The Night One Eagle Split Into Two

January 5, 2021 at 10:57 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )


The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith with an eagle on her shoulder

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith stood not far from the Lincoln Memorial in Washington DC.

Elon Musk’s artificial moon was shining down on top of her.

It was supposed to be shining down on top of Edgar Allan Poe’s grave in Baltimore Maryland but the GPS computer network guiding Musk’s artificial moon had been hacked by a hermit gnome (frozen lawn ornament) living in Nome, Alaska.

As such the Muskian artificial moon was now hovering over the Lincoln Memorial in Washington DC.

On a car radio, a very old song was being played,

“We’re the John Birch Society, we’re out to save our country from the Communistic threat.
And if your mommy (pronounced mom-mee) is a Commie,
Well you’ve got to turn her in…”

A group of lawn ornament garden gnomes in Washington DC eyed with suspicion a mask wearing Nancy Pelosi as she walked by.

In the moonlight of Elon Musk’s artificial moon, with a tattoo of an eagle on her left shoulder and a living eagle perched atop her right shoulder, Lilith’s hair along with her headband, beads and headdress (that had once belonged to Chief Sitting Bull) glistened silvery in the moonlight.

Sitting Bull’s revenge on the U.S. government for the massacre of his people that had occurred at the Pine Ridge Reservation in South Dakota in December 1890 was about to unfold.

Down in Tartarus in the Underworld, one General George Armstrong Custer had just escaped from his rotating barbeque spit over an open fire in the place and was hoping to pass Cerberus and his watchful eye (one on each of the three heads) and swim across the River Styx and back to the land of the living.

But at that moment, Custer received a ghostly arrow through his ghostly knee.

Custer now had a wounded knee.

“Fly,” Lilith spoke to the eagle.

The eagle flew off her shoulder and over the Lincoln Memorial.

The eagle was suddenly set upon by a flying red dragon, a flying bear, a flying lion, a flying cat and a winged horse named Chollima.

The eagle was ripped in two.

Facing one another across the Potomac River were two opposing supernatural forces.

On one side of the Potomac River were the ghosts of Abraham Lincoln, General Ulysses S. Grant and General Robert E. Lee (now all allies).

On the other side of the Potomac River were the ghosts of Vladimir Lenin, Josef Stalin, Mao Tse-tung and the vampire Lev Tomi (who in his mortal life had been Leon Trotsky). They too were now all allies.

Walking on the water of the Potomac River was the Greek god Zeus who cried in a loud voice, “Release the Kraken!”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday January 5th
2020.

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Mephistopheles Leaves Joe Biden’s Body Temporarily For Secret Meeting With Kamala Harris

December 29, 2020 at 11:58 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

“Those who are adherents, followers and disciples of the united Deutero-Nazi Fourth Reich/USSR 2.0 New World Order One World Government (aka the Great Reset) now being imposed upon the world are easy to spot. They’re the ones wearing masks.”
-British MP Renfield R. Renfield

Renfield was finishing up his podcast by mentioning a news story about a disabled U.S. war vet who was beat up by people wearing masks in a shopping mall because he refused to wear a mask saying he “wasn’t disabled fighting for freedom in order to return home and be told that he didn’t have the freedom to breathe freely.”
After being beaten, he was then thrown to the ground and arrested by Deutero-Nazi stormtrooper mall security guards.

“What is the difference between these mask wearing thugs and stormtroopers and the terrorists of Leon Trotsky’s Bolshevik Red Army and Adolf Hitler’s Brown Shirts, SS and Gestapo?” Renfield asked and then answered, “Absolutely nothing.”

Renfield then noted that over 30 odd years of Star Wars films had wholeheartedly failed to clue in “the stupidest generation ever.”

“What was the first thing Anakim Skywalker/Darth Vader and the Empire Stormtroopers did upon going over to the Dark Side?” Renfield noted, “Put on masks of course.”

. . .

Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was paying an unauthorized tourist visit to the CERN Large Hadron Collidor tunnel in Switzerland.

What he saw outside the tunnel shook him to the core.

He dropped the William Tell arrowed apple that he was eating and took a second look.

He immediately got on the phone to Peter Whitstable the man they called the Fox Mulder of Interpol.

“Pete,” the wee leprechaun gasped, “There’s something unbelievable happening outside the CERN tunnel?”.

