Canada’s Throne Speech and Krampus Carries Off Vienna’s Cardinal Schonborn
Canada’s Throne Speech and Krampus Carries Off Vienna’s Cardinal Schonborn
“So,” Amadeus asked his friend British MP Renfield R. Renfield, “Did you hear that after Justin Trudeau had finished making fun of Donald Trump at the Buckingham Palace reception the other night, he grabbed a box of opium laced catnip, came out to the Set Estate, gave the opium laced catnip to the Boss’ guard and watch cat Nefertiti Galore to send her off to La-La-Land and then proceeded to engage in mystical communion with the pot smoking desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever?”.
“I heard that,” Renfield acknowledged after he watched the garbage men sanitation engineers getting high after emptying the garbage cans containing Nefertiti Galore’s cat litter.
“I assume that Justin then probably met his alien friend Gali-Gula the ET gray from Planet Nibiru who’s possessed by the spirit of the ancient Roman Emperor Caligula?” Amadeus ate his toast.
“Harvey Tallbanger tells me that he did,” Renfield nodded, “Gali-Gula helped Trudeau write the Canadian Governor-General’s Speech From The Throne which was read today at the opening of the new session of the Canadian Parliament in Ottawa.”
Amadeus read from the Canadian throne speech on his laptop the following words, “We all share the same space/time continuum on the same planetary spaceship.”
“I think Justin was not the only one inhaling Strawberry Fields Forever’s exhaled pot smoke,” Renfield remarked, “Gali-Gula must have imbibed a great deal as well to pen that whopper of a line.”
“Moving on to another subject,” Amadeus read to Renfield the following news item, “It was announced this past December 3rd that Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen who was 20th Century America’s greatest Roman Catholic evangelist and preacher has had his beatification ceremony postponed. He was supposed to be beatified this coming December 21st but the ceremony has been postponed. Apparently the first time in Church history that a beatification ceremony has been postponed. What’s up with that?”.
“Apparently certain members of the USeless Conference of Catholic Bishops objected to Sheen being beatified,” Renfield replied.
“Why would they object to Sheen being beatified?” Amadeus inquired.
“Because Sheen was a staunch anti-Communist and what’s more he was truly intellectual and scholarly in his anti-Communism unlike most members of the John Birch Society. Therefore true Communists detested Sheen even more than they did the John Birch Society whom they just regarded as a bunch of “proletarian deplorables”. An elitist attitude still shared by 21st Century female Marxist candidates for President.”
“You’re saying certain members of the USeless Conference of Catholic Bishops are Communists?” Amadeus was shocked.
“Yes, either Communist or predatory homosexual (who sexually assault altar boys and young seminarians) or both,” Renfield nodded, “Sheen did not get along well with the predatory homosexual Archbishop of New York City Francis Cardinal Spellman. Hence Spellman’s modern day disciples among the USeless Conference of Catholic Bishops can’t stand Sheen either.”
“Wow,” Amadeus shook his head.
“Elizabeth Scalia an airheaded associate of the ludicrous Bishop Robert Barron who thinks Hitler, Stalin, Mao and Pol Pot are in Heaven since there’s nobody in Hell according to his Dare We Hope That All Are Saved? Theology (both Jesus of Nazareth and Raymond Red Reddington of The Blacklist could easily tell him “No.”) tried to say that Sheen himself was gay by calling him a “flouncy” in one of her Twitter tweets. She obviously never saw the episode of What’s My Line? where Archbishop Sheen as a guest easily charmed the women panelists. Most women can easily tell whether a man is gay or not unless of course they’re as stupid as Elizabeth Scalia.”
“Who’s leading the USeless Conference of Catholic Bishops’ charge against Bishop Sheen’s beatification?” Amadeus inquired.
“The spirit of Antichrist filled Archbishop of New York City Timothy Cardinal Dolan and the spirit of Antichrist filled Archbishop of Chicago Blaise Cardinal Cupich,” Renfield answered, “The usual suspects.”
. . .
Peter Whitstable the man they call the Fox Mulder of Interpol was walking the streets of Vienna the Austrian capital.
He stood in front of Saint Stephen’s Cathedral in Vienna where recently a Baphomet worshipping music and dance concert was held there with the permission of Christoph Cardinal Schonborn the Archbishop of Vienna.
As Whitstable stood there, he suddenly noticed Cardinal Schonborn himself walking down the street.
