Renfield: An Example of Traditional Toxic Masculinity?

January 16, 2019 at 11:54 pm (Commentary, Culture, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Philosophy, Politics, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


Rahaf Mohammed at a press conference in Toronto Ontario Canada yesterday.

At a press conference in Toronto yesterday, Rahaf Mohammed thanked Canada for granting her asylum.

She also dropped her family surname al-Qunun as her family had disowned her.

British MP Renfield R. Renfield when interviewed by CBC Radio Canada on the subject thought that this was an excellent idea on her part.

Particularly as social networking conspiracy theorists in the U.S. might link her with Q-Anon the supposed Deep State operative in the U.S. government who claimed the Deep State were plotting to oust Trump and bring leftist Democrats to power.

“Al-Qunun to Q-Anon,” Renfield pointed out, “This might confuse Alex Jones and other people like him.”

Radio-Canada asked Renfield who he thought Q-Anon was.

“Q-Anon,” Renfield replied, “is a supernatural spirit dragon entity named Kannon Bosatsu who poses as an 11-faced 1000 armed bodhisatvva who’s worshipped at various Buddhist monasteries in Kyoto, Japan. He’s considered the God of Mercy by these Buddhist monks in Kyoto as well as by Pope Francis in the Vatican. This Kannon (from whom Canon Japanese cameras get its name) can also spell his name Qannon. He decided to shorten it to Q-Anon when posing as an informer Deep State deep throat to conspiracy theorists in the U.S. for the same reason that PBS hires British commentators to explain to American audiences what’s happening on BBC dramas shown on PBS since Americans presumably have no clue to be able to figure out the plot of these shows themselves. Kannon to Qannon to Q-Anon – all these supernatural entities hide their true identity in plain sight. So American conspiracy theorists will never be able to figure it out since they don’t have a British commentator to explain it to them. Just like they never bother asking themselves if Donald Trump truly wants to save America like Deep State operative Q-Anon supposedly does, then why at his recent televised statements on the topic of the Wall did Trump have Jesuit priests wearing Baphomet figures rather than Christ figures on their Crosses standing behind him on one occasion and then on another occasion having a guy wearing a Masonic Great Architect of the Universe insigna pin on his lapel standing behind him and then actually speaking on the issue of border security and the Wall? All these demonic operatives are appearing in plain sight, showing up on news clips they show on their own YouTube channels and the channel hosts don’t even notice it. And they also should be asking themselves this question, walls can keep people out, yes, but can’t they also be used to keep people in?”.

. . .

German Cardinal Walter Kasper was dressed as the Hitchcockian character of Norman Bates dressed as his mother to celebrate a Mass in honour of the demon Baphomet at the Vatican.

After kissing the Baphomet’s ass at the end of Mass, he then got on the phone to talk with Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman on the subject of extraterrestrials visiting Earth.

. . .

The ghosts of Liberace and Truman Capote (recently granted dispensational leave from the Underworld by the Greek god Hades and the Norse goddess Hel) were dancing in one another’s arms in front of the White House on Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington DC as Rep. Nancy Pelosi and Sen. Chuck Schumer stood and applauded.

They were dancing over the news that the American Psychological Association had recently declared “traditional masculinity” toxic.

“I always knew traditional masculinity was toxic,” Capote’s ghost lisped, “I just knew it.”

“I knew it too,” Liberace’s ghost lisped back.

“I knew it before you did,” Capote lisped higher.

“No, you didn’t,” Liberace lisped higher still.

“Yes, I did,” Capote lisped higher and higher.

Soon both ghosts were involved in a psychedelically coloured bathrobe catfight as each man used their immaculately manicured ghostly fingernails to try to scratch the other.

They later did the same in a Washington DC deli fighting over the last piece of quiche pie.


In the days before non-toxic masculine ghosts were freed from Hel.

. . .

Renfield R. Renfield stood facing reporters on the steps of the Westminster Parliament in London where his plans alongside British Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn to defeat Theresa May’s government on a non-confidence motion had gone up in smoke just as a Japanese Buddhist dragon with 11 faces and 1000 arms flew by while roasting marshmallows with his mouth.

“The vast majority of Members of Parliament have spoken,” Renfield stated and then added, “The bastards.”

