What Is Causing The Paris Riots: A Free Verse Poem As Explanation

December 7, 2018 at 11:58 pm (Comedy, Geopolitics and International Relations, Horror, International Intrigue, love, Movies, Music, Musicals, Mystery, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Several weeks ago, the Cyborg Octopus Kraken
Who called himself Emperor Napoleon VI
Had been dining with his wife Medusa
(The ex-Gorgon famed for getting people stoned
In the glory days of classical and ancient Greece)
In a Parisienne cafe
When Medusa suddenly found Vincent Van Gogh’s ear
In her house salad
so she sent it back.

“I hate to do this to you, Banksy,”
The salad prep chef said to
The famous graffiti street artist
As he cut his ear off with a carving knife
Banksy had thought of becoming a musician
As well as an artist
but now he had no ear for music.

“Much better,” Medusa said
As she bit into Banksy’s ear.
“You’re becoming somewhat cannibalistic in your old age,”
The Kraken remarked as he bit into the evening dinner special
which was roast octopus.

“How old do you think I am?”
asked Medusa
who used Oil of Olay
She looked very young indeed.

Medusa then bit into the fried snake
As the hairs on her head stood on end.

“Charmed I’m sure,” Sir Anthony Hopkins tipped his hat
And bowed to the couple
as he exited
(He had eaten the roast lamb souvlaki that evening)
He was in Paris doing a one night special performance
at Le Phantome Masquerade
Musique de Le Soir
Faberge Garnier Christian Dior Coco Chanel Opera House –
a musical version of
The Silence of The Lambs.

Jodie Foster emerged from the restaurant closet
with a woman tennis player and a woman golf player
and followed the knighted Welsh actor
to the theatre
as director Martin Scorsese
tried to hail a taxi driver
and Beelzebub the lord of the flies
plotted the last temptation of Christ.

“You don’t seem to be enjoying your roast octopus this evening,”
The Norse trickster god Loki
(who looked and talked a lot like actor Jack Nicholson)
remarked
as he fed Donald Trump’s toupee
(which he had swiped from the Oval Office of the White House)
to the restaurant Maitre’ D’s pet red spider monkey.

“I’d like to be Emperor of France,”
The Kraken calling himself Napoleon VI
wiped a tear from his eye,
“but I can’t while Emmanuel Macron is President.”

“Hm, I think I can do something about that,”
Loki remarked as Ricky Martin’s dinner date for the evening
accidentally peed all over Loki’s Casablanca Humphrey Bogart looking white dinner jacket
turning it a very vibrant yellow colour.

“And I think I’ve got an idea,”
Loki remarked
as he looked down at his now yellow coloured jacket
and just received a text message on his smart phone
from his accountant
on what would be the heating cost
of his Paris apartment
next year.

“And that dear children,”
The inebriated looking Santa Claus
took off his wired rimmed glasses
and wiped them
at the Ayn Rand Daycare Centre
where he was speaking,
“is how the origins of the Paris riots
and fires came to pass.”

-A comedy horror poem
and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday December 7th
2018.


Rita Hayworth won’t be coming down Emmanuel Macron’s chimney tonight.

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Krampus Takes A Paris Detour On Krampusnacht

December 5, 2018 at 11:58 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, Horror, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

It was the night of Krampusnacht
and all through the house
in Austria and Bavaria
and places thereabout
The Austro-Bavarian demon/goat hybrid Krampus roamed
the son of the Norse goddess Hel and Bucca Dhu
Hel who was Loki’s daughter and the goddess ruler
of the Norse underworld in Niflheim

Bucca Dhu who was the Black Goat horned god of the winter months
in Cornish witchcraft

Hel came down from her frostbitten parts north of Thule, Hyperborea and Scandinavia
And Bucca Dhu traveled east from the Cornish coast across the wild Cornish moors and east across England and then across the channel
And northeastwards towards the Alps of Bavaria and Austria
They met
And they spent 40 days and 40 nights making out in various locales
Austria, Bavaria, Croatia, the Czech Republic, Hungary, the South Tyrol region and the province of Trento in northern Italy, Slovakia and Slovenia
The product of their union was Krampus whose name is derived from the German word krampen meaning claw