Suddenly Krampus the infamous half-goat half demon who used to follow around the saintly bishop Saint Nicholas came down the street.
Krampus was carrying his bag full of naughty individuals he was taking to Hell on this Krampusnacht (the evening of December 5th- the night before the Feast Day of Saint Nicholas which was December 6th).
Krampus picked up Cardinal Schonborn with his hairy arms and threw him into his bag.
He then went down a sewer no doubt on his way to Hell.
Whitstable bought himself a candy cane from a street corner Santa Claus.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday December 5th
2019.
The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec singing at a concert hall in Vienna while outside in the streets, Krampus is carrying Vienna’s screaming Archbishop Cardinal Schonborn in a bag on his way to Hell.
215 Years Since Napoleon Bonaparte’s Coronation In Notre Dame Cathedral
215 Years Since Napoleon Bonaparte’s Coronation In Notre Dame Cathedral
It was 215 years ago today that Napoleon Bonaparte had himself crowned as Emperor of the French in Notre Dame Cathedral.
Pope Pius VII had held the crown at the coronation ceremony in Notre Dame but Napoleon grabbed the crown from the pontiff and crowned himself Emperor of The French.
The Kraken Napoleon VI (who was a huge admirer of the original Emperor Napoleon I) decided to mark the occasion by having himself crowned Emperor of the French again.
He had himself crowned Emperor of the French by the Monsignor of Notre Dame Cathedral back on December 2nd 2015.
But no one in the French government or any voters among the French electorate recognized the Imperial Coronation much to the Kraken’s disappointment.
Of course on this particular occasion Notre Dame Cathedral was now closed to the public since the April fire in the cathedral earlier this year.
And the Monsignor of Notre Dame Cathedral attended classes on the Quran every Monday night so he was unable to attend for the Kraken’s re-coronation service this evening.
So the Kraken decided to hold his re-coronation ceremony (marking the original Napoleon’s 215th year of coronation) in front of Paris’ famous Arc de Triomphe.
He wore neo-Napoleonic French Imperial robes designed by the House of Chanel to easily accommodate his 8 arms.
He hired a stork (who had tired of the baby delivering business) to fly down and deposit the Crown of Napoleon I on his head after fireworks had gone off and the Orchestre de Paris had finished played a stirring rendition of La Marseillaise as well as the theme music from the 1983 James Bond film Octopussy.
The ceremony went off without a hitch.
Donald Trump, who was currently in London for tomorrow’s 70th Anniversary meeting of NATO, watched the coronation ceremony on British television.
Trump thought to himself, “I really should have myself crowned Emperor of America.”
. . .
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was likewise in London for the 70th Anniversary meeting of NATO.
He had recently heard the good news from CSIS (Canadian Security Intelligence Service) that a pair of time travellers had gone back in time and rescued his pet pot smoking desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever from being murdered by PRC Ministry of State Security operatives on Xi Jinping’s orders.
Justin Trudeau had heard that Strawberry Fields Forever was currently being kept on the colossal London estate of the Egyptian billionaire Set who owned the multi-billion dollar research and development firm Set Enterprises.
Trudeau directed the Canadian Embassy car to be driven to the Set mansion so he could re-unite with his old friend Strawberry Fields Forever.
However Justin did not announce his visit and the Embassy car was set upon by the Set Estate’s guard and watch cat Nefertiti Galore who tore the Rolls-Royce limousine apart with her claws.
She then set out after the Canadian Prime Minister and the Embassy chauffeur.
The Embassy chauffeur managed to escape.
Justin wasn’t so lucky.
He had his clothes ripped off by Nefertiti Galore’s claws.
He was then arrested by Scotland Yard police for exposing himself on the streets of London.
. . .
British MP Renfield R. Renfield and his friend the vampiress Mei-ling Manchu were in London and were walking back from a service commemorating the victims of last Friday’s London Bridge attack.
Renfield happened to walk in the way of Donald Trump who happened to be exiting his limousine.
Trump who thought Renfield could be as easily pushed around as the Prime Minister of Montenegro a couple of years back pushed Renfield out of the way.
Big mistake on Trump’s part.
Renfield turned around and punched Trump in the head sending his golden urine coloured toupee flying 50 feet down the street.
Secret Service agents tackled Renfield to the ground thinking he was an assassin.
Big mistake on the Secret Service agents’ part.