Renfield was asked by a reporter about the growing influence of the #MeToo Movement and the MP answered thus, “The #MeToo Movement have metamorphosed into modern day disciples of the ancient Anatolian Phrygian mother goddess Cybele whose purpose is to make eunuchs of every single male on earth or at least subject them to a high degree of wussification, pansyfication and sissyfication.”

A psychologist member of the American Psychological Association who was standing nearby remarked that Renfield was a good example of traditional masculinity being toxic.

Renfield (who had a license to kill like James Bond 007) pulled out a gun and shot and killed the psychologist on the spot.

Later Renfield’s friend Amadeus Emanon when he heard the news remarked, “Well I guess Renfield’s masculinity did turn out to be toxic for that particular American psychologist.”

“Fatally so,” Amadeus’ girlfriend Angelique Dumont added.

A Gillette ad created by Dracul Van Helsing 9 years ago attacking cheating heart masculinity back in the days when real men still created ads for Gillette.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday January 16th
2019.

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Amadeus’ Song: A Distant Mirror Reflects

January 9, 2019 at 11:19 pm (Arts, Culture, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic, International Intrigue, Music, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, Science-Fiction, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Singer Amadeus Emanon was in the recording studio of Aulos Music and Recording Ltd. on London’s Abbey Road.

His producer Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell gave him the thumbs up.

Amadeus started to sing,

In Beverly Hills, you never grow old
your body uses science to take on a new glow
Life eternal is now in a pill

On those nights when the moon rises high
and stardust mixes with water and wine
what was blood to the Son of Man falls on dry barren ground

This is the new Hollywood
replacing that holy wood of long ago
Golgotha’s hill gives way to the hills of Beverly

And now a new god beckons me from behind that silver screen
offering me love, sex and immortality
it’s all so thrilling and so new
All I have to do is give my soul away
And watch the light from blood red moon
signal the start of a brand new day
Amazon and Google like John the Baptist lead the way
5G flows into my brain like San Francisco’s golden rain
Circuitry and arteries have now fused and merged into one

The flashes of light and the deity in sight
They burst all around like galaxies abound
The celestial mass divides again and again
DNA has never been this way
Our being is changed in the twinkling of an eye
And we can do it all without that Carpenter guy

And so I’ve taken the Mark
My life is one with android electrical spark
I’ve changed this flesh for a mechanical heart
one that will forever beat even without love
I know I will live forever and never ever die
That fruit of tree in Garden is so yesterday
far too earthy and natural
nothing like today
when science and high tech have shown us the way

The lights of Metropolis of yesterday
have given way to Metropolis’ lights today
What was there on the screen of ’20s German Expressionist film
has come to pass with Transhumanist technocracy know-how
Lovecraft saw the Great Old Ones coming back
but not the shiny new gadgets they carried in their sack
They have offered us all the kingdoms of this world
gold, precious jewels and all diverse manners of pearl
and have offered us immortality to boot
We have now become the gods
And the food of the gods?
Our own souls
that we eat daily.
Amen and amen.

Heathcliff Dioynsus Campbell nodded that was a rap.

Amadeus took off his headphones and in his mind’s eye, saw a distant mirror.

To the Hollywood of the early 1940s when Carson Cody Albion Private Eye was offered immortality with a divinely human touch from the Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis:

The flesh was weak back then.

But, Amadeus reflected, thanks to advances in science and technology, the spirit itself has become weak.

And all of us are now ready to betray the Son of Man without so much as a kiss.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday January 9th
2018.

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The Day After: A Renfieldian Analysis

November 7, 2018 at 11:59 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, Horror, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

It was the day after the U.S. midterm elections.

As recently terminated U.S. Attorney-General Jeff Sessions asked his aide for directions to the nearest Unemployment line and Donald Trump began his campaign for Asshole of The Year Award among members of the White House Press Corps, Renfield R. Renfield shared his analysis of the U.S. midterms with his friend Amadeus Emanon.

“It appears Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was spot on in declaring the winners,” Renfield bit into a tuna fish sandwich.

“But it appears he was mistaken in his vision last Saturday about widespread violence at polling stations,” Amadeus bit into a peanut butter sandwich.