“What’s that?” Whitstable was examining a large fortune slip of paper that he had pulled out of a Great Pumpkin sized fortune cookie that purported to give details of the private sex life of Xi Jinping (the fictitious fortune had been in fact ghost written by the ghost of the Byzantine historian Procopius).

“The god Shiva is dancing outside the tunnel,” Yald (as the leprechaun was called for short) explained.

“Yald,” Whitstable ate an egg roll with a pair of chopsticks, “That’s not the actual god. That’s a statue of Shiva as Lord of The Dance.”

“There’s a statue here, sure,” Yald noted, “But there really is the actual god himself. Shiva. He’s dancing a Bavarian polka with the Irish Celtic goddess Morrigan while the Norse god Thor is playing the accordion and the Greek god Ares is playing the tuba.”

“Really?” Whitstable ate the Peking Hot and Sour Baked Alaska, “Can you take a photo and email that to me? I’d like to share that on my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram pages.”

. . .

The fallen angel Mephistopheles (who demonically possessed Joe Biden’s body so that the senile old fool could make an intelligent sounding statement on occasion) had temporarily left the senile old fool’s body for a secret meeting with Kamala Harris.

They were meeting to discuss what should be done with Joe shortly after he was inaugurated.

Should Oprah and Dr. Phil hold a joint press conference on the front lawn of the White House and declare Joe clinically insane as he’s seen in the background being carried away in a straight jacket by secret service agents dressed as members of the Emperor Caligula’s Praetorian Guard?

Or should Joe meet with an accident aboard Air Force One as the door is “accidentally” left open at 5,000 feet in the air and Joe “accidentally” steps through it?

After briefly serving as President, Kamala would crown herself Queen of the Land.

A Communist Queen of course somewhat like the Kim Communist dynastic heriditary monarchy of North Korea except Kamala could reign for over 100 years as a Communist transhuman.

She would adopt the title the White Queen to appease (closeted White Supremacist) eugenicist Bill Gates.

As for her name as Queen, she’d take a name to honour her predecessor Joe Biden and herself Kamala Harris.

She’d take the letters J and d from Joe Biden’s name and the letters “a” and “is” from her own name Kamala Harris to form the name Jadis which would be the name of the White Queen who’d rule for at least 100 years.

In a world where, as C.S. Lewis observed, “It would be always winter and never Christmas”.

The way had been prepared for it by Bill Gates, Dr. Anthony Fauci, Pope Francis and various political leaders all over the globe cancelling Christmas for 2020.

As Joe Biden himself had said, “It will be a long dark winter ahead.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday December 29th
2020.

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The Christmas Star Jupiter-Saturn Great Conjunction

December 21, 2020 at 11:58 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, Science, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

The Jupiter-Saturn Great Conjunction or the Christmas Star was visible in the night sky in the northern hemisphere for the first time since just before dawn on March 4th 1226.

But in the city of the Walrus Cow Demon, it could not be seen.

For snow and ice fog were falling on the city.

The Norse god Loki and the Norse wolf Fenrir and the Jotunn (frost giants) were walking the streets of the City of the Walrus Cow Demon preventing the Christmas Star from being seen.

On this day the demon Mephistopheles possessed Joe Biden received his vaccine for the Wuhan CCP virus (called Covid-19 by WHO) that would alter his DNA.

And the Vatican City State announced that all its employees and residents would have to receive the DNA altering vaccine (even though it was made with stem cells from babies sacrificed to the demon god Moloch).

Beelzebub who was the unofficial head of the Vatican Congregation For The Doctrine of The Faith under Francis had written the document approving use of the vaccine.

As Biden was getting his DNA altering vaccine, Mephistopheles had left Biden’s body temporarily to attend a special signing ceremony at the Vatican Secretariat of State.

Mephistopheles had managed to negotiate a new Nazi-Soviet Pact to replace the one broken in June 1941 when Hitler’s Nazi Third Reich had attacked Stalin’s Soviet Union

The new Nazi-Soviet Pact was being signed by the ghost of Josef Stalin (who had been dispensationally released from Tartarus at the request of Pope Francis) and a Russian grey wolf who was possessed by the ghost of Adolf Hitler (Hitler had been released from Tartarus at the request of the Norse god Odin a few years back).

The Winter Solstice 2020 Nazi-Soviet Pact would serve as the basis of the Great Reset One World Government being advocated by the World Economic Forum and the United Nations’ 2030 Sustainable Development Agenda.

