the truth of his death. As for how I got here… well I happen to know a fellow named Ferdinand Graf von Zeppelin a retired German army officer. He’s just invented an airship and didn’t want any Germans to die in the testing of it. So along with an English balloonist and myself, we travelled in this airship across the Atlantic and across the Arctic and then across Canada’s northern terrain until we arrived here. We’ve arrived safely. How we’ll make out in the return journey home is yet to be seen.”
“And you think I know something about the death of Dan McGrew?” Helen inquired.
“I was told you’re a friend of the woman known as Lou,” Holmes explained, “By the way, where is Lou? No one seems to know where she is.”
“She’s dead,” Helen answered, “Staked through the heart.”
“Staked through the heart?” Holmes was surprised.
“She was a vampiress,” said Helen, “And Lou turned Dan McGrew into a vampire as he lay dying from the gunshot wounds inflicted by the jealous miner husband’s gun. So McGrew died twice. First being shot by the jealous miner. And then being staked through the heart after he became a vampire.”
“Good God,” said Holmes.
“Good void,” said a miner who was trying to write a science-fiction poem about the Klondike.
“Who staked them through the heart?” Holmes re-lit his pipe.
“The same man,” Helen replied, “Barnabas Van Helsing. The younger brother of the famous Dr. Abraham Van Helsing.”
“Well,” Holmes blew smoke rings, “I suppose I better tell the McGrew family the original story about the shooting involving the jealous gold miner and the wife of the jealous gold miner- the woman known as Lou. Talk of vampires and vampiresses might send me to the looney bin.”
Holmes left the saloon and walked out into the night to his waiting Zeppelin airship for the cold journey home.
Another man approached Klondike Helen.
“You’re Klondike Helen I presume?” The man asked.
“Who wants to know?” Helen looked into his eyes.
“The name’s Van Helsing,” the man tipped his fedora hat, “Dracul Van Helsing. I was looking at my great-great-uncle Barnabas Van Helsing’s photo collection the other day and your picture in black and white was there. So I travelled back in time using this Houdini-Pantages-Tesla-Welles-Lamarr magic lantern so that I can take a colour photo of you.”
“Pantages did you say?” Klondike Helen blinked, “There’s a waiter in town here called Alexander Pantages.”
“He was one of those who helped develop this time travelling magic lantern,” Van Helsing explained, “along with the magician Harry Houdini and the great Serb-American inventor Nikola Tesla. Years later a brilliant young director and actor named Orson Welles also worked on it. The finishing touches were finally completed by a brilliant actress and inventor named Hedy Lamarr who finally made it fully operational.”
Dracul Van Helsing then took a colour photo of Klondike Helen.
“Anything else?” Klondike Helen asked.
“I’d like to make out with you,” said Van Helsing.
They went up to Klondike Helen’s room and got down on the bed.
As they made out, they were unbeknownst to the fact that the ghost of Orson Welles was also in the room sitting in a chair and eating some take-out food that he had brought with him from Lydo Chinese Food and Delivery in London in the year 2022.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 21st
2022.
Francis: Come On Do The Pachamama With Him
Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster’s vision of the actress who will play Pachamama in the Martin Scorsese made film about the life of the Inca earth mother goddess who is a red dragon that lives in the flames under the Earth but is able to shapeshift into a beautiful woman who walks on the earth or lives in the sky above the earth
Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster got a premonition that director Martin Scorsese was going to make a film about Pachamama the Inca earth mother goddess that satanic AntiPope Francis was going to consecrate all of humanity and in particular Russia and Ukraine to (although he was claiming it was to the Virgin Mary).
Then Michelangelo got a vision of the actress who would play Pachamama in the Martin Scorsese film.
Michelangelo’s lobster tank exploded when he saw the vision.
. . .
Jeffrey the otter had somehow managed to stumble into DARPA headquarters after having drunk too many bottles of Elon Musk’s Mars Project Green Minnow Beer.
Jeffrey put on the radio where the DARPA wireless was picking up secret radio transmissions from the Vatican.
The radio transmissions were playing a song that Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) had secretly recorded a couple of years ago.
The song was to the tune of Kylie Minogue’s song The Loco-Motion.
