Renfield, A Disembodied Head, A Missing Peace Prize and Welles’ Gatsby MacBeth
Renfield, A Disembodied Head, A Missing Peace Prize and Welles’ Gatsby MacBeth
It was evening and British MP Renfield R. Renfield was once again on Skype talking to his friend Amadeus Emanon who was in Australia.
Amadeus was part of an international group of volunteers working to rescue koalas, kangaroos and other wildlife from the wildfires that were currently raging in that country.
“Some fire fighters and rescue volunteers captured some photos of an unusual sight today,” Amadeus mentioned.
“Oh, and what was that?” Renfield asked.
“It was photos of the flaming disembodied head of a Jesuit priest going around setting fire to trees,” Amadeus answered.
“That is a very unique and unusual form of arson,” Renfield used his Sherlockian powers of deductive reasoning to reach that conclusion.
“Angelique,” Amadeus referred to his girlfriend, “captured a video of it.”
Amadeus showed Renfield the video.
As flames of fire came forth from the disembodied head, the Jesuit said, “Survival of the fittest. Jump start the next evolutionary leap. Koalas and kangaroos won’t help the Cosmos evolve towards the Omega Point.”
“Makes you wonder if this Omega Point is worth evolving to,” Renfield commented as he took a swig of whisky.
. . .
The news video clip was of Donald Trump at a campaign event in Toledo, Ohio the night before.
Trump told his supporters, “I’m going to tell you about the Nobel Peace Prize, I’ll tell you about that. I made a deal, I saved a country and I just heard that the head of that country is getting the Nobel Peace Prize for saving the country. I said, ‘What, did I have something to do with it?’. Yeah, but you know, that’s the way it is. As long as we know, that’s all that matters… I saved a big war, I’ve saved a couple of them.”
Trump was stating that he deserved the Nobel Peace Prize for ending the war between Ethiopia and Eritrea.
Not Ethiopian Prime Minister Abiy Ahmed, 43, the man who actually ended the war.
The U.S. influence in the peace talks was minimal.
And so Donald Trump was making a whopper of a claim.
Probably the biggest whopper of a claim since then Prime Minister Brian Mulroney of Canada (the biggest most pompous and most arrogant asshole that Canadian politics has ever produced) made the whopper of a claim back in 1990 that he was the man single handedly responsible for the dismantling of the Berlin Wall in Europe and the ending of apartheid in South Africa.
Totally ignoring the efforts of Mikhail Gorbachev, Ronald Reagan and Pope John Paul II in the former event and the efforts of Nelson Mandela and F.W. De Klerk in the other.
. . .
The ghost of Orson Welles (who along with Winston Churchill’s ghost was one of two spirit advisors to Renfield R. Renfield) sat in a comfortable arm chair in the Set Estate mansion in West London sipping a glass of spectral red wine while Set’s cat Nefertiti Galore was dining on smoked oysters and vodka from her cat dish.
The ghost of Orson Welles was contemplating directing a new film- a roaring 1920s version of MacBeth in which MacBeth would appear as a Great Gatsby style figure and Lady MacBeth would come across as an even more narcissistic (than she was in Fitzgerald’s novel) version of Daisy Buchanan- one with severe psychopathic and homicidal tendencies.
Welles imagined MacBeth’s first meeting with the 3 Witches- not on a Scottish heath but in the grand drawing room of an elegant mansion on a colossal Long Island estate.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday January 10th
2020.
Q’ orianka Kilcher Is Renfield’s Favourite Environmentalist
Q’ orianka Kilcher Is Renfield’s Favourite Environmentalist
British MP Renfield R. Renfield was back in the cozy comfort of his Tewkesbury Bed and Breakfast after an extensive night of door-to-door campaigning the evening before tomorrow’s UK General Election.
“So, how did it go?” His friend Amadeus asked as he ate a strawberry jam covered crumpet.
“It went fine until the very last house,” Renfield answered, “when I dropped all my cue cards. The voter finally closed the door on me by the time I got all my cue cards together in the right order again.”
Taking a cue from British Prime Minister Boris Johnson and his British Conservative Party TV ad parodying that famous scene from the 2003 Richard Curtis directed film Love Actually (that starred Hugh Grant) where some shy love struck man finally professes his love to his now married (to his best friend) woman of his dreams by appearing at her door on Christmas Eve and using cue cards to express his love, Renfield decided to use the same technique on his last night of campaigning.