“Not necessarily,” Renfield belched, “I immediately relayed Michelangelo’s vision to Dr. Faustus Imhotep the acting head of DARPA as well as Peter Whitstable of Interpol. Whitstable took my personal brigade of British Army gurkas and staged two raids on shiploads of arms arriving in Florida. One was a shipload of arms that was intended for Antifa operatives sent to them by Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro and the other was a shipload of arms intended for white supremacists sent to them by Havana based Neo-Nazi billionaire Robur Pike. Dr. Faustus Imhotep sent DARPA contract assassins Pan Goatee and Panty Goatee to bump off suspected Antifa and Neo-Nazi provocateurs the evening before the U.S. midterm elections. As a result of this DARPA Night of The Long Cleavers and Long Machetes, the U.S. midterms voting went off without violence and undertakers in towns where Antifa operatives and Neo-Nazis lived picked up a little extra business this week.”

“Good to see you took action,” Amadeus remarked.

Suddenly a loud piercing scream came from outside.

“It sounds like our estate watch cat Nefertiti Galore has taken action against someone,” Renfield went running outside and was joined by Amadeus where they saw that the cat had scratched ten faces on a ten headed demon.

“Who is that demon?” Amadeus asked.

“Well if my photographic memory of illustrations in the Encyclopedia of Demons serves me correctly,” Renfield put on a pair of spectacles, “that’s Ravana the Rakshasa demon king of Lanka.”

“What could he possibly want on the Set estate?” Amadeus asked.

“Well the Boss,” Renfield was referring to the Estate’s owner the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set and not Bruce Springsteen, “recently bought an original authentic statue of Sita who was Prince Rama’s bride that Ravana kidnapped millenia ago and so maybe Ravana wanted to steal it.”

After receiving catclaw scratches on his ten faces while in London, Ravana fled to Ravenna where he spent his days and nights studying the city’s Byzantine and Gothic architecture.

Happy Diwali to all my Indian friends. 😊

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday November 7th
2018.


Panty Goatee spent the night before U.S. midterm election day slitting the throats of Antifa operatives and Neo-Nazi white supremacists.

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Michelangelo Names The Winners of The 2018 U.S. Midterms

November 5, 2018 at 11:52 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, love, News, Politics, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

“It was 50 years ago today that Richard M. Nixon was elected President of the United States,” Amadeus Emanon read aloud from the This Day In History column.

“One thing I always liked about Nixon,” Renfield remarked as he fed his goldfish called Checkers that a voter had given him, “is his insightful analysis in his statement, “That whole Bohemian Grove thing is the faggiest god damned thing you can imagine. I never shake hands with anybody who comes from San Francisco anymore.” And as a result of Nixon’s advice, I’ve never ever shaken hands with anybody who comes from San Francisco.”

“Well, that would certainly prevent you from picking up any Nancy Pelosi girl fleas,” Amadeus noted.

“Or dog fleas either,” Renfield rubbed the fur of the Set household’s pet cat Nefertiti Galore.

“Wasn’t the Bohemian Grove the place where Henry Kissinger went running around nude in the woods?” Amadeus asked.

“Yes and a bunch of California redwood trees have been treated for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder ever since,” Renfield remarked as he received a nude photo text message from Vietnamese vampiress Ho Babylon Minh that had just the opposite effect that Kissinger had on the trees.

As both the goldfish Checkers and the cat Nefertiti Galore went into their respective states of shock upon seeing Renfield’s bulging erection, Amadeus remarked, “I see the psychic lobster Michelangelo has named the winners of tomorrow’s U.S. midterm elections.”

Amadeus had just received a text message from Dr. Cadbury Rocher down at the Set Enterprises lab.

“And who will the winners be?” asked Renfield who being genetically created in a lab had no mother to warn him about what physical activities might cause blindness.

Amadeus putting on a pair of welder’s dark glasses replied, “It was rather strange. Michelangelo in rather vague Delphi oracle like terms said “Both Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders will come out the winners.”

“Maybe what that means,” Renfield ejaculated both wisdom and a more physical substance, “is that the Republicans will maintain control of the House or the Senate or both while of those Democrats who are elected, a great many of them will support Bernie Sanders for the Democratic Presidential Nomination in 2020.”

