The Portrait of Dorian Gray’s Teddy Bear

December 9, 2019 at 11:07 pm (Art, Arts, Culture, Literature, Mystery, painting, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The Portrait of Dorian Gray’s Teddy Bear 

Dashwood Forrest the owner of The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery had spent the day visiting a London Christmas Market.

On his way home, he had visited a small antique store where he noticed a rather old painting of a child’s teddy bear.

Intrigued by the painting, Forrest had bought the painting for £20 and brought it back to his gallery with him.

He gave the painting a cleaning and noticed the name of the artist- Basil Hallward.

The same artist who had painted the original portrait of Dorian Gray that Forrest had purchased at an estate sale back in October of 2012.

Prior to purchasing that painting, Forrest had just believed that the artist Basil Hallward was a fictional character and the famous portrait of Dorian Gray had been a figment of Oscar Wilde’s imagination.

Back on September 3rd of this year, the figure of Dorian Gray had disappeared from the painting when Hurricane Dorian had struck the Caribbean.

Only to return when the storm finally faded into oblivion.

And now here was a portrait of a teddy bear done by the same man who had painted a portrait of Dorian Gray.

Forrest noticed the year below Basil Hallward’s name -1860- the same year he had painted the picture of Dorian Gray.

Forrest decided to take the frame off and check the back of the canvas of the painting.

There on the back of the canvas of the painting were the words Portrait of Dorian Gray’s Toy Bear- painted 1860.

So Dorian Gray had owned a teddy bear before teddy bears became popular (teddy bears had emerged as a phenomenon back in the early 1900s and the toy bears had in fact been named after Teddy Roosevelt who was the U.S. President of the day).

Forrest went to the secluded room in the gallery where he kept the picture of Dorian Gray.

He hung the portrait of Dorian Gray’s teddy bear next to Gray’s portrait.

He then put the velvet curtains up again in front of both paintings, turned off the lights and closed the door.

Had he stayed in the room a few minutes longer, he’d have noticed the figure of Dorian Gray’s teddy bear in the portrait had gone missing.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday December 9th
2019.

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The Jeffraken Rises In The Sea of Galilee

September 4, 2019 at 11:04 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, Horror, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mystery/horror, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

The Jeffraken Rises In The Sea of Galilee 

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was smoking a cigar and drinking brandy and eating tuna fish sandwiches in his office and trying to think up hundreds of amendments to give to pro-Brexit peers in the House of Lords in order to delay passage of the bill forbidding a no-deal Brexit until Parliament was suspended next week.

Among the amendments Renfield had come up with for the bill was a demand that the EU should change the European Union anthem from the tune and lyrics of Beethoven’s Song of Joy to the tune and lyrics of the Monty Python’s Flying Circus song How Sweet To Be An Idiot.

Another amendment was a demand that the EU must pay for Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn’s gender reassignment surgery in Sweden and also donate a portion of the European Union’s Research and Development Budget to allocate funds to see if it was scientifically possible for Jeremy Corbyn to grow himself a pair of testicles.

. . .

Peter Whitstable the man they call the Fox Mulder of Interpol was walking along the shores of the Sea of Galilee.

For the past few days, there were reports of the sighting of a Kraken rising from the Sea of Galilee.

Whitstable had heard it on good authority (from the Greek sea god Poseidon no less) that Zeus had recently ordered his Kraken to be released upon the world.

Whitstable was walking the shores of Galilee to see if this was Zeus’ kraken who was rising from the depths of the Sea of Galilee.

Suddenly there were huge screams coming from along the shores.

Whitstable looked and up rose from the waters a giant kraken with 8 huge gigantic legs covered in huge gigantic tentacles.

Even more terrifying was the head of the kraken.

For the head was not an octopus head.

Rather it was the head of the supposedly dead perverted billionaire financier and possible Mossad operative Jeffrey Epstein.

The Jeffraken had risen from the depths of the Sea of Galilee.

. . .

Dashwood Forrest was getting a visit from the ghost of the 18th Century Irish pirate of the Caribbean Captain Kerry Donegal.

Donegal was carrying news from Persephone the Greek goddess Queen of the Underworld.

Persephone was feeling guilty over something her husband Hades had done.

Hades had recently released from the realm of the dead the ghost of Captain Rainbow Beard the most infamous and bloodthirsty pirate ever to sail the 7 Seas.

Captain Rainbow Beard made the pirate Blackbeard and the notorious wife murderer Bluebeard look like Boy Scouts by comparison.

Captain Rainbow Beard was a devout worshipper of the demons Baal and Baphomet.

His human sacrifices and degenerate perverted orgies were the stuff of pirate lore.

Today he’d probably be considered the leading candidate for the U.S. Democratic Party Presidential nomination in 2020 to run against Donald Trump the personal and favoured choice of the demons Mammon and Mephistopheles.

Apparently Captain Rainbow Beard was still bitter about the only defeat he had ever suffered as a pirate- the Battle of the Bahamas.

A battle which would turn out to be Captain Rainbow Beard’s last- for he was killed in that battle.

Rainbow Beard’s opponents in that battle were Captain Kerry Donegal himself and the 18th Century Scottish Jacobite Pirate Queen Sonja Henderson (who was turned into a vampiress shortly after that battle).

All the while he was roasting away on his spit in Tartarus (as his rear end was sodomized by a goat), Captain Rainbow Beard swore vengeance on the Bahamas- the area of the world where he was defeated and killed.

