Xi In Kazakhstan
The Greek goddess Hera was in Astana Kazakhstan today.
As was Pope Francis and Communist China’s supreme despot Xi Jinping.
Hera was visiting Astana today because she had heard that Zeus would be attending the Kazakhstani 7th InterFaith Congress.
Zeus was most definitely in Astana (the Kazakh capital currently suffers under the revolting name Nur-Sultan named after a Kazakhstani politician and former President Nursultan Nazarbayev).
(Editor’s Note from Renfield R. Renfield: Due to the efforts of a Calgary based geopolitical analyst and blogger who has been pointing out in his blog posts the past few days that the name Astana reflects good taste while the name Nur-Sultan reflects bad taste , the government of Kazakhstan announced earlier today that it would be changing the Kazakh capital’s name back to Astana).
Zeus was here to chase a beautiful Jordanian princess (a distant cousin of Jordan’s King Abdullah II) who was here in Astana attending the InterFaith Congress on behalf of the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan.
After cornering the Jordanian princess and asking her to come back to his palace on Mount Olympus where Zeus told her, “I’ll show you the way I ride my bulls”, the Jordanian princess shouted “Revenge for Ixion!” and kicked Zeus in the groin with her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes.
As Zeus lay on the ground groaning over his groin, Hera came by and hit Zeus over the head with the world’s largest watermelon that had been sent to the InterFaith Congress as a gift from former U.S. President Barack Obama.
Zeus now lay unconscious in a pool of Neo-Bolshevik red coloured juice while the ghost of Josef Stalin and the vampire Lev Tomi (who in his mortal life had been Leon Trotsky) sang that old Platters hit song “Oh yes I’m the Great Pretender…”
And speaking of pretenders and imposters, Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) had to google Who Was Jesus Christ? prior to giving a speech because the so-called Holy Father had forgotten who He was.
And also in Astana Kazakhstan on this day was Communist China’s paramount leader and all round despotic tyrant Xi Jinping.
Xi’s visit to Astana Kazakhstan on this day was his first trip outside Communist China ever since he had released bat virus from the Wuhan Institute of Virology and had begun the plandemic.
“Unholy bat virus, Batman,” a talking robin spoke as he flew down on top of Xi’s hair and crapped all over him.
An immediate search was underway to find some PH Unbalanced Shampoo to shampoo the robin crap out of Xi’s hair.
A bottle was found in The Homicidal Sasquatch Pub in downtown Astana.
Sitting in the pub was the great Irish-Jewish American science-fiction writer George Finneganburg who was talking to the Russian made cyborg sex robot Sophia.
Sophia had been invented by the former East German Stasi scientist Dr. Nicht Werhoffen (who now worked for the Russian FSB).
The cyborg sex robot Sophia had made out with Dracul Van Helsing on a roundtable in the Kazakh Palace of Religion in Astana in 2013.
An incident that was recorded in a geopolitical analyst’s blog post back in 2013 (although at that time the geopolitical analyst lived in Vancouver and not Calgary).
“You mean to say,” George Finneganburg quickly downed his beer, “that Dracul Van Helsing came up with a cyborg sex robot before I did? How the Hell am I going to break the news to Akira?”.
Once the robin crap had been washed out of Xi’s hair, he then met with Kazakh government officials.
After his Astana visit, Xi would be flying to the Russian capital of Moscow for a Kremlin summit meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin in order to discuss the war in Ukraine.
As such, Xi had brought along his Supernatural spirit advisor the Black Dragon to Astana and the winged demon serpent covered in charcoal black would also be accompanying Xi to Moscow.
There the Black Dragon would be meeting with Putin’s supernatural advisor “Saint Michael the Archangel” (who was not really Saint Michael the Archangel but was really the demon Moloch posing as the Archangel Michael in an effort to fool the megalomaniacal would-be Deutero-Czar Peter the Great aka Putin).
Kwan Yin the immortal princess (venerated as the Goddess of Mercy in some sects of Buddhism) and her descendant the South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan were keeping tags on Xi in Astana and would be following him to Moscow for his meeting with Putin.