“You might have something there,” Amadeus admitted.

“What I need right now,” Renfield stumbled around, “is the phone number for the nearest optometrist. I feel the need to book an appointment.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday November 5th
2018.


The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith in a poster warning about the hazards of snow blindness.

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Reblog- Renfield’s Dream of Donald Trump Wearing Kilts

October 8, 2018 at 10:48 pm (Fantasy, Geopolitics and International Relations, Humour, International Intrigue, News, Poetry, Politics, Satire, Vampire novel) (, , , )

A vampire novel chapter I wrote 3 years ago today:

Dracul Van Helsing

Renfield’s Dream of Donald Trump Wearing Kilts

As Renfield R. Renfield slept on the couch, Amadeus Emanon was sitting in his chair singlehandedly eating every single piece of KFC chicken they had purchased earlier that evening.

Amadeus wondered where the complementary container of special Bavarian mushroom sauce that came with the bucket of chicken had gotten to.

Unbeknownst to Amadeus while he was in the bathroom washing his hands, Renfield had eaten every single drop of the special Bavarian mushroom sauce said to contain “Sherrie’s secret ingredients”.

Which would probably explain the dream Renfield was having at the moment.

Renfield was dreaming that he was out on the Isle of Skye in Scotland when who should he see come skipping and jumping through the glen but Donald Trump wearing a kilt.

Donald Trump (singing and dancing while wearing a kilt):

Oh I went out on the Isle of Skye
I…

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Renfield Discusses Wicca Witchcraft, Mind Control and The Kavanaugh Nomination With Amadeus

October 5, 2018 at 11:10 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Renfield Discusses Wicca Witchcraft, Mind Control and The Kavanaugh Nomination With Amadeus

“What are you contemplating?” Amadeus asked Renfield as he ate an egg sandwich.

“I’m thinking about a disturbing article I came across from 2008 regarding Kavanaugh accuser psychologist Christine Blasey Ford and her research on “self-hypnosis” and creating “artificial situations” in the mind for a neurolinguistic programming firm,” Renfield answered

“Oh?” Amadeus paused in eating his sandwich, “And what is meant by “self-hypnosis” and creating “artificial situations” in the mind?”.

“Well aside from its application in psychology and psychiatry, there is an amateur form of it widely practiced in popular culture,” Renfield answered.

“There is?” Amadeus was curious.

“The most popular form of it is called the Silva Method,” Renfield answered, “what used to be called Silva Mind Control about 30 or 40 years ago until news of the CIA brainwashing experiments and the methods of various mind control cults like the People’s Temple in Jonestown, Guyana came into the public consciousness.”

Not knowing the history of the People’s Temple, Amadeus poured himself a glass of Kool-Aid and drank it asking, “What is the Silva Method formerly Silva Mind Control?”.

“A very simple form of self-hypnosis,” Renfield explained, “also known as guided imagery. You’re asked to imagine in your mind a very quiet place like by a lake, a stream or in a forest or meadow or some beautiful tranquil place. You’re asked to empty your mind completely of all other things and just clearly visualize the place. Then you’re asked to either visualize people or animals or maybe other beings coming to talk to you.”

“Really?” Amadeus put some cheese on a slice of bread.

“And here’s where it sometimes crosses the line from self-hypnosis to the beginning stages of shamanism as practiced by a Siberian shaman or Lakota Sioux Medicine Man or African tribal witch doctor when these beings appear,” Renfield went on, “for they can cease being figments of your imagination and sometimes become actual spirits you’re in contact with. For the Siberian shaman or the Lakota Sioux Medicine Man or the African tribal witch doctor, they’ve undergone years of training to tell the good spirits from the bad spirits. Not so for today’s products of our current modern educational system who have the Silva Method or Guided Imagery or whatever it is called suddenly thrust upon them. You could suddenly find yourself under demonic influences faster than if you’re fooling around with a Ouija board.”

“Really?” Amadeus’ face turned as white as the colour that his shirt used to be before he started eating chocolate ice cream.