Meanwhile in the Yukon in far northern Canada near the town of Dawson City, the Klondike vampiress Klondike Kate was heading out to see if she could catch a glimpse of the Jupiter-Saturn Great Conjunction also known as the Christmas Star.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday December 21st
2020

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Alberta Premier Jason Kenney Is A Fat Slob Neo-Fascist Apostle of The Antichrist

December 8, 2020 at 11:59 pm (Aesthetics, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, Mystery, News, Poetry, Sorcery, Television, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was reading a recent Facebook status posted by a friend of his a geopolitical analyst who lived in Calgary.

The Facebook status read:

“The Alberta Provincial Government of Premier Jason Kenney have shown themselves to be Apostles of The Antichrist by announcing Neo-Bolshevik Covid Communist restrictions on the province.

They have further established themselves as Apostles of The Antichrist by calling this stupid press conference at 4 PM local time thus pre-empting my favourite soap opera The Young and The Restless which starts in this time slot.

At least fat slob Neo-Fascist Apostle of The Antichrist Jason Kenney could have waited until 5 PM (to pre-empt the Channel 7 Global News Calgary Disinformation Branch of the Orwellian Covid-1984 New World Order Ministry of Propaganda local news) to make his bloody announcement.

Fat slob Neo-Fascist Apostle of the Antichrist Jason Kenney shall roast in the flames of Hell for all Eternity for this.”

After reading this, Renfield was reminded of a historical incident often mentioned by the geopolitical analyst’s best friend in University a History major who went on to become a professional researcher and archivist.

According to the researcher-archivist, when the Lester B. Pearson Canadian Federal Liberal government brought in the Canada Federal Medical Care Act in 1966 which would establish a federal Public Health Care system, Alberta’s Provincial Social Credit Premier Ernest C. Manning was opposed to it because Alberta already had its own provincial Health Care system MSI (which stood for Medical Services Inc.).

Manning figured that the proposed new Canadian Medicare would not be as good as the provincial MSI.

In this, Manning was probably correct as the Lester Bowles Pearson Federal Liberals had already shown bad judgement by getting the Quebec Communist Pierre Elliot Trudeau to run for Federal Liberal MP in a Montreal riding and then naming him to the Federal Cabinet when the bum was actually elected.

Manning showed bad judgement however when he publicly broadcast on TV his opposition to the Canada Medicare Act by pre-empting an episode of the popular TV show The Munsters which was shown on the CTV Network’s broadcast outlet stations in Alberta.

The Munsters was an extremely popular television show back in the 1960s relating the misadventures and mishaps of the much beloved central character Herman Munster (played by actor Fred Gwynne).

Manning’s inherent bungling and bad judgement in pre-empting an episode of The Munsters would cost Manning’s Provincial Social Credit Party dearly in the next Alberta Provincial election in 1967.

Social Credit had always enjoyed a large majority in the Alberta Provincial Legislative Assembly ever since it first won election in 1935.

Opposition parties usually only held about 4 or 5 seats at the most.

However thanks to Manning’s bungling and incompetence in the Munstergate Affair, Social Credit went from holding 65 seats in the Alberta Legislature to holding only 55 seats in the 1967 Alberta Provincial election.

Social Credit now faced a massive 10 man Opposition, 6 seats went to the Alberta Progressive Conservative Party under its new leader Edgar Peter Lougheed, 3 seats went to the Alberta Liberal Party and 1 seat was won by an Independent.

Renfield figured that with pre-empting The Young and The Restless episode at 4 PM instead of the Channel 7 Global News Calgary Marxist Bullshit Propaganda Masquerading As News program at 5 PM, fat slob Neo-Fascist Apostle of the Antichrist Jason Kenney had sealed his electoral doom in the next Alberta Provincial election.

. . .

Genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee (whose serial killing specialty was killing ugly looking women) was walking to a nearby grocery store to buy eggs to make himself an omelette.

Suddenly he heard hurried footsteps.

The footsteps were coming from across the street as a thin ugly looking stoat (Pan Goatee divided ugly looking women into 3 categories- thin ugly stoats, medium sized ugly gargoyles and fat ugly blimps) was rushing to see if she could get ahead of him.

She rushed on the other side of parked cars on the street to get on to the sidewalk.

Goatee raced ahead as he wasn’t about to let someone as repulsively ugly as she was get ahead of him.