Mei-ling Manchu moved quickly into action and used her martial arts skills to kick and send all of the Secret Service agents flying over the dome of Saint Paul’s Cathedral.
A dirigible flying above the dome carried John Donne’s message, “Ask not for whom the bell tolls. It tolls for thee.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday December 2nd
2019.
Ghosts of Lenin, Caesar Augustus and Big Julius On A November Evening
Ghosts of Lenin, Caesar Augustus and Big Julius On A November Evening
Today marked the 102nd anniversary of the Russian Bolshevik Revolution.
And Hades (the Greek god of the Underworld) accompanied by his 3-headed dog Cerberus was being driven in a fire proof chariot through the flames of Tartarus.
They pulled up alongside the barbecue spit that Soviet leader Vladimir Lenin was roasting away on.
As Lenin was busy screaming, Hades waved him a cheerful hello.
“I have great news, Vladimir,” Hades smiled a Pepsodent toothpaste smile, “a group of Hollywood celebrities have asked that I grant you a temporary 24 hour dispensation from Tartarus so that you can attend a Hollywood dinner in your honour to celebrate the 102nd anniversary of the Bolshevik Revolution.”
“That’s great,” Lenin acknowledged between his screams.
As Lenin’s ghost was being temporarily freed from Tartarus, the ghosts of Julius Caesar and Caesar Augustus were already sitting in the Oval Office of the White House.
“Gentlemen,” Trump helped himself to some Russian caviar, “you’re probably wondering why I asked you to be here with me today. Well as you know those nasty Democrats in Congress are trying to impeach me accusing me of “high crimes and misdemeanours” which is a total lie.
I’ve never taken drugs and been high in my entire life.”
“What do you want with us?” The ghost of Caesar Augustus waved aside a plate of mushrooms that Trump offered him recalling a plate of mushrooms that his wife Livia Drusilla once offered him in his mortal life which was the last dish he ever ate.
“I’m glad you asked,” Trump helped himself to a smoked oyster, “I’m thinking of declaring an end to the Republic and proclaiming myself Emperor of America. So I need your advice. Julius, you thought of making yourself Emperor and ended up being assassinated by a group of Senators on the Capitol steps on the Ides of March. So I try to avoid the Capitol steps these days. Augustus, you actually did make yourself Emperor. So, of course, I’m quite anxious to talk to you.”
“Why do you want to make yourself Emperor?” Julius asked.
“Well just on the off chance that I’m impeached and the very off chance I’m found guilty by 2/3 of the Senate at my Senate trial, I can’t be removed from office obviously being the great divine personage that I am. So I’ll have to proclaim myself Emperor so the American people can continue to enjoy my great and unparalleled wisdom for years to come.”
Julius and Augustus both blinked at the last statement.
“Just look at the poor quality of people proclaiming themselves Emperor these days.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday November 7th
2019.
Sherrielock Holmes On All Saints Day
Sherrielock Holmes On All Saints’ Day
From left to right- Estella, her husband British MP Samuel Poundsworth and Sherrielock Holmes (the lesser known but immortal twin sister of Sherlock Holmes)
“It is what it is,” Sherrielock Holmes remarked to British MP Samuel Poundsworth and his wife Estella.
Sherrielock was visiting the Poundsworth estate in northern England on this November 1st in 1936.
MP Winston Churchill was also a guest.
Earlier that evening, the four had attended an All Saints Day service at a church not far from the Poundsworth Estate.
After the service, as the four walked back to the estate, Churchill had remarked, “I don’t know if Germany’s Fuhrer Adolf Hitler is THE Antichrist but he’ll be as close to the Antichrist as you can get in our times.”
Poundsworth and his wife said nothing.
They had encountered Churchill’s rants about Hitler many times before.
In fact the entire British Conservative Party caucus under Stanley Baldwin was getting very sick of Winnie’s constant harping on the subject.
Sherrielock said nothing either but secretly she agreed with Churchill’s assessment on the subject.
That night Poundsworth and his wife heard a commotion coming from one of the guest bedrooms- Sherrielock’s room.
They entered and saw Winnie putting his dressing robe on.
He hurried across the hall to his own room, grabbed an easel, a canvas, his paints, a small chair and a very very extra comfortable cushion and announced he was going outside to do some nighttime painting.
Estella and Samuel looked at Sherrielock.
Sherrielock smiled and said, “It is what it is.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday November 1st
2019.
