The John William Waterhouse Painting
An oil painting by John William Waterhouse (April 6th 1849- February 10th 1917)
Dashwood Forrest the famous London art curator was sitting in his art gallery The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery waiting for any customers to walk in through the door.
It was a Saturday night.
A Saturday night in mid-June.
Dashwood Forrest’s art gallery was generally busy on a Saturday night in autumn or winter but rarely on a Saturday night in spring or summer.
The sole exception was during the years of the plandemic of 2020-2021 when his art gallery was pretty well closed all year long.
Forrest was thus surprised when he saw someone walk through his door.
Unbeknownst to Forrest, the man was on the run from Special Branch of the Metropolitian London Police.
The man had stolen a top secret document.
A secret agreement signed between George Soros, Bill Gates, Klaus Schwab, Pope Francis and the 2 leading religious authorities in Islam.
The man thought he’d drop into The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in hopes he could escape his Special Branch pursuers.
“Good evening,” Forrest stood up from his desk.
“Good evening,” said the man, “I’d… uh… like to look at some paintings.”
“Certainly,” Forrest smiled, “We have some very good originals along this wall here.”
“What an absolutely lovely painting,” the man walked over to one and looked at it intensely.
“That’s a reproduction not an original,” Forrest explained, “It’s a reproduction of an oil painting by the British Pre-Raphaelite painter John William Waterhouse whose art works were known for their depictions of women from both ancient Greek mythology and Arthurian Legend.”
Forrest added, “And none of the women who served as models for the subjects in Waterhouse’s paintings would have been beheaded by Pan Goatee had he lived back in the day.”
“What is the name of this particular Waterhouse painting?” The man asked, “I notice there’s no name in the description.”
“Just a minute,” Forrest went over to his desk and his gallery catalogue, “I’ll look and see.”
“What a beautiful woman,” the man looked at the subject of the painting.
Suddenly the man looked through the gallery window and noticed the operatives of Special Branch approaching the gallery.
“Oh God,” the man prayed, “let me into the picture.”
Forrest returned, “I can’t seem to find the name..”
Dashwood stopped speaking.
The man had disappeared.
Special Branch walked through the door.
“Excuse me,” said the head honcho as he flashed his badge, “Has anyone been in the gallery tonight?”.
“Well there was a gentleman who was here who was inquiring about this reproduction of a John William Waterhouse painting but he seems to have disappeared,” Forrest answered.
“That’s one John William Waterhouse painting I don’t seem to recognize,” said a female Special Branch operative who had been an Art History major at Cambridge.
Forrest looked at the painting and gasped.
For the man who had been standing and talking to Forrest in the gallery minutes earlier was there.
In the painting.
Talking to the beautiful woman in the picture.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday June 18th
2022.
The Vampiress of Notre Dame
The vampiress rose from her tomb in the crypt of Notre Dame
This vampiress (who was a worshipper of the Egyptian deities Isis, Osiris and Horus) had been given a tomb in the hidden crypt of Paris’ Notre Dame Cathedral on the orders of Emmanuel Macron shortly after he became President of France in May 2017.
A visitor was being brought to the crypt.
Escorted by two armed Freemasons.
The visitor was one of the few Catholic priests in Germany who still believed in the Incarnate Deity of Christ.
The German Church which now called itself the Synodal Church was doing everything possible to throw out 2000 years of Catholic Faith and doctrine.
In this they were secretly backed by the Satanic AntiPope Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis).
For Francis hoped to boldly take the entire universal Catholic Church where the German Synodal Church had gone before.
The vampiress rose from her tomb, bit the Christ believing German Catholic priest on the neck with her incisors and completely drained his body of blood.
In the Cathedral above the hidden crypt, French President Emmanuel Macron was busy discussing his plans for the revamped and rebuilt (“Build back better” to quote World Economic Forum Chairman Klaus Schwab and his senile old fool puppet Joe Biden) Notre Dame Cathedral (that had suffered a devastating fire back on April 15th 2019) with the ghost of Vichy French leader Marshal Henri Philippe Petain.