Jeffrey heard Bergoglio sing,
“Everybody’s doin’ a brand new dance now
(Come on baby do the Pachamama)
I know you’ll get to like it if you give it a chance now
(Come on baby do the Pachamama) …
… You gotta swing your hips now…
Come on baby do the Pachamama with me…”
. . .
And tomorrow everybody would be doing the Pachamama with Pope Francis as Francis would be consecrating the world, the church, humanity and Russia and Ukraine to Pachamama (but doing so under the guise that he was doing it to Mary) in union with all the bishops of the world.
Meanwhile as the Set Enterprises’ long suffering janitor was busy mopping up the mess left by yet another of Michelangelo’s exploded lobster tanks, the psychic crustacean had yet another vision.
Actor/director Mel Gibson was reading the story of the statue of Our Lady of Copacabana.
Francisco Tito Yupanqui (1550-1616) an amateur Inca sculptor and a descandant of Huayna Capac (1464-1524) who had been the third Sapa Inca (Emperor) of the Inca Empire (which lasted from 1438 to 1533) desired to carve a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary.
He carved many wooden statues but was unsatisfied with the result.
On February 2nd 1582 the Virgin Mary appeared to Francisco Tito Yupanqui with a message.
Francisco Tito Yupanqui used the vision to carve his next statue.
Howver this statue somehow wound up in a river.
It was found by the priest of the village of Copacabana a year later on February 2nd 1583 and was dedicated in the church there.
Today that statue of the Virgen de Copacabana is the Patron Saint of Bolivia.
Mel Gibson recalled that prior to 2019, the message Our Lady of Copacabana gave to Francisco Tito Yupanqui was found in many accounts on the Net.
After 2019 the message was scrubbed and erased from the Net.
What was the message of Our Lady of Copacabana to Francisco Tito Yupanqui?
“I know there are some among your people who still worship the old goddess Pachamama. Stop worshipping her. She is a demon.”
Of course in October of 2019, Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) brought a statue of Pachamama into the Vatican Gardens and later into the presence of the High Altar of Saint Peter’s Basilica itself.
Thus the Virgin Mary’s warning about Pachamama being a demon suddenly disappeared.
. . .
Father Aidan Bury Saint Edmunds the Vicar of Saint Genevieve’s Anglo-Catholic C. of E. Parish in West London was having a discussion with one of his parishioners Amadeus Emanon about the text of Pope Francis’ proposed consecration of humanity, Russia and Ukraine to Mary (?).
Said Father Saint Edmunds, “I noticed MP Renfield’s friend a Calgary based geopolitical analyst says that most of the text is just a rehash of globalist, radical environmentalist and Communist Marxist-Leninist crap and propaganda. In other words just a rehash of everything that Francis has said in every official document and major statement he has released since the start of his so-called pontificate.”
“What about the words of Consecration itself?” Amadeus asked.
“Here’s where it gets interesting,” Father Saint Edmunds answered, “At one point it says in the English text “Queen of Heaven, restore God’s peace to the world”. Now as you know many Protestants object to the Catholic description of Mary as Queen of Heaven because of the passages in Jeremiah condemning worship of the Queen of Heaven that are to be found in Jeremiah 7:18 and Jeremiah 44: 17-25. Interestingly enough though that title Queen of Heaven for Ashtoreth in the ancient Assyrian and Babylonian languages was actually rendered Queen of The Land In The Sky. It was translated Queen of Heaven into Hebrew and then into Greek and then into Latin and then into English as Queen of Heaven but since the time of Christ while Heaven might be regarded metaphorically as the Land In The Sky, Heaven is regarded by the Church as the abode of God and the Saints in a realm beyond time and space. The Land In The Sky is a very spatial/temporal term while Heaven since the time of Christ refers to a realm beyond the spatial/temporal. Thus Mary called Queen of Heaven is actually a very metaphysical term while Queen of the Land In The Sky which is what Ashtoreth was actually called in the Assyrian and Babylonian languages is very much a term associated with this universe i.e. this creation. And worship of the creation is idolatry or paganism.”
“Interesting,” Amadeus acknowledged.