“Yes, there was once a popular non-fiction book writer called Napoleon Hill who wrote a book called Think and Grow Rich in which he recommended to his readers an exercise in Visualization and Guided Imagery,” Renfield explained, “they were asked to imagine themselves presiding over a government Cabinet room. And members of the Cabinet that Napoleon Hill selected for his own personal advisers were men like Abraham Lincoln and George Washington. And a few others. Hill would visualize the cabinet room clearly and then clearly visualize each one of his advisers and cabinet members come into the room and sit down and give him advice. Hill once got so scared when he started noticing the Lincoln and Washington he was summoning seemed to start developing personalities not under his control. He was so scared that he stopped doing the Visualization and Guided Imagery exercise for a while.”

Amadeus looked out the window and noticed the 2 demon possessed dogs of the Cotswolds- a three headed dog like Cerberus and the reincarnated Hound of The Baskervilles running and barking across the Set Estate while the neighbourhood cat Tinkleton Pinkleton ran up a tree clutching a copy of the new bestselling book The Silva Method For Cats.

“What about self-hypnosis and artificial situations in the mind as practiced by psychiatrists and psychologists like Christine Blasey Ford?” Amadeus asked.

“Well, they’re supposed to be practiced in a more professional manner of course,” Renfield admitted, “but on the question of hypnosis by psychologists, there were several notorious cases back in the 1990s and early 2000s where the therapist botched the therapy session and somehow inadvertently gave the patients false memories while they were under hypnosis. The patients were convinced that they had been sexually assaulted by a family member. The courts initially believed the patient’s testimony and sentenced the offending family member to prison. Then upon further investigation, it was discovered that the therapist by misplaced leading questions had botched the memory recall for the patient under hypnosis and given them memories of events that had never actually happened in reality. However because the patient thoroughly believed that the events had indeed happened, they made quite convincing eyewitness testimony in a court of law and several innocent men and even a few innocent women were falsely convicted of sexual assault.”

“Now in terms of “self-hypnosis” and creating “artificial situations” in the mind, it’s intended to help patients deal with stress either in the present or a future situation by imagining and clearly visualizing something to help them in that situation,” Renfield stated.

“I see,” Amadeus nodded.

“But suppose you hypnotized yourself into imagining a certain situation in the past that never happened but you imagined to convince yourself that it did,” Renfield pointed out, “think how convincing you’d be on the witness stand.”

“Are you saying that Christine Blasey Ford using her expertise in this matter hypnotized herself into thinking that she was sexually assaulted by Brett Kavanaugh?” Amadeus asked thoroughly shocked.

“That’s the trillion dollar question,” Renfield replied, “like the profits Planned Parenthood earns each year.”

“Where does Sen. Dianne Feinstein fit into all this?” Amadeus asked.

“I wouldn’t trust Dianne Feinstein as far as I could throw her,” Renfield answered, “a woman anonymously tells Sen. Feinstein that she was sexually assaulted by Kavanaugh but doesn’t want it revealed. Sen. Feinstein doesn’t even mention such a serious charge as this even in a closed door session of the committee. But then just when it looks like Kavanaugh’s nomination is about to be approved, lo and behold the accuser’s name is publicly leaked to the media and Sen. Feinstein announces it. How convenient. The fact that Dr. Ford studied self-hypnosis and creating artificial situations in the mind is very suspicious. I might have thought it was coincidental if I hadn’t discovered that actress Alyssa Milano is a friend of Dr. Christine Blasey Ford and asked Alyssa to sit behind Brett Kavanaugh while he was testifying.”

“Wasn’t she the one who played Phoebe on Charmed?” Amadeus asked.

“That’s right,” Renfield nodded, “she’s also a practicing witch in real life like her character on Charmed. When she sat there behind Kavanaugh, she kept burrowing her eyes into the back of his neck- you can see it for yourself if you watch the clip- intensely concentrating and looking all weird and spaced out as if she was trying to cast a Wiccan spell on him.”

“Wow, weird,” said Amadeus.

“America has become like the Weimar Republic and Hitler’s Third Reich, infested with occult practices and peculiar beliefs that fall across all parts of the political spectrum from left to center to right,” Renfield pointed out, “in such an irrational nutcase political setting which makes Vladimir Putin smile at the thought that America will destroy itself on its own, it’s thoroughly conceivable that a woman might hypnotize herself into saying she was sexually assaulted by someone whose political ideas she violently disagrees with. I’m not saying that’s what happened but given America’s current political environment, it could have happened like that. America is like Rome in the days of the Emperor Caligula.”