“What,” the ghost of Orson Welles asked his companion the ghost of Sir Winston Churchill, “is Macron doing consulting with the ghost of Vichy French leader Marshal Petain? I thought Macron recently defeated the Fascist candidate Marine Le Pen for President of France.”
“Yes but Macron is a closet Fascist,” Churchill smoked his spectral cigar, “Most of the global leaders on the world stage today are either closet Fascists or closet Bolsheviks. Although since the plandemic of 2020-2021 they are not so closeted anymore. Unfortunately most of today’s electorate are too stupid to realize that most politicians are either closet Fascists or closet Bolsheviks. In a statement I made years ago which I consider positively brilliant myself, I said, quote, “The best argument against democracy is a 5 minute conversation with the average voter”. Unfortunately today’s voters are even worse than they were back then when I was alive and well and in political office. And of course the biggest electoral morons on the planet are the voters of the greater Toronto area of the Canadian province of Ontario. Who have returned both Neo-Stalinist metrosexual soy boy Justin Trudeau and fat slob Neo-Fascist Doug Ford to power to their offices of Canadian Prime Minister and Ontario Premier respectively.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday June 10th
2022.
Renfield On The Queen’s Platinum Jubilee
Queen Elizabeth II, then a young Princess, photographed by Cecil Beaton at Buckingham Palace, March 1945
British MP Renfield R. Renfield ended his Thursday night podcast by toasting the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee (70 years on the throne).
Said Renfield, “Today marks the beginning of Her Majesty’s official Platinum Jubilee celebrations.
Although Her Majesty officially ascended the throne on February 6th 1952, she was officially crowned Queen at Westminster Abbey in London on June 2nd 1953.
At the time Her Majesty became Queen upon her father King George VI’s death on February 6th 1952, Winston Churchill was Prime Minister of Great Britain and Harry Truman was President of the United States.
Today Boris Johnson is Prime Minister of Britain and Joe Biden is President of the United States.
So some things have gone considerably downhill in the past 70 years.
At the time Her Majesty Elizabeth II ascended the throne, Josef Stalin was alive and well and the absolute dictator of the USSR.
70 years later the USSR is gone and Xi Jinping is alive and well and the absolute dictator of the People’s Republic of China.
1952 – the year of the Queen’s Ascension- was also the year that Ian Fleming wrote his first James Bond novel Casino Royale.
This would mark the beginning of a great series of spy novels in which a series of spectacular villains- let’s call them Ernst Stavro Blofeld, Dr. No and Goldfinger and a fictional organization named SPECTRE plot to take over the world.
70 years later a group of real unspectacular villains- let’s call them George Soros, Bill Gates and Klaus Schwab and an actual real organization the WEF (World Economic Forum) plot to take over the world.
So a lot has happened and a lot has changed in the past 70 years.
John F. Kennedy wanted to put a man on the moon.
Today’s U.S. Democrats want to put a man in the women’s washroom.”
Renfield then raises a glass of champagne, “To Her Majesty the Queen. Long has she reigned over us.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday June 2nd
2022.
Maria Orsic and Franz Kohler In The Inca Temple of Doom
Nazi vampire Franz Kohler of the SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau and Maria Orsic of the Vril Society in an Inca temple in 1946.
The year was 1946.
The war was over.
And Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau was in South America.
He was now a vampire.
Having been turned into a vampire by the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith in Berlin in the dying days of the Third Reich.
As for Maria Orsic the head of the Germanic Vril Society (a society made up of female psychics and mystics), she had been turned into an immortal by the Norse god Odin in Munich in 1923.
Odin had given her a cup of ambrosia to drink that he had won from the Greek god Zeus during a poker game in Paris.
Maria Orsic and Franz Kohler were currently in an unknown (to the world at large) Inca temple in northwestern Argentina.
The temple was dedicated to the Inca earth mother goddess Pachamama.
Inside the temple was a statue of Pachamama that was said could be used to summon Pachamama herself.
British archaeologist Digby Spencer Churchill (a distant cousin of Winston’s) was hunting for the statue.