He certainly earned a great deal of money this evening as most people gave him a quid and told him to “bugger off”.
Renfield gave Amadeus his opinion of a recent test flight of a sea plane that happened this week in the Canadian province of British Columbia.
An old late 1950s De Havilland sea plane was fitted with an electric motor and ran its entire flight using electricity.
Harbour Air the Vancouver based company that successfully conducted the 1st all electric sea plane flight was hoping to make its entire fleet of sea planes run on electricity rather than fossil fuels by 2022.
“It’s innovation like this that is going to reduce fossil fuel use and carbon emissions and help the climate and environment, ” Renfield explained, “not the totalitarian Marxist style one world government by 2030 in the name of sustainable development that’s being promoted by the United Nations, George Soros, Jeffrey Sachs, U2 bonehead Bono and Pope Francis in the name of alleviating climate change. Of course apocalyptic soothsayers of doom like Greta Thunberg are causing more people to embrace the UN 2030 Sustainable Development Goals Agenda that if imposed would bring all of humanity under a draconian and despotic future. Orwell’s 1984 will then be complete in 2030.”
“Did you know that Greta Thunberg was named TIME Magazine’s Person of The Year today?” Amadeus asked.
“Shit,” said Renfield.
The MP sipped his hot tea.
“Still I shouldn’t be surprised,” Renfield acknowledged, “an age of hysteria like the age we’re living in is going to impose its accolades on hysterical people.”
“I suppose that’s true,” Amadeus nodded.
“You know,” Renfield gazed into the fire place, “For the past 10 years, the woman who’s probably Hollywood’s most talented actress and yet also one of its least known has been promoting the message of climate change and getting off fossil fuels. She’s been constantly doing this since 2009 when she was acclaimed for her role playing the Hawaiian Crown Princess Ka’iulani in the 2009 film Princess Ka’iulani. Her first breakthrough performance came back in 2005 when she played Pocahontas alongside Colin Farrell’s Captain John Smith in the 2005 film The New World. The first car she ever bought was an electric car long long before Elon Musk ever developed and marketed his Teslas. She makes her own dresses and gowns all made out of recycled materials. And has her own small fashion line doing the same thing.
She goes down to Peru (her father’s ancestral homeland) continuously to help the indigenous peoples living down there. She led a demonstration against Peru’s then President Alan Garcia after his government had massacred indigenous peoples in the Amazon region for daring to stand up to multinational companies in Peru wanting to exploit the region for its resources. And she led that demonstration in Peru. She was the first public figure to expose that massacre to the entire world. She was also arrested twice in the U.S. for demonstrating against Garcia and the U.S. oil companies he was in bed with. Once chaining herself to the White House fence on an occasion in 2011 when Barack Obama met with the genocidal Garcia. She has constantly spoken out on climate change and issues affecting the world’s indigenous peoples. And always does it in a calm, gentle and rational manner. She has an inner strength about her that’s stronger than any outburst of anger or grumpiness. Her gentleness backed by that inner strength cannot really be fought or argued against. So much more effective than someone who comes across as a teenaged poster child for someone desperately in need of taking anger management classes. And Q’orianka has been doing this for 10 years now. How long has this Greta Thunberg been talking about climate change? Just over a year. So why have most people heard of Greta and not Q’orianka? Probably because Q’orianka is an indigenous woman descended from the Quechua peoples of Peru who helped build the Inca Empire and were master mathematicians, architects and astronomers. While Greta on the other hand is white and came from Sweden the first country to give the world pornography and gender re-assignment surgery. We know for all this talk of diversity in the year 2019 where the real power still lies.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday December 11th
2019.
Q’ orianka Kilcher at the 2nd Annual Legacy Charity Series Gala In Santa Monica California
Rita Hayworth’s 101st Birthday
Rita Hayworth’s 101st Birthday
Happy Birthday, Rita Hayworth (born Margarita Carmen Cansino)
Haiku For Rita Hayworth
Actress and dancer
Was queen of the silver screen
Enchanting goddess
Margarita Carmen Cansino, Orson Welles and Jack Benny
Margarita Carmen Cansino, Orson Welles and Jack Benny
The Norse trickster god Loki sat at the controls of the CERN Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland.
