Thessalonike of Macedon Meets Dracul and Yaldabaoth
Thessalonike of Macedon
Prof. William Charles an Associate Professor of Mythology, Folklore, Vampirism, Lycanthropy and Paranormal Studies at Oxford University was delivering a lecture in front of a fountain with a statue of a mermaid inside the fountain.
Prof. William Charles was delivering the lecture to a camera as part of an on-line course that he was teaching.
Said Prof. Charles, “Now there is a popular Greek legend that says Alexander the Great’s half-sister Thessalonike of Macedon became a mermaid and lived and frolicked in the Aegean Sea for hundreds of years.
The legend states that Alexander the Great in his quest for the Fountain of Immortality managed to get a flask of this immortal water.
He happened to wash Thessalonike’s hair with this flask of immortal water.
For Alexander had foolishly forgot to bring along the bottle of shampoo that his half-sister Thessalonike had asked for.
Not wanting Thessalonike to throw a major spaz attack as a result of his blundering, Alexander used the flask of immortality water to wash his half-sister’s hair instead.
When Alexander the Great died in the Persian capital of Babylon in June 323 BC, the legend says that his grief-stricken sister attempted to end her life by jumping into the sea.
Instead of drowning, however, she became a mermaid passing judgment on mariners throughout the centuries and across the Seven Seas.
To the sailors she encountered, she would always pose the same question, “Is Alexander the King alive?”.
To which the correct answer would be, “He lives and reigns and conquers the world.”
Given this answer, she would allow the ship and her crew to sail safely away in calm seas.
Any other answer would transform her into a raging Gorgon bent on sending the ship and every sailor on board to the bottom of the sea.”
. . .
“So that was how the German battleship Bismarck was actually sunk to the bottom of the sea?” British Prime Minister Boris Johnson was reading the top secret report on the sinking of the Bismarck that was finally being released over 80 years after the incident had happened back in May of 1941.
“It looks like Johnny Horton’s ghost will have to rewrite the lyrics of his hit song Sink The Bismarck,” An eavesdropping British MP Renfield R. Renfield (who had wiretapped Boris Johnson’s office) quipped.
“Who would have thought that it was a mermaid?” Amadeus Emanon ate a plate of sweet and sour jumbo shrimp, “And Alexander the Great’s half-sister at that.”
. . .
Meanwhile as animals at the Denver Zoo in Colorado were now being injected with Covid vaccines as part of the Biden Administration’s MAKE AMERICA WOKE AGAIN efforts, a demon possessed marine biologist had injected the mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon with a Covid-19 vaccine in the Aegean Sea.
The end result of the injection was that it had turned Thessalonike of Macedon into a mortal woman again.
And it was in that form that Thessalonike of Macedon had appeared to Dracul Van Helsing and Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun on a pier on the Aegean Sea.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday July 8th
2021.
Linda Cannon
Linda Cannon: A provocative agent provocateur
Throughout much of 1958, Soviet Communist Party General-Secretary Nikita Khrushchev was worried about the Avro Arrow (Avro Canada CF 105-Arrow) a delta-winged interceptor aircraft designed and built by Avro Canada (A.V. Roe Canada).
The Avro Arrow held the promise of Mach 2 speeds (2,104 km an hour) at altitudes exceeding 50,000 feet and was intended to serve as the Royal Canadian Air Force’s primary interceptor into the 1960s and beyond.
This new Canadian plane could pose a major problem for Soviet military aircraft.
Khrushchev’s spy network in Canada had itself determined that the Federal cabinet of Canadian Prime Minister John George Diefenbaker was split on the issue of continuing the Avro Arrow program.
The mounting costs in continuing the program as well as technical delays and government budget reductions were leading some cabinet ministers to ask for cancelling the program.
A few cabinet ministers thought Canada should go ahead with building “the greatest plane of all time”.
In the autumn of 1958, Prime Minister Diefenbaker named one of Canada’s leading civil servants Ludwig Ludlow to conduct a secret study into the project and to determine what was to be done.
By Christmas of 1958, it had come to the attention of Khrushchev that Ludlow was going to recommend to Diefenbaker that despite the financial risks associated with the program, it would be in Canada’s best interests to go ahead with it.
Something must be done.
Fortunately for Khrushchev and the Soviets, they did have an ace up their sleeve.