Kohler as a dedicated Nazi did not want the statue to fall into the hands of the British and especially not into the hands of the Churchill family.
Unfortunately for Kohler and Orsic as they flew into the region by plane the map they had been given was drawn by a blind man who suffered from amnesia and had not been in the region since childhood.
Thus they were somewhat behind Digby Spencer Churchill in getting to the small statue.
They looked down into the bottom chamber of the temple with their guns drawn and saw Digby picking up the small statue.
“All right, Digby, put down that statue and put your hands up,” Kohler commanded.
“What happens if I don’t?” Digby inquired.
“We’ll shoot you dead,” Kohler replied.
Digby put down the statue but instead of putting his hands up, he reached into his own pocket and pulled out a gun and began firing at the vampire.
“Unfortunately for you, Digby, I’m a vampire so your bullets unless they’re silver are totally useless against me,” Kohler grinned.
“So that’s what my mother must have meant when she told me to get the lead out,” Digby reflected out loud.
“On the other hand, you did thoroughly wreck and ruin a nice 100,000 pesos suit,” Kohler looked at the bullet holes in his jacket and pants.
Kohler then shot Digby 5 or 6 times (he wasn’t sure how many cartridges the gun held and lost count).
“Bloody Hell,’ Digby sputtered, “Shooting a fellow before he’s had the chance to enjoy his afternoon tea. Awfully unsporting of you.”
Those were the final words Digby spoke before he kicked the bucket.
The bucket after Digby had kicked it landed on top of the statue and smashed it into a thousand pieces.
“Bloody Hell,” Kohler broke into an apoplectic vampiric fit.
“Perhaps,” Maria Orsic suggested, “If we take it to a Jesuit seminary somewhere in Argentina, they might know how to put it back together again.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday May 10th
2022.
The Baron and The World Economic Forum
British MP Renfield R. Renfield, after fighting off a demonic attack by Beelzebub (the demon had been invoked at a recent satanic ritual ceremony), delivered his Saturday evening podcast.
Said Renfield, “The Rothschild contolled The Economist Magazine showed how totally out to lunch they are this past week by devoting an issue to praising one of the biggest scumbags of our time Bill Gates.
They praised his efforts to control pandemics when in fact he’s been the one launching pandemics as part of his Neo-Malthusian world population reduction plan. They praised his plans to fight climate change even though the idea that man-made CO2 emissions are causing climate change is a bunch of pseudo-scientific garbage pushed by the global elites in their desire to bring about a totalitarian One World government. They praised Bill Gates’s desire to control the global food supply which shows just how openly satanic the Rothschilds and The Economist Magazine are. Bill Gates controlling the food supply will lead to billions of people starving to death (Joseph Stalin will be green with envy as he’s busy roasting away on his rotating barbeque spit down in Tartarus as he only managed to starve 3 to 4 million Ukrainian people to death during the Holodomor of 1932 to 1933).
The fact that Bill Gates is today the biggest owner of farmland in America should be of concern to every American.
His plant-based meat (which tastes like crap) is no doubt a foreshadowing of the Apostle Paul’s prophecy in 1 Timothy 4:3 that the Antichrist will be “commanding to abstain from meats, which God hath created to be received with thanksgiving of them which believe and know the truth.”
Already government, “woke” (i.e. zombie brain dead) industry and business, advertising and TV commercials are promoting the idea that eating real meat such as beef, pork, turkey and chicken should be given up to fight climate change.
This is all part of the World Economic Forum agenda to bring about a totalitarian One World government.
If you look at the World Economic Forum page on Wikipedia, you’ll see there photos of the 3 biggest scumbags in the Western world today- Klaus Schwab, Bill Gates and George Soros.
All of whom are good friends of the Satanic AntiPope Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis).”
. . .
January 18th 1971 was the 100th anniversary of Germany having united as a country under Otto von Bismarck.
It had also been 100 years to the day since Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen (a potential rival to Bismarck becoming the 1st Chancellor of a unified Germany) had his soul claimed by the demon Beelzebub and taken down to Tartarus.