Xi was now attending a state banquet in his honour with Kazakh government leaders in Astana.
Before Xi sat down at the banquet table, a small robotic Paddington Bear (called Paddy O’ Marmalade), who had been invented by Set Enterprises’ scientist Dr. Marmalade Montague, put a combination of honey, marmalade and Crazy Glue down on Xi’s chair.
When Xi sat down, he got hopelessly stuck and couldn’t get up again.
As members of the Kazakh honour guard struggled to get Xi free from the chair that his pants were hopelessly glued to, the Paddington Bear robot named Paddy O’ Marmalade came and threw a Peking Duck and Thousand Year Old Egg laced cream pie in his face.
The cream pie had been specially prepared and baked by Harvey Tallbanger the 6 foot 8 tall invisible Welsh pooka bunny rabbit who worked as a secret agent for Set Enterprises.
Between his butt stuck to the chair and his face covered in Peking Duck and Thousand Year Old Egg cream pie, Xi did not really look like a great leader.
It was at that moment that the ghost of Winston Churchill (representing the British government) presented Xi with a Winnie the Pooh t-shirt.
Of course Xi could not put it on because of his current predicament.
Just then a holographic image of British MP Renfield R. Renfield appeared and started to sing to the tune of the Beatles song Hey Jude:
“Hey Xi, don’t ask me why
Take a sad song and make it badder
Remember vaccines get under your skin
Changing your DNA
Until you become Transhuman, human, human, human, human,…”
Renfield was broadcasting from the living room of the Set Estate mansion in London, England.
In the background could be heard the sound of Amadeus Emanon opening the door to pick up the Chinese Food delivery they had ordered from a Chinese restaurant.
“Hey Amadeus,” Renfield piped up, “Ask the delivery guy how do you say “Xi Jinping, you are a total loser” in Chinese?”.
Amadeus asked.
And the Chinese Food delivery guy answered adding and ad libbing a few nasty pejoratives of his own.
Renfield spoke in perfect Mandarin (with some Cantonese thrown in for good measure) telling Xi that he was a total loser and throwing in the delivery guy’s added ad libbed nasty pejoratives of his own.
Xi was livid with rage although you couldn’t tell because his face was covered in Peking Duck and Thousand Year Old Egg cream pie while his bottom was still being pulled away from the butt locking combination of honey, marmalade and Crazy Glue on his chair.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday September 14th
2022.
Baal In Kazakhstan
The demon Baal in Kazakhstan
The ghost of Cecil B. DeMille had taken a technicolour photo of the demon Baal in Kazakhstan.
The demon Baal was the object of veneration and worship at a human sacrifice ceremony at a site just north of the Kazakh capital of Astana (now called Nur-Sultan).
Due to his bum knee, Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) was unable to attend the ceremony in hopes of improving ecumenical relations with all religions and all deities.
A backdrop choreographer for the U.S. Democratic Party was present to get ideas for Joe Biden’s next major speech.
He was the same choreographer who had done the Nazi colours blood red backdrop for Biden’s speech in Philadelphia back on September 1st of this year 2022.
Samhain Cardinal Salaman was a member of the Vatican entourage accompanying Francis to this Inter-Faith Summit in Astana.
Cardinal Salaman was examining the Cecil B. DeMille technicolour photograph alongside South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan.
Hyung had spent the day locating evil vampires and vampiresses (who were attending the summit) in their coffins and beheading them and staking them through the heart.
She was to vampires and vampiresses what the Covid-19 vaccines were to previously healthy and strong young athletes (they were all dropping dead on the spot as a result).
“So,” Samhain Cardinal Salaman sipped his tea, “I understand you’re a direct descendant of the immortal princess Kwan Yin.”
“That is correct,” Hyung nodded.
“And she’s venerated as the goddess of mercy by various branches of Buddhism,” the Cardinal helped himself to a mooncake.
“Yes, that’s true,” Hyung said, “My ancestress is immortal (having drunk from springs of immortality from a certain mountain in a certain valley in China) but she doesn’t consider herself a goddess although others do.”
