The Helpful Guest

October 15, 2019 at 10:55 pm (Short Story) (, , , , )

The Helpful Guest

A man and a woman from Denver, Colorado were staying at a large hotel in Waikiki, Hawaii.

They were attending a convention at the hotel and the convention festivities would begin with a dinner and dance to be held in the hotel’s main ballroom.

They put on their best formal evening attire and took the elevator from the 11th floor (where their suite was located) down to the main floor and lobby.

As the hotel was extremely large, they had no idea how to get to the main ballroom.

They went to the front desk and asked the desk clerk for directions.

He gave them directions which they faithfully followed.

They wound up at the hotel’s entrance on Kalakaua Avenue which is the main thoroughfare through Waikiki.

There was no sign of a ballroom in sight.

They walked back to the front desk and again asked for directions.

The clerk gave them the directions.

They followed the directions and again wound up at the hotel’s entrance on Kalakaua Avenue.

This procedure then took place half a dozen more times.

Embarrassed they decided to go back to their room rather than again ask the clerk for directions.

The husband would call a friend also going to the convention and ask if he’d drop by their room and walk them to the main ballroom.

They took the elevator up to the 11th floor and walked down to their room.

They saw approaching them a very beautiful young Hawaiian woman who appeared to be in her early 20s.

She wore a very elegant evening dress which almost looked Victorian in its elegance.

Struck by a thought, the man asked the girl, “Are you going to the convention dinner and dance in the main ballroom tonight?”.

“No, I’m not,” the girl answered.

“Oh, that’s too bad,” said the man, “we keep trying to find the main ballroom and we get hopelessly lost. We’ve already asked the front desk about half a dozen times for directions how to get there and we always wind up at the same place- the hotel’s entrance on Kalakaua Avenue.”

“This is an extremely large hotel,” the young woman admitted, “and easy to get lost in. And always winding up on Kalakaua Avenue? For two people from Denver, Colorado, walking around Waikiki at night can be dangerous sometimes. I’ll show you personally.”

The husband and wife then deduced that the woman was not a hotel guest but a hotel employee since she knew they came from Denver, Colorado.

They rode down the elevator with the young woman and went through the lobby following the beautiful young Hawaiian girl through the vast expanse of the hotel.

They came to an escalator.

“Go directly up there,” the girl pointed, “and up there is the main ballroom.”

The husband and wife looked up the escalator and hanging from the ceiling was a huge banner welcoming people to the convention.

“Thank you very much,” said the man, “What is your name by the way?”.

“My name is Victoria,” the young woman smiled.

The man reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet to give the girl a tip.

But when he looked up, she had gone.

“Did you see where she went?” The husband asked his wife.

“No,” the wife shook her head.

The next night after a day of convention activities, the man and his wife would be going on an evening tour.

They had gone to the lobby and were about to make the walk to the parkade where their rent-a-car was parked when suddenly the man said, “Let’s stop by the front desk. And ask who that Victoria was that helped us out last night. I really do want to give her a tip.”

They talked to the same clerk who had been working the night before.

The same one they had constantly pestered about directions.

“I don’t recall a Victoria who works here,” said the man, “but I’ll check the employee registry.”

There was no Victoria listed.

The husband asked if the clerk would mind checking the hotel guest list for anyone named Victoria.

No Victoria registered.

Puzzled, they left the front desk and began the long walk down the hotel hallway to the parkade.

They suddenly passed a painting and the wife nudged the husband and said, “The woman in that painting. Isn’t that the girl who helped us?”.

The man looked.

“Yes,” the man said, “It is. She must have won an Employee of the Year Award and they painted her picture and hung it here.”

They walked back to the front desk and told the clerk that the woman’s picture was hanging in the hallway and she must be an employee here.

The clerk asked the couple to show him the picture.

They took the clerk to see the painting.

“And you said this woman told you her name was Victoria?” The clerk asked.

“That’s right,” the husband nodded.

The clerk asked the couple, “Did you look at the name below the painting?”.

“No, we didn’t,” the husband replied.

“Look at the name,” said the clerk.

The name below the portrait read, 
Princess Victoria Ka’iulani.

“That woman,” said the clerk, “was the last Crown Princess of the Kingdom of Hawaii.”

. . .

Later that evening, the man and wife were telling their story and their experience to the tour guide of the tour they were going on.

The tour guide (who had a vast knowledge of Hawaiian history) seemed to be astounded by their story.

“Two things,” the tour guide held up two of his fingers, “One. How did the woman know you’re from Denver, Colorado? And the second thing… yesterday’s date… March 6th 1999. Now that date doesn’t of course mean anything to you and it obviously doesn’t mean anything to the clerk working the front desk. But yesterday March 6th 1999 would be 100 years to the day that Crown Princess Victoria Ka’iulani died on March 6th 1899.”

-A short story 
written by Christopher 
Tuesday October 15th
2019.

