Lilith Leads Turkish Plane To Shoot Down Armenian Jet

September 29, 2020 at 10:42 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith was in a bad mood.

Yesterday in Ravenna, some supernatural soldiers she tried to recruit to fight for the Azeris against Armenia in the Nagorno-Karabakh Conflict came down with serious ailments.

Thanks to the skullduggery of her arch enemy the Byzantine vampiress Theodora in offering an impromptu offer on free spicy pumpkin lattes, Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow had his carved jack o’ lantern pumpkin head ripped off his shoulders.

The Six Vampiric Knights-Templars had their eyes sprayed with garlic spray (as opposed to pepper spray) by Mulligan the Irish zombie who was working as a manservant to the Byzantine vampiress (he was on loan from the London art gallery curator and art dealer Dashwood Forrest).

Furious upon hearing the news, Lilith sprouted her vampiress bat wings and flew to Turkey.

After a meeting with Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan, she went to a military base where the pilot of a Turkish F-16 was instructed to follow her.

The vampiress bat wing sprouting Lilith flew right into Armenian air space.

60 kilometres (37 miles) into Armenian airspace.

There she encountered an Armenian fighter jet – a Soviet made SU-25.

Distracting the Armenian SU-25 pilot with her ability to shoot spider webs out of her long red fingernails, the pilot of the Turkish F-16 used the momentary distraction to shoot the Armenian jet down.

Sadly the Armenian pilot was killed.

Naturally Turkey denied the claim that it had shot down an Armenian plane in Armenian airspace.

Back at his Presidential Palace in Turkey, Recep Tayyip Erdogan was looking at his reflection in the mirror and modelling the robes he would wear when he crowned himself Sultan of a revived Ottoman Empire.

In London, British MP Renfield R. Renfield was giving a speech in the Westminster House of Commons while Sir Winston Churchill’s ghost sat in the public gallery looking on approvingly.

“How long will it be before Britain and Europe take a firm stand against Erdogan and his bullying? Today it will be Armenia. Tomorrow it will be Greece and Bulgaria. Erdogan is such that he will seek to reverse the results of the 1683 Battle of the Gates of Vienna if he can,” said Renfield.

Renfield’s speech fell on deaf ears.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday September 29th
2020.

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The Byzantine Vampiress Theodora In Ravenna

September 28, 2020 at 11:00 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )


The Byzantine vampiress Theodora in Ravenna Italy – the city that was the capital of Byzantine Italy from 540 AD to 751 AD.

Theodora when in Istanbul yesterday had managed to talk the Transylvanian Count Dracula (aka the Wallachian Prince Vlad Dracula) into going to Armenia and fighting the Azeris over the territory of Nagorno-Karabakh (Nagorno is a Russian word meaning “Mountainous” and Karabakh is the Russian rendering of an Azeri word meaning “Black Garden”. Armenians call the territory Artsakh an ancient Armenian name for the area).

A recently retired Israeli Mossad agent (whose code name was the Controller of the Golem) joined Dracula in fighting alongside the Armenians.

Theodora had come to Ravenna because she had heard that her arch enemy the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith was planning to come to the city to meet with six Vampiric Knights-Templar and their Hessian mercenary ally Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden (better known to the world as the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow).

Lilith was hoping to get the six Vampiric Knights-Templar and the Headless Horseman to fight alongside the Azeris in the Nagorno-Karabakh Conflict.

The six Vampiric Knights-Templar and the Headless Horseman had helped Allatallahbel the vampiress Priestess of Baal (who was an ally of Lilith) seize control of the Vatican back on Friday October 13th 2017.

An event that had not been covered by the mainstream Marxist media in the Western world and they had no excuse of a Covid-1984 plandemic (which they’re always yacking about in this year of 2020) not to have covered the story.

Theodora sat waiting for the Headless Horseman to ride by riding his zombie black horse Bucephalus Reborn that he apparently did at this time of day.

She knew that on this day he’d be riding to meet Lilith.

Theodora meanwhile had put up signs around the city’s cafes and restauraunts that said SORRY, WE’RE ALL OUT OF PUMPKIN SPICE LATTE.