“As opposed to George Soros, Bill Gates and Klaus Schwab who all consider themselves gods even though others don’t,” Samhain mused aloud.
“Yes, very true,” Hyung poured more tea.
“You know I know nothing whatsoever about most religions except a smattering of some knowledge of kabbalah,” Cardinal Salaman explained, “Which is why Pope Francis had me baptised, then confirmed, then ordained a deacon, then ordained a priest, then consecrated a bishop and then created a Cardinal all on the same day.”
“I see,” Hyung smiled at the admission.
“So, tell me,” the Cardinal once again took a close look at the ghost of Cecil B. DeMille’s technicolour photograph of the demon Baal, “Are Baal and Moloch one and the same god?”.
“Many theologians and professors of Classical Middle Eastern History seem to think so,” the scholarly vampire huntress answered, “but in fact Baal and Moloch are demonic twin brothers.”
“There are twins among demons?” Cardinal Salaman was surprised.
“A few, yes,” Hyung nodded.
“So, is Moloch in Kazakhstan as well?” The Cardinal inquired.
“No, he’s in Moscow serving as an advisor to Russian President Vladimir Putin,” the vampire huntress answered.
“Really?” Salaman helped himself to another mooncake.
“Although Moloch is posing as the Archangel Michael to Putin,” Hyung explained, “so Putin thinks he was following Saint Michael the Archangel’s advice when he invaded Ukraine in February to capture the capital of Kyiv and then the rest of Ukraine ”
“Now I may not know too much religion especially Catholicism,” The Cardinal took another sip of tea, “but I do know that Saint Michael the Archangel is considered one of the Patron Saints of the City of Kyiv. Did Putin really think that Michael would ask him to invade and conquer a city of which he’s a Patron Saint?”.
“Well, I don’t think Putin really knows much about Ukrainian history and culture and tradition,” Hyung answered.
“In that he’s a lot like the late Soviet dictator Josef Stalin,” Salaman noted.
“In fairness to Putin,” Hyung pointed out, “He only followed Moloch because Moloch was posing as Saint Michael the Archangel. Whereas Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden and most U.S. Democrats follow the demons Baal and Baphomet even though Baal and Baphomet are appearing as themselves Baal and Baphomet.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday September 13th
2022.
Hyung Grace Kwan En Route To Astana Kazakhstan
South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan lops off the heads of vampires in practice and preparation for this week’s Inter-Faith Congress of Religious Leaders in Astana Kazakhstan (a city now called Nur-Sultan because current Kazakh leaders have bad taste as do most leaders in the world today).
The satanic AntiPope Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) would be attending the Inter-Faith Congress.
So probably no prayers would be said in Latin.
In addition to various religious leaders attending the Congress, there would be numerous vampires and vampiresses attending.
Most pre-eminent among them would be the ancient Egyptian vampire Osiris (worshipped as a deity by the Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite of Freemasonry), the ancient Egyptian vampiress Isis (worshipped as a deity by the Grand Orient Lodge of France- the only Masonic lodge in the world that allows women to be members) and their son the ancient Egyptian vampire Horus (also worshipped as a deity by the Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite of Freemasonry).
Also attending the Congress would be the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith who owns a great estate just north of the Kazakh capital.
Allatallahbel the Vampiress-Priestess of Baal (who briefly took possession of the Vatican for a few years beginning on October 13th 2017) would also be attending.
As would Pachamama (the dragon woman shapeshifting demon goddess of the Incas) and the Spirit Great-Grandmother of the West invoked by a Huron shaman in Quebec City, Canada at the request of Pope Francis.
The demons Baal, Baphomet, Mammon and Mephistopheles would also be attending.
After wiping her sword clean, Hyung listened to British MP Renfield R. Renfield’s podcast.
Renfield was commenting on the amount of witchcraft and sorcery being practiced in the world today.
He noted that the Spirit Great-Grandmother of the West was invoked in Canada on July 28th and the demon bull god Baal was quite literally worshipped at the opening ceremonies of the 2022 Commonwealth Games in Birmingham, England on the same date.
