Dulcinea Lucia and The Vampiric Knights-Templar

September 17, 2017 at 11:34 pm (Detective story, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Dulcinea Lucia and The Vampiric Knights-Templar

Once Private Eyes 👀 Agathor Christie and Magog Rhys Petley decided to take the case for Allatallahbel the Vampiress Priestess of Baal and search for the 13 Vampiric Knights-Templar who survived French King 👑 Philip the Fair’s Friday October 13th 1307 raid on Jacques de Molay and his fellow Knights-Templars, they started where most Private Eyes would when confronted with such a case.

They went to see a gypsy fortune 🔮 teller.

And a young beautiful and sexy one at that.

Dulcinea Lucia the gypsy fortune teller of London’s Carnaby Street.

When they entered her shop, they discovered she was dressed like Elvira the popular American horror movie show hostess of the 1980s- a black evening dress slit at the sides from thigh to ankle, black silk pantyhose and black spiked stiletto high heeled shoes.

This would thus be an interview both men would enjoy.

Dulcinea Lucia told Agathor and Magog that the 13 Knights had managed to escape King Philip’s Friday the 13th raid by being in a Paris brothel at the time.

When informed of the raid, the 13 knights went south to the village of Rennes-le-Chateau in the Languedoc region of southern France 🇫🇷.

“Any idea, why there?” Agathor asked.

“One of Jesus’ cousins is buried in a grave there,” Dulcinea Lucia answered.

“The Jesus?” The Marxist atheist former Labour MP Magog raised an eyebrow.

“Yes,” Dulcinea Lucia answered.

“How did they become vampires?” Agathor asked.

“The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith was in the village of Rennes-le-Chateau at the time,” Dulcinea Lucia answered, “she bit each man on the neck and turned them into vampires on the evening of October 23rd 1307 – 10 days after Philip the Fair’s Friday the 13th October raid on all the lodges and temples of the Knights-Templar in France.”

“And have those 13 Vampiric Knights-Templar survived since then?” Magog queried.

“7 of them were slain inside the Episcopalian Cathedral of St. John The Divine in New York City on Friday October the 13th 2006 while attending a Meatloaf concert being held at the central altar of the cathedral,” Dulcinea Lucia answered.

“The Meat Loaf?” Agathor asked.

“Yes,” Dulcinea Lucia nodded, “the one who sang Bat 🦇 Out of Hell, Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad, I’d Do Anything For Love and Rock And Roll 🎸 Dreams Come Through.”

“And they had a Meat Loaf concert right at the central altar?” Asked Magog who had visited the Episcopal Cathedral of Saint John The Divine in New York City with Agathor on their recent U.S. trip where they had encountered Shiva the Hindu god of destruction and transformation at that very same central altar.

“It was more of a Knights-Templar Illuminati satanic ceremony where they were going to sacrifice Meat Loaf to the Baphomet because Baphomet wanted both a singer and a meatloaf dish for his birthday so the Illuminati and the Knights-Templar were going to give him a 2 for 1 special,” Dulcinea Lucia opened her book of meatloaf recipes.

“And you said that 7 of the Vampiric Knights Templar were slain at that Friday the 13th October 2006 Meatloaf sacrifice ceremony in the Episcopal Cathedral of Saint John The Divine?” Agathor questioned.

“Yes, the 7 who attended the ceremony,” Dulcinea smoothed her dress, “the other 6 were still in their New York City 🌃 hotel rooms recovering from severe hangovers the night before- hangovers that saved their lives in the long run.”

“Who slew the 7 Vampire Knights that attended the ceremony?” Agathor asked.

“That was Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing and the mighty Lakota Sioux vampire huntress Jennifer Cochran,” Dulcinea Lucia smiled, “both of them were Meat Loaf fans.”

“Of the singer or the dish?” Magog inquired.

“Both,” Dulcinea Lucia smiled and winked.

A bell went off in the kitchen behind her gypsy 🔮 ball reading room.

“If you’ll excuse me, gentlemen,” Dulcinea Lucia stood up, “my own meatloaf is ready. Unless you care to join me.”

They did.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday September 17th
2017.