Krampus is the demonic anti-Santa
The entity who punishes bad children on Krampusnacht (the evening of December 5th) in the regions of Central Europe named above
Just as Saint Nicholas rewards good children on Saint Nicholas’ Night
(December 6th)
Tonight however the cosmic powers that be
Determined that Krampus must take a detour
and drag screaming down to Hell
The cougar chasing, mascara and make-up wearing, metrosexual elitist snob President of France Emmanuel Macron
For the gods and goddesses of all the ancient religions loved Paris
And thanks to Macron’s stupidity, Paris was burning
And so Macron must be punished
And the instrument of punishment: Krampus

So Krampus pushed Macron into his black sack of coal
and took him to Hell
The underworld realm of Hades
Where he was ferried across the River Styx by Charon
And then bitten in the ass by the 3-headed dog Cerberus
Kicked in the balls by Persephone the Queen of the Underworld
And barfed on by Napoleon the 1st Emperor of the French

He was then escorted to Tartarus by Krampus
While there he passed one of the waiting rooms to Tartarus
What looked to be an old schoolroom from the 1920s
Where the immortal dominatrix Sherrielock Holmes
the immortal twin sister of the great detective Sherlock Holmes
had been hired by Hades for a week to give spankings to naughty boys
prior to their entering Tartarus

She had been hired temporarily to replace the 3 Furies (Erinyes)
who had all come down with a bad case of the flu

“Yes, yes!” Cried Macron as his mascara started running
due to the heat of the nearby flames,
“I need to be spanked by Sherrielock!”

Krampus smiled sadistically and replied
in a voice more sinister than that of the Soup Nazi on Seinfeld,
“No Sherrielock for you!”.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
on Krampusnacht
Wednesday December 5th
2018.


The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec hoping to convince Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing to join her in surpassing the Guinness Book of World Records world record for the most consecutive days and nights of continuously making out which is currently held by the Norse goddess Hel and the Cornish Black Goat horned god Bucca Dhu.

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Reblog of The Road Not Taken

December 3, 2018 at 11:32 pm (Poetry) (, )

A well written analysis of Robert Frost’s poem The Road Not Taken.

Sunshiny SA Site

By Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Source  :  https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/the-road-not-taken-by-robert-frost

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The Irish Celtic Goddess Morrigan In Ukraine On Saint Andrew’s Day

November 30, 2018 at 11:59 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )


The Irish Celtic Goddess Morrigan In Ukraine On Saint Andrew’s Day

The Irish Celtic Goddess Morrigan awaited war
War between Russia and Ukraine
The Celtic goddess of War stood there
Alongside Ares the Greek god of war
And Thor the Norse god of thunder

They stood in the woods not far from Voronkiv
the village home to Metropolitan Pavel
Of the Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Of the Patriarchate of Moscow
The home was being raided by the SBU
(Ukraine’s state security service)
Accusing Metropolitan Pavel of inciting religious hostility
Because he criticized Patriarch Filaret of the Kiev Patriarchate
Of the newly autocephalous Ukrainian Orthodox Church
Recently recognized by the Patriarch of Constantinople

But Metropolitan Pavel was not at his home in Voronkiv
He was at Kiev-Pechersk Lavra Monastery
Where he was the Father-Superior
Kiev-Pechersk Lavra Monastery the monastery of the caves
The caves which held perfectly preserved bodies of monastic saints
Whose fame was known throughout the entire Czarist Russian Empire
And as such inspired Lenin to have his body preserved in Moscow after death (and after founding the USSR)
to compete with Kiev-Pechersk Lavra Monastery
to show that Marx and Lenin were gods superior to the Christian Holy Trinity
Yet Lenin’s preservation depended on 20th Century mummification techniques
whereas those of the saintly monks of Kiev-Pechersk Lavra monastery were supernaturally preserved

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith sent a succubus to the monastery

to seduce Pavel and prepare the way for war
Pavel asked for the intercession of Saint Nicholas II
(Russia’s last Czar who in the last few months of his life
had come to believe that Mary the Mother of Jesus
had indeed appeared at Fatima Portugal from May to October 1917
And had asked the Church and the world to pray
for the Consecration and conversion of Russia)
To pray in the Communion of Saints in Heaven
that he be given the strength to withstand
the temptation of the succubus

Meanwhile in the forest near Voronkiv
a black jaguar with silver eyes had attacked both Ares and Thor
Possessed of a mighty supernatural strength he wounded both these deities
Morrigan fled through the woods to escape the jaguar
She succeeded
The black jaguar was nowhere to be seen

Then she heard a forlorn howl
The Irish Celtic Goddess Morrigan turned her head

And there stood a white wolf with blue eyes
gazing at her
His eyes were hypnotic
Morrigan slowly took her dress off
And lay back in the autumn grasses of Ukraine
on Saint Andrew’s Day
The wolf turned into a handsome naked man
Who mounted her,

“Adonais Lupine!” The succubus in the chapel of the monastery shrieked

The best laid plans of Lilith and three ancient deities for war
Had seemingly gone astray.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday November 30th 2018.