Although the slippery Baron had escaped from Tartarus numerous times since then.
On January 18th 1971, the Baron made a 100th anniversary “of his soul being claimed by Beelzebub” escape from Tartarus.
As Beelzebub and his demonic imps set out to track him down, Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen approached a German engineer and economist Klaus Schwab with an idea for establishing a global synthesis of Hitlerian German National Socialism (on a global scale) and Soviet Leninism (on a global scale) to bring about a totalitarian One World government.
Enthused and intrigued by the Baron’s ideas, Schwab started the World Economic Forum a few days later on January 24th 1971 in the Cologny canton of Geneva, Switzerland.
Although the name Schwab adopted for the organization at the time was the European Management Forum.
It changed its name to the World Economic Forum in 1987 at the suggestion of a New Age Messianic individual who called himself the Maitreya (a forerunner of the Antichrist of Biblical prophecy).
When Beelzebub sought to take the ghost of Hermann von Luftwaffen back to Tartarus in January 1971, the demon found himself overruled by his demonic superiors.
The Baron remains a leading ghostly advisor to Klaus Schwab to this day.
An artist’s rendition of a leading Freemasonic satanic ritual performed back in the early 2000s
-A vampire novel chapter
written Saturday May 7th
2022.
85th Anniversary of The Hindenburg Disaster
Today is the 85th anniversary of the Hindenburg disaster
World famous and much beloved genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee celebrated the 85th anniversary by beheading and dismembering a stupid repulsively uglo little brat who ran across a street against a walk signal.
The satyr was standing at an intersection waiting for the light to change.
As it changed, he noticed a stupid repulsively uglo little brat running across the street against a walk signal.
The uglo managed to escape being run over by cars but she didn’t manage to escape being beheaded by Pan Goatee’s astral laser machete.
“If you’re female and living in Calgary, make sure you’re beautiful if you’re going to start ignoring traffic signals. Otherwise if you’re a repulsively uglo little brat like you are, this is going to happen to you,” Pan Goatee pointed out as he beheaded the stupid repulsively uglo little brat.
He then cut the stupid repulsively uglo little brat up into 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x 999 trillion x infinity and beyond x ad infinitum x 999 trillion etc. etc. pieces.
Krampus arrived to pick up the remains of the stupid repulsively uglo little brat and carry them down to Tartarus.
Later as Goatee was on his way home, he noticed a fat ugly blimp out walking her dog.
Goatee beheaded her and cut her up into 999 trillion pieces.
The dog now free ran off into the sunset.
He passed the Norse wolf Fenrir who was walking in the neighbourhood looking for his father Loki (who had recently been killed by a thunderbolt shot at him by the Greek god Zeus. Unfortunately for humanity, the evil Dr. Anthony Fauci was working to bring Loki back from the dead. Along with Nancy Pelosi who had been beheaded yesterday by a Mexican-American toddler on the occasion of Cinco de Mayo).
It was 85 years ago today that the Hindenburg airship exploded over Lakehurst New Jersey causing 35 fatalities (13 passengers and 22 crewmen) from the 97 people on board (36 passengers and 61 crewmen) and an additional fatality on the ground.
The cause of the fire was a fierce lightning storm in the area (although the Nazis claimed it was sabotage).
This year the ghost of Orson Welles directed a documentary (that was not shown on PBS) explaining the cause of the ferocious lightning storm in the area.
It all dates back to a notorious scoundrel named Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen whose soul was collected by the demon Beelzebub back on January 18th 1871.
Von Luftwaffen holds the Cosmos’ cosmic record for most escapes from Tartarus.
His latest escape from Tartarus occurred on May 3rd 1937.
He boarded the Hindenburg at Frankfurt, Germany on that same date as the airship left on its journey across the Atlantic to the U.S. Navy Base at Lakehurst, New Jersey.
Days earlier a 33rd Degree American Freemason had been assigned the rotating barbeque spit right next to Hermann von Luftwaffen’s rotating barbeque spit down in the flames of Tartarus.