-based on a true story 

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Renfield, Loki and The Emergency Alert Message In Hawaii

January 13, 2018 at 10:27 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , )

Renfield, Loki and The Emergency Alert Message In Hawaii

The BBC News Announcer intoned, “As Hawaiians still cope with the trauma of the emergency alert message they got on their smart phones this morning, French President Emmanuel Macron has expressed his concern that the French baguette 🥖 needs to be designated as a UNESCO world heritage cultural treasure in order to ensure its authentic protection as a French cultural treasure…”

Said Renfield as he listened to the news, “The voice of the poodle is heard throughout the land” in a paraphrase of that line from the Song of Solomon, “The voice of the turtle is heard throughout the land.”

Renfield immediately got on his tablet and used his hacking and cyber intelligence gathering skills to determine who was ultimately responsible for sending out the emergency alert message to smart phone users in Hawaii that read, BALLISTIC MISSILE THREAT INBOUND TO HAWAII. SEEK IMMEDIATE SHELTER. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

In the Swiss Alps, the Norse trickster god Loki’s smart phone went off in his skiing chalet.

“Hello,” Loki held the phone to his ear.

“Bonjour, Monsieur Loki,” Renfield said as he took his melted ham, cheese and Hawaiian pineapple 🍍 laced baguette out of the microwave, “I hear you really enjoy those cheap drink specials you get on Waikiki Beach in Honolulu.”

“Yeah,” Loki admitted as he drank his hot toddy while looking at the Matterhorn outside his window.

“I imagine you’d no longer be getting those drink specials if Hawaiians found out who was responsible for those PTSD inducing emergency messages they got on their smart phones this morning,” Renfield used a napkin to wipe some melted cheese off his left nostril.

“What do you want?” Loki finally asked after a momentary silence.

“Funny, you should ask,” Renfield belched with great delicacy, “I wouldn’t mind a few of those millions of Norse plundered gold coins you happen to have suddenly showing up in my Swiss bank account.”

“All right,” said Loki who agreed to the transfer to buy Renfield’s silence.

As Amadeus quietly munched on his own melted Parisienne ham and Swiss cheese and Hawaiian pineapple laced baguette 🥖 and listened in on Renfield’s kitchen conversation, he could not help thinking that his friend Renfield did indeed have chutzpah as the rabbis would say.

For indeed it takes a lot of chutzpah to blackmail the Norse trickster god.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday January 13th
2018.

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Radio Contact: Close Encounters of The Vintage Kind

December 12, 2017 at 9:39 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Radio, Science, Science-Fiction, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Radio Contact: Close Encounters of The Vintage Kind

It is the first known asteroid to visit our solar system from interstellar space.

Scientists who have studied its speed and trajectory believe it originated in a planetary system around another star.

The object has a strange elongated shape making it look like a cigar.

Reminding one of that little known story from Classical Greek mythology where the Greek god Zeus sailing in his chariot across the heavens asked in Bill Clintonesque fashion, “Did anyone see where I put my cigar?”.

The object is travelling extremely fast with enough speed to avoid being captured by our Sun’s gravitational pull and is on a very eccentric trajectory eventually taking it out of our solar system.

The object is at least 400 metres long.

And it is 10 times longer than it is wide.

That ratio makes it more extreme than any asteroid or comet observed in our solar system.

The object rotates rapidly and is subject to dramatic changes in brightness.

Although believed to have formed around another star, scientists think it has been wandering across the Milky Way unattached to any star system for hundreds of millions of years before its chance encounter with our solar system.

The object has been given the name Oumuamua which means “a messenger from afar arriving first” in the native Hawaiian language.

The name reflects the object being discovered by a Hawaii-based astronomer at an observatory in Maui.

It was discovered on October 19th this year by Rob Weryk a postdoctoral researcher at the University of Hawaii Institute For Astronomy.

The discovery was made at the Pan-Starrs1 Observatory on Maui’s Haleakala volcano.

On the off chance that this first known interstellar asteroid in our solar system might have alien 👽 technology on it, an initiative backed by Russian billionaire entrepreneur venture capitalist and physicist Yuri Milner will use a radio telescope to listen for signals from it.

The team’s efforts will begin tomorrow with astronomers observing the asteroid across four different radio frequency bands.

. . .

80-year-old Saskatchewan farmer Jonas Watson was in excellent physical health.

He still owned and ran his large farmstead in central Saskatchewan.

An excellent mechanic, he still repaired his own farm machinery.

A lot of it was more than 40 or 50 years old but was still in excellent shape due to Watson’s caring hand.

Watson also repaired old clocks and watches as well as old TVs.

Sadly the only object that Jonas was unable to repair was the old classic vintage 1934 antique St. Regis Gothic Cathedral Radio that was made by ExceptionalRadios.

The radio had belonged to his father who had bought it in the year that it was made.

Try as he might, even Jonas, with all his skill and technical know how, was unable to get it working again.

Still the old radio was lovingly kept on a mantelpiece above the old fireplace in the farmhouse living room for all to see.

Jonas had not touched or worked on the radio in months.

Yet tonight on this evening of December 12th 2017 (the first evening of Hanukkah 2017) the radio suddenly came to life and turned on by itself as Jonas rocked in his rocking chair.

Jonas could hear a crackle coming from the radio speaker and then a rather peculiar electronic sounding voice saying, “We have arrived. Attention. We have arrived. And we are the first among many.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday December 12th
2017.

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