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Vampiress Priestess of Baal Hires Two London Private Eyes

September 13, 2017 at 6:52 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mystery/horror, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Vampiress Priestess of Baal Hires Two London Private Eyes

Agathor Christie and Magog Rhys Petley were both sitting in their newly opened London office.

Agathor Christie had been the sitting incumbent British Conservative MP for the constituency of Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds until he got defeated by British Transhumanist Party candidate Renfield R. Renfield in this past June’s UK 🇬🇧 General Election.

Magog Rhys Petley had been been the sitting incumbent British Labour MP for the constituency of Newbridge in Wales until he got defeated by British Transhumanist Party candidate Morgana Fay Lee in this past June’s UK 🇬🇧 General Election.

Since both men (although from different parties) had lost their respective parliamentary seats to candidates for the up and coming British Transhumanist Party, they decided to take a post-defeat consolation tour of the U.S. together.

Now back in London, both men decided to open up a private detective firm together since it turned out that, as children, both had loved reading Raymond Chandler’s Philip Marlowe private eye novels and stories.

After officially opening the office and helping themselves to both bourbon 🥃 and cigars, they sat back in their respective comfortable leather upholstered mahogany armchairs and waited for their first client to walk through the door.

The story on BBC World News they watched on the office television was about a Kraken rising out of Lake Okanagan in British Columbia’s Okanagan Valley and walking through a grape 🍇 and wine 🍷 orchard near the city of West Kelowna and eating grapes 🍇 and drinking bottles of wine.

It then grabbed a statue of the Virgin Mary as Our Lady of Lourdes from the orchard gardens and took the statue with him back into the lake.

The vineyard owner speculated that the Kraken might be the lake’s famed sea serpent lake monster Ogopogo who was said to have haunted the lake for centuries.

“Certainly a lot of krakens rising up all over the place these days,” Agathor quipped.

“There are,” Magog quickly downed his glass of bourbon, “nasty business that.”

“I wonder if some beautiful woman femme fatale will walk in through the door wearing a tight fitting dress like always happens in Philip Marlowe stories?” Agathor asked as he polished off his glass of bourbon.

“I wonder,” Magog re-filled his glass.

At that moment, a beautiful dark haired and dark eyed woman wearing a tight fitting Phoenician purple evening dress and a diamond 💎 necklace with the diamonds cut into the shape of human skulls around her neck walked into their office with the sharp click of spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes 👠.

“I am the Vampiress Allatallahbel the Priestess of Baal,” said the incredibly sexy and beautiful female figure standing in front of them, “I’m here to hire you to find the last of the band of 13 Vampiric Knights-Templar -13 individuals who were the sole escaping survivors of French King Philip the Fair’s Friday October 13th 1307 raid on Jacques de Molay and his fellow Knights-Templar.”

“Well that answers the question you asked a few minutes ago,” Magog addressed Agathor as he finished yet another glass of bourbon.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday September 13th
2017.

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Osiris Meets Yemaya In Rome

September 12, 2017 at 3:42 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , )

The Egyptian vampire Osiris was walking the streets of Rome where he lived.

His wife and sister Isis still lived in Paris.

A family reunion between the pair from a few years back didn’t go so well as planned so the two were now living separately.

As for his evil brother and brother-in-law Set, he was a multi-billionaire and living in London.

And one of Set’s former employees Renfield R. Renfield was now being touted as the next Prime Minister of Great Britain- which really didn’t bode well for the state of the world.

Osiris had received a call from Pope Francis this morning (while Osiris was asleep in his sarcophagus) asking if he’d call a press conference and condemn Donald Trump for not believing in climate change.

The Egyptian deity said he’d get back to Francis on that.

But now it was evening. The sun was down and Osiris was free to walk the streets.

As Osiris walked down the street, a peacock strutted by.

“Wow, peacocks really are proud,” Osiris said to himself.

Then a vulture flew by.

“Wow, that’s not a very promising sign,” Osiris thought, “rather ominous in fact.”

He stopped in front of a fountain filled with algae and all sorts of flowers and plants around the fountain.

The fountain sprayed Osiris and Osiris felt the taste of salt water rather than fresh water which was unusual for a fountain in Rome.

Then a face arose from the waters.
Yemaya

“Who are you?” Osiris asked.

“I am Yemaya the goddess of the seas and oceans,” replied the figure.