For it turned out that Ludwig Ludlow was “as horny as Hell” (to put it mildly).
What later more politically correct generations would have labelled by the more therapeutic sounding term “sex addict”, the folks in late 1950s Canada would have called “one horny bastard”.
For Ludwig Ludlow made young Massachusetts Sen. John F. Kennedy look like a male vestal virgin by comparison.
And for those purposes a very young beautiful and shapely British Communist named Linda Cannon was brought in to serve the Soviet motherland.
Linda Cannon as she appeared to Ludwig Ludlow at a hotel in Ottawa Canada on Christmas Eve in 1958.
Linda Cannon came through with flying colours.
And Ludwig Ludlow came through with what future generations would have labelled “multitudes of DNA samples”.
The cat was in the bag.
And the cameras were in the cat house.
Ludwig Ludlow’s wife was a member of a prestigious and wealthy Winnipeg family.
To be cut off from her and her family’s assets as a result of an extramarital affair with a Soviet agent would mean that what Ludlow would be sleeping with in the future was a blanket donated by the Salvation Army.
Ludlow caved in to Soviet demands and gave the recommendation to Diefenbaker that the Avro Arrow project be cancelled.
On February 20th 1959, the Canadian government of Prime Minister John George Diefenbaker officially cancelled the Avro CF-105 Arrow jet-fighter interceptor program.
The Avro Arrow was dead.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday July 4th
2021.
Perverted Roman Emperor Elagabalus Bangs Village Person Dutch PM Mark Rutte In The Rear At Amsterdam YMCA
Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was having a vision of the dream that the Netherlands’ “Lot’s wife pillar of salt challenged” Prime Minister Mark Rutte was currently having.
Mr. Rutte who couldn’t decide on being a cowboy, an Indian chief, a policeman, a construction worker, a disco dancer or a BDSM leather boy poster child when he grew up settled for becoming Prime Minister of the Netherlands instead.
Mr. Rutte was currently having a dream where he was in the sauna room of the local YMCA in Amsterdam.
He was being sodomized in the rear end by the ghost of the perverted Roman Emperor Elagabalus (circa 204-March 11th 222 AD, reigned as perverted Roman Emperor from 218 to 222 AD).
Elagabalus was singing,
“In the Navy, you can sail the Seven Seas in the Navy,
you can bend over if you please in the Navy…”
With that the cross-dressing Emperor Elagabalus bent Mr. Rutte over and let him have it full throttle where the sun don’t shine.
Elagabalus shouted for joy as did Dutch Prime Minister Mark Rutte.
With the coming together in unity-in-diversity of perverted ancient Roman Emperor Elagabalus and perverted modern Dutch leader Mark Ratte, Ratte shouted, “Hungary objects to such activities. Therefore we must kick Hungary out of the European Union.”
All in all, Michelangelo reflected, it would probably be best for Hungary if it did leave the European Union.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday June 27th
2021.
Cleopatra
Queen Cleopatra
Alexander’s city
Alexandria of Egypt
haunted by a Queen
Where Nile meets the sea
Great Mediterranean blue
This queen walks like ghost
Nile river barges
Sail into golden sunset
Fall under her spell
Mysterious queen
Casts a giant shadow still
On these surging waves
-A series of haiku
written by Christopher
Friday June 11th
2021.
Scavenger Hunt On The Amalfi Coast
The ghost of Orson Welles was sitting in an arm chair in the living room of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s colossal London mansion and reflecting on a yacht trip he had made to Italy’s Amalfi Coast in 1953.
The Amalfi Coast is a stretch of coastline on the Tyrrhenian Sea located in the Gulf of Salerno in Southern Italy.
Welles recalled he wasn’t quite sure how he got to the Amalfi Coast.
The last thing he remembered was being on Spain’s Meditteranean coast and imbibing in several glasses of red wine.
The next thing Welles remembered was waking up on a yacht off the Amalfi Coast.
The yacht belonged to an Arab sheikh.
Welles got off the yacht not far from the town of Ravello.
He wandered around the town and ran into an acquaintance fellow actor Humphrey Bogart.
Bogart was in the town along with actresses Jennifer Jones and Gina Lollobrigida and actors Robert Morley, Peter Lorre and Bernard Lee.