70th Anniversary of People’s Republic of China and Mei-ling Manchu Becoming A Vampiress
70th Anniversary of The People’s Republic of China and Mei-ling Manchu Becoming A Vampiress
0ctober 1st 2019.
Beijing.
The 70th Anniversary of the People’s Republic of China.
It was 70 years ago today that the Communist forces under Mao Tse-tung took control of most of mainland China while Chiang Kai-shek and his Kuomintang Nationalist forces fled to the island of Taiwan.
Communist China’s paramount leader Xi Jinping marked the 70th anniversary by parading China’s latest military hardware through the streets of Beijing.
The latest missiles, warheads, drones and tanks passed by Xi’s viewing stand as he and his supernatural entity advisor the Black Dragon applauded vigorously.
In Taiwan rather ominously, a bridge collapsed in a major harbour trapping a fishing boat and overturning an oil tanker.
Hong Kong celebrated the 70th Anniversary of Communist rule in China by Hong Kong police shooting its first protestor with a live round ammunition bullet.
. . .
The 70th Anniversary of the Chinese Communist takeover was the last thing on Pope Francis’ mind at the Vatican as he sat at his desk and began the final preparations for this month’s Pan-Amazonia synod.
Last year he had sold out the members of China’s underground Catholic Church by entering into a treaty with the Beijing government that had been negotiated on the Vatican’s behalf by the predatory homosexual prelate the then Cardinal Theodore McCarrick.
Back in February of this year, Pope Francis had been forced to laicize Theodore McCarrick after he had been caught and exposed for his numerous crimes and misdemeanours.
A knock was heard on the door of Francis’ room.
It was the Zeus worshipping cardinal known as JM (which was the cardinal’s code name as head of the Vatican Secret Intelligence Service) inviting Pope Francis to receive a blessing from Amazon indigenous sha-men and sha-women who were assembled in the papal chapel.
. . .
Melania Trump was startled when she saw the ghostly figure of Abraham Lincoln standing before her in the corridor.
Tears were falling down Lincoln’s cheeks.
Meanwhile in the Oval Office, Melania’s husband Donald was busy tweeting about how civil war would break out in the U.S. should he the Donald be impeached.
. . .
This date of October 1st 2019 also marked 70 years since Mei-ling Manchu (who was a leading operative for the Chinese Ministry of State Security aka MSS) had become a vampiress.
Mei-ling (who had sided with Mao’s Communists against Chiang’s Nationalists during the Chinese Civil War of 1945-49) had marked the victory of the Chinese Communist forces on October 1st 1949 by allowing herself to be bitten by a vampire and turned into a vampiress as she stood on the balcony of Beijing’s Old Imperial Palace with victory celebration fireworks going off in the background.
Mei-ling Manchu: celebrating 70 years as a vampiress today.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday October 1st
2019.
Margarita Carmen Cansino, Orson Welles and Jack Benny
Margarita Carmen Cansino, Orson Welles and Jack Benny
The Norse trickster god Loki sat at the controls of the CERN Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland.
He had just finished sampling a month’s supply of Chemical of The Day Club (as opposed to Book of The Month Club) samples sent to him by a friend in Australia who went by the cheery sounding name of Uncle Ernie.
With Uncle Ernie’s Chemicals of The Day fully in control of his mind, Loki was now creating many a time warp down at CERN.
With Liberace and Olivia Newton John performing a duet of the song Let’s Do The Time Warp Again (from The Rocky Horror Picture Show) in the background, Loki was doing much temporal mischief.
The ghost of Orson Welles (who currently lived as a spectral guest in the colossal London mansion of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set where, along with the ghost of Sir Winston Churchill, he served as a spirit advisor to British MP Renfield R. Renfield) found himself sent back in time to the year 1935.
Tears came to Welles’ spectral eyes when he saw the young Margarita Carmen Cansino (who was later forced by Hollywood studio producers to change her name to Rita Hayworth) standing there.
“I should have been a more loving husband to her,” Welles’ ghost sobbed as he ordered a bottle of Chardonnay from the studio gopher.
“I can’t believe the nerve of that white guy who wanted to audition for the role of Charlie Chan,” Margarita Carmen Cansino shook her head.
“Would that have been Warner Oland?” Welles asked.
“No,” Rita shook her head, “Some non-talented entity from up in Canada who had listed High School Drama Teacher in Vancouver on his resume.”