Osiris had recalled reading somewhere that an orisha (divine spirit) was the goddess of the ocean and seas in the Afro-Caribbean Yoruba religion as well as Haitian vodou, Louisiana voodoo and Santeria.

“What do you want with me?” Osiris asked.

“You should know, Osiris, husband of Isis the Egyptian goddess and divine queen of the seas, that krakens are rising everywhere,” Yemaya stated, “arising in both fresh and salt water.”

From Yemaya’s tone of voice, Osiris gathered that krakens arising was obviously a major problem to be concerned about.

Meanwhile on Mount Olympus, Zeus was muttering in his sleep, “Release the Kraken. Release the Kraken.”

Athena said to Hermes, “He is speaking in the singular and not the plural, isn’t he?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday September 12th
2017.

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Waterton Lakes, Wind and Fire

September 11, 2017 at 4:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Horror, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , )

Waterton Lakes, Wind 💨 and Fire 🔥

Waterton Lakes, Wind and Fire 🔥

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith had been regarded as a storm goddess in the nations of the ancient Middle East.

When U. S. President George W. Bush in his first inaugural address asked, “Do you not think an angel rides in the whirlwind and directs this storm?” he was referring to Lilith.

Iraqi President Saddam Hussein had recently pissed Lilith off and so had to go.

Attacks on the Twin Towers in New York would ensure an eventual U.S. invasion of Iraq and the toppling of Saddam.

Now Lilith was hoping to raise an ancient ally in North America.

A kraken at the bottom of Upper Waterton Lake in Waterton Lakes National Park in southern Alberta on the Alberta-Montana Canada-U.S. border.

The kraken’s name was Tutsokiua and had been asleep at the bottom of Upper Waterton Lake for 5000 years.

One of the ways of raising Tutsokiua was having a wildfire reach the lake where he resided.

Lilith had already caused a wildfire to burn down the Sperry Chalet in nearby Glacier National Park in Montana.

Glacier National Park had been the site of a U.S. House of Episcopalian Bishops meeting back in the mid-1960s which considered having a heresy trial for Episcopal Bishop James Albert Pike one of her most ardent and committed supporters.

The House of Bishops decided not to go through with the heresy trial but Lilith still decided to get revenge some day anyways.

It was in the dining room of the Sperry Chalet that a group of anti-Pike Anglo-Catholic Episcopal Bishops plotted their strategy.

Lilith after seducing Zeus swiped one of his lightning ⛈ bolts ⚡️ and ignited the Sprague Fire 🔥 by lightning on August 10th.

The fire spread and burnt down the Sperry Chalet (opened in 1914 by the Great Northern Railway) on August 31st.

The Kenow wildfire was Lilith’s weapon to raise the kraken Tutsokiua from the depths of Upper Waterton Lake.

After seducing Zeus again (Zeus was such an easy target 🎯 for her sultry sexy seductive charms), she swiped another lightning ⛈ bolt ⚡️ and started the Kenow wildfire back on September 1st with a lightning strike in the Flathead Valley just across the border from the national park in the province of British Columbia.

The fire 🔥 was spreading through the Akamina Valley and was expected to cross the Alberta-B.C. border into the Cameron Valley in Alberta’s Waterton Lakes National Park today.

Lilith who was riding in the wind 💨 behind this storm (but former U.S. President George W. Bush was too busy being a spectator at NFL Football 🏈 games to notice this time) was hoping to drive the fire towards the Prince of Wales Hotel on Upper Waterton Lake by the middle of this week.

The Prince of Wales Hotel opened in 1927 having been built by the U.S. Great Northern Railway to lure American tourists during the Prohibition era.

The hotel was named after the Prince of Wales (the future King Edward VIII) in a transparent attempt to entice him to stay in the hotel on his 1927 Canadian tour but the prince stayed at a nearby ranch instead.

Lilith felt that if the 90-year-old hotel burnt to the ground that this would generate sufficient atmospheric chaos to cause the kraken Tutsokiua to arise from his sleep 😴 at the bottom of Upper Waterton Lake.

Then burning the Prince of Wales Hotel (named after the obnoxious future King Edward VIII) to the ground would be another act of personal revenge on Lilith’s part.