He had just finished sampling a month’s supply of Chemical of The Day Club (as opposed to Book of The Month Club) samples sent to him by a friend in Australia who went by the cheery sounding name of Uncle Ernie.
With Uncle Ernie’s Chemicals of The Day fully in control of his mind, Loki was now creating many a time warp down at CERN.
With Liberace and Olivia Newton John performing a duet of the song Let’s Do The Time Warp Again (from The Rocky Horror Picture Show) in the background, Loki was doing much temporal mischief.
The ghost of Orson Welles (who currently lived as a spectral guest in the colossal London mansion of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set where, along with the ghost of Sir Winston Churchill, he served as a spirit advisor to British MP Renfield R. Renfield) found himself sent back in time to the year 1935.
Tears came to Welles’ spectral eyes when he saw the young Margarita Carmen Cansino (who was later forced by Hollywood studio producers to change her name to Rita Hayworth) standing there.
“I should have been a more loving husband to her,” Welles’ ghost sobbed as he ordered a bottle of Chardonnay from the studio gopher.
“I can’t believe the nerve of that white guy who wanted to audition for the role of Charlie Chan,” Margarita Carmen Cansino shook her head.
“Would that have been Warner Oland?” Welles asked.
“No,” Rita shook her head, “Some non-talented entity from up in Canada who had listed High School Drama Teacher in Vancouver on his resume.”
Welles’ ghost went over to the next studio where the great American comic actor Jack Benny was holding auditions for his next movie.
Some obviously white guy wearing blackface stood on stage at the microphone.
“Hi,” said the man, “My name is Justin Trudeau and I’d like to audition for the role of Rochester.”
“Someone get that bum out of here,” Benny remarked.
Cerberus the 3-headed dog from the Underworld of Hades chased the Rochester wannabe off stage.
Welles began returning to the year 2019 when Loki hit another control at CERN.
As Welles whizzed through the year 1968, he encountered a newspaper boy shouting, “Read all about it. Peter Sellers beats out a Canadian for the role of Hrundi V. Bakshi in the movie The Party.”
Welles went back momentarily to the year 1965 where Mel Brooks the Executive Producer of the TV series Get Smart was remarking, “I don’t even want that Drama teacher auditioning for this role never mind getting it,” as a KAOS villain shouts, “Not Claw, Craw!”.
Welles eventually landed back in 2019 where he arrived in the Set Mansion living room as Amadeus was watching the 2016 remake of The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday September 21st
2019.
Legacy of The Baskervilles
Legacy of The Baskervilles
“I always wanted to do a movie based on a Sherlock Holmes story,” said the ghost of Orson Welles as he entered Baskerville Hall.
“And you’re thinking of the Hound of The Baskervilles?” Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing asked.
“I am,” Welles lit himself a spectral cigar.
“Of course that story has been done several times in film format,” Van Helsing noted, “you will have to do something that makes yours stand out from the rest.”
“Precisement,” Welles pulled out a bottle of spectral red wine from one overcoat pocket and a glass from the other, “and I’m just the man to do it.”
“I would have to agree,” Van Helsing nodded.
“So I hear Baskerville Hall is now owned by Britain’s Heritage Trust,” Welles poured himself a glass of spectral red wine.
“It is,” Van Helsing acknowledged, “it was purchased recently by Dashwood Forrest the owner of The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London. He donated it to Heritage Trust to get a big charity donation receipt to help him with a big tax deduction.”
“A most astute decision,” Welles sipped his red wine.
“So, have you given much thought to how you intend to make your adaptation of The Hound of The Baskervilles different?” Van Helsing asked.
“Let us go into the living room of Baskerville Hall,” Welles suggested, “perhaps seeing that large spacious room will give me some ideas.”
Welles and Van Helsing entered the living room.
And there stood….
The Welsh vampiress Morgana.
“As you know,” Morgana spoke, “Britain’s new Prime Minister Boris Johnson recently appointed me Deputy Home Secretary In Charge of Midnight Security. And both of you are trespassing on Heritage Trust property.”
Welles’ ghost made haste out of the living room and out of Baskerville Hall on the off chance that Morgana might sic the ghost of the Hound of the Baskervilles on him.
Only Dracul Van Helsing remained.