Theodora’s assistant Mulligan the Irish Zombie (whom she had rented from London art gallery curator and dealer Dashwood Forrest) stood not far from her with a coffee stand.

As Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow came riding along with his carved jack o’ lantern pumpkin head, Theodora shouted in Italian to people passing by, “Free pumpkin spice latte if you help yourself to the nearest piece of pumpkin that you can see and bring it over to Mulligan’s Coffee Stand where he’ll make it for you.”

The hapless Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow found himself being charged at by a large group of people who ripped off his pumpkin head and fought over pieces of it before taking slices over to Mulligan’s Coffee Stand.

The Headless Horseman would be unavailable for his meeting with Lilith.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday September 28th
2020.

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Theodora vs. Lilith: Armenia-Azerbaijan Conflict

September 27, 2020 at 9:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

The Byzantine vampiress Theodora and the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith have been involved in their own personal conflict for the past 20 years.

Now that personal conflict has been extended to the former Soviet republics of Armenia and Azerbaijan over the territory of Nagorno-Karabakh.

Earlier today the conflict re-erupted with the heaviest clashes in years.

Today’s fighting involved the use of tanks and other forms of heavy weaponry.

Armenia and Azerbaijan have been fighting for control of the territory since the USSR was dissolved back in 1991.

A ceasefire was agreed in 1994 although there has been sporadic fighting on and off since then.

Though nothing compared to today’s exchange of heavy weapons fire.

Nagorno-Karabakh was an autonomous region within the old Soviet republic of Azerbaijan but the majority of the territory’s population is ethnic Armenian.

When Armenia and Azerbaijan became independent republics, the territory’s Armenians wanted the region to become part of Armenia.

A war was fought leading to one million people being displaced and 30,000 killed.

A stalemate has presided since the 1994 ceasefire.

This past summer Turkey’s increasingly megalomaniacal President Recep Tayyip Erdogan (who fancies himself the new Sultan of a revived Ottoman Empire) had been encouraging Azerbaijan in its efforts to take back Nagorno-Karabakh.

Erdogan’s support emboldened Azerbaijan.

Armenia’s defence ministry said Azerbaijani forces launched an attack on civilian settlements including the regional capital of Stepanakert this morning.

Armenia’s government declared total military mobilization of its forces.

Armenian Prime Minister Nikol Pashinyan warned that the region was on the brink of a large scale war.

In the basement of his house in Wilmington Delaware, senility prone Joe Biden asked his marijuana pot smoking desert cactus plant Sweet Dementia, “How will World War III affect my chances of getting elected President of the United States?” before falling fast asleep into his bowl of Kellogg’s Fruit Loops.

The Byzantine vampiress Theodora hoped to get rid of Erdogan and restore the Byzantine Empire with Constantinople (Istanbul) as its capital.

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith meanwhile was hoping to get Turkey’s Erdogan on board with launching an attack on the State of Israel (Lilith believed that the Jewish people had maligned and libeled her good name in the Babylonian Talmud and so was out for revenge).

Theodora spent much of the past summer beating up Erdogan for turning Byzantine Orthodox Christian churches and monasteries into Islamic mosques.

Lilith spent much of the past summer giving Erdogan blow jobs so that he’d be orally pleasured into attacking Israel.

Since Erdogan backed Azerbaijan in the Nagorno-Karabakh conflict, Lilith did the same.

And since Erdogan backed Azerbaijan in the Nagorno-Karabakh conflict, Theodora backed Armenia.


The Byzantine vampiress Theodora (wearing Dr. Cadbury Rocher developed sunscreen for vampiresses) in Constantinople: She backs the Armenians.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday September 27th
2020.

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Moloch Remembers A Disciple While Justin Wants To Cancel Thanksgiving

September 25, 2020 at 10:50 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

The demon Moloch (invisible to most except those wearing Dr. Cadbury Rocher Polaroid sunglasses but there weren’t many of those) stood on the steps of the U.S. Capitol as a funeral service was being held for one of his favourite disciples who had kicked the bucket last Friday.