The Mason had a message for Baron von Luftwaffen from Henry A. Wallace who was Franklin D. Roosevelt’s Secretary of Agriculture (Wallace later served as FDR’s Vice-President from January 20th 1941 to January 20th 1945. The phrase Annuit Coeptis Novus Ordo Seclorum was put on the back of the U.S. $1 bill in 1935 at Wallace’s suggestion).
Wallace had discovered through research by his friends in the Theosophist Society that Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen had been descended on his mother’s side from Adam Weishaupt the founder of the Bavarian Illuminati.
Wallace had also learned from Theosophist spiritist medium and mystic Nicholas Roerich that Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen also held the Cosmos’ cosmic record for most successful escapes from Tartarus.
Although von Luftwaffen was always caught and brought back to Tartarus by the demon Beelzebub.
Wallace promised the Baron via the rotating roasting Freemason that if he managed to escape from Tartarus again, he could get a job working for him Henry Wallace.
And thus it was that von Luftwaffen escaped from Tartarus and boarded the Hindenburg on his way to the U.S.
However the demon Beelzebub was waiting for him at Lakehurst New Jersey.
Beelzebub the prince of the demons of the air was the cause of the lightning storm in the area.
As he went forth to collect von Luftwaffen’s soul for the umpteenth time, a lightning bolt caused by Beelzebub’s action struck the Hindenburg and caused it to burst into flames.
-A vampire novel chapter
written Friday May 6th
2022.
Cinco de Mayo: 160th Anniversary of The Battle of Puebla
Today is Cinco de Mayo the 160th Anniversary of the Battle of Puebla that was fought during the Franco-Mexican War in which the Mexican forces of Benito Juarez defeated the French forces of Emperor Napoleon III.
Genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee celebrated the occasion by beheading an ugly looking stoat looking uglo female who was trying to beat him to the entrance of a 7-Eleven store and cutting her up into 999 trillion pieces.
When he got into the store, he discovered that the demon Krampus had already bought up all the bottles of salsa for Cinco de Mayo celebrations.
A documentary that was never shown on PBS and was directed by the ghost of Orson Welles explained how two vampiresses were involved in the Battle of Puebla on May 5th 1862.
The Paris-based ancient Egyptian vampiress Isis (the wife of Osiris and the mother of Horus) was backing Napoleon III’s French Army.
The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec was backing the Mexican forces loyal to Mexican President Benito Juarez.
Qonzilqointec defeated Isis sending the Egyptian vampiress back to Paris in a huff.
The festive occasion of the 160th Anniversary of Cinco de Mayo was marked in Mexico and various regions of the United States.
The pro-Baal and Moloch child sacrifice loving scumbags of Antifa were spending Cinco de Mayo in Los Angeles California attacking people and police and calling for the deaths of U.S. Supreme Court justices.
The Set Enterprises Intelligence Unit sent a giant robotic vaccum cleaner to deal with the scumbags of Antifa.
The vacuum cleaner sprayed the Antifa scumbags with a burning saline solution and then sucked them up in a tube filled with blades that cut up their arms and legs as they went up the tube.
Scumbag politicians like senile old fool Joe Biden, ugly looking witch Nancy Pelosi and California’s Gov. Gavin Newsom (a worshipper of Tezcatlipoca the Aztec god of darkness, evil and sorcery to whom human sacrifice was performed. The opposite of his brother Quetzalcoatl who was Qonzilqointec’s godfather) all objected to the Set Enterprises Intelligence Unit’s giant robotic vacuum cleaner.
“What’s good enough for little babies isn’t good enough for the scumbags of Antifa,” wicked witch Pelosi shrieked through rivers of flowing red and black mascara.
Pelosi was beheaded by a Mexican-American toddler (whose birthday was today Cinco de Mayo) whose parents had bought him a toy replica of Pan Goatee’s astral laser machete for the occasion.
Others like British concert pianist, musician, singer and songwriter Amadeus Emanon (best friend of British MP Renfield R. Renfield) spent Cinco de Mayo by thinking about Mexican contributions to culture, food, the arts and music.