One day the god Hades was walking by and challenged him to a poker game.

Hades lost.

The price for losing was that Rainbow Beard was freed from his spit (and his rear end was freed from the goat) and someday the pirate would be allowed to leave the Underworld for the world above.

When Rainbow Beard heard news of the storm Dorian forming in the Atlantic off the coast of Africa and the possibility it might become a hurricane, the insidious pirate set off in search of the notorious Victorian era libertine Dorian Gray (whom Oscar Wilde had once written a book about) that he had once encountered in the flames of Tartarus.

Rainbow Beard gave Gray some Hellish hashish (which would make him more susceptible to the pirate’s hypnotic powers of suggestion) and also fed him some of the Philistine giant Goliath’s blood making him rapidly increase in stature and height.

Rainbow Beard then went to see Hades and the infernal deity granted the pirate and Dorian Gray permission to leave the Underworld.

Rainbow Beard got the now giant Dorian Gray to enter the eye of the storm of Hurricane Dorian and cause massive chaos and havoc when it hit the Bahamas- site of Captain Rainbow Beard’s massive defeat centuries earlier.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday September 4th
2019.

The 18th Century Scottish Jacobite Pirate Queen Sonja Henderson now a vampiress

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Dashwood Forrest, The Empty Portrait and Hurricane Dorian

September 3, 2019 at 11:01 pm (Aesthetics, Art, Arts, Fantasy, Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Gothic, Gothic romance, History, Horror, International Intrigue, magic, Mystery, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Philosophy, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Dashwood Forrest, The Empty Portrait and Hurricane Dorian

Dashwood Forrest sat in his office in his art gallery in London and quietly sipped a drink of absinthe.

The Green Fairy as it was called was one of the favourite drinks of his idol the writer, novelist, poet and playwright Oscar Wilde.

Forrest’s living dead Irish manservant Mulligan the Irish zombie (who had been brought back from the dead many years ago by South African witch doctor Dr. Sterling Makabo) was out for the evening.

Mulligan had been hired for the evening by British MP Renfield R. Renfield to haunt the residence of British Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn and stand outside the back entrance of Corbyn’s lodgings and say in a spookily haunting zombie voice (with an Irish lilt to it), “The Irish backstop ends at your back door, Mr. Corbyn. The Irish backstop ends at your backdoor.”

As Jeremy Corbyn began to suffer the worst nightmares of his life, Forrest finished his glass of absinthe, left his office and locked it.

He walked down to the end of the gallery where he entered a room marked PRIVATE.

No one (not even Mulligan the Irish zombie) ever entered that room.

Only he Dashwood Forrest art historian, art gallery curator and extraordinary gentleman of many talents ever entered that room.

For that room contained a portrait behind purple velvet curtains.

A portrait of a man.

A portrait of a man painted in the year 1860.

A portrait that was first mentioned in a book published in July 1890.

A book that most people (and even Dashwood Forrest himself for most of his life) had considered a work of fiction.

Until Forrest came across the painting in an estate sale back in October of 2012.

The picture was of a man named… Dorian Gray.

And the artist who signed the picture was named Basil Hallward.

The painting was of an extremely handsome young man in his early 20s.

Exactly as described in Oscar Wilde’s famous Gothic Philosophical novel of the 19th Century- The Picture of Dorian Gray.

Forrest drew back the purple velvet curtains that covered the painting and hid it from view.

Forrest got the shock of his life when he saw the portrait was empty.

There was no subject in the painting.

Dorian Gray was gone.

. . .

Forrest stared blankly at the blank canvas and blinked.

His smart phone went off.

It was a text message from his friend Amadeus Emanon.

A Set Enterprises satellite over the Bahamas had photographed the eye of the storm of Hurricane Dorian.

And a giant mysterious almost human figure seemed to be standing and moving with the eye of the storm in the hurricane.

Forrest again blinked.

For the figure was the spitting image of Dorian Gray.

The figure now missing from the painting.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher 
Tuesday September 3rd
2019.


Sibyl: She loved Dorian in vain.

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Haiku About The Portrait of Dorian Gray

August 27, 2017 at 7:06 pm (Art, Arts, Literature, Poetry) (, , , , , )

Haiku About The Portrait of Dorian Gray

Portrait figure old
its subject eternal youth
free from sin’s karma

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Amadeus’ Ode To Dorian Gray: A Poem

January 22, 2016 at 8:41 pm (Art, Horror, Literature, Mystery, Mystery/horror, Poetry, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Amadeus’ Ode To Dorian Gray

After his evening of drinking a dozen bottles of absinthe, Amadeus Emanon wrote the following ode to Dorian Gray:

Dorian in the picture gazing down at me,
Dorian in the picture what exactly do you see?
Dorian in the picture- you’re a Hellful spectral sight
you’re not the same as that handsome youth of night
who wanders London streets never aging in my sight.

Dorian in the picture what dark deeds have you done?
Dorian in the picture, to Satan your soul’s been won?
Murder and betrayal has become your deadly bread
if this portrait is destroyed, will you wind up dead?

Dorian in the picture, are you lot like me?
If my soul like yours was revealed for all the world to see
would I stop what I was doing for the rest of Eternity?

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday January 22nd
2016.

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Haiku About Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray

February 5, 2014 at 7:30 pm (Commentary, Literature, Poetry) (, , , , , )

Haiku About Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray

He forever young
walks streets while portrait decays
scapegoat for his sins

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