Then Renfield noted that within a month and a half of those two satanic pagan rituals, the Head of State of both countries (Canada and the United Kingdom) would pass away.
Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.
“Sadly her son Prince Charles now King Charles III is more amiable to the Great Reset agenda of the World Economic Forum,” Renfield explained, “Let us hope and pray that he’ll come to his senses before it’s too late.”
“Amen,” said Hyung.
-A vampire novel chapter
Written by Christopher
Monday September 12th
2022.
Friday The 13th May Style
Actress Gene Tierney in the 1945 movie Leave Her To Heaven
But not everyone can be left to Heaven.
For example the late Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg who’s busy roasting away on her rotating barbeque spit down in Tartarus.
She has just been informed that she’s being sent down to a lower and even more sizzling temperature level.
“But, honestly,” Ruth protested, “I DIDN’T send them.”
. . .
Bill Gates was once again involved in another spastic action involving his hands.
As he was busy giving his one man impersonation of Cthulhu with his many arms, the demons Baal and Baphomet appeared to him.
“The WHO (World Health Organization) of which you and the Chinese Communist Party are the principal shareholders will soon be setting up the first One World Government in history if senile old fool Joe Biden manages to win the vote for signing the Pandemic Treaty that surrenders U.S. Nationl Sovereignty on national health care over to the WHO by May 22nd.”
The two demons and one spastic human cackle ominously.
. . .
Satanic AntiPope Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) spent today May 13th (The Feast Day of Our Lady of Fatima) praying in front of an idol of Pachamama.
The six Vampiric Knights-Templar (the only Knights-Templar to have survived French King Philip The Fair’s attack on the Knights Templar Order in France that happened on Friday the 13th October 1307) who had been staying in the Vatican since October 13th 2017 marked the day by throwing a statue of Our Lady of Fatima into the Tiber.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday May 13th
2022.
October Apocalypse Now?
A pair of sports reporters were broadcasting a boxing match in an outside boxing arena on a ranch outside the town of Shelby Montana.
The promoter was hoping the event would be a lot more successful than the Jack Dempsey vs. Tommy Gibbons World Heavyweight Title Bout that was held on July 4th 1923 in Shelby Montana.
The large crowd that had come to watch the event were shouting “F*ck Joe Biden!” “F*ck Joe BIDEN!”.
“Listen to that crowd,” one of the sports reporters lisped in a Howard Cosell like fashion if Howard Cosell had been a pansy, “They’re shouting “Let’s go Brandon! Let’s go Brandon!”. How about that for enthusiasm?”.
“But there’s no one named Brandon involved in this fight, sir,” the cowboy sports reporter (who talked like John Wayne) pointed out.
The other reporter who carried a pink six shooter took it out of his holster and shot the cowboy sports reporter dead.
“I’m afraid I’m going to have to cancel you permanently in today’s cancel culture world for making such an offensive racist misogynistic homophobic remark,” the limpwristed gunslinger lisped.
. . .
Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster had a vision of what occurred during the Saturday October 9th 2021 Vatican meeting between Pope Francis and U.S. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi that hadn’t been shown by the mainstream media.
After Pope Francis had greeted Nancy Pelosi with a Freemasonic secret handshake, the two then danced together.
Pope Francis sang in an extremely bad impersonation of Yul Brynner’s voice,
“We’ve just been introduced,
I do not know you well,
But when the music started
Something drew me to your side…
… shall we dance?
Pelosi and Bergoglio are then joined by the demons Baal and Baphomet who are also dancing together.
Baal and Baphomet then cover Nancy and Francis with confetti that looks surprisingly like small unborn human babies.
Nancy and Francis then throw the baby like confetti into the brazier hands of a metallic statue of Moloch (who was the demon Baal’s demonic twin brother).
The brazier hands then insert the baby confetti into the fiery furnace stomach of the bull headed deity Moloch.
Pelosi and Francis then start singing Burn Baby Burn from the 1977 John Travolta film Saturday Night Fever.