They were shooting the 1953 adventure comedy film Beat The Devil.
Bogey teased Welles as they sat in a small outdoor cafe.
“Well, Orson, this film is obviously about beating you,” Bogey smiled, “You’re usually playing a villain in most of your films whether it’s a megalomaniacal newspaper publisher, an ex-Nazi on the verge of becoming a U.S. Supreme Court justice’s son-in-law, a post-war black marketeer on the streets of Vienna or a Renaissance Borgia prince. Your characters are usually human devils of some form or another. Thus as the film title suggests Beat The Devil is about beating you.”
Welles wasn’t about to take this insult lying down.
He answered, “I did play a heroic role in the 1947 film The Lady From Shanghai where my soon-to-be ex-wife played the villainess. Besides in many of your film roles in the 1930s, you often played gangster or mean tough guy roles.”
“Yes but later I played great heroic roles like Rick in Casablanca and Philip Marlowe in The Big Sleep so I was quite the heroic hero whereas you were usually the villainous villain,” Bogey laughed.
“Well, pick a game,” Welles challenged, “I bet I can beat you at it. And then we’ll see who’s the Devil.”
At that moment Gina Lollobrigida approached.
Bogey told her about Welles’ challenge.
The Italian actress suggested an old fashioned scavenger hunt.
Welles and Bogey agreed.
Gina said she would pick what was to be located and found.
She gave the same list to each actor.
Both Welles and Bogey set out on the scavenger hunt.
Welles had spent the entire morning searching.
And he had located what was to be located on Gina’s scavenger list.
Now it was early afternoon and Welles came to the final item on the list.
“What?!” Welles exclaimed, “Find the Greek goddess Hera sitting on a piece of driftwood on the beach? How is that even possible?”.
Still Welles headed down to the beach.
Where he noticed a beautiful woman who looked like a goddess sitting on a piece of driftwood on the beach.
“Excuse me,” Welles addressed the woman, “but you aren’t the Greek goddess Hera by any chance?”.
“I am, Mr. Welles,” the goddess answered, “I’m a big fan of yours so I came down from Mount Olympus to help you beat Bogey.”
Welles took Hera to the cafe where sat Gina and Bogey.
Bogey was looking dejected as he had been unable to find the goddess Hera sitting on a piece of driftwood on the beach.
When Welles introduced the woman as Hera and swore on a King James Bible that he had found her sitting on a piece of driftwood on the beach, Bogey objected, “I believe that you did find her sitting on a piece of driftwood on the beach but how do we know this woman is really Hera?”.
Hera then called on the gods Zeus and Hermes to appear.
When they did so appearing out of thin air, Bogey conceded defeat while Gina looked very surprised.
Angered by his scavenger hunt loss, Bogey went for a car ride where he got into an accident losing several of his teeth.
As a result while adjusting to the loss of his teeth, Bogey was unable to speak clearly and therefore actor Peter Sellers (who was not then well known at the time but had a talent for imitating voices) was hired to dub some of Bogey’s lines speaking like Bogey.
Some of the lines had to be re-dubbed because Sellers instead of speaking like Bogey spoke like Indian actor Hrundi V. Bakshi whom Sellers would later play in the 1968 movie The Party.
And thus that was how through the help of the Greek goddess Hera, Welles was able to beat Bogey at a scavenger hunt.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday June 10th
2021.
Alfred The Great Receives A Visit From Cana Cludhmor
Alfred the Great Receives A Visit From Cana Cludhmor
Alfred the Great (848/49-26th October 899) was king of the West Saxons from 871 to 886 and then king of all the Anglo-Saxons from 886 to 899.
He was the youngest son of King Aethelwulf (reigned 839-858) who died when Alfred was young.
Alfred’s three older brothers Aethelbald, Aethulberht and Aethulred all reigned before him.
When his last older brother Aethulred died in April 871, the kingdoms of the Anglo-Saxons were under siege by the Vikings.
While Alfred was busy with the burial ceremonies for his brother, the Danes defeated the Anglo-Saxons at an unknown spot in Alfred’s absence.
Alfred then went on to meet the Danes at the Battle of Wilton in May 871.
He was defeated smashing any remaining hope that Alfred could drive away the invaders from his kingdom.
Alfred was instead forced to make peace with them and pay them tribute.