Unfortunately Moloch’s brother Baal and his demonic partner in crime Baphomet were unable to find a young virgin vampiress in time and rip out the vampiress’ heart and burn her body so that Moloch’s and their disciple might live a while longer.

A sacrifice of the Inca vampiress Huchuysisa back in January of this year had allowed Moloch’s disciple to live another 9 moths.

Unfortunately a couple of days later the Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing and the ghost of Orson Welles had poured Dr. Cadbury Rocher’s Phoenix Rising Vampiress Resurrection Elixir all over Huchuysisa’s ashes and brought her back from the dead.

Moloch’s disciple had to be hospitalized a few months later after seeing Australian performer Uncle Ernie perform his Marlene Dietrich dance routine in the associate Supreme Court Justice’s private washroom cubicle.

She had to be hospitalized again a few weeks after that after watching a viral video of Uncle Ernie performing the same dance routine when she accidentally typed in the wrong url on her laptop.

Then last Friday after seeing a holographic image (projected by Set Enterprises drones) of Uncle Ernie doing his most unkosher impersonation ever of Sesame Street’s Miss Piggy, Moloch’s disciple had finally given up the ghost.

She had lain in state first in the Supreme Court building and later in the halls of Congress.

Moloch wondered whether he’d ever again find such a devoted disciple.

. . .

Earlier this week in an address to the Canadian nation, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau told Canadians that due to the Chinese Communist Party Wuhan virus (although he used the WHO politically correct term Covid-19), “It’s all too likely we won’t be gathering for Thanksgiving but we still have a shot at Christmas.”

Canadian Thanksgiving is celebrated on the 2nd Monday in October (whereas in the U.S it is celebrated on the last Thursday in November).

Later in a meeting with his supernatural advisor Tezcatlipoca the Aztec god of smoking mirrors (whom he communicated with via a marijuana pot smoking late Victorian/early Edwardian antique mirror called Magical Mystery Tour), Justin was shocked to discover that he didn’t have the jurisdictional power to cancel Thanksgiving.

Tears started running down his Al Jolson minstral show blackface, “I suppose I don’t have the jurisdictional power to cancel Christmas either.”

Being the good Marxist that he was, Justin didn’t believe in people having fun.

He was first planning to cancel Thanksgiving in October and then Christmas in December.

His plans of being a Maoist grinch had come to nought.

How Justin wished he was Daniel Andrews the Premier of Victoria state in Australia and then he could do whatever the Hell he wanted.

The Global TV News Canada disinformation branch of the New World Order Ministry of Propoganda had finished their 5:30 PM Evening broadcast tonight (after their usual regurgitation of hardcore Marxism in the broadcast exemplified by Communist asshole Global correspondent in the U.S. Jackson Proskow’s Marxist-Leninist slant on American politics) by longing for a Daniel Andrews style lockdown in Canada.

How many of the Canadian sheeple baaaaed appreciatively at Dawna Friesen’s departing pronouncement remains to be seen.

. . .


The Inca vampiress Huchuysisa (on vacation in the Bahamas) was happy she managed to evade capture and being sacrificed by the demons Baal and Baphomet again in order that Moloch’s most devoted disciple on the U.S. Supreme Court might live.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 25th
2020.

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Pan Goatee’s Ongoing Aesthetic Crusade and Hillary’s Nightmare

September 24, 2020 at 10:32 pm (Aesthetics, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee had gone to a nearby grocery store to buy himself some Mango and Guava juice (to start the new autumn season by eating and drinking healthy).

Pan Goatee’s serial killing specialty was to kill ugly looking women (or as he called them “female facially aesthetically challenged” so as not to be so politically offensive in an age of extreme political correctness where people are so easily offended about everything).

As Goatee returned from the grocery store and walked across the street to his home, he noticed a fat ugly blimp walking her dog (a dog of the four legged variety as opposed to the two legged variety).

The fat ugly blimp’s dog took a shit on the lawn of the house where Pan Goatee rented a room.

“Leaping toadstools!” Goatee exclaimed, “You walk around with your fat ugly face ruining the aesthetic environment of an early autumn evening and then your dog takes a shit on my lawn? Why don’t you potty train him to take a shit on your face? At least that way it would be a huge improvement.”