They are joined by holographic images of Bill Gates and George Soros wearing human embryonic made revitalizing skin cream singing “Stayin’ Alive” another song from the 1977 film Saturday Night Fever.
. . .
British MP Renfield R. Renfield had just returned from Australia where he had thrown 666 members of the Victoria State Police Force to their deaths from a cannabis powered dirigible airship (The Wild Colonial Boy) over the City of Melbourne.
Prior to their aerial downward exit, Renfield had arranged to have 666 middle fingers cut off the Neo-SS Neo-Gestapo Fascist pigs’ left hands and mailed to Victoria State’s Neo-Maoist Neo-Stalinist tyrant Premier Daniel Andrews.
Also prior to their aerial downward exit, Renfield had arranged to have 666 middle fingers cut off the Neo-SS Neo-Gestapo Fascist pigs’ right hands and mailed to Victoria state’s Neo-Fascist Chief Commissioner of Victoria Police Shane Patton.
Renfield was now examining a brochure.
The brochure was advertising the ELITE GLOBAL LEADERS’ CONFERENCE being held on Saturday October 23rd 2021 at the Vatican.
The theme of the conference was TECHNOLOGY That Empowers HUMANITY.
The conference was by invitation only.
The keynote presentation was called The Code- Programming Our Future For Good.
The keynote speakers were David Fergusson author of The transHuman Code and Carlos Moreira author of The transHuman Code.
As Renfield was reading the brochure, a commotion was taking place outside on the Set Estate grounds.
The Victoria State Police Force from Melbourne Australia were launching a commando raid on the Set Mansion in order to kidnap Renfield.
As such they were being pounced upon by the Set Estate’s ferocious guard cat Nefertiti Galore and were being ripped and shredded to pieces by her.
Nefertiti Galore: As can be seen, she’s in one of her better moods this evening.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday October 12th
2021.
Asmodeus Discusses Latin Tridentine Mass With Nimrod
The chain smoking cigarette smoking demon Asmodeus was sitting in a Rome restaurant having spaghetti and meatballs with the little green frog Nimrod.
“Why is Pope Francis trying to get rid of the Latin Tridentine Mass?” Asked Nimrod.
“Because it’s preventing the advent of the Antichrist,” Asmodeus answered.
“It is?” Nimrod stuck his tongue out to capture a fly.
“Yes, His Satanic Majesty has been puzzled as to what is preventing the advent of the Antichrist,” Asmodeus explained, “He thought he hit the big time with Napoleon. He didn’t. He thought he hit the big time with Lenin. He didn’t. He thought he hit the big time with Hitler. He didn’t. He thought he hit the big time with Stalin. He didn’t. So he decided to name an infernal committee made up of Baal, Baphomet and Pachamama the Inca she-dragon who’s also the Inca earth mother goddess to investigate the matter shortly after Stalin kicked the bucket. The committee came up with the idea that it was the Latin Tridentine Mass that was preventing the Advent of the Antichrist. So His Satanic Majesty caught Pope John XXIII off guard one day and whispered in his ear to call the 2nd Vatican Council. Which Good Pope John did. John died within a year after the Council opened and Cardinal Montini was elected Pope taking the name Paul VI. A few of Paul’s advisors were under the complete control of His Satanic Majesty. After the Council finished in December 1965, Paul named the Freemason Annibale Bugnini to compose a new liturgy for the Church. Bugnini came out with the Novus Ordo Mass (designed to bring about the New World Order) which Paul VI promulgated in 1969 and the new liturgy was said in most parish churches throughout the world beginning in 1970. Except for French Archbishop Marcel Lefebvbre and the Society of Saint Pius X. The next decades saw the advent of the two Bushes and Bill Clinton who helped push the New World Order on America and the world. It continued under the Marxist Saul Alinsky inspired community organizer Barack Obama. Donald Trump was too much of a narcissist to follow the dictates of the New World Order elite so he had to be pushed out of the way. Pope Francis brought an idol of the demon Pachamama into the Vatican Gardens and later into Saint Peter’s Basilica itself. The result of that was to inspire the supernatural forces to bring about the release of Covid-19. All churches were shut down because of Covid. Within the Catholic Church the only groups who remained open without wearing masks and social distancing were those that practiced the Latin Tridentine Mass- the Society of Saint Pius X, the Fraternal Society of Saint Peter and the Institute of Christ The King Sovereign Priest. The Antichrist was supposed to arrive in 2020. But thanks to the Latin Tridentine Mass being said, he didn’t. So His Satanic Majesty (who’s Pope Francis’ god of surprises) directed his gay maidservant Francis to effectively abolish the Latin Tridentine Mass in his most recent motu proprio Traditionis custodes. Now His Satanic Majesty hopes the Antichrist will arrive within the next year.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday July 19th
2021.