He thought fondly of Mexican-American singer, songwriter and musician Selena Quintanilla.
-A vampire novel chapter
Written Cinco de Mayo
Thursday May 5th
2022.
The Baron and Beelzebub
A statue of Beelzebub suddenly appeared mysteriously atop Castle von Luftwaffen
Back on January 18th 1871 Germany united as a nation under Chancellor Otto von Bismarck.
Hwever unbeknownst to history Bismarck had a rival named Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen.
Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen at a huge banquet at Castle Luftwaffen on January 18th 1846, after overindulging in sauerkraut and sausage, decided on a whim to sell his soul to the demon Beelzebub for 25 years of wealth and power.
Baron von Luftwaffen got his 25 years of wealth and power.
However as January 18th 1871 approached, Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen started feeling nervous.
The demon Beelzebub would soon be arriving to collect his debt.
He also was ticked at the fact that Germany would soon become a united Empire for the first time in almost a millenium since the days of Frederick Barbarossa King of Germany and Holy Roman Emperor.
He was wanting to become the first Chancellor of a reunited Germany.
He was planning to send his rival Otto von Bismarck a large slice of poisoned venison (deer meat) for a banquet that the Prussian leader was planning.
Unfortunately for von Luftwaffen, Bismarck’s chef burnt the venison so the venison wasn’t served.
After consulting with a Church lawyer (a Jesuit), Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen discovered that if he could become immortal, his contract with Beelzebub would become null and void since he von Luftwafften couldn’t die and his body and soul couldn’t become separated.
The baron wasn’t sure how he could become immortal.
He didn’t have enough time to find the Fountain of Youth in Florida or search through various ancient, medieval and Renaissance documents for a possible elixir of eternal life or a spell to make him immortal.
However his spies informed him that the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith had been seen in Berlin.
Perhaps Lilith could turn him into a vampire and he could enjoy a form of vampiric immortality.
On January 17th 1871 Lilith turned Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen into a vampire.
Baron von Luftwaffen rode back in triumph to his ancestral home Castle von Luftwaffen.
He went for a walk atop his castle.
He was shocked to see a statue of Beelzebub atop one of his castle towers.
He was so shocked that he stood there absolutely petrified.
When morning arrived, the statue of Beelzebub came to life as the demon Beelzebub.
Beelzebub grinned and said,”Don’t you know that as a vampire you shouldn’t be standing there in the sunlight?”.
Baron Hermann von Luftwaffen gave an anguished cry as he burst into flames.
Beelzebub collected his soul.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday May 4th
2022.
The Lounge Singer
Cantolina Aguirre the lounge singer
It was May 1949.
And Carson Cody Albion was sitting in a high class cocktail lounge in Los Angeles.
The name of the lounge was The Purple Canary.
Albion wasn’t sure whether there was such a thing as a purple canary.
He thought most canaries were yellow.
But then again up until 1697, most Europeans thought all swans were white.
Then came 1697.
And Dutch explorer Willem de Vlamingh discovered black swans in Australia.
So maybe there are purple canaries.
Perhaps someday one will be found on the moon.
What made him think of the moon just now?
His eyes and ears returned to the singer and the song.
Cantolina Aguirre was singing the song Blue Moon.
When the song was over, Cantolina Aguirre came and sat at Albion’s table.
“Nice of you to sit here,” Albion smiled.
“I’m your contact,” Cantolina explained.
“Contact?” Albion looked puzzled.
“Didn’t Soong Mei-ling hire you to escort weapons from the Aladdin Tea Company Warehouse to the ship Blue Tiger down at the docks?” Cantolina inquired.
Soong Mei-ling was Madame Chiang Kai-shek the First Lady of the Republic of China.
She was the wife of Generalissimo Chiang Kai-shek the President of China.
The Kuomintang Chinese Nationalist government was currently in trouble and there was the possibility that China could fall to Mao Tse-tung’s Communists.
Concerned people across the U.S. were sending arms to Chiang’s government worried that the U.S. government wasn’t doing enough.
“She did,” Carson nodded, “but I was expecting my contact to be Chinese.”