Goatee then beheaded the fat ugly blimp with his astral laser machete.

He beheaded the dog as well for crapping on his lawn.

Nanites from Hell arrived to eat the remains of the fat ugly blimp and her crapping dog.

After Goatee had put his Mango and Guava juice away, he was so angry about the encounter with the fat ugly blimp and her crapping dog, he decided to go for a long walk hoping that seeing the autumn colours of the trees would improve his mood.

But the colours of the trees had not changed colour yet.

It must be all the hot air flowing from City Hall these days as the city’s fat chubby Mayor (who lucky for him was male otherwise his political career might have come to an abrupt and sudden end when Goatee moved into the city) and his brainless city councillors and even more brainless bureaucrats didn’t seem to know how to run a city, Goatee fumed.

The hot air from City Hall was preventing the leaves on the trees from changing colour.

Goatee decided to turn around and head home.

His mood even more sour than ever.

Then lo and behold! his mood worsened when an even fatter and uglier fat ugly blimp than the one he encountered earlier in the evening was walking down the street right at him.

“What’s with you uglos?” Goatee noted as he beheaded her, “This must be part of a George Soros funded plot to lower the morale of what used to be western civilization and pave the way for a global Communist revolution. They’ve even got fat ugly blimps doing TV ads for the Big Spin Wheel Lottery whereas in the past they used to have beautiful women doing it. This Great Reset as Soros and the UN call it is off to a piss poor start in my opinion. And my lawn if it could talk would say it’s off to a crappy start!”.

. . .

“Unholy Mother of Beelzebub!” Hillary Clinton woke up screaming, “I had a nightmare where I dreamed I was being beheaded by a genetically created satyr hot off the test tubes and hot off the pages of classical Greek mythology and he was speaking hilariously funny Oscar Wilde style witticisms as he beheaded me.”

“I had the same nightmare!” Bill said as he woke up with a huge smile on his face.

“Have you been sleep writing phone numbers again?” Hillary grabbed the pen and paper away from the former Fornicator-In-Chief.

Hillary became enraged, “Why did you write down Monica Lewinsky’s phone number?”.

“Did I write down Monica Lewinsky’s phone number?” Bill blushed, “I meant to write down Ariana Grande’s. I imagine Monica is quite old by now. And I really enjoyed ogling Ariana Grande’s ass along with the Rev. Jesse Jackson at Aretha Franklin’s funeral two years ago. I was wanting to have Ariana perform with me a duet version of that old Dolly Parton song Here You Come Again.”

Hillary hit Bill over the head with a cactus plant.

. . .

Pope Francis looked at the shooter style mean looking alcohol concoction in his gay papal secretary’s shooter glass.

“What’s that drink called?” The Communist pontiff inquired.

“It’s called a Cthulhu,” his secretary answered.

“A what?” Francis looked confused.

“A Cthulhu,” the secretary replied, “named after a fictional monster created by the American horror writer H.P. Lovecraft.”

“What does it taste like?” Francis asked.

“I guess I’m about to find out,” the secretary smiled and downed the shooter.

He immediately disintegrated.

Both flesh and bones (most of his bones anyways).

Only his skull remained.

“I don’t think I shall ever order one of those,” Francis remarked as he rang his bell to ask his valet to bring him a new secretary.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday September 24th
2020.

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Renfield R. Renfield vs. Australia’s Victoria State Dictator Daniel Andrews

September 23, 2020 at 9:52 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Australia’s Victoria state had just granted the police in that state the power to arrest people who write and also post “conspiracy theories on social media”.

British MP Renfield R. Renfield had recently described Daniels as “a jackass who has really let power get to his braying head”.

Andrews was getting sick of Renfield making fun of him (just like Hitler got sick of Churchill making fun of him).

He was also angry at Renfield for getting an invisible 6 foot 8 tall bunny rabbit to inject a serum in his buttocks which gave him an excruciatingly painful case of hemorrhoids.

So under this new law, Andrews thought this entitled him to arrest people beyond the borders of Victoria state.