Baal and Baphomet Attend G-7 Summit In Cornwall
Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was sitting in his lobster tank at Set Enterprises in London and having a vision of what was happening behind the scenes at this year’s G-7 Summit in Cornwall.
He saw that the demons Baal and Baphomet were attending the summit at Carbis Bay, Cornwall and were in fact the entities responsible for writing Joe Biden’s Build Back Better global plan that the U.S. President was presenting to his fellow G-7 leaders as his plan to save the world.
The Baal and Baphomet Build Back Better plan was greeted with enthusiasm by Canada’s brainless Justin Trudeau.
The Egyptian crocodile god Sobek also briefly appeared during the summit to shed crocodile tears over the fact that this was German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s last G-7 summit since she’d be stepping down as Germany’s Chancellor later this year.
After the day’s proceedings were over, French President Emmanuel Macron walked the streets of Carbis Bay in search of cougars.
Finding none, the French President then wondered about Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.
Which is why the Queen was presented with a sword in order to cut the G-7 cake in case Macron approached her asking for a piece.
Italy’s Prime Minister Mario Draghi made inquiry of the demons Baal and Baphomet as to Judas Iscariot’s good health on behalf of Pope Francis.
Japanese Prime Minister Yoshihide Suga was surprised to see Steak and Kidney Sushi on the menu at the Carbis Bay Hotel.
The summit host British Prime Minister Boris Johnson got a few pieces of the Steak and Kidney Sushi entangled in his hair.
And with that, Michelangelo turned off the lights in his lobster tank and went to sleep.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday June 12th
2021.
Demon Moloch Addresses His Disciples In BBC Newsroom
Rebel News Canada one of the few independent and non-Marxist news media outlets in Canada visited the office building home of Dominion Voting (the vote tabulation company whose vote tabulation machines in key battleground states suddenly flipped thousands and thousands and thousands of votes from Donald Trump to Joe Biden at the last minute on election night Tuesday November 3rd) at 215 Spadina Avenue in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.
They were shocked to discover that Dominion Voting actually shares an office floor with the Tides Foundation.
Tides which recently changed its name to Make Way is an extreme left eco-radical charity that is financed by George Soros.
When the Rebel News camera crew were inside the Dominion Voting Building at 215 Spadina Avenue in Toronto, they were removed from the building by the building manager.
Before they were removed by the building manager for committing the heinous offense of journalism (a heinous offense that the mainstream Marxist media has never been guilty of the past 20 years) they discovered that Tides and Dominion had requested the building manager remove all signage and references to their shared building occupancy.
Rebel News in its investigation had discovered documents that Dominion Voting had donated almost $50,000 to Hillary Clinton’s personal foundation.
Of course only independent news media outlets such as Rebel News would bother investigating and reporting on this.
For the mainstream Marxist media news outlets believe in lies and not the truth.
. . .
Ghost of Joseph Stalin: “My spirit has effectively taken over the BBC (which now stands for British Bolshevik Corporation).
My former ally and erstwhile enemy Winnie (Winston Churchill) must be spinning in his grave.
They the BBC have definitely become the Ministry of Truth of Orwell’s 1984.”