“I was born in Shanghai,” Cantolina answered, “My father worked at the Spanish Consulate in the city.”
“Wow, don’t I have egg on my face,” Albion remarked after a waiter accidentally spilled Egg Foo Yung all over him.
Cantolina gave him the passwords he was to use at both the warehouse and the loading docks for the ship Blue Tiger.
Albion stood up to go on his mission.
“I’ll be working here until 2 AM, ” she said as she got up to return to the stage.
“Do you ever make love to any of your contacts?” Albion asked before leaving.
Cantolina grabbed a napkin and wrote on it with her red lipstick.
She then folded the napkin.
“Here’s the answer,” she said as she handed him the folded napkin, “Don’t open it until you walk through that door again.”
Later after Albion had completed the mission, he returned to The Purple Canary and walked through the door.
He opened and unfolded the napkin to read her red lipstick answer to his question.
ONCE IN A BLUE MOON.
Cantolina noticed his entrance and his unfolding of the napkin.
She immediately began singing the song Blue Moon.
-A Carson Cody Albion Short Story
Written by Christopher
Monday May 2nd 2022.
The Panther Woman and The God of Surprises
Claudia Simon The Panther Woman
Carson Cody Albion, a private eye then based in New Orleans, was spending April of 1935 visiting New York City.
He was visiting an old college acquaintance of his who had now become an inspector in the New York Police Department.
“Inspector Hennessy,” his secretary brought into her boss’ office the private eye from New Orleans, “a Mr. Carson Cody Albion to see you.”
“Carson, my old friend,” the Inspector rushed to greet him.
They discussed old times and college days.
And how the philosopher Hegel (who they had both studied in the same philosophy course they took) was a major pain in the ass.
However Hegel’s influence on the world was profound in the decade of the 1930s.
Hegel, as interpreted through the lens of the left wing Hegelians particularly Marx, was influencing Bolshevism and Communism.
Hegel, as interpreted through the lens of the right wing Hegelians particularly Nietzsche, was influencing Nazism and Fascism.
Inspector Hennessy was then discusing cases he was working on.
One involved a wild animal walking the streets of New York City.
A black coloured panther with golden green eyes who ripped out the throats of its victims.
The other involved a serial killer dressed as a clown who slashed the throats of his victims.
Beside his victims, he left a fortune cookie that always had the same message, “Be prepared to be surprised by the god of surprises.”
Albion said he’d help Hennessy with the case.
As Albion walked back to his hotel, he passed a tarot card reading room.
A very beautiful young woman dressed in the beautiful coloured blouse and skirt of a gypsy woman stood outside.
“A reading, sir,” she smiled at him.
“Why not?” Said Albion.
He did not believe in tarot cards or crystal balls but he had time to kill.
Interestingly enough the reading sort of matched the case his friend Inspector Hennessy was working on.
When the reading was over, the lovely brunette gypsy woman smiled at him and said, “Remember, sir, it takes a thief to catch a thief.”
Curious statement, Albion thought.
Albion was walking by a Church – Saint Raphael’s- when he noticed the priest locking up.
“Good evening, Father,” Albion said.
“Good evening,” said the priest, “You’re Carson Cody Albion are you not?”.
“Why, yes,” Albion nodded, “You know me?”.
“I have a niece who lives in New Orleans,” the priest explained, “She’s sent me newspaper clippings about your exploits. She knows I have a weakness for detective stories- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes, G.K. Chesterton’s Father Brown and Agatha Christie’s Hercule Poirot.”
“Excellent writers and excellent detectives all of them,” Albion acknowledged.
“Working on a case here in New York?” The priest asked.
Albion mentioned the panther and also the clown serial killer who called himself the God of Surprises.
“This clown serial killer the God of Surprises is a sinister individual,” the priest crossed himself with the Sign of the Cross, “I believe he’s human but yet he’s possesed of a supernatural paranormal power that I believe is demonic in origin.”
“What makes you think that, Father?” Albion was curious.
“I have to go to a hospital to hear confessions but meet me here at the rectory at noon tomorrow,” the priest pointed, “It’s right next to the Church.”