The ugly looking creature swore at Goatee under her breath (which was as foul as the sulphurous fumes of Hell) that Goatee with his excellent hearing picked up.

“Mumbling swear words is a sign of insanity,” Goatee commented with the eloquence of a Laurence Olivier delivering a Shakespearian theatrical performance as he beheaded the repulsively ugly looking thing with his astral laser machete.

He then cut the ugly looking creature up into 999 trillion pieces.

Nanites came and ate the pieces of the late unlamented uglo and then barfed all over one another.

The half-demon/half-goat hybrid Krampus then gathered up the uglo regurgitating nanites and put them in his sack and took them down to Hell.

. . .

Meanwhile on the Thames River in London, demons loyal to Apophis the Egyptian serpent god of Chaos were on board a ghostly spectral double of the Russian gunship Aurora (whose shots fired on the Winter Palace in Saint Petersburg signalled the start of the 1917 Russian Bolshevik Revolution).

The Russian gunship Aurora 2.0 had its great searchlights beamed on to Buckingham Palace.

The ghost of American singer Johnny Cash (recently granted a dispensational release from the Underworld by Hades and Persephone) protested the Aurora 2.0 having Buckingham Palace within its sites.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday December 8th
2020.

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Buckley’s Ghost

November 24, 2020 at 11:50 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Today would have been William F. Buckley Jr.’s 95th birthday if he had still been alive (Buckley having been born on November 24th 1925).

As such he had been given a couple of days of dispensational release from the Underworld by Hades.

Today he was once again joining famed British interviewer David Frost for an interview.

“Now yesterday,” Frost noted, “You were talking about how Pope Francis was meeting with ‘woke’ NBA athletes and officials at the Vatican. Anything to add to that?”.

“Yes,” Buckley held two ghostly fingers against his ghostly chin in a thoughtful pose, “I noticed neither the Pope nor those he was meeting with were practicing social distancing nor wearing masks which I understand is all the current rage among global Marxist elitists these days. Although they seemed to spend more time urging the plebs to do it rather than practicing it themselves. As can be seen from this photo of Francis and the ‘woke’ NBA athletes and officials.”

“Didn’t Francis in his new book Let Us Dream in which he outlines his dystopian Marxist totalitarian nightmare vision for the future,” Frost pointed out, “Didn’t he lambast people for protesting the wearing of masks even though he rarely wears masks himself?”.

“He did,” Buckley’s ghost nodded and smiled, “Hypocrite, thy name is Francis.”

“Didn’t he also get after people for not protesting the lack of clean drinking water in various villages across the planet?” Frost inquired.

“He did,” Buckley put his ghostly arms behind his ghostly head and leaned back to answer the question, “Only a Communist would be stupid enough to think that protesting the lack of clean drinking water in various villages will help alleviate the problem. The pragmatist’s approach to resolving this issue would be to actually build clean drinking water pumps and facilities in those villages.”

“I understand there was another meeting held at the Vatican yesterday besides Francis meeting the ‘woke’ NBA players and officials?” Frost chewed on the ghostly eraser at the end of his ghostly pencil.

“There was,” Buckley’s ghost nodded, “There was a meeting between the PRC (People’s Republic of China) Ministry of Agriculture and the Vatican Secretariat of State to discuss the topic of Agriculture and Starvation.”

“Agriculture and starvation?” Frost’s ghost raised a ghostly eyebrow.

“Yes,” Buckley stretched his arms, “The subjects of agriculture and starvation are two subjects that seem to be dear to the Communist mind. In Stalinist Soviet Ukraine of 1932-33, the Communists showed their lack of expertise in agriculture (leaving that to the kulaks) but showed themselves masters of starvation (stealing food from the kulaks at the point of bayonet and gun). In Maoist China in the 1950s, they again showed their lack of expertise in agriculture (leaving that to the rural peasants) but showed themselves masters of starvation (stealing food from the rural peasants at the point of bayonet and gun). And the whole thing seems to have been repeated ad nauseum in various Communist states across the world.”

“So it’s actually a scary thing that the Communist Vatican and the Communist regime in Beijing,” Frost’s ghost bit off the ghostly eraser from the ghostly pencil with his ghostly teeth, “are meeting to discuss agriculture and starvation just as the world stands on the brink of a global Great Reset Marxist-Leninist New World Order?”.