The Welsh vampiress took the vampire hunter over her knee and spanked him.
Welles’ ghost walked around the Baskerville Hall grounds and finished his spectral bottle of spectral red wine and smoked his entire spectral box of spectral cigars.
He thought he better go back inside and see what happened to Van Helsing.
There was Van Helsing on the living room floor having tantric sex with Morgana.
Welles turned and hastily closed the door behind him (forgetting that he could walk through doors and walls).
“Well,” Welles took out a piece of spectral chewing gum, “after seeing that scene, that should give me no shortage of ideas on how to make my film adaptation of The Hound of the Baskervilles different from everybody else’s.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday August 7th
2019.
Orson Welles’ Ghost Views The Only Scene Ever Filmed For Roman Polanski’s Wuthering Heights
The ghost of Orson Welles was admiring a small sculpture of the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow that the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set had recently purchased from the Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery.
The sculpture showed the Headless Horseman and his pumpkin head riding a black horse while the schoolteacher Ichabod Crane is seen getting run over by one of Santa’s reindeer who, after drinking too much Kickapoo Joy Juice, mistook Halloween night for Christmas Eve and was venturing in the forest near Sleepy Hollow following the Headless Horseman and his black horse and his orange pumpkin head mistaking the latter for Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer’s red shiny nose.
“What a delightfully eclectic and eccentric sculpture,” Welles’ ghost remarked as he looked at it while sampling a glass of spectral red wine.
Welles had been informed by British MP Renfield R. Renfield that Boris Johnson (the former Foreign Secretary of Britain) had purchased a retirement gift for British Prime Minister Theresa May at the Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery.
The gift was an 18th Century portrait painting of an 18th Century Irish Pirate of the Caribbean Captain Kerry Donegal.
Welles had recently met the ghost of Kerry Donegal in person when Renfield had brought him home after a night of carousing at the Oscar Wilde Pub.
Welles decided to go down to the Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in person to see what other great treasures were available there.
The door to the gallery was opened by Dashwood Forrest’s Irish manservant Mulligan the Irish zombie who was undergoing his own personal zombie apocalypse after having drunk too much Guinness stout and Jameson’s Irish whiskey the night before.
“Excuse the hand on the floor,” Mulligan remarked after his right hand came apart at the wrist and fell on the floor.
As Mulligan tried to re-attach his right hand to the rest of his right arm, Welles’ ghost was greeted by art gallery owner and curator Dashwood Forrest who had a martini in his own hand.
“You know the trouble with being dead is you’re decomposing all the time,” Mulligan the Irish zombie remarked as his right ear fell off.
“Mulligan never did have an ear for music,” Forrest invited Welles into his office, “but do come into my office. I have something that a great film director such as yourself would be interested in.”
As Mulligan managed to find his right ear below a portrait of Vincent Van Gogh, Dashwood Forrest closed the office door behind him and Welles.
“Let me run the film projector,” said Forrest, “for I have here on film the only scene ever completed and shot for a film adaptation of Wuthering Heights that Roman Polanski intended to make back in 1989 but financing for the movie was pulled at the last moment. Polanski was setting his version of Wuthering Heights in the late 20th Century. This was a scene between Heathcliff and Cathy.”
The projector ran and the Polanski 20th Century Wuthering Heights scene between Heathcliff and Cathy- a single still shot appeared:
“Where’s Heathcliff?” Welles asked.
“Heathcliff is the old car in the photo,” Forrest answered, “Polanski intended the movie as a cross between Emily Bronte’s Wuthering Heights and Stephen King’s Christine.”
“Now I’ve seen everything,” Welles looked stonefaced, “Jack Nicholson must have sent Polanski plenty of California grass that Roman smoked before he came up with the idea for this picture.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday May 30th
2019.
Harvey Tallbanger and Daniel Craig
After his successful spying mission at the Vladivostok Summit between Vladimir Putin and King Jong-un, the 6 foot 8 invisible Welsh pooka bunny rabbit Harvey Tallbanger returned to London.
He went to the Hare and Hound Pub.
Standing inside the doorway of the Hare and Hound Pub was the stuffed original Hound of The Baskervilles who had been found a few years ago.
“I see the hound but where’s the hare?” Harvey Tallbanger asked as he sat up at the bar.