Years ago when she was at a formal dinner and dance 💃🏻 in England back in the 1930s, she was expecting the Prince of Wales to ask her to dance but instead he asked that floozy Mrs. Wallis Simpson.

Hell definitely has no fury like a Lilith scorned.

As for her ardent supporter and admirer the late Episcopal bishop James Albert Pike, he was now a confirmed believer in the existence of Hell (a doctrine that he denied during his earthly lifetime).

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday September 11th
2017.

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A Kraken Rises As A Curtain Goes Down

September 9, 2017 at 6:59 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Horror, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

A Kraken Rises As A Curtain Goes Down

There are krakens and then there are krakens.

For example there is the Kraken who calls himself Napoleon VI.

In his mortal life, he had been Italian mad scientist Dr. Poseidon Prometheus dying from a fatal disease so he had uploaded his consciousness into the body of a cyborg octopus 🐙- part machine and part living octopus 🐙 (given a special serum of Kraken immortality that had been developed by Dr. Poseidon Prometheus’ British mad scientist friend Dr. Cadbury Rocher who had in his possession in a secret aquarium the Greek god Zeus’ own personal Kraken who is released into the world’s oceans 🌊 whenever Zeus shouts “Release the Kraken!”).

Prior to uploading his consciousness into the cyborg octopus body, Dr. Poseidon Prometheus had also placed a portion of the brain of the original French Emperor Napoleon I (that he had in his possession) into the octopus’ brain.

Dr. Poseidon Prometheus had been a big admirer of both Emperor Napoleon I and Emperor Napoleon III so wanted a piece of Napoleonic brain before venturing forth into cyborg octopus immortality.

Shortly after he became a Kraken, Napoleon VI (as he now called himself) had met and fell in love 😍 with the ex-Gorgon Medusa whom Dr. Cadbury Rocher had recently revived from the dead having reunited her original head and her original body. Medusa had been restored to her original beauty after Dr. Cadbury Rocher’s robotic barber (that he called Edward Scissorhands II) had given the Gorgon’s snake 🐍 ridden hairstyle 💁 a thorough cut and chopping.

Edward Scissorhands II had then applied a natural hair growth formula (that Dr. Cadbury Rocher had developed) to Medusa’s scalp and the now ex-Gorgon’s natural human hair grew back.

Napoleon VI had himself crowned Emperor of France 🇫🇷 as the Emperor Napoleon VI in Paris’ Notre Dame Cathedral a couple of years ago with the papal blessing of Pope Francis for the coronation ceremony.

However the one hitch turned out to be that no one in France itself recognized the coronation.

To correct the situation, Napoleon VI and Medusa had started their own political party 🎉 in France the Aquarian Age Bonapartist Party earlier this year.

The two member party 🎉 then nominated Napoleon VI as the Aquarian Age Bonapartist Party candidate for President of France.

The plan was that when Napoleon VI was elected President of France, he’d then call a referendum asking the French people to elect him Emperor of the French.

But alas the best laid plans of Kraken and ex-Gorgon, they often go astray.

Napoleon VI wound up in 12th and last place of the 12 Presidential candidates running in the 1st round French Presidential election.

The heavy make-up wearing Emmanuel Macron then won the Presidency of France in the subsequent run-off election- a decision which the citizens of France 🇫🇷 had now come to regret.

They would have been better to choose calamari with their cheese 🧀 rather than a piece of rouge wearing white chocolate 🍫 macron.

Meanwhile over in the Caribbean, the North Korean ship The Red Scorpion 🦂 was transmitting a satellite broadcast of North Korean despot Kim Jong-un reciting aloud passages from a medieval Korean copy of The Necronomicon.

The Red Scorpion had entered the Caribbean on August 17th and had begun broadcasting aloud the Kim Jong-un oral readings from The Necronomicon (Medieval Korean edition) the same day that a then Tropical Storm ⛈ called Harvey had formed.

That day a Kraken called Uhluhtc had risen from the bottom of the Caribbean Sea 🌊 following Kim Jong-un’s readings from The Necronomicon.

Uhlucth’s thrashings had led to Harvey forming and then Irma forming and then Jose forming and then Katia forming.

And those were only from Uhlucth thrashing at the bottom of the sea.