Amadeus noticed a newspaper article on how Canada’s Prime Minister Justin Trudeau relies on an imaginary ET Gray friend named Gali-Gula from the planet Nibiru to give him advice and wisdom.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday October 5th
2018.

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Phantom of The Opera: A Poem As Sung and Recorded By Amadeus Emanon

September 14, 2018 at 10:37 pm (Culture, Entertainment, Fantasy, Film, Folklore, Ghost Story, love, Music, music videos, Musicals, Poetry, Romance, theatre, Theatre Arts, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Phantom of The Opera: A Poem
Sung and Recorded By Amadeus Emanon

Amadeus Emanon was at London music promoter Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell’s Wuthering Heights and Glencoe Hospitality Recording Studios (owned by Heathcliff’s company Aulos Music and Recording Ltd.) to record his first album Erik’s Lament: The Agony and Ecstasy of A Phantom In The Night.

Amadeus Emanon sang this song:

Phantom of The Opera: A Lament

Oh Phantom, you are the lonely one
You loved Christine who was daylight
to your realms of darkness
She let the sunlight shine in your heart
You taught her to sing
But she taught you to love
And hers by far was the greater gift

There in your lair beneath the Opera deep
Where you lay many an hour to lie there and weep
And let the hate consume your heart like heat
Burned and singed was it making your scar look neat

For your look you thought no one could love
Depriving you of joy on earth and in heaven above
But Christine looked and she saw
but you turned away and you let her go
For in the mirror you saw just the scar
But in her eyes, she saw your very soul
But you did not see and you did not know
And your love departed by the river’s flow

Oh what music you could have made
But your heart you buried in hate’s grave
For Christine wanted to be your love not your slave
Now she’s left you and gone away
While you pine all night and long for day
The day you once had but chased away
leaving you with childhood toys you used to play
And now your soul then your music will decay.

(-A poem written by Christopher
Friday September 7th 2018)

Inspired by the character of Erik as he is portrayed in Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical The Phantom of The Opera.

Amadeus Emanon as he appears on the cover of his album (making it look like he was posing with his violin in an old 19th Century style photograph)

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Notwithstanding The Hurricane Winds of Change

September 10, 2018 at 11:11 pm (Arts, Culture, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Music, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Notwithstanding The Hurricane Winds of Change

Amadeus Emanon was working to get an album of songs he had personally written produced by London music promoter Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell the CEO of Aulos Music and Recording Ltd.

It was helpful to Amadeus’ cause that it was his boss the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set (owner of Set Enterprises) who lent Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell the money to buy Aulos Music and Recording Ltd. for himself (Heathcliff had previously been Executive Vice-President of the company).

Of course Heathcliff probably would not have signed Amadeus to a recording contract despite that unless Amadeus had been both a talented songwriter and a talented singer.

Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell’s good friend the New Orleans vampiress and songstress Angelique Dumont (best known for her role as Christine Daae in many West End London theatre productions of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of The Opera since 2007) had highly recommended Amadeus Emanon.

Both Amadeus and Angelique were taking a break from their recording session at Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell’s Wuthering Heights and Glencoe Hospitality Recording Studios on London’s Abbey Road.

They were meeting with Amadeus’ good friend British MP Renfield R. Renfield in Lord Poseidon God of The Seas’ Unparalleled Fish ‘N Chips Shop – a favourite of Amadeus.

“So,” Renfield looked shocked as Amadeus ate only one plate of Fish ‘N Chips (Amadeus had been scolded quite a lot lately by Angelique Dumont to cut down on his large appetite since he would soon be appearing in a photo shoot for the cover of his new album), “It appears that our Alberta-based Canadian vampire hunter friend approves of Ontario Premier Doug Ford’s decision to use the notwithstanding clause of the Canadian Constitution to overrule Ontario Superior Court Justice Edward Belobaba’s decision to disallow Ford’s new legislation The Better Local Government Act. Not because Dracul approves of Doug Ford (whom he calls the Ontario Donald Trump) but because by becoming the first Ontario Premier to use the Notwithstanding clause he might finally encourage politicians in Canada to grow pairs of balls and start using the Notwithstanding Clause to give unelected liberal social activist judges the raspberry they so richly deserve. For too long these unelected judicial jackasses have been reading their own personal views into things the constitution doesn’t even mention and using it to advance their own perverted and degenerate social agenda. Proof positive Dracul notes that Doug Ford is right this one time is that the 2 far left wing liberal rags in Toronto- The Globe and Mail as well as The Toronto Star- appear to have their panties in a knot and are in one Hell of an outburst of whining and snivelling over the fact Ford is using the Notwithstanding Clause.”