Even beyond the borders of Australia itself.

As such, he sent a bunch of Melbourne police commandos to Britain to arrest Renfield.

The Melbourne police commandos made a colossal blundering error when they tried to arrest Renfield at the estate mansion of the London-based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set.

Set’s estate guard cat Nefertiti Galore set upon the Melbourne police commandos and ripped them to shreds with her claws.

The pieces of the commandos were gathered up by the Set Estate’s live action garden gnomes and placed in a wastepaper basket.

Renfield had the wastepaper basket with the pieces of the commandos inside couriered back to Melbourne, Australia addressed to:
Victoria’s State Dictator Daniel Andrews, Melbourne, Australia.

Inside Renfield had left a personal note for Andrews,

“Your Melbourne police commandos aren’t so tough as they were done in by a London pussy. This really doesn’t say much for them or for you.”

He signed it,

“Yours respectfuly,
Renfield R. Renfield.”

. . .

Meanwhile at Melbourne Police Headquarters in the Australian Victoria state capital, the ghosts of the Nazi SS’s Heinrich Himmler and the Soviet NKVD’s Laventriy Beria had been granted a temporary dispensational release from their rotating barbeque spits down in Tartarus at Victoria state dictator Daniel Andrews’ request (he had to bribe Hades with a koala bear fur skin rug as the chthonic deity did not have one of those fur skin rugs in his collection) in order to give Melbourne police some great tips on how to violate civil rights and human rights and how to impose a martial law lockdown in the state in the most brutal manner possible.

Himmler’s ghost and Beria’s ghost had been giving these seminars to the Melbourne Police Department ever since Victoria state dictator Daniel Andrews announced the martial law style lockdown in early August.

. . .

Meanwhile in the U.S., the mainstream Marxist CNN was heaping lavish praise on Victoria state dictator Daniel Andrews and his martial law style lockdown calling it a “model for the U.S.”.

It will certainly become the model for the U.S. if the Biden-Harris ticket wins in November.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday September 23rd
2020.

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Political Incorrectness vs. Moloch Worship

September 21, 2020 at 9:54 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , )

British Prime Minister Boris Johnson was busy shampooing his dog.

It was a difficult thing to do as both he and his dog were wearing face masks as recommended by British government health experts.

The radio was on and the BBC announced that a telephone interview with British MP Renfield R. Renfield was coming up.

Renfield, Johnson reflected as he almost drowned the dog with Johnson’s Baby Shampoo.

Renfield had briefly served in Boris Johnson’s cabinet as Deputy Foreign Secretary In Charge of Geopolitical Intelligence Gathering last year when Johnson led a minority government prior to calling a December election in which he won a majority.

Renfield had negotiated a deal with then Irish Taioseach (Prime Minister) Leo Varadkar on the Irish border question in Brexit.

Many did not want a hard border to return to Ireland between north and south.

Theresa May’s solution to the question was to have an open border in Ireland but her compromise would then make the entire United Kingdom still subject to rules and regulations by the Neo-Stalinist EU bureaucrats in Brussels.

Renfield’s solution was to have an open border in Ireland but have only Northern Ireland subject to Neo-Stalinist regulations from the EU capital in Brussels.

As Renfield told Johnson at the time, “3 out of 4 parts of the United Kingdom not subject to Neo-Stalinist bureaucratic regulations from Brussels ain’t bad.”

So the Renfield Protocol on the Irish border question was adopted in the Brexit deal.

Now Johnson decided to bring in legislation unilaterally doing away with the Renfield Protocol in Brexit- a move that even one of Johnson’s own cabinet ministers described as breaking international law since it had been signed as part of an internationally agreed to treaty.

Johnson’s move had even ticked off George Clooney’s wife Amal Clooney who promptly resigned as the United Kingdom’s envoy on Press Freedom since as a lawyer and barrister, she felt she could not represent a government that broke international law.

The Internal Market Bill was the name of Johnson’s proposed legislation that would override the Renfield Protocol in the Brexit Agreement.