“You know, I’m sick of people asking me that…” the pubkeeper looked up from behind the bar and stopped, “Say, who’s there?”.
“Harvey Tallbanger,” the 6 foot 8 bunny rabbit replied, “I’m invisible. But I do have money to pay.”
The rabbit brought visible British £ currency out of his invisible blue denim coveralls.
“Oh God, I’ve gone insane!” The pubkeeper said.
“No, you haven’t,” Harvey flashed his most attractive invisible smile, “if you were, you’d be in the Oval Office right now with one hand smoothing down your ridiculous looking toupee and your other hand with its finger on the nuclear button when it isn’t busy tweeting on Twitter.”
“What will you have, my invisible friend?” The pubkeeper asked.
“A Tequila Sunrise, please,” the pooka answered.
The pubkeeper made a tequila sunrise and handed it to the tall bunny rabbit.
Actor Daniel Craig and actress Naomie Harris entered the pub.
“Oh, wow, James Bond and Miss Moneypenny!” Harvey exclaimed, “My hero and my heroine!”.
“Who was that?” The acting duo asked at the same time.
“Don’t mind him,” the pubkeeper answered, “He’s invisible.”
Bond and Miss Moneypenny (as Harvey thought of them) both ordered pints of the local draft.
“What?” Harvey was incredulous, “No martini shaken not stirred?”.
“That’s only in the movies,” Daniel Craig answered.
“How disappointing fiction is from reality,” Harvey remarked as he sat next to the poster of Claude Rains as The Invisible Man.
“Isn’t there any way people can see you?” Naomie Harris asked.
“My creator Dr. Cadbury Rocher informs me that if people drink a Harvey Wallbanger, they can see me,” the pooka replied.
“What’s in a Harvey Wallbanger?” Craig asked.
“1 1/2 ounces of vodka, 3 ounces of orange juice and half an ounce of Galliano,” Harvey replied.
“I should try making one of those,” the pubkeeper remarked and proceeded to do just that.
“So after Bond 25, you’ll be sailing off into the 007 sunset,” Harvey said over his sunrise.
“I will indeed,” Craig admitted.
“Howdy, Bartender,” a man with a Texas drawl entered the pub.
“Oh no,” the pubkeeper shook his head, “The idiot who keeps asking me the same question day after day.”
“Say, bartender,” the Texan pointed towards the stuffed Hound of The Baskervilles, “for a place called The Hare and Hound, I can see the hound but where’s the hare?”.
“Try one of these,” the pubkeeper placed a Harvey Wallbanger in front of the Texan.
The Texan took a few sips of the Wallbanger and then pointed at Harvey sitting on the other side of the bar, “It’s the hare. It’s the hare.”
“What?” Daniel Craig and Naomie Harris both looked in the direction of the invisible entity.
“It’s my shiny locks,” the bunny rabbit flashed an invisible grin to Daniel Craig, Naomie Harris and the pubkeeper, “and all because I use Johnson’s Baby Shampoo.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday April 26th
2019.
Miss Moneypenny had many adventures in life and someday she’d meet an invisible bunny rabbit.
Kraken Uhluhtc Causes Venezuela Electrical Blackout
The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec was sitting in her Mexico City penthouse apartment having a long distance phone conversation discussing the crisis in Venezuela with British MP Renfield R. Renfield.
“Do you have any idea what’s causing this massive electricity and power blackout that’s been going on in Venezuela since last Thursday?” Renfield asked.
Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro and the U.S. government had both been blaming the other for causing the blackout.
“My sources tell me it’s Uhluhtc that’s causing the problem,” Qonzilqointec answered.
“And who’s Uhluhtc?” Renfield helped himself to a dish of calamari in front of him.
“Uhluhtc is a kraken that recently rose from the bottom of the Caribbean Sea a couple of years ago,” Qonzilqointec answered.
“I see,” Renfield added some Jamaican Hot Sauce to his calamari, “and what caused him to rise?”.
“North Korean leader Kim Jong-un reading aloud a passage from a medieval Korean edition of The Necronomicon by radio and loudspeaker to a North Korean ship named The Red Scorpion that was sailing in the Caribbean at the time,” the Aztec vampire princess replied.
“Really?” Renfield helped himself to some Korean dumplings and fried scorpion, “Interesting how this information is sort of forming a Jungian synchronicity with what I’m having on my lunchtime menu.”