When the young Alfred returned to his castle shortly after the battle and had gone to bed falling into a deep sleep, he was awakened by the sound of a harp playing.
Alfred looked up and noticed a beautiful woman standing there playing the harp.
“Who are you?” Alfred asked as his loyal, faithful and ever alert (?) watch dog continued to sleep on the rug besides his bed.
“I am Cana Cludhmor the inventor of the harp,” the woman answered.
“You sound Irish?” Alfred noted.
“Indeed,” the woman nodded, “The Irish venerate me as their goddess of music, inspiration and dreams.”
“What do you want?” Alfred asked.
“Be not discouraged by your recent defeat by the Vikings,” Cana Cludhmor said, “For the next time you are awakened by the playing of my harp again, note you shall achieve victory against the Danes.”
Seven years later in May 878 Alfred was awakened by Cana Cludhmor’s harp playing and went on to defeat the Vikings at the Battle of Edington (also known as the Battle of Ethandun).
One of the terms of the Danish surrender was that Guthrum the leader of the Danish Great Heathen Army convert to Christianity.
Three weeks later Guthrum and 29 of his chief men were baptised at Alfred’s court with Alfred becoming Guthrum’s godfather.
Guthrum took the baptismal name of Aethelstan.
Under his baptismal name of Aethelstan, he ruled as king of East Anglia from 879 to 890.
And thus with the playing of an Irish Celtic harp, Alfred the Great defeated the Vikings.
-A short story written by Christopher
Thursday May 26th 2021.
Orson Welles On The Orient Express
The ghost of Orson Welles sat in a comfortable arm chair in the living room of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s colossal London mansion.
He was sipping a spectral glass of spectral red wine.
He was reflecting on a dream he had as a young mortal man where he was contemplating directing a spy film set on the Orient Express.
Agatha Christie had published a Hercule Poirot novel called Murder On The Orient Express back in 1934.
The spy film set aboard the Orient Express that Welles was planning to make would have been done 20 years before Sean Connery’s 1963 James Bond film From Russia With Love part of which was set aboard the Orient Express.
However Welles’ idea for the film was rejected by film studio heads.
When Welles had the dream that became the basis for the proposed film, he dreamed he was back in the mid-1930s.
Soviet Stalinist agents had stolen the Spear of Longinus (the spear said to have pierced the side of Christ as recorded in the New Testament) from the Hofburg Palace Museum in Vienna, Austria.
They were now riding the Orient Express to Istanbul where they would then board a ship from Istanbul to Odessa.
And then from Odessa the Soviet Stalinist agents would head to Moscow and then to Stalin.
However Nazi spies were also on the trail of the Soviet agents as Hitler too desired to possess the Spear of Longinus for world conquest.
Britain and France had likewise sent their best agents to recapture the Spear of Longinus.
Welles played the British agent Sir Cyril Bellerophon.
He was to rendezvous with France’s top agent aboard the Orient Express.
All Welles’ Bellerophon knew was that the French agent’s initials were ML.
As Welles’ character of Sir Cyril Bellerophon sat in the empty dining car (as it was currently neither breakfast, lunch or dinnertime aboard the train), a beautiful woman entered the Orient Express dining car and approached him.
She walked up to Welles’ Bellerophon and said, “Bonjour Monsieur. Je suis Monique Labelle.”
Welles bowed and said, “Bonjour Mademoiselle. Je suis Sir Cyril Bellerophon.”
It had occurred to Welles that Monique LaBelle (whose intials were ML) was the French agent.
That turned out to be the case.
Welles thought it was a shame he woke up from the dream and had no idea how the whole scenario would end.
Still he had a chance to kiss Monique Labelle before he woke up.
And that Welles’ ghost reflected as he lit himself a spectral cigar was the important thing.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday May 25th
2021
Morgan Le Fay
Picture of Morgan Le Fay
“So you’re trying to track down the original painting that appears at this website?” British MP Renfield R. Renfield asked Dashwood Forrest the owner and curator of the Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London.
“I am,” Forrest nodded, “I’ve come across sketches of this portrait in various books and they say it’s a portrait of Morgan Le Fay.”
“The Arthurian era enchantress?” Renfield sipped a martini, “But the woman in this portrait looks like a woman of the 1930s judging by her hairstyle and style of dress. I thought Morgan Le Fay died back in the Arthurian era.”