Only the gods knew what storms would form as Uhlucth made his way to the top.

Meanwhile in Paris, the curtain came down after 30 seconds as Napoleon VI auditioned for the role of the Phantom in a Paris production of The Phantom of The Opera with the director screaming “Next!”.

Aboard the Red Scorpion, Captain Dragon Sun the ship’s head officer was watching the 1942 horror film The Cat People on his television when his phone went off.

Another Necronomicon satellite transmission from Pyongyang was coming through.

“Next!” The captain shouted to his ship’s communications officer.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 8th
2017.

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Recep Tayyip Erdogan and The Vampiress Priestess of Baal

September 2, 2017 at 3:17 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , )

Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan was pacing the halls of his Presidential Palace.

Back in April, the Turkish leader had sent His Majesty King Abdullah II of Jordan a letter demanding that custodianship of the Haram al-Sharif and all Islamic holy sites in Jerusalem be transferred to him Recep Tayyip Erdogan when he the said Recep became the new Sultan of a revived Ottoman Empire.

And of all the audacious things in the world, King Abdullah II of Jordan had still not bothered to answer him back and it was now September.

The man should really be beheaded, Recep thought to himself as he cut a head of lettuce in two with a meat cleaver.

“Good evening, your Majesty,” a sensuous feminine voice spoke behind him.

Recep turned.

Standing there was a beautiful dark-haired dark skinned and dark eyed woman wearing a purple evening dress.

Around her neck was a diamond necklace.

The diamonds were cut in the shape and form of human skulls.

“Well, I’m not the Sultan just yet,” Recep blushed, “Ummm… who are you by the way?”.

“I am the Vampiress Allatallahbel the Priestess of Baal,” she approached him.

“Baal?” Recep scratched his head, “Wasn’t he an ancient Canaanite deity?”.

“He was,” Allatallahbel stood inches away from his throat.

“Ummm… what do you want with me?” Recep asked.

“I’m here to help make you…” she smiled and showed her large vampiric incisors.

“To help make me…?” Recep was starting to feel visibly uncomfortable.

“Sultan,” she smiled at him.

“Oh, Sultan,” he laughed and adjusted his collar, “of course.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday September 2nd
2017.

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The New Nazi-Russian Pact

August 23, 2017 at 7:50 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

The New Nazi-Russian Pact

At the suggestion of the grey wolf formerly known as Adolf, Lilith asked the Norse god Thor to go to Hades for her and request the release of Rasputin’s spirit from the Underworld to go up to Russia and again create havoc like he had done for the Czarist government in the previous century.

Rasputin’s spirit promptly entered the body of a Russian Eurasian brown bear and possessed it.

The grey wolf possessed by the spirit of Adolf Hitler and the Russian Eurasian brown bear possessed by the spirit of Grigori Rasputin then signed a treaty today agreeing to someday mutually attack a certain country in the Middle East.

The treaty was signed aboard a Jules Verne visualized helicopter airship that bore the name Albatross II and was owned by the mysterious enigmatic individual known as Robur The Conquerer II.

The witnesses to the treaty were the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith, the little green frog Nimrod and the cigarette smoking demon Asmodeus.

The treaty was signed on this the 78th Anniversary of the original Nazi-Soviet Pact.

. . .

Hillary Clinton sat at the table drinking her glass of lemonade.

She was angry about what a Fox News commentator said about her this morning.

The Fox News commentator had said that she had lost her marbles.

Imagine that, Hillary harrumphed.

She, Hillary Clinton, had lost her marbles.

Sheesh.

What would they say next?

Hillary looked at her guest sitting across the table from her- Dr. Harvey Nash the world’s greatest bunny rabbit mathematician- 6 ft. 6 in height, pinkish coloured fur, jade green eyes wearing an extremely large pair of spectacles 👓 on his pinkish bunny rabbit nose and whiskers and who, when he spoke, had a voice that sounded a lot like the late Hollywood actor Jimmy Stewart.

Hillary had recently started seeing Dr. Harvey Nash the world’s greatest bunny rabbit mathematician and had hired him to mathematically examine the tweets of Donald Trump to see if Trump was sending coded messages to Russian President Vladimir Putin through his tweets.