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The Camp Fire of Cthulhu: A Poem

November 15, 2018 at 11:55 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Horror, International Intrigue, News, Poetry, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , )

Cthulhu had recently started fires in northern California
now tired of this particular spectacle
Cthulhu swung around continents and across oceans
Past straits and across seas to the eastern Mediterranean shore
There he noticed Zeus’ Kraken Scion of Apollyon burrowing into tunnels
in the Gaza Strip

The fallen Archangel Samael
The Talmudic angel of death
The Satan mentioned in the Book of Job
(that one time it wasn’t the Satan who is also Lucifer the Devil)
A former angelic prosecuting attorney
and a Prime Minister in the celestial realms of Heaven
turned Transgendered back in 1931
and went to live in Mexico
where he is worshipped as Santa Muerte (the female but really Transgendered Saint Death) the god and deity of drug dealers
and drug gangs throughout the Americas
Recently Samael Satan Santa Muerte took a holiday in Israel
and showed up as a snake in the cracks of the Western Wall
on the Temple Mount
and chased a pigeon trying to eat it

Not one to eat pigeon pie or humble pie
the Celtic stag god Cernunnos went hunting in Europe
he hunted humans and killed them
and made trophies of their heads and drank their blood
and said, “I have seen the future and it’s me.”

-An occultic poem
written by Christopher
Thursday November 15th
2018

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Haiku About Stan Lee R.I.P.

November 12, 2018 at 10:53 pm (Arts, Biographical, Mythology, News, Obituaries, Poetry) (, , , , , , , )

He was a marvel
in the universe and life
Spiderman’s tears fall

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Armistice Day- 100 Years Later

November 11, 2018 at 11:49 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, News, Poetry) (, , , , , , )

The 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month
The guns fell silent on the Western Front
stillness now reigned where fury once raged
The ground soaked with men’s blood
who had struggled to take a piece of ground
and then covered over
with the blood of men from the other side
who struggled to take it back
and so on and so forth
back and forth a piece of ground would change hands
and the exchange was always paid in blood
And Death made his cocktail out of libations of blood
from both sides
And served a buffet of flesh and bone
from both sides
to the worms of the earth.

And now that was over
The roaring thunder of guns
now replaced by the silence of the dead
In the distance a piper pipes a lament
for those who will never again see the fairness of the land
from which they came
or the love in the eyes of those loved ones they left

In the distance a skylark cries
and the wind blows across fields
which had four years of seeding
from munitions and guns

And the harvest would be civil war in Russia
Civil strife and labour unrest when those who survived the war
returned to their homelands in what was a hard and bitter peace
A demagogue taking power in Germany
who would plant seeds of destruction and hate
that would last far into this century
on this the 100th Anniversary of the end of that 1st World War

Remembering that time 100 years ago
when the guns fell silent on the Western front
2 minutes of silence paid for those who gave their lives in that war
2 minutes of silence for those who went through 4 years of Hell
2 minutes of silence for those who lie in graves
And whose only voice is now that of the cold November winds
blowing across the desolate landscape
perhaps searching for that elusive peace
that was supposed to come
with the end of the war to end all wars.

-A poem written by Christopher
Sunday November 11th 2018.

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Armistice Eve- 100 Years Later

November 10, 2018 at 11:55 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Poetry, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

On Armistice Eve 1918, Ares the Greek god of war, Thor the Norse god of thunder and Morrigan the Celtic goddess of war walked sadly across the battlefields of France
for their handiwork was about to come to an end in less than another 24 hours
Thor asked, When shall we three meet again?

The answer would be in more than another 20 years
when a modern worshiper of Thor and Odin and a hater of the God of the Jews
would seek to expand his reach across the globe.

Now 100 years later,
the anniversary of Armistice Eve
The three were plagued with sad memories
as they recalled the tapestry of blood and slaughter they had weaved a century ago
had come to an end.

Anniversary of sad times
Ares wiped a tear
Thor blew his nose
and Morrigan asked,
Now, when shall we three meet again?