“There were rumours that back in 1930 an archaeologist found her grave on the Isle of Avalon not far from Glastonbury and a spiritist medium friend of the archaeologist used her incredible occultic powers to bring Morgan Le Fay back from the dead,” Forrest explained.
“And someone in the decade of the 1930s painted her picture?” Renfield finished his martini.
“Yes,” Forrest nodded.
“I wonder who?” Renfield looked at the website photograph of the painting as Forrest shrugged.
. . .
The ghost of Winston Churchill and the ghost of Orson Welles were sitting in comfortable armchairs in the living room of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s colossal West London estate.
Both were smoking spectral cigars.
Churchill was sipping a spectral brandy.
And Welles was sipping a spectral glass of spectral red wine.
“Anyways,” Churchill continued with his story to Welles, “In my painting career, I painted in various different painting styles. I once painted what looked to be in style a black and white photo of Morgan Le Fay but it was actually a painting. One I must say I was exceptionally proud of. Sadly, Clementine didn’t like it and gave it away to someone. She wouldn’t say who. She didn’t want me to get it back. I think Clementine was jealous of Morgan Le Fay’s exceptional beauty.”
“Do you mean Morgan Le Fay the Arthurian era enchantress?” Welles almost spilled his spectral glass of spectral red wine all over his ghostly suit, “But I thought she died back in Arthurian times.”
“She was apparently brought back from the dead in 1930,” Churchill explained.
“Is she still alive today?” Welles asked.
. . .
“Is this seat taken?” The beautiful and attractive young woman asked Dracul Van Helsing in the Saint George’s Pub.
“No, it most definitely is not,” Van Helsing answered.
The woman sat down in the pub booth directly across from Dracul Van Helsing.
Her dress, her fur covering, her necklace, her gloves, her hairstyle and appearance seem to have been accurately and prophetically depicted by one Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill many decades ago.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday May 21st
2021.
Satanic Witch Kathleen Sebelius Is An Apostle of The Antichrist
July 16, 2021 at 10:47 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (Covid Communism, Kathleen Sebelius, Renfield R. Renfield)
BBC News Announcer: British MP Renfield R. Renfield continues to find himself at the center of controversy.
Earlier this week the colourful MP publicly called for the assassination of French President Emmanuel Macron after Mr. Macron announced that he would like to implement a vaccine passport in France.
Then this past Wednesday Mr. Renfield recorded and released his own paraphrased version of the John Lennon song Imagine.
That song sent George Soros, Bill Gates, Xi Jinping and WHO head Dr. Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus into fits of apoplexy from which they’re yet to recover.
Today Renfield made a statement at a press conference that sent former U.S. President Barack Obama into a fit of apoplexy from which he’s yet to recover.
This latest controversy started this past Tuesday when former Obama Administration Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius appeared on CNN’s OutFront program and said that Americans who have not received a Coronavirus vaccine should not be allowed to work or have access to children and should be limited on where they are allowed to go.
Today Renfield at his press conference publicly called for former U.S. Health Secretary Kathleen Sebelius to be assassinated.
(A video clip is then shown of Renfield)
Renfield (speaking): “Ms. Sebelius in making these statements has shown herself to be one of many despots and demagogues on the globe who would seek to impose tyranny on the world in the name of their self-professed “expertise in health”. The greatest Catholic philosopher of all times Saint Thomas Aquinas said that tyrannicide (the killing of a tyrant) is a morally justifiable form of killing. It is for the common good (that tyrants like her are always yacking about) and for the glorious cause of freedom (that tyrants like her have no idea what it means) that this woman should be dispatched from this life and sent on her merry way to the flames of Tartarus where she belongs.”
A short animated music video about 6 seconds in length (that Renfield made and produced) is then shown on the screen behind Renfield.
The short animated music video shows former U.S. Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius singing a few paraphrased lyrics from John Lennon’s song Imagine.
Sings Kathleen Sebelius,
“You might think I’m an asshole
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday July 16th
2021.
The lovely Pier Angeli at Port Afrique in 1956 prophetically says
to the ugly satanic witch Kathleen Sebelius in 2021,
“I renounce you as Christ’s enemy and Antichrist’s disciple.”
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