“So that’s the way things now stand in Canada, eh?” Amadeus ate a piece of Maple Leaf bacon 🥓 while Angelique watched disapprovingly.

“And then Dracul notes smoking recreational marijuana becomes officially legal next month which should should bring many unelected liberal social activist judges out of their smoke 💨 filled closets where they get many of their ideas from,” Renfield remarked.

. . .

Set Enterprises’ Dr. Cadbury Rocher was wondering why Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster had blown so many mathematical equations while typing with his lobster claws on his waterproof underwater iPad in his lobster tank.

Usually Michelangelo was so good at being able to crack difficult mathematical equations that even the world’s most advanced computers 🖥 were incapable of cracking.

It was then that Dr. Rocher noticed the remaining stub of reefer of Canadian recreational cannabis at the bottom of Michelangelo’s lobster tank.

. . .

Renfield went back to the Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum dungeons where he was interrogating members of a rogue branch of Britain’s MI-6 who were plotting a chemical attack on civilians who were living in Idlib province in Syria to give NATO the excuse to take direct military action against Syrian President Bashar al-Assad’s Government in Damascus.

Renfield was getting the MI-6 operatives to talk by forcing them to watch (with very loud audio) home movie made videos of former Philippines 🇵🇭 First Lady Imelda Marcos singing songs to her husband former Philippines 🇵🇭 dictator Ferdinand Marcos as he lay comatose on his deathbed in a hospital in Honolulu, Hawaii on September 28th 1989 (doctors speculated that it was Imelda’s singing 🎤 that speeded up Ferdinand Marcos’ departure into the afterlife- no doubt figuring that Hell would be an improvement).

Every MI-6 operative that Renfield did this to immediately cracked and was soon singing like a canary.

Renfield brought in a wild nightingale from outside to join the MI-6 canaries in their singing.

. . .

Hurricane Florence now a category 4 hurricane was heading straight towards North and South Carolina.

Florence was a rare kind of hurricane in that, unbeknownst to NASA, the whirlwind in the hurricane was being directed by a vampiress.

The vampiress herself was named Florence.

Florence de Medici.

A vampiress who during her mortal life back in the Italian Renaissance had been an influential and powerful Florentine courtesan- Signora Florence de Medici.

A woman who had been turned into a vampiress by her unholy spiritual godmother- the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith- the mother of all vampires.

And now Florence was directing Florence against the Carolinas.

. . .

Flashback 109 years ago.

November 1909- King Edward VII of Britain had gone to a forest in a public park to meet with a woman.

But this was no ordinary woman.

She was a vampiress.

She was meeting with King Edward VII because she had shocking information (so she said) on what the King’s nephew the Kaiser Wilhelm II of Germany was planning.

King Edward VII walked through the bleak November forest until he came upon her:

The Countess Draculina- daughter of Dracula

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday September 10th
2018.

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Hitler’s Ghost Views Paris and The Eiffel Tower As Amadeus and Angelique Make Out

August 23, 2018 at 10:42 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, love, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

Hitler’s Ghost Views Paris and The Eiffel Tower As Amadeus and Angelique Make Out

Amadeus Emanon and his girlfriend the New Orleans vampiress Angelique Dumont were spending a romantic getaway in Paris France 🇫🇷.

The vampiress had stocked up on Dr. Cadbury Rocher’s special sunblock which prevented vampiresses from being fried to a crisp in the daylight sun.

They boated along the Seine River and lunched in elegant Parisienne street cafes as artists painted their portraits.

They watched someone wearing a Donald Trump mask dive into the river and announce to the world, “It’s official. I’m in Seine.”