Welles’ ghost went over to the next studio where the great American comic actor Jack Benny was holding auditions for his next movie.
Some obviously white guy wearing blackface stood on stage at the microphone.
“Hi,” said the man, “My name is Justin Trudeau and I’d like to audition for the role of Rochester.”
“Someone get that bum out of here,” Benny remarked.
Cerberus the 3-headed dog from the Underworld of Hades chased the Rochester wannabe off stage.
Welles began returning to the year 2019 when Loki hit another control at CERN.
As Welles whizzed through the year 1968, he encountered a newspaper boy shouting, “Read all about it. Peter Sellers beats out a Canadian for the role of Hrundi V. Bakshi in the movie The Party.”
Welles went back momentarily to the year 1965 where Mel Brooks the Executive Producer of the TV series Get Smart was remarking, “I don’t even want that Drama teacher auditioning for this role never mind getting it,” as a KAOS villain shouts, “Not Claw, Craw!”.
Welles eventually landed back in 2019 where he arrived in the Set Mansion living room as Amadeus was watching the 2016 remake of The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday September 21st
2019.
Sherry and The Unicorn
Sherry and The Unicorn
The golden colours of autumn
Shone brightly around the hills and trees
As Sherry set out from her beautiful rustic old farmstead and grounds
Autumn was her favourite time of year she reflected
As a cool autumn breeze blew gently through her dark hair
Sherry loved to go on evening walks
Sometimes alone
Or with her dog
Or one of her children
Tonight she was alone
Alone to contemplate
And silently communicate with both God and Nature
Which was one of her favourite past times
Contemplating and communicating with both God and Nature
She set out on the path
That would take her along the river
And by the woods
In her eyes both peace and sadness
Peace from communicating with God and nature
Sadness from the night her nearly 3 year old daughter died from pneumonia
In her arms
On the night when the worst March snowstorm of the century hit Western Europe
And ambulances were unable to get through the snow drifts
To reach the farm stead
And rush the girl to hospital
Sherry gave the impression of one who had lived a thousand lives
For her eyes seemed to reflect the wisdom of one who had
She had been born in the Malaysian province of Sarawak
On the island of Borneo
Through her veins flowed the blood of the Iban
Who were the famed Head Hunters of Borneo
Whose exploits and ferocity
Were the stuff of folk lore
But were now a gentle and loving people
Since the light of Christ had been brought to them
Also the blood of the Malay flowed through her veins
The people who gave Malaysia its name
On her father’s side she had both Chinese and Japanese ancestry
For her paternal grandfather and paternal grandmother had a Romeo and Juliet style love story
But one with a happy ending
Her grandfather was Japanese
Having been born into a noble Japanese Samurai family
Of one of the many Samurai clans that existed throughout Japan
And still existed prior to Gen. MacArthur’s governorship of the country in the post-World War II years
Now those mighty Samurai clans existed only in history books and ancestral family stories
And of course Hollywood and Japanese films
But her grandfather a noble Samurai knight
Had fallen in love with a Chinese woman
In a time period when the Samurai clans had fallen under the sway of Tojo
And an extreme militaristic form of Shintoism
Whose Japanese master race theories about Japanese racial superiority among Asians
Were matching Hitler’s German racial superiority theories about
German racial superiority
Among the peoples of Europe
So it would not do for a Japanese samurai knight
To fall in love with a Chinese woman
And worse still as far as his family and clan
were concerned-
He wanted to marry her!
Keep her as a kept woman if you must
His immediate male family members told him
But do not, under any circumstances, marry her.
But this noble Samurai knight was truly noble by nature
And not noble in name only.
He married the woman he loved-
A woman of China!
The result was the the pronouncement of a Japanese Samurai clan’s equivalent
Of an Iranian ayatollah’s fatwa-
A death edict for both the Samurai
And his bride!
The couple fled as far away from the reach of the Samurai clans as they could get
To the island of Borneo!