“Indeed food plants and distribution businesses being shut down as a result of technocratic “health experts” with massive messianic complexes and power filled ego trips in this time of Covid,” Buckley’s ghost leaned forward in his ghostly chair, “shall lead to massive starvation in many countries next year but that’s something all those yacking about the Great Reset are not talking about.”

Meanwhile as AP Associated Press declared “President-elect” Joe Biden announced his gay and merry band of Communists who would serve in his cabinet, the ghosts of Abraham Lincoln, Ulysses S. Grant and Robert E. Lee (now all allies in the wake of the Neo-Bolshevik Communist threat to America) sailed in a ghostly battleship up the Potomac River.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday November 24th
2020.

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The Nymph Who Played The Violin

October 24, 2020 at 10:43 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) ()

The nymph who played the violin

It was the Saturday before Halloween 2020
The month of witches and werewolves and Oak Island gold
An otherworldly month in a surreal year
A year which saw a virus become a god
To which all must pay homage

Simeon told the Virgin Mary
That her son the Christ
Would be responsible
for the fall and rise of many in Israel

Some two thousand and twenty years after that
A virus offspring of bats or Pangolin anteaters
With a little bit of help and tweaking
from Wuhan lab virologists
operating within the demonic agenda of
Xi Jinping
is being set up for the
fall and rise of many in the world

Will the virus bring down a man
with the narcissism of a 1st Century Roman Emperor
And bring to power a senile old fool
Who’s the father of a pedophile and a crackhead
Who serves as the puppet of Neo-Bolsheviks
Anxious to incorporate a 1917 Russian Revolution
On the American political scene
With the cheering and applause
of an Argentinian Trotsky wannabe
in the Vatican
who underwent an extremely probing
far beyond frontal lobotomy
very early in life
and has never recovered since?

Sleepy Hollow
the scene of that haunting encounter
between teacher Ichabod Crane
and a Headless Horseman
far from the scene
of a grisly encounter
between a French schoolteacher
and a beheading disciple
of a 7th Century pedophile pervert Prophet

Sleepy Hollow
where the Headless Horseman
Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden
has returned
accompanied by his talking, singing and dancing
zombie black horse
Bucephalus Reborn

Sleepy Hollow
where an Irish leprechaun
son of a Gnostic goddess
is being seduced by
Tiffany Twisted
the Mercedes Benz
loving witch
at the Hotel California

The innkeeper of the Rip Van Winkle Inn
Former proprietor of the Hotel California
But can’t remember Tiffany
even though she’s a registered guest at the Inn

The leprechaun’s pet pterodactyl
has been asked to judge a pumpkin carving contest
Where New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo
has inserted registered Republican
cast ballots
For early voting in the state

Sleepy Hollow
where a brainless Antifa/BLM white liberal “yute”
Was eaten by rats down by the riverside
after being chased by a group of black cats

Sleepy Hollow
where a West Coast private eye
was holidaying
far from the madness
of the state California
whose insanity
was worse than that
of the Hotel California

Sleepy Hollow
where this evening
the private eye
heard the gentle melodious playing
of a violin
and walked into the woods
to see its origin

And there on a beautifully carved piece of ice
sat a beautiful nymph holding a violin
dressed in a beautiful white dress
and creamish gray ballet slippers
surrounded by pink flower petals
that decorated the autumn floor
of the forest

Embrace of nymph and private eye
Arm on arm
Chest on chest
Lips on lips
A moment of caresses
In a world
where a divinized virus’ priesthood
says “Maintain social distancing”
A moment of love
in a world of hate
A moment of humanity
in a world of monsters
A moment of truth
in a world of lies
A moment far away
from the maddening world
A moment where what beautiful music
they made together.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday October 24th
2020

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Dinner At Tiffany’s: Leprechaun of The Dance

October 16, 2020 at 10:59 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Gothic, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Tiffany Twisted: Formerly the sensuous witch of the Hotel California
and now the sensuous witch of Sleepy Hollow

Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun had been invited to dinner in the Inn room across the hall from his own.

The room that had been rented to one Tiffany Twisted.

Yaldabaoth bathed, showered and shaved.

Then he put on his Irish Spring Mist of The River Shannon aftershave cologne followed by his best green tuxedo and little green bow tie.

Then he walked out the door.

Bucephalus Reborn the walking, talking and dancing zombie black horse thought to himself, “I wonder if I should have told him he forgot to put his trousers on.”