As Stalin enjoyed himself pontificating while sitting at the desk of the late BBC comedian Jimmy Savile, the demon Moloch was standing (maskless of course since he was a global overlord of the plant) in the middle of the BBC newsroom giving a pep talk to his many disciples among the reporters and news editors of BBC World News.
Moloch (injesting a plateload of human babies): Thank you for your splendid efforts on my behalf and on behalf of my many allies.
As you know the British public and the public of the world are gullible sheep.
They think an organization which knew about and did nothing and in many cases covered up for BBC actors and stars who were guilty of rape, pedophilia and necrophilia, they think an organization such as this is actually going to tell the truth about Covid-19 and also tell the truth about who actually won the U.S. Presidential election.
Moloch then starts to cackle and laugh uproariously.
His disciples among the reporters and news editors of BBC news, soon join in on the demonic and satanic laughter and cackling, sounding equally demonic and satanic in their cackling and laughter.
. . .
British MP Renfield R. Renfield reading the news on his own independent non-Marxist news podcast:
The Vatican is turning its Social Media Department of Pope Francis Instagram, Twitter and Facebook Account Staff writers upside down in an effort to find the heterosexual male in the department who dared to Like in Francis’ name a female lingerie model on Instagram.
Such things are Verboten in Pope Francis’ Vatican.
You can like a Burt Reynolds Cosmopolitan Centrefold picture but not a photo of a female lingerie model.
Natalia Garibotto, 27, the Brazilian lingerie model whose Instagram photo of her wearing a tartan schoolgirl skirt, stockings and suspenders was apparently “liked” by Pope Francis on his Instagram account.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday November 18th
2020.
San Diego Bishop Has Demons and Communist Ghosts On His Front Lawn
Robert McElroy the brainless Catholic bishop of San Diego California was standing on his front lawn and shooting the breeze with the demons Baal and Baphomet as well as the ghosts of Lenin, Stalin and Mao Tse-tung.
Which was probably a dangerous thing to be doing.
Recently Mark J. Seitz the brainless Catholic bishop of El Paso Texas had likewise been standing on his front lawn and shooting the breeze with the demons Baal and Baphomet as well as the ghosts of Lenin, Stalin and Mao Tse-tung.
Days later he came down with the Covid-19 virus.
Comparing recipes for a 1000-year-old laid egg (also known as the U.S. Democratic Party Platform) with the late Chairman Mao was no guarantee this would make one immune to the CCP Wuhan virus.
Already Bishop McElroy could be seen coughing and sputtering and standing behind him was Thanatos Thanatotheristes Reaper of Death who was the patron demon of Covid-19.
Thanatos Thanatotheristes had the body of a giant mammalian bat but the head of a Thanatotheristes (which was a type of T-Rex).
Later the demon Baphomet had an interview with CNN’s Anderson Cooper (an interview that CNN producers decided not to show on television).
Cooper informed Baphomet, “I understand your half-brother is currently visiting America.”
“What?” Baphomet spit out his vegan soup, “What’s he doing here?”.
Meanwhile in the town of Sleepy Hollow New York, Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was taking a walk with the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow to look at the autumn colours.
“I think I’d like to stay in Sleepy Hollow until Halloween,” Friedrich Wotan Wiesbaden the Headless Horseman remarked through his Great Pumpkin jack o’ lantern head, “Things can get pretty exciting in Sleepy Hollow on Halloween.”
“Well seeing as how you and I and your horse Bucephalus Reborn and my pterodactyl Hovering Voyeurius Over Raquelis Welchius are the only guests who seem to be staying in Sleepy Hollow’s Rip Van Winkle Inn at the moment, I’m sure we can keep our rooms over until Halloween.”
“You’re right,” the Headless Horseman grinned 🎃, “Let’s go tell the innkeeper.”
Back at the inn, the innkeeper (who at one time in his life had been the proprieter of the Hotel California) was examining the Mercedes Benz car that had just pulled up driven by a lovely and beautiful witch.
“What did you say your name was again?” The innkeeper inquired.
“Tiffany Twisted,” the drop dead gorgeous witch smiled.