Back in January, Johnson had Renfield removed from the Cobra Committee (the UK government committee that oversaw any national emergency) because he felt Renfield was too much of an independent thinker who refused to tow the line when it came to Groupthink.

The Cobra Committee would be meeting tomorrow to discuss the rise in Covid cases in Britain.

Renfield had recently and rather annoyingly pointed out that at the moment Sweden seemed to be the only country in Europe that wasn’t experiencing a 2nd wave of Covid cases (Sweden was also the only country in Europe not to go into total lockdown and quarantine this spring because Sweden’s chief epidemiologist Dr. Anders Tegnell thought it wasn’t necessary to impose a form of martial law or USSR/Maoist China control over its citizens in order to combat the virus. Something totally at odds with 99% of the world’s governments who were chomping at the bits for a Marxist-Leninist New World Order aka George Soros’ Great Reset to occur).

When the interview started on the radio as Johnson’s dog was busy suffocating under a combination of face mask and Johnson’s Baby Shampoo, Johnson wondered how long it would be before Renfield said something that was politically incorrect.

The interviewer asked Renfield, “What do you think of the epithet The Notorious RBG that many of her admirers gave to the late Ruth Bader Ginsburg?”.

“Well,” Renfield could be heard clanking his whisky glass and sipping his drink as he spoke, “Since Adolf Hitler was always considered a notorious individual in History, it’s only appropriate that Ruth Bader Ginsburg be given the same epithet.”

The radio station’s switchboard then lit up with callers from overseas – angry so-called progressive liberal Democratic voters from the U.S.

. . .

The demon Moloch strolled angrily up and down in front of the U.S. Supreme Court Building in Washington DC.

One of his most ardent disciples on that court had recently died.

Now who was going to replace her?

He text messaged Joe Biden demanding answers.

Senility prone Joe Biden looked at the text message and then asked his marijuana pot smoking desert cactus plant Sweet Dementia, “Moloch, isn’t he the fellow that owns a pizzaria and delicatessen on the corner of Whatchamacallit and WhatTheHellIsThatOtherPlace in downtown Wilmington?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday September 21st
2020.

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Sophia Watches Yaldabaoth’s Attempted Coup Against Mussolini

September 20, 2020 at 10:51 pm (Comedy, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, Humour, International Intrigue, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )


Sophia the Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom heading towards Il Duce’s residence in Rome where her son Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was trying to stage a coup d’etat against Mussolini

The year was 1940.

The month was September.

And Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was in Winston Churchill’s underground bunker in London.

Churchill tried to be an amiable host but he was becoming quite alarmed at the amount of his good brandy that the Irish leprechaun was drinking.

“So Michael Collins told you to look me up whenver you were in London?” Churchill offered Yaldabaoth a cigar in hopes that would momentarily stop his fast moving consumption of brandy for a while as the wee leprechaun smoked it.

Michael Collins had been the first Prime Minister of the Irish Free State and he had been assassinated by anti Anglo-Irish Treaty forces on August 22nd 1922.

During the summer of 1921, Michael Collins had gone to London to negotiate a peace treaty ending the Anglo-Irish War.

His British counterpart in the negotiations had been Winston Churchill.

Collins said to Churchill, “I’ve got a complaint. Your British Army once put a price on my head. £1000 for my capture- dead or alive.”

Churchill feigned mock outrage, “You’ve got a complaint? You’ve got a complaint? Let me show you something to complain about.”

Churchill went and got the old Boer War Wanted poster offering anyone £25 for the capture of Winston Churchill Dead Or Alive.

He showed it to Collins.

Said Churchill, “Now there’s something to complain about. I was only worth £25 while you were worth a 1000.”

Collins had to laugh.

After that exchange, the two men became close friends and negotiated a peace treaty.

The treaty was signed on December 6th 1921.

When Yaldabaoth had finished his cigar after Churchill had recounted his meeting with Michael Collins, the leprechaun reached to pour himself another glass of brandy.

Churchill looked glum and said, “I’m ticked.”

Yaldbaoth quickly withdrew his hand from the bottle.

“Why is that?” The leprechaun asked.