A thought with which Joe Biden campaign staffers were quite familiar with when it came to their own candidate.

Yaldabaoth knocked on the door.

“Come in, Yaldabaoth,” the sensuous voice of Tiffany Twisted beckoned.

Yaldabaoth opened the door and saw this vision:

“Wow, do you ever look hot,” Yaldabaoth felt like President Teddy Roosevelt at this very moment.

“I see you came prepared,” Tiffany smiled like the siren laced rocks of the eastern Mediterranean.

Yaldabaoth looked down and his face turned red, “Faith and begorrah, I seem to have forgotten my trousers.”

He grabbed a copy of James Joyce’s Ulysses off the room’s bookshelf and held it in front of his shamrock deco decorated underwear.

“It’s all right, Yaldabaoth,” she smiled like dawn rising over the hill of Tara, “I like a leprechaun who knows what he wants.”

Tiffany dimmed the lights and started lighting candles.

In the background could be heard Cher’s voice singing on an old 45,

Dark lady laughed and danced and lit the candles one by one
Danced to her gypsy music till her brew was done
Dark lady played back magic till the clock struck on the twelve
She told me more about me than I knew myself.

When the candles were lit, Tiffany and Yaldabaoth drank red wine and ate a Guinness laced Irish potato casserole.

For dessert, they had pumpkin pie with whipped cream on top.

“I hope this pie wasn’t made with my friend Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden’s head,” Yaldabaoth commented as he licked the whipped cream off Tiffany’s toes.

His newly formed acquaintance Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden was the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow and had a pumpkin jack o’ lantern for a head.

“It wasn’t,” Tiffany assurred him with tender kisses.

The clock was approaching 12.

“Let’s dance,” Tiffany put on her record player again.

Tiffany reached for Yaldabaoth’s lucky shamrock.

The voice on the record sang,

I was working in the lab late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
For my monster from his slab began to rise
And suddenly to my surprise

He did the mash, he did the monster mash
The monster mash, it was a graveyard smash
He did the mash, it caught on in a flash
He did the mash, he did the monster mash

At that moment the Headless Horseman walked in unaware that he was entering the wrong room.

When he saw what the leprechaun and the sensuous witch were doing, he screamed, “I’m blind. I’m blind.”

He turned out into the hall, ran down the stairs, tripped over his feet, landed on the floor and his pumpkin head came off and rolled towards the grandfather clock that was just starting to strike 12.

“Mercy,” the innkeeper muttered at the front desk, “This never happened at the Hotel California.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday October 16th
2020.

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Yaldabaoth Meets Tiffany Twisted

October 15, 2020 at 10:59 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was having breakfast along with his pet pterodactyl Hovering Voyeurius Over Raquelis Welchius, Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow and his singing, talking and dancing zombie black horse Bucephalus Reborn in the small dining room of The Rip Van Winkle Inn.

Sitting across from them was a brain dead zombie “woke” and “culture cancelling” white liberal “yute” (which is the lawyer Cousin Vinnyish dialect pronounciation of the word “youth”).

The “woke” brain dead zombie “yute” was on holidays.

He had spent most of the summer rioting, looting, burning and vandalizing in the city of Portland Oregon in what Michelle Obama and the mainstream Marxist media call “peaceful protests”.

Now he decided to come to Sleepy Hollow in New York because he had always wanted to spend Halloween in Sleepy Hollow.

He wore a BLACK LIVES MATTER t-shirt.

Although that message obviously didn’t apply to cats since he had run over a black cat on the highway to get here.

The “woke” brain dead zombie “yute” was busy yacking away to his airheaded girlfriend (who had picked him up from the court house in Portland after the elected liberal Democrat Marxist inclined county prosecuter had dropped criminal charges against him for the umpteenth time these past few months).

“What books do you like to read?” He asked her.

“Well, I’m trying to start reading Harry Potter,” The airhead replied.

“Harry Potter?” The brain-dead zombie “woke” “yute” dropped his fork, “Don’t you know that J.K. Rowling is a bigot and a promoter of hatred for saying that a transgendered man shouldn’t be treated the same as a biologically born female?”.

“Excuse me, young fellow,” Yaldabaoth doffed his little green leprechaun hat to the “woke” “yute” and spoke politely in a soft Irish lilt, “But I happen to think you’re a stupid brainless asshole.”

“What?” The “woke” “yute” blinked, “You just called me a stupid brainless asshole.”

