Asmodeus, Bill de Blasio, Gal Gadot, Pachamama, Nimrod and The Miraculous Crucifix

April 2, 2020 at 10:58 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Asmodeus, Bill de Blasio, Gal Gadot, Pachamama, Nimrod and The Miraculous Crucifix

New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio (like all Marxist totalitarian despots in waiting outside Communist China and North Korea) was trying his hardest to use the Coronavirus pandemic to shut down religious centres of worship like churches and synagogues permanently.

He had announced last Friday that not only would those places of worship in New York City that remained open and ignored social distancing be fined but they may be closed permanently.

Mainland Chinese leader Xi Jinping and the ghosts of Josef Stalin and Mao Tse-tung (roasting away on their respective spits down in Tartarus) heartedly approved of Mayor Bill de Blasio’s announcement.

As Mayor Bill left his home today, he was surprised to get a cream pie thrown in his face by an invisible entity.

Meanwhile Gal Gadot who was wondering whether as a celebrity she was subject to the same home isolation rules as those of the common masses was putting her make-up on.

She had recently led a “star” studded cast of celebrity airheads and freaks in singing John Lennon’s song Imagine.

One little girl (whose grandmother had just died from the Coronavirus that morning) started bawling when she saw a TV news clip of Gal Gadot singing “Imagine there’s no Heaven…”

A short time later as Gal Gadot was once again filming and recording herself on social media, a cream pie was thrown in her face by an invisible entity.

“She doesn’t look so wonderful now,” Amadeus Emanon skyped to his friend British MP Renfield R. Renfield.

. . .

The U.S. Navy destroyer the U.S.S. Spiro Agnew was sailing in the Caribbean Sea.

Ostensibly as part of a fleet of warships to stop the smuggling of illegal drugs.

Although there were some aboard the ship who wondered if it wasn’t to prepare for a U.S. military invasion of Venezuela.

That Trump might cave in to the American Deep State’s desire to invade Venezuela as a way of diverting the American people’s attention from the pandemic they were in.

Last week U.S. Attorney-General William Barr announced that he was charging Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro and other senior officials in the country with narco-terrorism, drug trafficking, money laundering and corruption.

Even with social distancing, none of those assembled for the Barr announcement in the U.S. Justice Department building were at close enough range to one of the pillars in the foyer to notice the dusty cob web covered skeleton of one John Q. Doe who had, 30 years ago, said, “I’m going to hold my breath until the U.S. Justice Department charges the American CIA with narco-terrorism, drug trafficking, money laundering and corruption.”

Doe might still be alive today if he had not taken his own statement so literally.

So there was always the possibility that an invasion of Venezuela would fall in line with the announced policy of stopping the smuggling of illegal drugs across the Caribbean Sea.

Meanwhile aboard the U.S.S. Spiro Agnew, a U.S. Navy sailor had just spotted the ghostly outline of Christopher Columbus’ flagship the Santa Maria as well as the haunted ghost ship the Flying Dutchman.

. . .

The demon Asmodeus and the little green frog Nimrod were sitting in the middle of an empty Saint Peter’s Square in Rome drinking bottles of cognac.

They noticed a coffin going by.

“I wonder if that’s a Coronavirus victim,” Nimrod said as he used his long tongue to carefully lick up every drop of the precious liquid from the bottle that he had for the most part emptied.

“According to my sources,” Asmodeus lit himself 3 dozen cigarettes and put them in his mouth, “that coffin contains the 14th Century Sienese School Miraculous Crucifix that survived the San Marcello al Corso Church fire of May 22nd 1519 and halted the Great Plague of Rome of 1522 but was unable to withstand Pope Francis’ long-winded Urbi et Orbi speech of this past March 27th 2020 as Francis blathered on comfortably standing under a canopy while the Miraculous Crucifix got drenched in the pouring rain since it was outdoors by itself with no canopy protecting it. The wood on the sculpture apparently tumefied and exploded as the rainwater penetrated it.”