“Here’s where it gets even more interesting, the English text says (Queen of) Heaven but the Spanish, Portuguese and Italian texts are rendered differently. What’s called Heaven in English is rendered “tierra del Cielo” in Spanish, “terra do Ceu” in Portuguese and “terra del Cielo” in Italian. All of those terms roughly translate to Earth In The Sky or Land In The Sky. And who goes by that title Queen of The Land In The Sky? Other than Ashtoreth in the ancient Assyrian and Babylonian religions? The Pachamama demon. The land in the sky is one of the Pachamama’s domains. “Tierra del Cielo” is an official Pachamama title. It is “wenu mapu” in the Mapuche language and religion.”
“So Francis is effectively consecrating the world, the church, humanity and specifically Russia and Ukraine to the demon Pachamama?” Amadeus was horrified.
“That’s right,” Father Aidan Bury Saint Edmunds nodded.
“What do you think this will cause?” Amadeus wiped his brow with his handkerchief.
“Most likely either a nuclear World War III or the appearance of the Antichrist on the global stage or both,” Father Aidan Bury Saint Edmunds answered.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday March 24th
2022
Aphrodite, Los Angeles and The Munich Agreement
It was the evening of Thursday September 29th 1938.
The Greek goddess Aphrodite was waiting in the apartment of Los Angeles Private Eye Carson Cody Albion.
Aphrodite had hired Albion to find the giant sea shell from which she had been born on the island of Cyprus.
The sea shell had been stolen from the Paphos Museum on the island of Cyprus last year.
Rumour had it that it had been stolen on the orders of a Hollywood producer.
Aphrodite waiting for Carson Cody Albion Private Eye
“Did you find my birth shell?” Aphrodite asked Albion.
“I did,” Albion took off his trench coat and fedora hat, “David O. Selznick had the shell cut up and turned into pearl earrings. So I’m afraid all the bits of your shell are now gone with the wind.”
“But my birth shell was a cockle shell and not an oyster shell,” Aphrodite pointed out.
“Really?” Albion blinked, “I think Selznick better have the prescription checked on his glasses.”
The Greek goddess Aphrodite had the radio on.
“An agreement has been signed in Munich between Germany, France, Italy and Britain handing the Sudetenland over from Czechoslovakia to Germany. British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain called the Munich Agreement “Peace in our time.” The Czechoslovak government naturally protested the deal. Germany’s Fuhrer Adolf Hitler referred to the Czechoslovak government as a small fringe minority with unacceptable views.”
“I imagine my pen pal in the William Shakespeare Appreciation Society won’t be so happy about this,” Albion poured both Aphrodite and himself some martinis.
“Who’s your pen pal in the William Shakespeare Appreciation Society?” Aphrodite asked as she took the martini.
“A backbench British Conservative MP who once served as a a cabinet minister in both Liberal and Conservative cabinets,” Albion answered, “A fellow by the name of Winston Churchill. A person who actually does his own research and doesn’t believe everything the government and the media tells him.”
Albion squeezed the hell out of a lemon and then threw it in the garbage.
“Holy Don Quixote,” Albion noted, “That’s one sour fruit.”
The garbage can was below an old CN Rail poster from Canada.
“Churchill?” Aphrodite sipped her martini.
“His opponents call him a conspiracy theorist,” Albion noted, “for believing that the German Nazi Party wants to conquer and rule the world.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday January 30th
2022.
Tamara and Pamela
Tamara and Pamela: Going our way, Mr. Albion?
The year was 1937.
The city was Los Angeles Californa.
And walking down the street was Carson Cody Albion Private Eye.
When suddenly the back door of a very large car opened and two beautiful young women greeted him:
“Going our way, Mr. Albion?”.
“I’m always going your way, Tamara and Pamela,” Albion answered.
Albion got into the car.
Another car was parked on the side of the street.
Its backseat occupant was one Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau.
He asked the car’s driver (who was the chauffeur to the German Consul in Los Angeles), “Was that the private eye Carson Cody Albion?”.
“It was,” the chauffeur nodded.
“Merde,” Kohler spoke the only French word he knew, “Another car picked him up before we could.”
Carson Cody Albion Private Eye had fun the rest of the day.
Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau did not.
To Be Continued.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday October 11th
2021.
Dracul Van Helsing 
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