And many years later Sherry was born
The granddaughter of these star-crossed lovers
Sherry was teased as a child
Because the village because of the darkness of her eyes
Thought her the reincarnation
Of the River serpent woman
Who haunted her village and family folklore
A great great great grandmother several generations back in her Iban family tree
Who had a human body for the top part
But a serpent body for the bottom part of her body
It was said the River serpent woman
had extremely dark eyes
And Sherry had the darkest eyes of any female currently living in her family
But that was Sherry’s past
And the sights of autumn and deer
And rabbits and squirrels was Sherry’s present
The unicorn sat down in the clearing of the woods
A magical and enchanting creature
In an age where the only magic and enchanting were done by dark beings
And therefore magical enchanting creatures of God were rarely seen
Of course the Unicorn being an essentially shy creature preferred it this way
Being able to walk the woods and hills freely without being gaped at by other creatures
Particularly those creatures with 2 arms and 2 legs and ten fingers and 10 toes who seemed to be particularly fond of gaping
Particularly those who carried those annoying little objects in their hands
And were always emitting flashes of light at themselves
Particularly as they stood alongside other creatures
The unicorn looked up
And then paused
For one of those creatures
He was just thinking about
Was standing on the other side of the River
And looking at him.
The unicorn thought about turning to run
He turned its gaze back to the creature
And the creature did something odd for this type of creature
Instead of getting closer to get a better look at him
The creature sat down on the banks of the River
And just looked
Not an annoying look either
Just a contemplative look
It was not eying the Unicorn either for dinner or emitting a flash
From an object in its hand
Just a gentle look
A look that seemed to acknowledge
The Unicorn as a fellow subject
Rather than an object to be simply gaped at
For the sake of gaping
The creature on the other side of the River then smiled at the Unicorn
That was it!
A simple smile
It seemed to be a kind smile
The Unicorn thought
Not a nasty or self-absorbed smile
That too often seemed to accompany the countenance
Of creatures like these
For some reason the Unicorn felt inclined to cross the River
On the other bank now
As the Unicorn stood
He noticed the creature with the kind smile
Had still not made any movement towards it-
The Unicorn.
The Unicorn approached and bowed its head and horn within inches of the creature with the kind smile
The creature with the kind smile gently patted his head and horn
And smiled some more.
The Unicorn gave the creature its own kind smile
And walked back across the River and then into the woods from whence it came.
When she returned home, some of her children called out to Sherry,
“Did you have a good walk, Mom?”.
“Yes, I did,” Sherry nodded as she took off her coat, “A very good walk.”
“Did you see anything?” The children asked.
“Yes,” Sherry smiled, “I saw some deer. And some rabbits and a squirrel.”
Sherry put her finger to her lips and mused aloud, “And let’s see. What else did I see?”.
Then she thought some more and then smiled, “Oh yes. And I saw a Unicorn.”
“Oh, Mom!” The children giggled and laughed.
-A poem written by Christopher
Sunday September 15th
2019.
Renfield Discusses Bozos Heading Amnesty Canada International, The Coming Middle East War and Drones Hitting Saudi Refinery
Renfield Discusses Bozos Heading Amnesty International Canada, The Coming Middle East War and Drones Hitting Saudi Refinery
“I am NOT an impotent bed wetter with a small penis.”
-Alex Neve, Secretary-General of Amnesty International Canada snivelling in response to the latest political volley shot at him by Alberta Premier Jason Kenney
When asked by the news media to drop his trousers and his drawers in order to provide substantial empirical proof to back up his denial, Mr. Neve declined to do so.
Meanwhile over in London England, British Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn stood up and left a pub when he saw the Egyptian god Anubis enter.
Meanwhile in another corner of the pub, British MP Renfield R. Renfield and his friend Amadeus Emanon were discussing the world geopolitical situation.
“So, what’s this war of words going on in Canada between Alex Neve the Secretary-General of Amnesty International Canada and Alberta Premier Jason Kenny?” Amadeus asked as he ordered the Alberta Angus steak sandwich medium rare.
“Well Alex Neve being your typical Marxist-Leninist inclined climate change obsessed radical environmentalist nut case thinks that building pipelines and putting people in Alberta’s oil and gas industry back to work is a gross violation of human rights,” Renfield replied.
“That’s kind of a different claim to make,” Amadeus sipped his tea.
“It’s not how Lenin, Josef Stalin, Mao Tse-tung and the current House of Saud’s idea of violating human rights would work but then Canada is a country that recently legalized marijuana,” Renfield pointed out.
“What can I get you for dinner, sir?” The waitress asked Renfield.
“The two piece cod Fish and Chips, please,” Renfield handed her back the menu.
“So, what do you think of the possibility of a major regional war breaking out in the Middle East sometime in the foreseeable future?” Amadeus asked.