In a nearby field, a row of poppies gently blew in the evening breeze
no doubt the answer was there blowing in the wind
as in the sky, the skylarks cried,
wondering whether they’d be joined by raven-crows or snow white doves.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday November 10th
2018.

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Reblog of T-Rex Find: A Poem

November 4, 2018 at 11:46 pm (Comedy, Entertainment, Humour, Poetry) (, , )

A poem about a T-Rex (Tyrannosaurus Rex) I wrote 4 years ago:

Dracul Van Helsing

T-Rex Find: A Poem

It was the most unusual dinosaur bone
a T-Rex with an iPhone
the whimsical carnivore
not wishing to appear a bore
had taken a selfie
like Uncle Alfie
he backed up without looking behind
silly creature with silly mind
and while doing his monologue of schtick and corn
backed right into a triceratops horn
that’s why this T-Rex became extinct before you were born.

-A humourous narrative poem
written by Christopher
Saturday November 1st
2014.

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Wilkie The Cat As Count Dracula: A Halloween Theatrical Poem

October 29, 2018 at 10:43 pm (Arts, Culture, Entertainment, Humour, Literature, Poetry, Satire, theatre, Theatre Arts) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Narrator:

Gather around, all ye folks,
If you’re Canadian, watch your tokes,
In this theatre, pot is for peeing and not for smokes.
Our story begins here on Broadway
where Donald Trump sought starlets to lay
before Vladimir Putin turned him gay

Oprah Winfrey (as a transgendered Othello) :

Oh where, oh where is Desdemona?
I lie here in bed making many a moana
but I hear no Desdemona a groana.

Narrator:

Ms. Winfrey, you’re in the wrong theatre
this is what happens when you drink too much beera
The LGBTQ production of Othello is next door
please watch those Jesuit condoms on the floor
as from this theatre to that, you kindly pass
while Pope Francis’ order celebrates a Baphomet Mass

Oprah:

Oh damn, oh damn,
so much for a grand slam,
Roseanne Barr plays a transgendered Iago
while Donald Trump calls Robert Mueller a fago.

Narrator:

And now Oprah is moving her ass
as from this theatre to that, she kindly does pass
And now we shall begin our own theatrical tale
as Greenpeace activist encounters a methane gas producing carbon emissions whale
caused by Jefferey the otter’s cooked extra spicy pork and beans tipping the scale

And the good ship Demeter crashes
as Mina Harker bats her eyelashes
for the methane gas producing whale has sunk the ship
while Greenpeace activist takes a Justin Trudeau inspired trip
And Count Dracula (played by Wilkie the Cat) swims ashore
while his coffin is carried by a yarmulke wearing rabbi wild boar
it’s a good thing the boar is no porcine Hannibal Lecter
otherwise his culinary tastes would violate the Mosaic laws inspector

I forgot to mention that Mitzi la feline actress Parisienne plays Mina Harker
as Dr. Jack Seward’s asylum patient Renfield eats Peter Parker
Spiderman is now gone
a marvel of a swan song
Lackey of Christopher Lee has triumphed over a Lee named Stan
as Antifa takes a statue of Robert E. into the can

The Confederate military hero
is to the political left a great big zero
even though he freed his own slaves long before did Ulysses S. Grant
but this is all ignored in a New York Times rant

Dracula swims ashore near Whitby Abbey
where Canterbury’s ex-ArchDruid Rowan Williams looks crabby
he should have had the lobster flambe instead of crabs a l’amour
given him while dallying with a young French paramour

And Jonathan Harker (played by Kelsey Grammer) watches in horror
as Dracula seduces his sweet love Lenore
oops! – wrong script! – Poe’s The Raven is the performance for tomorrow night
as this Wilkie production of Dracula shuts down this theatre’s marquee light

As Dr. Abraham Van Helsing played by David Hyde Pierce
moves in to collect Dracula’s Transylvanian government tax arrears
he stabs the vampiric nobleman through the heart
as the carbon emissions whale in the sea lets out one last fart.
Both Greenpeace activist and Count Dracula are now dead
The janitor will have to wipe the spot where Wilkie has bled
for a real stake was mistakenly used instead of a prop
the hazards of hiring for a prop hand a drunken sop.

-A Wilkie The Cat poem
written by Christopher
Saturday October 27th
2018.


Desdemona’s Death Scene by Dante Gabriel Rosetti
A scene from a 19th Century British production of William Shakespeare’s Othello
very different from an early 21st Century American production of Othello

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