“British Intelligence informs me that Mussolini intends to invade Greece in the very near future,” Churchill poured himself another brandy, “There seems to be no end to that bloodthirsty guttersnipe Hitler and his Italian jackal Mussolini spreading their filth all over the soil of Europe.”

Yaldabaoth apologized for his leprechaunish intrusion and left.

He summoned his pet pterodactyl (the leprechaun had no idea where this pterodactyl came from and didn’t bother to ask) and flew to Rome.

He would overthrow Mussolini in a coup d’etat thnking that this would make Churchill happy.

Yaldabaoth retreated to an Italian taverna where he ordered and drank 999 bottles of Italian red wine.

Feeling sufficiently buoyant as a result of all that wine imbibing, Yaldabaoth then went to Il Duce’s palatial residence, crawled up to the top balcony and then gave a speech in which he asked the populace of Italy to rise up and overthrow Mussolini.

Needless to say, the little leprechaun’s speech created a lot of commotion in the Italian capital.

Word of the booze happy little leprechaun’s coup attempt reached the ears of his mother Sophia the Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom who was currently living in Rome.


Sophia marched herself down to Il Duce’s residence while being followed by a crowd of happy onlookers.

Sophia wanted to get up to the upper balcony of Il Duce’s residence.

A huge group of male volunteers grabbed a ladder and held it as she crawled up to the upper balcony.

The male ladder holders gazed up totally spellbound as Sophia went up the ladder.

Papal excommunications for publicly masturbating on the spot were widespread that day.

Sophia wagged her finger admonishingly at Yaldabaoth, “Yaldabaoth, put an end to this nonsense. You just don’t have the resources to overthrow Il Duce Benito Mussolini.”

“But,” Yaldabaoth protested, “I drank 999 bottles of red wine in the Contento Bacchus Taverna to say nothing of the multitudinous glasses of brandy I had at Churchill’s London bunker which caused the British Prime Minister to declare another wartime emergency upon my leaving. That should be more than enough resources to topple Mussolini.”

“Yaldabaoth,” Sophia warned, “I know you’re almost 2000 years old but that doesn’t mean you’re still too old to spank.”

Yaldaboth continued with his speech.

Whereupon Sophia took Yaldabaoth over her knee and spanked him.

As Sophia went down the ladder carrying the errant leprechaun and his glowing rosy red bottom, a group of male ladder holders at the bottom of the ladder started shouting, “Now spank me”, “Me too” and “Me as well, please”.

At the Potsdam Conference in 1945, a constipated and dour looking Soviet dictator Josef Stalin demanded that the wee Irish leprechaun’s coup attempt against Mussolini be erased from the history books.

And so it was.

Until 80 years to the day later, it is now being told for the first time.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday September 20th
2020.

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Tartarus Bound and The Keys

September 18, 2020 at 10:22 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

As the three headed dog Cerberus led the late U.S. Associate Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg to her rotating barbeque spit over an open fire in Tartarus where she’d be spending her next eternity, three other figures had just been granted a one year dispensational leave from their rotating barbeque spits in Tartarus.

Pope Francis, who had actually lost the Keys of Saint Peter several years ago but didn’t bother relaying that message to Hades the Greek god of the Underworld, had communicated with the cthonic deity to release the three figures.

Bergoglio had communicated with Hades via a Rome based spiritist medium Sophia de Medici.


Sophia de Medici: Who did not feel at all threatened, sexually harrassed or lusted at by the men who worked in Pope Francis’ Vatican.

Later after the three figures arrived in Rome, Pope Francis had a Zoom conference video meeting with powerful figures from around the globe.

Meanwhile British MP Renfield R. Renfield was informing the London based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set that the term “Great Reset” was a globalist code word for establishing a One World Marxist Leninist government.

Earlier this week Dr. Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus the Ethiopian Communist who headed WHO (the World Health Organization) said that the current crisis would not end “with a vaccine but only with a total reorganization of society. We can never go back to the way things were before.”

Renfeld told Set: “That’s globalist code for freedom is permanently dead.”

