Winter Solstice 2021

December 21, 2021 at 9:54 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The gypsy Celestia danced at the equator as the Winter Solstice took place in the Northern Hemisphere.

Darkness and winter descended over the land.

Senile old fool Joe Biden approved.

Pope Francis had abolished all Traditional Roman Rite services this Christmas in order to bring about the coming of the Antichrist.

At the North Pole, there was no sign of Santa Claus, reindeer, toymaking elves or the famous North Pole barber Tiny Tony.

Rather there was the entity Saturn Cronus present.

He had recently escaped from Tartarus disguised as the Omicron variant of the Covid-19 Coronavirus.

The ghost of Adolf Hitler was about to light an Olympic flame in honour of the titan Saturn Cronus rather than the Olympian god Zeus Jupiter.

The minute of the solstice occurred.

And Hitler’s ghost lit the Saturn Cronus Olympic flame and proclaimed the 2021 Winter Solstice Festival open.

Two Jesuit priests attending the ceremony decided to make the Yuletide gay by engaging in carnal relations with one another.

Meanwhile in Washington DC, senile old fool and Neo-Stalinist tyrant Joe Biden was about to give a televised speech in which he would blame the unvaccinated for all of America’s problems.

The fallen Archangel Mephistopheles smiled approvingly.

He possessed Biden’s body on occasion just as he possessed Hitler’s body during Der Fuhrer’s mortal lifetime.

As crap exited Biden’s anus into his enhanced Depends adult diapers, crap also exited Biden’s mouth as he said, “The unvaccinated are to blame for all of America’s problems.”

Mephistopheles smiled.

He recalled Hitler saying, “The Jews are to blame for all of Germany’s problems.”

Meanwhile the deranged psychopathic mad scientist Dr. Anthony Fauci (whose Satanic Temple initiation name was Dr. Mengele Frankenstein Fauci) was spending the Winter Solstice dressed as Der Fuhrer Adolf Hitler.

He was wearing Der Fuhrer’s brown uniform with swastika armbands and wearing an Adolf Hitler style moustache.

He raged and ranted in front of his own mirror image, “No one should celebrate Christmas. Don’t have dinner with your friends, relatives or loved ones. Wear a 1001 masks over your face. Anyone who disagrees with me should be fired on the spot. The unvaccinated should be forced to be vaccinated if need be. Freedom and liberty and rights should be curtailed (except for mine) in the name of the Common Good. Who defines what the Common Good is? Why I do of course. I am Science. I am the Apotheosis of the Cosmos. Everybody should follow me and do what I say or else.”

A sauerkraut cream pie was thrown in Fauci’s face by an invisible entity (the 6 foot 8 tall purple bunny rabbit with big pink floppety ears named Harvey Tallbanger).

Meanwhile up in Ottawa Canada the pig-faced Neo-Stalinist tyrant Justin Trudeau had made his blackface up to look like that of the late Ugandan dictator Idi Amin Dada.

Trudeau addressing his image in his mirror said, “I am going to order my Finance Minister to revoke the tax free status of any charity or church that opposes my Moloch worshipping and child sacrifice policies.”

Trudeau then bowed in front of a statue of Moloch.

Meanwhile in Istanbul, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan the would be Sultan of a revived Ottoman Empire was talking to the chief of his secret police.

“What have you got to inform me?” Erdogan asked as he modelled his Sultan’s robes designed by the House of Gucci in Florence, Tuscany.

“The ghost of the Byzantine Emperor Constantine XI has been seen wandering the streets of Istanbul,” his secret police chief head said.

“Constantine XI?” Erdogan was shocked, “The last Byzantine Emperor defeated and killed by Sultan Mehmed II of the Ottomans?”.

“The very one,” his secret police chief nodded.

A Cross appeared at the top of the dome of the Hagia Sophia.

Pope Francis did a Joe Biden impersonation in his underwear when informed of the news.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
December 21st 2021.

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Ghosts Galore

July 26, 2013 at 7:32 pm (The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

The entertainer in the pub sang, “I’m Henry VIII I am, I am, I just got married to the widow next door, she’s been married 7 times before and everyone was a Henry – Henr-ee  so that makes me Henry the Eighth I am…”

Outside the pub waiting for him was the ghost of Henry VIII and the ghost of his executioner.

“I didn’t find your song very humourous,” Henry harrumphed, “off with his head.”

The executioner swung his ghostly axe and the axe passed harmlessly through the entertainer’s head.

“I see you don’t know how to manifest spiritual objects into a material reality,”  Pan Goatee laughed as he astral projected by on his way to a replication of the Bohemian Grove ceremony on the banks of the Thames.

“Me?  I thought it was you who was going to bring the statue of the giant owl,”  former British Prime Minister Tony Blair said  in exasperation to the current Archbishop of Canterbury.

                     .         .        .

The ghost of Josef Stalin stood in shock on Brazil’s Copacabana Beach at the massive crowd of young people cheering Pope Francis.

A booming voice seemed to echo out of the heavens,  “Well Joe you stupid ass,  I didn’t think I’d ever see you again after you kicked the bucket.  Well now you know how many soldiers the Pope has.”

Stalin’s ghost looked up and saw a huge cloud in the shape of Sir Winston Churchill’s head smoking a giant cigar.

                        .          .          .

Adolf Hitler’s ghost sat in Rush Limbaugh’s huge dressing room and waited for the enormously stout talk show host to return.

The Fuhrer’s spirit tried to help himself to a piece of chicken from one of the 6 dozen buckets of KFC that sat on the dressing room table awaiting Mr. Limbaugh’s return.

But since he didn’t know how to project material objects into a spiritual reality, he couldn’t.

When Rush returned, the Fuhrer greeted him enthusiastically.

Speaking in a thick German accent and spraying his own moustache with his enthusiasm, the Fuhrer said, “I really love your show and agree with everything you say.  The non-whites in this country are getting far too uppity in my opinion.”

                 .         .         .

The Greek vampire Hades used the remote to turn off his satellite TV and then spoke to one of his aides, “You know the reception is so bad underground.  We really should think about switching over to Cable.”

“I’ll look into it, sir,”  his aide replied.

“But still despite the blurry picture, it still gives me some idea of the chaos that exists above,” Hades helped himself to some pomegranate seeds, “we must see what we can do about getting Cerberus back to his guard dog position again so we can stop all these damned spirits from crossing back over the River Styx to the world above.”

“I’ll see what I can do, sir,” his aide remarked.

“It’s all so frustrating,”   Hades hit his forehead, “where’s Persephone when you really need her?  All this masturbation starts to get on one’s nerves after a while.”

“You’re forgetting that it’s summer on Mount Olympus, sir,” his aide reminded him.

“Why doesn’t anyone remember to turn over the page on this damned calendar?” Hades snapped as he turned over the calendar several pages.

                 .           .            .

On one side of the River Styx,  Chris de Burgh sang, “Don’t pay the ferryman until he gets you to the other side…”

On Mount Olympus, Vincent Price spoke as he watched Michael Jackson dance on the moon,  

“Darkness falls across the land,
The midnight hour is close at hand…”

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter 
written by Christopher
Friday July 26th 2013

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