“One of my drones spotted Uhluhtc attacking electrical transformers throughout Venezuela,” Qonzilqointec added.
“Any idea why he’s doing this?” Renfield found a toy figure of Godzilla as the prize in his box of children’s cereal.
“None whatsoever,” Qonzilqointec smoothed her dress and watched another one of her carrier pigeon shaped drones returning.
. . .
Donald Trump was receiving a briefing from the National Security Agency as his English butler and valet Lexington poured tea.
“Um, is it appropriate for him to be here?” The NSA operative pointed towards Lexington.
“That’s all right,” Trump shrugged, “he’s got high level security clearance.”
“Your English butler and valet has high-level security clearance?” The NSA operative was astounded.
“Hey,” Trump helped himself to a hot buttered crumpet, “if I can get high-level security clearance for my daughter and my son-in-law, I can get high-level security clearance for my English butler and valet.”
“Fuck everybody and let’s build a Trump casino in Moscow. Fuck everybody and let’s build a Trump casino in Moscow,” Trump’s pet Norwegian blue parrot squawked from inside his cage.
Trump was currently working on getting high-level security clearance for his parrot.
“Anyways we wiretapped a conversation New York Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez recently had in a Washington DC restaurant with Lev Tomi the Secretary-General of the UN Secretariat On The Environment and Climate Change,” the NSA operative explained.
“Bully for you, we need surveillance to find out what these Communist saboteurs are up to,” Trump accidentally pushed the Record button on his Huawei smart phone.
“They were discussing the Green New Deal,” the NSA operative said.
“I noticed,” Trump remarked as he drank his cup of Earl Grey Tea, “that even British MP Renfield R. Renfield who supports AOC’S plans for a single user pay national public health care system says that AOC “is out to lunch like most leftists are” when it comes to the subject of climate change.”
“Anyhow the Department of Homeland Security recently uncovered frightening information with regards to Lev Tomi,” the NSA operative read from his briefs as he dressed down to his briefs since it was rather hot in the Oval Office.
“And what was that?” Trump seeing the NSA operative dressed down to his briefs brought back memories of last year’s private one-on-one encounter with Vladimir Putin in which no aides nor translators were present.
“That Lev Tomi is in fact a vampire,” the NSA operative’s glasses steamed up, “and in his mortal life had been the Russian Communist Revolutionary Leon Trotsky. Trotsky did not die on the night of August 20th/21st 1940 succumbing to his ice axe wounds delivered by a Stalinist NKVD assassin as the history books teach us. Instead he was turned into a vampire by the Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec.”
“Aztec?” Trump felt a sudden craving for enchiladas, “They’re Mexican aren’t they?”.
“That is correct,” the NSA operative answered.
“Then I’m right to build that damned wall,” Trump pounded his fist on his desk.
“Begging your pardon, sir,” Lexington removed the Gloucester cheese from the table, “but if this Qonzilqointec is a vampiress, then she can just turn into a vampire bat and fly over the wall.”
“What a bummer,” Trump grimaced.
“That’s exactly what Putin said to me afterwards,” squawked the parrot, “that’s exactly what Putin said to me afterwards.”
. . .
Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing thought back to the 1941 film Sundown with Gene Tierney and George Sanders that he had been watching for the first time on YouTube early Sunday morning when his BBC app sounded a five second long musical note indicating a breaking news bulletin.
That was when he first heard about the tragic Ethiopian Airlines plane crash from Addis Ababa Ethiopia to Nairobi Kenya that had killed all 157 people on board.
Today after watching the news he found out that 18 Canadians had been aboard the plane including a Carleton University professor from Ottawa, a family of six from Brampton Ontario, an environmentalist from Winnipeg Manitoba and a young mother from Edmonton Alberta along with her 5-year-old daughter.
There was also an assistant pastor from the City of Calgary (who also worked as an accountant at Calgary City Hall) killed- a man that Dracul Van Helsing had personally met on one occasion.
In another connection to the City of Calgary, the pilot of the plane had an aunt who lived in Calgary.
In this interconnected world of the 21st Century, tragedy now connected all corners of the globe.
Gene Tierney in the movie Sundown 1941.
A movie that was set in the border region between Kenya and Ethiopia.