She had informed the editorial boards of The Washington Post and The New York Times about Dr. Harvey Nash’s assignment and they told her that they eagerly awaited the results of the investigation with editors from both papers sincerely saying maybe Dr. Nash’s inquiries should be the subject of a Congressional inquiry.

To be fair, she had also contacted Fox News about bunny rabbit mathematician Dr. Harvey Nash’s investigation.

But she never heard back from them.

The only thing she got was some nasty Fox News commentator saying that she Hillary had lost her marbles.

“Would you like another glass of lemonade, dear?” Bill called from the kitchen.

“No thanks,” Hillary said.

“But you had originally asked for 2 glasses of lemonade,” Bill pointed out.

“Well,” said Hillary, “I was originally wanting a glass for our guest but you didn’t bring him one.”

“What guest would that be, dear?” Bill asked.

Hillary shook her head and smiled at Dr. Harvey Nash the world’s greatest bunny mathematician as he mathematically found a coded message to President Putin in a single 3-letter tweet of Trump that said, WTF?.

“I think Bill is the one losing his marbles around here,” Hillary laughed.

“So no second glass of lemonade then, dear?” Bill asked again.

“No, but do bring some carrots 🥕,” Hillary said when she noticed how famished Dr. Harvey Nash looked.

“Did you say carrots?” Bill’s voice sounded quizzical from the kitchen.

“Yes, I said carrots,” Hillary sounded exasperated, “and really big ones too.”

“Chelsea,” Bill’s voice rang out, “will you go dig some carrots out of the garden? I’ve eaten carrots but I’ve never dug.”

“The carrots will be along shortly,” Hillary smiled at Dr. Harvey Nash the world’s greatest bunny rabbit mathematician.

. . .

Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan was modelling the robes he would wear when he proclaimed himself the new Sultan of the revived Ottoman Empire (after he had held a national referendum rigged in his favour of course).

The designer of the robes was none other than the great Milan fashion designer 👩‍🎨 Fabius Faberge.

Erdogan had hired Fabius Faberge to design his Ottoman Sultan robes on the recommendation of British singer Sir Elton John.

“How do they look?” Erdogan asked Fabius Faberge as the Turkish leader twirled around in his robes.

“Fabulous,” Fabius Faberge answered.

August 23rd 2017 was indeed an inauspicious beginning to future geopolitical events on the world stage.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday August 23rd
2017.

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Lilith Takes The Crown

August 22, 2017 at 7:10 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Lilith Takes The Crown

Lilith was being crowned Queen of the Universe at a ceremony in a chapel at the Vatican in Rome.

The cardinal doing the crowning was the Zeus and Apollo worshipping Cardinal JM (JM stood for his secret society moniker Judas Manasseh).

He was assisted in this by his secretary Father Oliver Thomas Wardenclyffe.

The ancient Babylonian vampiress was wearing a beautiful scarlet red evening dress as she was being crowned.

Also present at the ceremony was Nimrod a little green frog.

Nimrod was supposed to be in charge of carrying the flowers for the ceremony but, being a frog, he ate them instead.

As Nimrod was busy hiccoughing rose petals from his mouth, the demon Asmodeus was busy filling up the chapel with his cigarette smoke from his irritatingly bad cigarette smoking habit.

His demonic acquaintances tried to talk him into wearing a nicotine patch which he did but it didn’t seem to work for him.

Coughing on Asmodeus’ cigarette smoke was the grey wolf formerly known as Adolf (a grey wolf whose body had been possessed by the spirit of Adolf Hitler after it had been granted permission by Hades and Persephone to leave the Underworld and wander the Earth for awhile at the Germanic god Wotan’s request which he asked of the Greek chthonic deities through his emissary Thor).

Adolf hadn’t liked cigarette smoke in his previous life and didn’t think much of it in this one either.

But seeing as how he was no longer the Fuhrer of Germany, he could no longer order that Asmodeus be shot by firing squad.

Not that demons were prone to death by firing squad anyways.

When the ceremony was over, they walked outside to enjoy the sunset over Rome.

The grey wolf formerly known as Adolf then started howling that he had an idea on how to cause trouble for Russia.

Since no one in the party understood lupine, they ignored the grey wolf’s howling.