“That’s right,” Yaldabaoth grinned and nodded and then turned serious, “In my own home country of Ireland, there’s a case going on at the moment involving a trans who calls himself/herself/itself Barbie Kardashian. He was born Alejandro Gabriel Gentile but decided some years back that he was actually a woman in a man’s body. He’s currently 18 years old but already has a long history of violent and sexual assaults against women. Specifically against his female care home and social workers including a brutal 2018 attack on a woman whose eyes he tried to gouge out. Now he’s once again in jail on sexual assault charges. But the Limerick District Court operating under the European Union’s politically correct Human Rights Code is ordering him held at the Limerick County Women’s Prison since he self identifies as a woman. So you’ve now got a man with a long history of violence and sexual assault against women being locked up in a female only space. And all because the courts are following the suffocating totalitarian atmosophere of political correctness advocated by brain dead zombie “woke” “yute” SJWs (social justice warriors) assholes such as yourself instead of the common sense and logic advocated by great thinkers and great writers such as J.K. Rowling.”

Having been called a brain dead zombie “woke” “yute” asshole, the “woke” “yute”” asshole then crawled on to the floor into the fetal position which is exactly what an Antifa/BLM white liberal “yute” leader did when he found himself being arrested for the first time in Kenosha Wisconsin for “peacefuly rioting” as he had never been arrested in other American cities before for “peaceful rioting”.

The innkeeper whispered to Yaldabaoth, “Tiffany Twisted the woman who’s renting the room across from you would like to meet you.”

Yaldabaoth went upstairs and knocked on the door.

“Come in,” Tiffany said in a soft sensual voice.

Yaldabaoth opened the door and came face to face with Tiffany Twisted.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday October 15th
2020.

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San Diego Bishop Has Demons and Communist Ghosts On His Front Lawn

October 14, 2020 at 10:45 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Robert McElroy the brainless Catholic bishop of San Diego California was standing on his front lawn and shooting the breeze with the demons Baal and Baphomet as well as the ghosts of Lenin, Stalin and Mao Tse-tung.

Which was probably a dangerous thing to be doing.

Recently Mark J. Seitz the brainless Catholic bishop of El Paso Texas had likewise been standing on his front lawn and shooting the breeze with the demons Baal and Baphomet as well as the ghosts of Lenin, Stalin and Mao Tse-tung.

Days later he came down with the Covid-19 virus.

Comparing recipes for a 1000-year-old laid egg (also known as the U.S. Democratic Party Platform) with the late Chairman Mao was no guarantee this would make one immune to the CCP Wuhan virus.

Already Bishop McElroy could be seen coughing and sputtering and standing behind him was Thanatos Thanatotheristes Reaper of Death who was the patron demon of Covid-19.

Thanatos Thanatotheristes had the body of a giant mammalian bat but the head of a Thanatotheristes (which was a type of T-Rex).

Later the demon Baphomet had an interview with CNN’s Anderson Cooper (an interview that CNN producers decided not to show on television).

Cooper informed Baphomet, “I understand your half-brother is currently visiting America.”

“What?” Baphomet spit out his vegan soup, “What’s he doing here?”.

Meanwhile in the town of Sleepy Hollow New York, Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was taking a walk with the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow to look at the autumn colours.

“I think I’d like to stay in Sleepy Hollow until Halloween,” Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman remarked through his Great Pumpkin jack o’ lantern head, “Things can get pretty exciting in Sleepy Hollow on Halloween.”

“Well seeing as how you and I and your horse Bucephalus Reborn and my pterodactyl Hovering Voyeurius Over Raquelis Welchius are the only guests who seem to be staying in Sleepy Hollow’s Rip Van Winkle Inn at the moment, I’m sure we can keep our rooms over until Halloween.”

“You’re right,” the Headless Horseman grinned 🎃, “Let’s go tell the innkeeper.”

Back at the inn, the innkeeper (who at one time in his life had been the proprieter of the Hotel California) was examining the Mercedes Benz car that had just pulled up driven by a lovely and beautiful witch.

“What did you say your name was again?” The innkeeper inquired.

“Tiffany Twisted,” the drop dead gorgeous witch smiled.

“Haven’t we met before?” The innkeeper blinked.

She smiled her white ivories at him, “Some dance to remember. Some dance to forget.”

She took the keys to her room which would be across from Yaldabaoth’s.

She walked up the inn stairs in her short black skirt and sexy black silk nylons.