A movie that had as its premise the importance of Africa to world geopolitics and how Africa served as the pivotal point of the interconnectivity of the world.
It was while watching this film, a breaking BBC News bulletin on a tablet app showed that the premise still held true in the year 2019.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday March 11th
2019.
Imhotep: Behind the Hammer of Film
Imhotep Pontifex Ra ran a small souvenir store in Rome not far from the Vatican.
Imhotep specialized in selling reproduction paintings and reproduction sculptures of the great Renaissance works of art to be found in the Vatican.
Imhotep enjoyed his current job.
It was quiet and kept him out of the spotlight.
For Imhotep had once had very challenging and important jobs that once kept him in the spotlight.
For Imhotep was roughly 3000 years old give or take a couple of centuries.
Officially he flourished back in the late 27th Century BC as THE Imhotep (“The One who comes in peace”). He was the Imhotep who served as Chancellor to the Egyptian Pharaoh Djoser and the Imhotep who was the High Priest of the sun god Ra at Heliopolis.
He was supposed to have died centuries ago.
In reality a fruit from the Tree of Immortality in the Garden of Eden had been brought to him by a mermaid.
He had eaten it and become immortal.
But he kept a low profile throughout the millenia only stepping into public limelight now and again.
With his knowledge of genetics, he had helped Sophia the Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom give birth while still being a virgin.
She gave birth to an eccentric creature called Yaldabaoth who went to Ireland and became a leprechaun.
Although she claimed that Yaldabaoth was the Demi-Urge who created the universe and was the same being as Yahweh the god of the Hebrews.
Most Gnostic groups accepted Sophia’s statement on the subject as authoritative.
Fortunately Yaldabaoth spent his time sleeping under rainbows alongside pots of gold after drinking too many pints of Guinness and too many bottles of Irish whiskey and so didn’t show up at any of Sophia’s red carpet parties in Hollywood alongside Tom Hanks and Dan Brown that were sponsored by the Kabbalah Centre in Los Angeles.
That way Yaldabaoth wasn’t around to rain on her parade.
That was left to a Hollywood producer whose perverted fetish was giving golden showers to people.
That producer was now facing jail time on charges of gross sexual misconduct.
After Sophia gave birth to Yaldabaoth, she gave up being a virgin when she fell in love with the Greek god Pan (a satyr) and had a torrid love affair with the half-man half-goat deity.
She gave birth to Baphomet (an androgynous half-male, half-female, half-goat, half-human demon hybrid) as a result of this liaison.
And Baphomet was one of the two demons worshipped and venerated by many members of the U.S. Democratic Party (the other demon being Baal).
So much for Imhotep’s association with Sophia.
Imhotep later served as a supernatural advisor to both Merlin and Morgan Le Fay during their supernatural battle for control of Camelot and Avalon.
He served as a physician to the Knights-Templar, the Knights-Hospitaller and the Teutonic Knights during the Crusades.
During the Renaissance, he served as an advisor to many alchemists and practitioners of Hermetic magic.
He also translated the works of Hermes Trismegistus from Egyptian and Greek into Latin, Italian, French and German.
He knew the German Renaissance alchemist, astrologer and magician Dr. Johann Georg Faustus who supposedly died in an alchemical experiment explosion at the Hotel zum Lowen in Staufen im Breisgau in 1541 when the demon Mephistopheles came to collect his soul.
In reality, Faust was only disfigured in the explosion and continued to live.
Although his face was now reconstructed out of various forms of grain, wheat, thistles and vegetation.
He finally died in 2011 when the then Set Enterprises Chief of Security and Intelligence Gathering Renfield R. Renfield hired an Irish arsonist to set fire to Faust’s farmfield of a face in order to do away with a scientific rival to Set Enterprises’ Chief Scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher.
Ironically enough, Imhotep had an affair with the vampiress Marguerite (who was Faust’s great love) in Germany back in the 1930s.
Marguerite had dropped Faust like a hot potato back in the 1540s after the alchemist had become disfigured.
Faust had gotten rid of his hot potato of a nose but Marguerite still did not take him back.
Instead she had an affair with the Vampiress Lilith who turned her into a vampiress.
In the 1930s, Marguerite had become an opera singer singing Wagnerian operas and Marguerite had become Der Fuhrer’s favourite opera singer.