The psychic seer Cassandra Sibylline walked by and she could understand the lupine language.

She said, “The wolf is saying that if you want to destabilize Russia, then go to Hades and Persephone and request that the spirit of Grigori Rasputin be allowed to leave the Underworld and return to Russia for a while.”

A party strategist for the U.S. Democratic National Committee (DNC) walked by and thought that was an excellent suggestion.

He would report back to Hillary Clinton with that suggestion since she was still wanting revenge against Russia for costing her (in her opinion) the last U.S. Presidential election.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday August 22nd
2017.

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The Entity/Being In The Painting/From The Painting

August 21, 2017 at 3:33 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Romance, Science-Fiction, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

The great South African artist SAREJESS looked at some of the paintings he had painted the past couple of months.

Paintings based on dreams and visions he had had.

A grandfather clock with pendulum surrounded with ancient Egyptian markings.

A large hourglass filled with sand on a sandy beach that was turned over again by mermaids in the surging tide.

A sundial that was able to operate in the moonlight at night in the courtyard of an ancient Egyptian palace.

A lovely blonde working girl in the Wild West who wore a beautiful vintage railway watch on a chain worn down the cleft between her magnificent pair of knockers in a low-cut blouse.

A cuckoo clock that had a cuckoo bird bearing the face of Orson Welles as Harry Lime the Thrid Man coming out of it followed by a cuckoo bird bearing the face of an older looking Orson Welles as an ancient Egyptian Pharaoh coming out of it.

A giant hamster standing atop the clock tower of Big Ben.

A ship of the Greek god Hades sailing on the sea that he painted first and later had a dream about.

Another dream with the clock tower of Big Ben sending out a searchlight signal advertising the 1001 positions of the Kama Sutra. Also in the dream and the painting were the TARDIS phone booth from the Dr. Who TV series and the vintage railway watch on a chain down her knockers wearing blonde Serena (now dyed a redhead) wearing a sexy red dress and standing in the snow with two weapons in her hands blasting away at a group of North Korean Army soldiers.

Now last night SAREJESS had another dream.

What he knew was the final dream.

And the final painting of this particular series of paintings.

He painted a picture of an ancient Egyptian wearing white high priestly robes and carrying a scroll in his right hand.

Only this Egyptian high priestly figure had the head of an African sacred ibis bird rather than a human head.

The ibis headed ancient Egyptian figure was followed by a group of baboons.

In the dream, the baboons (following the figure) could talk and were saying prayers of thanksgiving that they were not red spider monkeys.

In the background was Donald Trump shampooing his hair.

SAREJESS recognized the being/entity that he had just painted- the Egyptian high priestly robed figure with a scroll in his hand and the head of an ibis on his head- Thoth.

Thoth the Egyptian god.

Thoth the god of wisdom, writing, counting and medicine.

Thoth the god of magic.

Thoth the scribe and messenger of the gods.

Thoth the creator of hieroglyphs.

The author of Egypt’s sacred laws.

The recorder of the eternal verdict on a deceased person’s heart.

Thoth the god of intelligence, thought, logic and reason.

Thoth the god of the moon.

In fact in many ancient Egyptian paintings, Thoth was often depicted with a lunar disc over his head.

Thoth was known as “The Heart of Ra”, “The Measurer of Time” and “The Master of the Words of God”.

His silver barque transported the souls of the dead across the night sky.

Thoth, to SAREJESS’ amazement, moved in the painting and boarded his silver barque.

Then Thoth walked straight out of the painting carrying the small silver barque (that SAREJESS had just painted) with him.

A blank figure in the painting now stood where Thoth had just walked out.

Thoth then left SAREJESS’ studio carrying the silver barque with him.

“Tim,” his wife Winnie called to him from the kitchen, “who was that very odd looking gentleman who just walked out of your studio? Is he going to buy a painting?”.

“No, dear, I don’t think so,” SAREJESS answered.

Thoth walked down to the beach at Port Elizabeth still carrying the small silver barque with him.

As soon as Thoth put the barque in the salt waters of the Indian Ocean, it grew to life size.

Thoth then boarded the barque and sailed straight up into the sky.

His lunar disc silver barque then sailed but this time it was not the night sky that Thoth transported the souls of the dead across.