“Well, it’s always possible that a major Middle East regional war won’t break out this year although even that possibility is becoming more and more unlikely,” Renfield said, “however in the longer term, saying that a Middle East regional war will NOT break out in the next few years makes about as much sense as saying that someday a member of America’s contemporary so-called progressive/liberal left will actually come to understand what Marxist-Leninism and Fascism actually are in their historical antecedents rather than in the pseudointellectual dream world that most American progressives and liberals seem to exist in.”
“Wow, then that definitely does not look good for world peace,” Amadeus admitted.
“And it may not look good for world peace in the very very immediate future if Benjamin Netanyahu’s Likud Party continues to do poorly in the polls in the next few days leading up to the Israeli general Election,” said Renfield, “Netanyahu is the sort of political personality that would prefer World War III breaking out rather than the absolutely horrific (in his opinion) possibility that he might cease being Prime Minister of Israel. Even saying he’d annex the Jordan Valley and the northern Dead Sea area didn’t give Netanyahu the boost in the polls that he desires. So obviously he may have to resort to the last resort of starting a war with Iran in order to save his political skin.”
“I see someone launched a drone attack on the oil refinery at the Abqaiq facility and the Khurais oil field run by Saudi Aramco in Saudi Arabia early this morning,” Amadeus noted, “The closure will impact 5 million barrels of crude oil processing per day which is half of Saudi crude oil production and 5 percent of the world’s daily oil production. We may soon see $100 per barrel oil.”
“That’s right,” Renfield nodded, “The Houthi rebels of Yemen are claiming responsibility for the drone attacks while others are saying that it’s Iran itself behind the attacks. U.S. Secretary of State Mike Pompeo who seems to have replaced John Bolton as the war hawk in the Trump Administration is now making the claim that it’s Iran itself which is behind the attacks.”
Meanwhile in that other corner of the pub, Anubis the Egyptian jackal headed god was reading a copy of the Last Will and Testament of Czar Nicholas II of Russia that was given to him by Virgil the longest serving librarian at the Bodleian Library at Oxford.
Meanwhile the Syro-Phoenician mermaid goddess Atargatis had shape shifted into human form and had traveled back in time and was now a Russian countess at her palatial manor in Saint Petersburg on the eve of the Bolshevik Revolution.
She stood at the window of the manor alongside her dog.
The Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing (who had likewise traveled back in time) approached her.
“Do you know where Apophis is?” Van Helsing asked Atargatis.
“On the battleship Aurora,” the goddess answered.
“That’s what I thought,” said Van Helsing.
Apophis was the Great Serpent in ancient Egyptian religion and the ancient Egyptian god of chaos and destruction.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday September 14th
2019.
Dracul Van Helsing, The Goddess Sophia, Yaldabaoth and The Irish Backstop
Dracul Van Helsing, The Goddess Sophia, Yaldabaoth and The Irish Backstop
Sophia the Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom was worried.
What would happen to her son Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun if a hard border was once again built on the Republic of Ireland-UK Northern Ireland border?
Her son Yaldabaoth was a leprechaun with a serious drinking problem.
He was the only being in all recorded history to be officially banned by court injunction from attending AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) meetings as any meeting he attended invariably ended up with all those present at the meetings falling off the wagon.
Yaldabaoth had the irritating habit of always falling asleep right on the line of the Republic of Ireland/UK Northern Ireland border.
This was fine as long as the border was an open (rather than a closed) border as it had been ever since the Good Friday Agreement was signed back in 1998.
But Good Friday 1998 might come to an end at Halloween 2019 if there was a no-deal Brexit.
Of course the House of Commons and the House of Lords had just passed a bill brought forth by the anti-Semitic Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn to stop a no-deal Brexit from happening this coming Halloween (ironically in this regard Corbyn was fulfilling the agenda of the pro-globalist, pro-EU and New World Order One World Government oriented Rothschilds).
However the trouble was British MP Renfield R. Renfield was backing Boris Johnson in his quest to have Brexit by Halloween 2019.
And Sophia the Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom being wise knew that one should never underestimate Renfield R. Renfield even though the pro-EU segments of the British Parliament and much of the British and American news media were doing just that.
Boris Johnson may have run out of tricks up his sleeve but Renfield hadn’t.
Already Sophia could visualize a Brexit firecracker exploding in Jeremy Corbyn’s rear end as the clock hit 11:59 PM on October 31st 2019 and Renfield shouted “Trick or Treat” from the window of his room in a Soho whore house.