“Haven’t we met before?” The innkeeper blinked.
She smiled her white ivories at him, “Some dance to remember. Some dance to forget.”
She took the keys to her room which would be across from Yaldabaoth’s.
She walked up the inn stairs in her short black skirt and sexy black silk nylons.
Then she turned around and smiled at the innkeeper, “You obviously danced to forget.”
She continued up the stairs while the innkeeper scratched his head and continued to wonder where he had seen her before.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday October 14th
2020.
Moloch Remembers A Disciple While Justin Wants To Cancel Thanksgiving
The demon Moloch (invisible to most except those wearing Dr. Cadbury Rocher Polaroid sunglasses but there weren’t many of those) stood on the steps of the U.S. Capitol as a funeral service was being held for one of his favourite disciples who had kicked the bucket last Friday.
Unfortunately Moloch’s brother Baal and his demonic partner in crime Baphomet were unable to find a young virgin vampiress in time and rip out the vampiress’ heart and burn her body so that Moloch’s and their disciple might live a while longer.
A sacrifice of the Inca vampiress Huchuysisa back in January of this year had allowed Moloch’s disciple to live another 9 moths.
Unfortunately a couple of days later the Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing and the ghost of Orson Welles had poured Dr. Cadbury Rocher’s Phoenix Rising Vampiress Resurrection Elixir all over Huchuysisa’s ashes and brought her back from the dead.
Moloch’s disciple had to be hospitalized a few months later after seeing Australian performer Uncle Ernie perform his Marlene Dietrich dance routine in the associate Supreme Court Justice’s private washroom cubicle.
She had to be hospitalized again a few weeks after that after watching a viral video of Uncle Ernie performing the same dance routine when she accidentally typed in the wrong url on her laptop.
Then last Friday after seeing a holographic image (projected by Set Enterprises drones) of Uncle Ernie doing his most unkosher impersonation ever of Sesame Street’s Miss Piggy, Moloch’s disciple had finally given up the ghost.
She had lain in state first in the Supreme Court building and later in the halls of Congress.
Moloch wondered whether he’d ever again find such a devoted disciple.
. . .
Earlier this week in an address to the Canadian nation, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau told Canadians that due to the Chinese Communist Party Wuhan virus (although he used the WHO politically correct term Covid-19), “It’s all too likely we won’t be gathering for Thanksgiving but we still have a shot at Christmas.”
Canadian Thanksgiving is celebrated on the 2nd Monday in October (whereas in the U.S it is celebrated on the last Thursday in November).
Later in a meeting with his supernatural advisor Tezcatlipoca the Aztec god of smoking mirrors (whom he communicated with via a marijuana pot smoking late Victorian/early Edwardian antique mirror called Magical Mystery Tour), Justin was shocked to discover that he didn’t have the jurisdictional power to cancel Thanksgiving.
Tears started running down his Al Jolson minstral show blackface, “I suppose I don’t have the jurisdictional power to cancel Christmas either.”
Being the good Marxist that he was, Justin didn’t believe in people having fun.
He was first planning to cancel Thanksgiving in October and then Christmas in December.
His plans of being a Maoist grinch had come to nought.
How Justin wished he was Daniel Andrews the Premier of Victoria state in Australia and then he could do whatever the Hell he wanted.
The Global TV News Canada disinformation branch of the New World Order Ministry of Propoganda had finished their 5:30 PM Evening broadcast tonight (after their usual regurgitation of hardcore Marxism in the broadcast exemplified by Communist asshole Global correspondent in the U.S. Jackson Proskow’s Marxist-Leninist slant on American politics) by longing for a Daniel Andrews style lockdown in Canada.
How many of the Canadian sheeple baaaaed appreciatively at Dawna Friesen’s departing pronouncement remains to be seen.
. . .
The Inca vampiress Huchuysisa (on vacation in the Bahamas) was happy she managed to evade capture and being sacrificed by the demons Baal and Baphomet again in order that Moloch’s most devoted disciple on the U.S. Supreme Court might live.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 25th
2020.
Dracul Van Helsing 
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