The Sodom and Gomorrah admiring Italian-American physician Dr. Anthony Fauci (medical darling of the mainstream Marxist media) also talked about the need for combating climate change and for redistributing the world’s wealth (although by that he didn’t mean his own personal wealth would be available for redistribution- notation by Renfield).

Flaky Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi blamed both the CCP Wuhan virus and the California wildfires on climate change.

“Mother Earth is mad at us!” Said the San Francisco Congresswoman while sporting a Medusa serpentine hairdo.

Likewise conceited, pompous and arrogant California Gov. Gavin Newsom blamed the California wildfires on climate change.

Just as the latest California wildfire was being started by fireworks going off at a gender reveal party in the woods.

Certainly one fiery revelation to say the least!

At the Davos Forum in Switzerland earlier this year, George Soros told participants that this year must mark the start of the “Great Reset”.

Now George Soros, Bill Gates, American economist Jeffrey Sachs and U-2 singer Bono were in a Zoom video conference with Pope Francis.

“Gentlemen,” Pope Francis held his hammer and sickle crucifix given him as a gift by Evo Morales the former Marxist President of Bolivia, “I have asked Hades to release three spirits from Tartarus for an entire year to help us as we launch the Great Reset.”

The ghosts of Lenin, Stalin and Mao Tse-tung stepped forward into the room where the Unholy Father was addressing his fellow Zoom conference participants.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 18th
2020.

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Dr. Marmalade Montague Examines Set Enterprises Intelligence Network

September 17, 2020 at 10:49 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Dr. Marmalade Montague (who wasn’t really a doctor) was a Paris baker who had a mental breakdown after his Paris bakery closed permanently (due to inability to pay rent) during the spring lockdown in Paris, France earlier this year.

After his breakdown, Dr. Marmalade Montague imagined that he was the Court Scientist to the Court of Louis Quatorze who had become trapped in a time warp and was taken from France’s Sun King epoch to this year of 2020.

Montague flew to England from France in a hot air balloon (that was powered by an old gramophone on which played a record disc that had on it The Collected Speeches of French President Emmanuel Macron).

Montague showed up at the Set Enterprises Laboratory and Persian Rug Warehouse (which was one and the same building) in London.

Set Enterprises’ chief scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher took pity on him and gave him a job.

Today Dr. Marmalade Montague sat in his office and watched on his computer things that were happening with the Set Enterprises Intelligence Unit since he had somehow inadvertently managed to download the Set Enterprises Intelligence Unit App (which was actually harder to download than the CIA, FBI, Homeland Security, MI-5, MI-6, FSB, GRU and Chinese Ministry of State Security apps) to his computer.

In the Set Enterprises daycare centre meanwhile, a 3-year-old child had downloaded the ASIO (Australian Security Intelligence Organization) app
as had 3-year-old children in daycare centres across the planet.

Dr. Montague watched a Skype conversation between the vampiress Mei-ling Manchu (who was a Renfieldian double agent in the Chinese Ministry of State Security) and British MP Renfield R. Renfield (who prior to his election to Parliament in June 2017 had been Chief of Intelligence Gathering and Security Operations For Set Enterprises).

“So, Rennie,” Mei-ling addressed the Churchillian Transhumanist Member of Parliament, “you’ve undoubtedly heard by now that a CCP (Chinese Communist Party) front the San Francisco-based Chinese Progressive Association has been providing funding for BLM inspired rioting across the U.S.”.

“Yes, I’ve heard that,” Renfield had taken apart his egg roll to see if there were any wiretaps in it and finding none had put sweet and sour orange sauce over it and ate it, “so this is further confirmation that the CCP has been financing the ongoing anarcho-Marxist thug and hooligan riots (what the mainstream Marxist media in the U.S. call “peaceful protests”) that have been taking place in America all summer with the approval of numerous U.S. Democratic Party mayors and governors.”

“Yes, the CCP definitely wants to see the Biden/Harris ticket win in November,” Mei-ling sipped a glass of red wine.

“Another thing they have in common with the mainstream Marxist media,” Renfield started examining his Peking Duck for signs of a wiretap inside.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday September 17th
2020.


Vampiress Mei-ling Manchu relaxes with candlelight and music.

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