And if a no-deal Brexit occurred and there was once again a hard Irish border, her son Yaldabaoth could end up buried underneath a concrete wall.
Unlike the American authorities and the whereabouts of Jimmy Hoffa, she’d know where the body is buried.
But this would be of small comfort to her.
After all, she had told people through the centuries that her son Yaldabaoth was the Demi-Urge who created the material physical universe.
And if it came out that her son was actually an Irish leprechaun with a serious drinking problem who now lay buried under concrete on the Irish border, well, she’d positively die of embarrassment.
Of course Sophia knew that the Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing was a friend of Renfield R. Renfield.
She figured that if she whipped him up her famous Greco-Egyptian-Irish-Italian-Norse-Greenlander omelette for breakfast and gave him a great tantric sex piece of tail as a midnight offering, he might put in a good word for her with Renfield.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 6th
2019.
30th Anniversary of The Fall of The Berlin Wall
November 9, 2019 at 11:08 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, News, Video) (Arabella, Berlin Wall, fall of the Berlin Wall, The 30th Anniversary of The Fall of The Berlin Wall)
30th Anniversary of The Fall of The Berlin Wall
It was 30 years ago today on a magical and memorable night that the Berlin Wall came down.
For those of us alive then and old enough to remember the moment, it was one of the rare moments of joy that one experiences when it seems however briefly that the world is as one.
As King Arthur said in that old mid-20th Century Broadway musical, “For one brief shining moment, there was Camelot..”
And it was indeed one very brief shining moment.
Less than a year later, Iraq’s Saddam Hussein would invade Kuwait and set in motion a tragic string of events that would haunt the world for the next 30 years.
A genocide would occur in Rwanda in 1994.
The former Yugoslavia would see “ethnic cleansing” as that federation broke apart.
Bill Clinton as President of the United States in early 1999 delivered an ultimatum to Serbian leader Slobodan Milosevic that not only threatened Serbian sovereignty over Kosovo but Serbian sovereignty over the rest of Serbia as well.
The threat was delivered to Serbia by Clinton’s New World Order globalist loving Secretary of State Madeleine Albright (whom more perceptive commentators of the time referred to as Madeleine Half-bright and quite possibly less than that).
Milosevic quite naturally refused to cede Serbian sovereignty over Serbia to NATO and the UN so Clinton ordered a NATO aerial bombardment of Serbia that lasted 78 days.
Seeing their Slavic Orthodox cousins and allies the Serbs bombed, Russia ended whatever rapprochement it had with the West that had been unfolding since the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989 and embarked on a different policy.
Russian President Boris Yeltsin, who had previously sought to be a friend of the West, named a former KGB operative Vladimir Putin as Prime Minister of Russia in August 1999 and then named Putin his successor as President on December 31st 1999.
So thanks to horny and Serb bombing Bill, the rapprochement between Russia and the West would go down the drain.
And Bill’s witch bitch wife Hillary would go on to blame Russia and its assets every time she lost a Presidential race which was quite often (first the Democratic nomination to Barack Obama in 2008 and then the Presidency itself to Donald Trump in 2016).
September 11th 2001 (or 9/11 as it’s now known) produced the totally opposite feelings of the feelings evoked on November 9th 1989.
That magical night when the Berlin Wall came down, it felt like world peace would break out.
That tragic day when the Twin Towers came down, it felt like world war might break out.
Between Ronald Reagan in Berlin in 1987 speaking those words, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall” and Donald Trump in 2016 telling his supporters, “Let us build a wall”, a lot of water has flowed under the bridge.
10 years ago tonight, I had made a short animated music video at Goanimate to celebrate the then 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall.
Since I did not have a paid membership at GoAnimate to upload videos directly to YouTube I used my camera to film the video directly off my GoAnimate page on my old iMac computer and then uploaded that recording from my camera to YouTube.
Arabella was the name of my animated character that I had created at GoAnimate.
I had her appearing in a short Star Trek video with Captain Kirk.
I had her appear with Sherlock Holmes in solving a mystery.
I had her investigating a haunted house in a ghost story video I made.
But this was the only Arabella video I had shot with my old camera and uploaded to YouTube directly.
Because when GoAnimate went to Paid membership only sometime in the early 2010s, it deleted all the videos of its non-paying members.
So consequently this Arabella music video I made on the fall of the Berlin Wall is the only animated video I made at GoAnimate that I have left:
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