Imhotep who served as a collector of relics for the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau during that decade had met Marguerite backstage at a production of Parsifal and it was lust at first sight.
They had a child as a result of that encounter- Dr. Faustus Imhotep who was currently the acting head of DARPA.
Being the son of an immortal Egyptian high priest and a vampiress, Dr. Faustus Imhotep looks far younger than his 85 years.
Donald Trump and most people in the U.S. government think Dr. Faustus Imhotep is only 40.
From the late 1950s to the early 1970s, THE Imhotep, “The One who comes in peace” and now calls himself Imhotep Pontifex Ra the Rome souvenir vendor, served as an advisor to Britain’s Hammer Films Studios giving them advice on both Dracula and Mummy films as Imhotep was an expert on both mummies and vampires.
Some of the women Imhotep met as an advisor on mummies, vampires and vampiresses to Hammer Films:
Ingrid Pitt
Jenny Hanley in Scars of Dracula 1970
Ingrid Pitt as Countess Dracula 1971
Valerie Leon In Blood From The Mummy’s Tomb 1971
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday March 8th
2019.
Between The Moon and Sixpence: A Poem
What lies between the moon and sixpence?
A pair of broken hearts?
A man who no longer loves his job selling in the City
A man who sacrifices all for art
His wife, children and comfortable home
Leaves London for the Bohemian haunts of Paris
But the biggest thing he left behind is his soul and his humanity
He is not kind, he is not cruel
He is indifferent
Which is the cruelest cruelty of all
But he is called a genius by a fellow artist
The same man whose wife he steals
And then abandons like yesterday’s canvas
Leaving behind a broken heart that takes its own life
How can he who paints such beauty be capable of such cruelty?
That is the eternal question
A man once thought that a watch left on the beach must have a creator
The same man applied it to the cosmos
This cosmos must have a creator
But for that watch on the beach
what was its maker like?
Was he cruel?
Was he kind?
We know not.
The same applies for the cosmos.
If a maker the cosmos has
Is he cruel? Is he kind?
Iago in Verdi’s Otello says he serves a cruel god
The explanation (that Shakespeare never offered)
As to why Iago told such lies about Desdemona to his friend Othello
That is the ultimate horror
If the cosmos a creator has
is ultimately a cruel being
Rather than face that horror
that’s why many atheism and agnosticism embrace
Though ironically in Transhumanism modern
The theory is posed,
We all live in a computer generated matrix
But then who created that matrix?
To substitute God for ultimate Virtual Reality designer
The question of kindness and cruelty remains unanswered
Lucifer was an artist
That ultimate rebel
For only an artist can seduce
The Satan of the Book of Job was the fallen Archangel Samael
An angelic lawyer who fell
like lawyers are prone to do
He takes away and scatters
But he cannot seduce
like Lucifer the Devil did to Eve
He promises beauty and godhood
But cannot deliver
for he is ultimately not the source of both
Between the moon and sixpence
our artist anti-hero decides Paris is not
and goes to Tahiti
that South Pacific paradise
And will he finally find Paradise there?
There he finds Ata a South Seas woman
and there he says words he’d never thought he’d speak, “Love”
And there the man paints Eden
on the walls of his hut
Towards the end of his life he becomes kind
Not cruel
Not indifferent
For genius on its own can never find Paradise
It needs to hold the hand of Love
Angst ridden artists, poets and musicians history has seen many
Some have seduced and left broken hearts by the thousands
Others were kind and compassionate
The ability to create is a form of beauty
It is alluring
And with its allure
comes the ability to seduce
Creating beauty is only true when mixed with love and kindness
And leaves the perturbing question
Was the Creator of the Cosmos one with love?
To create a cosmos so vast and all encompassing
We mortal beings cannot comprehend such a Creator
Surely a giant?
Or maybe a phony hiding behind a curtain like that wizard of Oz?
The instances of love we can comprehend
Such as a child in its mother’s arms
The smile of the child towards mother
And the smile of the mother towards child
And that is why Oscar Wilde
whose Dorian Gray showed so shockingly how art and beauty could be used for evil
embraced as Creator the Babe who was born in Bethlehem
In whose humanity and divinity, Love and Intellect are one.
-A poem written by Christopher
Saturday March 2nd
2019
inspired by watching
the 1942 movie
The Moon and Sixpence