It was the day time sky across America from Lincoln City Oregon down to Charleston South Carolina.

And many people saw the ancient Egyptian moon god Thoth’s total eclipse of the sun.

. . .

As Bonnie Tyler stood in front of a statue of the Egyptian sun god Ra singing the song “Total Eclipse of the Heart”, the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set awakened in his sarcophagus in London in a sweat (and he hadn’t been down to the gym in millennia).

He motioned for his valet and butler Athelstan to bring him his Hugh Hefner like red velvet smoking jacket and his pipe.

As he sat there smoking, he said quietly, “Thoth has returned. Now many people will start returning from the dead.”

. . .

Now down at the Set Enterprises’ laboratory, Set’s long dead (since 1924) fiancee Serena opened her eyes.

The Time Traveler’s soul had returned to her earthly body.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday August 21st
2017.

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There’s Grigori and Then There’s Grigori

August 20, 2017 at 7:37 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, Mystery/horror, Science-Fiction, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

There’s Grigori and Then There’s Grigori

The Grigori (a Slav transliteration from the Greek egregoroi meaning “Watchers”, “Those who are awake”, “Those who never sleep”, “guards”, “sentinels”) is a term used in connection with Biblical angels.

They were assigned to watch over the Earth but they fell in love with and mated with mortal women giving rise to a race of hybrids known as the Nephilim who are described as giants.

Their exploits are briefly alluded to in Genesis 6:4 and elaborated upon in the Books of Enoch and Jubilees.

. . .

The Tunguska event was a large explosion 💥 that occurred near the Stony Tunguska River in eastern Siberia on the morning of June 30th 1908.

The explosion flattened over 2000 square kilometres of forest 🌳 yet caused no known human casualties.

The explosion is generally attributed to the air burst of a meteor.

It is classified as an impact event (in fact the largest impact event in recorded history) even though no impact crater has ever been found.

The object is believed to have disintegrated at an altitude of 5 to 10 kilometres above the Earth’s surface rather than actually hitting the surface of the Earth 🌏.

And that portion of the Earth’s surface that experienced the wrath of this mysterious object’s impact was the sparsely populated Eastern Siberian Taiga.

Studies have yielded different estimates of the meteor’s size on the order of 60 to 190 metres (200 to 620 feet) depending on whether the body was a comet or denser asteroid.

Since the 1908 event, there have been an estimated 1000 scholarly papers (mostly in Russian) published on the Tunguska explosion.

Of those 1000 odd papers written on the Tunguska explosion, not one took note of the ripple in time that happened on that day.

Of course, there was no reason why any of them should.

For the effects of the impact were thought to be strictly in the air and on the ground.

There was no reason to expect a rupture (no matter how minuscule) in the space/time continuum.

. . .

Part of that mysterious object that exploded went 11 years back in time to the year 1897 and traveled to the Saint Nicholas Monastery at Verkhoturye (the town that at the foot of relatively low middle Ural Mountains is called the Gateway to Siberia from the west).

Contemporary scientists have often speculated whether primitive alien life forms could be brought to earth on meteorites from space.

The answer is possibly.

What about DNA?

Could DNA travel on a meteorite?

And what about the Grigori? The Watchers of old? Angels said to have mated with human women back at the dawn of recorded history? These angels (which were supposed to be originally pure spirit) must have found some way of composing a material body for themselves in order to be able to mate with human women.

Was there such a thing as Grigori DNA then?

Such would be the stuff for highly speculative and extremely creative science papers.

But it so happened that Grigori DNA on an object from space that fell to Earth went through a ripple in time back 11 years to the Saint Nicholas Monastery at Verkhoturye where it struck a visiting peasant pilgrim from the Siberian village of Pokrovskoye- Grigori Rasputin.

As a result of angelic Grigori making contact with human Grigori- the whole world would change forever.

Rasputin would lead to Lenin and the USSR. Which would lead to Stalin and the USSR. Fear of Stalin and the USSR would lead to the middle classes of Germany ensuring the parliamentary victory of a man named Adolf Hitler in the Reichstag.

And so on.

And so on.

All the way forward to a man named Kim Jong-un facing a standoff with a man named Donald Trump.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday August 20th
2017.

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