Then she turned around and smiled at the innkeeper, “You obviously danced to forget.”

She continued up the stairs while the innkeeper scratched his head and continued to wonder where he had seen her before.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday October 14th
2020.

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It’s The Great Pumpkin, Headless Horseman!

October 11, 2020 at 10:59 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Humour, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

The talking and singing black zombie horse Bucephalus Reborn, Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow, Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun and his pet pterodactyl Hovering Voyeurius Over Raquelis Welchius were in Sleepy Hollow having hoped to meet the Great Pumpkin this past Friday night.

Sadly the Great Pumpkin was held up at the U.S. border by ICE officials.

He was put into a cage and had to undergo a test for Covid-19.

Dr. Anthony Fauci was brought in to conduct the test himself.

Dr. Fauci determined that the Great Pumpkin was indeed positive for Covid-19.

However due to the large amount of crying and wailing children outside the ICE compound on the Ontario-New York Canada-U.S.border, 100 doctors from the Center For Disease Control in Atlanta, Georgia were brought in to test the Great Pumpkin.

All 100 doctors determined that the Great Pumpkin was negative for Covid-19.

ICE decided to release the Great Pumpkin on this night October 11th.

The Great Pumpkin then headed south to the village of Sleepy Hollow.

Last evening October 10th as they were in their room in the Rip Van Winkle Inn, the 4 visitors to Sleepy Hollow mentioned in the first paragraph watched on their room’s TV set an interview between the ghost of TV talk show host Merv Griffin and the ghost of noted writer, director and actor Orson Welles which was being shown on the Paranormal Channel.

Yesterday October 10th 2020 was the 35th anniversary of the death of Orson Welles (Welles having died on October 10th 1985).

Welles’ ghost was currently serving as an advisor to British MP Renfield R. Renfield along with the ghost of Winston Churchill.

When the interview was over, Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun turned the TV off and phoned downstairs to the front desk asking for a specific brand of rum.

The innkeeper replied, “We haven’t had that spirit here since 1999.”

An artist called Prince who was formerly the artist formerly known as Prince had apparently drank the last bottle at 10 minutes to midnight on the New Year’s Eve just before the advent of the year 2000.

Meanwhile on the radio a well-known female porn star was singing that old Bryan Adams hit Summer of ’69.

Buchephalus Reborn had grabbed an old geographical atlas off the room’s bookshelf and lay on the floor trying to locate the Hotel California on a map.

Outside the window could be seen a horde of eagles circling the inn.

Such was last night the evening of October 10th 2020.

Tonight October 11th 2020 the four were walking towards the Sleepy Hollow pumpkin patch where the Great Pumpkin was putting in an appearance (hopefully).

They walked past the cemetery where schoolteacher Ichabod Crane was buried.

As they walked past the cemetery, the horse Bucephalus Reborn started whistling the tune to an old Irish folk song Whistling Gypsy.

Yaldabaoth began to sing,

The whistling gypsy came over the hill
Down to the valley so shady;
He whistled and he sang
Till the green woods rang
And he won the heart of a lady.


The woman whose heart Yaldabaoth won and would be waiting for him on his bed in the room when they got back to the inn.

They soon arrived at the pumpkin patch.

As spooky music played on an abandoned church organ not far from the pumpkin patch, the Great Pumpkin rose above all the other pumpkins and said,

I am the Great Pumpkin
Doomed for a certain term to walk the night
and for the day confined to fast in fires
Till all the weight gained by eating me
Is burnt and purged away.

With that Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow grabbed the Great Pumpkin.

And Buchephalus Reborn grabbed a tube of Crazy Glue.

When his hooves removed the top off the tube of Crazy Glue, the horse asked, “Why do I feel the spirits of my relatives around me?”.

The horse then glued the Great Pumpkin to the top of the Headless Horseman’s body between his shoulders.

“Woe is me!” Were the Great Pumpkin’s last words before succumbing to the consciousness of Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow.

U.S. Postal Service employee Norman Newman who had been wandering around Sleepy Hollow hopelessly lost the past couple of days came over when he heard the cry “Woe is me!”.

He handed the Headless Horseman a lettered envelope addressed to JOHNNY WO, SLEEPY HOLLOW.

The letter was postmarked UNCLE ERNIE’S PLACE, SOMEWHERE DOWN UNDER, AUSTRALIA.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday October 11th
2020.

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