“What part of Italy is the most devastated by the Coronavirus?” Nimrod asked as he opened up a bottle of Mexican beer that was more popular outside Mexico than it was inside.

“It’s the town of Bergamo Italy (population 122,000) that’s the epicenter of the epidemic,” Asmodeus answered as he used a fire extinguisher to put out his burning mouth, “where over 600 each day are dying from the virus.”

“Why does the name Bergamo ring a bell?” Nimrod inquired as church bells rang in the distance.

“It was the Bishop and the Diocese of Bergamo that were the first in Italy to publish the prayer to the Inca earth mother goddess Pachamama on their website,” Asmodeus tried to bring back to life his water drenched cigarettes but was having about as much success as the Pope Francis invited Amazon female shaman who was using her rattles to try to raise the Miraculous Crucifix from its water drenched coffin.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 2nd
2020
The 15th Anniversary 
of the death 
of Pope Saint John Paul II

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The Norse Wolf Fenrir Visits Israel

July 26, 2017 at 3:30 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The Norse wolf Fenrir looked at the Rolex watch on his paw and realized that the Battle of Ragnarok wasn’t ready to begin just yet.

So he decided to go on another sightseeing tour somewhere in the world.

Today he chose Israel.

He danced with short skirted young Hebrew hotties in the most swinging nightclubs of Tel Aviv.

In Renfield R. Renfield like fashion, he had a hot fudge sundae poured over his head when he made an inappropriate pass at Wonder Woman film star Gal Gadot.

He then tried fishing in the Sea of Galilee where he didn’t have much luck catching fish either.

He stopped off in the village of Cana of Galilee where an archaeological dig was taking place.

The archaeologist was busy digging up 2000 year old bottles of wine.

Fenrir wondered what a 2000 year old bottle of wine tasted like and helped himself.

“God,” Fenrir thought to himself, “this is the best tasting wine I’ve ever tasted in my life.”

He then proceeded to drink up the other 11 excavated bottles of the 2000 year old wine.

He then stumbled his way to Jerusalem singing, “Roll out the barrel, we’ll have a barrel of fun, hic! for the gang’s all here…”

When he reached the Temple Mount, he wasn’t feeling so good.

So the Norse wolf Fenrir vomited all over the Temple Mount.

What came out in the flow of vomit was the undigested head of Hecate (the Greek goddess of witchcraft) that he had eaten a few months earlier.

As Fenrir stumbled his way in search of a pharmacy to cure his hang-over, he left the head behind on the Temple Mount.

Palestinians heading for prayer on the Haram al-Sharif were angry when they saw the head of Hecate and shouted towards a group of Jews praying at the Western Wall, “You’ve desecrated our place of prayer by dumping this head here.”

The Jews angrily responded, “What do you mean? Cutting people’s heads off is a Muslim thing. That is when you’re not busy blowing yourselves up and blowing up other people in the process. We don’t do severed heads. Our weapons are Uzis, tanks, missiles and planes.”

The exchange sparked more violence and another day of rioting.

Such was the climate to be found in the City of Peace.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday July 26th
2017.

Gal Gadot
Gal Gadot: Poured hot fudge sundae over the all paws and awfully fresh Norse wolf Fenrir.

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Wonder Woman: A Poem

July 16, 2017 at 6:28 pm (Arts, Comic Books, Culture, Entertainment, Film, Movies, Poetry) (, , , )

Wonder Woman: A Poem

A woman of mysterious origin
finds herself in world of war and sin
she lived most of her life in an island paradise
soon finds herself in a world of deception and lies
Her isle and time intertwine
War has come to destroy peace sublime

She finds herself in London in the midst of the Great War
and soon in France amidst much blood and gore
But is it Ares who has led man astray?
Or when the light in men’s hearts succumbs to darkness’ way?

-A poem written
by Christopher
Sunday July 16th
2017
(inspired by seeing the new Wonder Woman movie with Gal Gadot today)

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