They visited Notre Dame Cathedral and kissed under one of the gargoyles.

Not since the Hunchback of Notre Dame had lit up the night with Esmeralda the gypsy had the gargoyle seen such action.

Amadeus and Angelique then went to a spot with a great view of the Eiffel Tower and made out there.

Moments before, Amadeus had received a text message from his friend the British MP Renfield R. Renfield pointing out that today was the 79th Anniversary of the signing of the Nazi-Soviet Pact.

Renfield said he had just posted a message on the timeline of Vladimir Putin’s Facebook page to that effect and got a bunch of Russian 🇷🇺 expletives hurled at him in return.

And speaking of Nazis, Hitler’s Ghost had temporarily left the body of the grey wolf he was possessing and was walking in astral spirit form through the streets of Paris recounting memories of his glorious triumphal trip to Paris on June 28th 1940 after he had conquered the French nation.

He stood alongside Amadeus and Angelique as they looked at their tourist maps (fearing that Trump’s NSA would monitor the GPS on their smart phones) and stood looking out at the city before he then turned and gazed at the Eiffel Tower.

He then looked at Amadeus and Angelique who had dropped their tourist maps and were now kissing.

“Oh,” Der Fuhrer mused aloud to himself, “to be alive and young and in Paris.”

Coincidentally at that very same moment, Donald Trump was saying the exact same thing as he was watching an old reality TV show with Paris Hilton on Netflix.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday August 23rd
2018.

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Westminster Terror Attack, Global Nuclear War and Most Livable Cities

August 14, 2018 at 10:12 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Westminster Terror Attack, Global Nuclear War and Most Livable Cities

CNN’s Anderson Cooper (speaking directly into the camera): Meanwhile a high ranking police source in London has told CNN News that the suspect arrested in today’s terrorist motor vehicle attack running down cyclists near the Westminster Parliament in the British capital has specifically requested that British MP Renfield R. Renfield not be allowed to interrogate him.
The suspect is said to be extremely terrified at the prospect of a Renfieldian interrogation and had put in a special request to the Prime Minister’s office that Sir Renfield not be allowed to interrogate him.
The same police source told CNN News that “some bleeding heart liberal in the Prime Minister’s office acceded to the suspect’s request.”
Sir Renfield R. Renfield MP has apparently cemented a reputation in the world of criminals, terrorists and drug dealers as being utterly ruthless in his interrogations of and even slow and painfully administered deaths of the individuals who inhabit the dark underbelly and shadowlands of the world global community.

. . .

Rosalynn Carter looked at her husband former U.S. President Jimmy Carter who looked ashen white when he put down his smart phone.

“Who was that who was calling, dear?” Rosalynn asked.

“I’d rather not say just yet,” Carter gulped, “I’m still having trouble accepting the gist of the conversation. I can’t believe that even someone like him would even ask such a question and even contemplate 🤔 such an action.”

“What was the question he asked?” Rosalynn wanted to know.

“He asked me whether I thought it was possible in all sincerity and honesty for the United States to win a global thermonuclear war and emerge both relatively intact and supremely triumphant,” Jimmy answered, “I tried telling him that it wasn’t but he didn’t seem convinced.”

Carter looked at the TV screen in their living room where Donald Trump’s smiling image appeared waving to supporters and giving the thumbs up.

. . .

“So,” Amadeus Emanon munched on potato chips, “I hear that the Economist Magazine Intelligence Unit has just come out with its list of the world’s Top 10 most livable cities.”

“Yes, I read that. Apparently the city of Calgary made #4 on the list of the Top 10,” Renfield was reading a magazine article about bloated cows 🐄, “a friend of mine who lives in Calgary said that Calgary might have made #1 on the list if there weren’t so many fat ugly blimps living in the city. The sight of such repulsive looking creatures, he tells me, succeeds in putting an immense damper on what is otherwise a magnificently beautiful city.”

“That’s very sad,” Amadeus reached for a glass of coconut 🥥 milk 🥛.

“It is,” Renfield put aside his slice of cheese after reading the article on bloated cows 🐄, “maybe if Pan Goatee increases his pace by quite a lot, Calgary might win the #1 spot next year.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday August 14th
2018.

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