Albion agreed.
At 2 AM Albion woke up.
Feeling restless he decided to go for a walk.
He walked past Saint Raphael’s Church and was surprised to see a moving van out in front.
A moving van in the middle of the night?
At a Church?
The movers were moving Crosses and Crucifixes and statues of Mary and the Saints from the Church into the van.
This is curious, Albion thought.
He looked at the name on the van PILTDOWN AND PEKING MOVERS.
Weird, Albion thought.
The following morning Albion again walked in the direction of the Church.
This time for his noon appointment with the priest rector of Saint Raphael’s at the Church rectory.
He was surprised to see CRIME SCENE yellow tape around the Church building.
Albion figured that possibly the middle of the night movers were in fact burglars and he Albion had neglected to stop them.
“What’s happened here, Hennessy?” Albion asked the inspector when he saw him.
“Well aside from the obvious theft of the Crosses and Crucifixes and statues of Mary and the Saints, the priest Father Lacroix was found dead at the altar with his throat slashed,” Hennessy stated, “along with a fortune cookie carrying the message, BE PREPARED TO BE SURPRISED BY THE GOD OF SURPRISES. Witnesses saw a clown carrying a bloodied knife flee the Church building.”
Hennessy and Albion went to talk to the rectory’s housekeeper to see if she knew if Father Lacroix had any enemies.
The housekeeper, an Irish woman in her mid-50s, sobbed that this clown serial killer the God of Surprises must be demonically possessed.
That’s why the Crosses and Crucifixes and statues of Mary and the Saints were taken out so that the demonic clown serial killer The God of Surprises could enter the Church and kill Father Lacroix.
Indeed it turned out there was no such moving company as PILTDOWN AND PEKING MOVERS.
Albion after helping Hennessy had gone to a local public pool for a swim.
While walking through the pool area he saw this woman.
Albion stopped to look at her.
“You recognize me, monsieur?” the woman spoke with a French accent.
As a matter of fact, he had seen a sketch of her.
In the notebook of one Barnabas Van Helsing a vampire hunter who wasn’t quite as famous as his elder brother Dr. Abraham Van Helsing.
Back in the early 1890s the City of New Orleans had been terrorized by a wild black panther with golden green eyes who killed New Orleans citizens by ripping out their throats.
Van Helsing had caught up with the panther who, the vampire hunter had claimed in his notebook, had shapeshifted into a beautiful woman.
The woman, Van Helsing claimed was an immortal, who turned into a panther on certain nights.
She was a 17th Century French noblewoman named Claudia Simon.
Van Helsing had sketched her picture.
Albion recognized the woman standing in front of him as being the same woman in Barnabas Van Helsing’s sketch.
He also recalled something else.
Something the gypsy woman had said to him yesterday.
It takes a thief to catch a thief.
A couple of hours later a very beautiful woman was walking through a dark neighbourhood.
The sounds of the stilettos on her high heeled shoes clicking the pavement.
The constant pulling up of her coat and adjusting of her skirt.
A clown started to follow her.
He carried a knife.
He walked very stealthily behind her and was about to strike… when the woman suddenly turned and spun around on her heels.
He was surprised.
“You appear to be surprised, oh, God of Surprises,” said the woman with a most exquisite French accent.
She turned into a panther and ripped out his throat.
The clown shouted out several last words before he died.
As Hennessy and Albion wrapped up the investigation, they discovered that the clown was a Jesuit priest named Father Edgar Noeticus who had studied under the French Jesuit priest paleontologist Father Pierre Teilhard de Chardin over in China.
No one was sure when Father Noeticus had left China and when he returned to the U.S.
However after he got his throat ripped out by the panther woman, he shouted out one final last cry, “Someday a Pope shall venerate me the God of Surprises.”
In his right hand as he died he clutched a fortune cookie with the message BE PREPARED TO BE SURPRISED BY THE GOD OF SURPRISES.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday April 22nd
2022.
Dracul Van Helsing 
You must be logged in to post a comment.