Warrior Princesses Spray Holy Water On Kremlin Meeting Rooms

September 16, 2022 at 10:49 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan is back home in Seoul, South Korea ready to perform with her cello at a classical concert

This past Tuesday September 13th and past Wednesday September 14th Hyung Grace Kwan had been in Astana Kazakhstan killing evil vampires and vampiresses who were attending Astana’s 7th Interfaith Congress.

Then yesterday Thursday September 15th Hyung and her ancestress the immortal princess Kwan Yin were spraying Holy Water around every single Kremlin meeting room in Moscow.

That is because Xi’s supernatural spirit advisor the Black Dragon was supposed to meet with Putin’s supernatural spirit advisor the demon Moloch (who was appearing to Putin in the guise of the Archangel Michael) in the Kremlin on that date.

The Holy Water that Hyung and Kwan used was from a cache of bottles of Holy Water that had been personally blessed by Pope St. Pius X (who was Pope from August 4th 1903 to August 20th 1914).

St. Pius X was the Pope who condemned the Modernist heresy (The Modernist heresy denies the Virgin Birth, Incarnate Deity, Substitionary Atonement For Humanity’s Sins by Dying On The Cross, Bodily Resurrection and 2nd Coming of Jesus Christ).

Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) is the apotheosis of the Modernist heresy.

That’s why Joe Biden’s Oval Office which is thoroughly doused in Pope Francis’ blessed Holy (?) Water (when it isn’t being doused by Joe Biden’s sulphurous bowel movements) is able to attract every single demon, devil, fallen angel and unclean spirit on the planet.

So as a result of the Holy Water doused on the Kremlin and its meeting rooms, the Black Dragon and Moloch (posing as Michael the Archangel) were unable to meet.

Their human operatives Communist China’s paramount leader Xi Jinping and Russian President Vladimir Putin were able to meet however at Samarkand Uzbekistan for the Shanghai Cooperation Organization summit.

At a sideline meeting between Xi and Putin at the SCO Summit, Xi personally humiliated the Russian leader for losing the war in Ukraine.

Although that was nothing to the personal humiliation that Xi suffered Wednesday night at the hands of a holographic image of British MP Renfield R. Renfield at the Astana state banquet for Xi.

Hyung Grace Kwan in the meantime had received a personal request from an admirer (a Calgary based geopolitical analyst) to play Antonio Vivaldi’s Spring Allegro from The Four Seasons at tonight’s cello concert.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 16th
2022.

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Baal In Kazakhstan

September 13, 2022 at 10:58 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

The demon Baal in Kazakhstan

The ghost of Cecil B. DeMille had taken a technicolour photo of the demon Baal in Kazakhstan.

The demon Baal was the object of veneration and worship at a human sacrifice ceremony at a site just north of the Kazakh capital of Astana (now called Nur-Sultan).

Due to his bum knee, Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) was unable to attend the ceremony in hopes of improving ecumenical relations with all religions and all deities.

A backdrop choreographer for the U.S. Democratic Party was present to get ideas for Joe Biden’s next major speech.

He was the same choreographer who had done the Nazi colours blood red backdrop for Biden’s speech in Philadelphia back on September 1st of this year 2022.

Samhain Cardinal Salaman was a member of the Vatican entourage accompanying Francis to this Inter-Faith Summit in Astana.

Cardinal Salaman was examining the Cecil B. DeMille technicolour photograph alongside South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan.

Hyung had spent the day locating evil vampires and vampiresses (who were attending the summit) in their coffins and beheading them and staking them through the heart.

She was to vampires and vampiresses what the Covid-19 vaccines were to previously healthy and strong young athletes (they were all dropping dead on the spot as a result).

“So,” Samhain Cardinal Salaman sipped his tea, “I understand you’re a direct descendant of the immortal princess Kwan Yin.”

“That is correct,” Hyung nodded.

“And she’s venerated as the goddess of mercy by various branches of Buddhism,” the Cardinal helped himself to a mooncake.

“Yes, that’s true,” Hyung said, “My ancestress is immortal (having drunk from springs of immortality from a certain mountain in a certain valley in China) but she doesn’t consider herself a goddess although others do.”

“As opposed to George Soros, Bill Gates and Klaus Schwab who all consider themselves gods even though others don’t,” Samhain mused aloud.

“Yes, very true,” Hyung poured more tea.

“You know I know nothing whatsoever about most religions except a smattering of some knowledge of kabbalah,” Cardinal Salaman explained, “Which is why Pope Francis had me baptised, then confirmed, then ordained a deacon, then ordained a priest, then consecrated a bishop and then created a Cardinal all on the same day.”

“I see,” Hyung smiled at the admission.

“So, tell me,” the Cardinal once again took a close look at the ghost of Cecil B. DeMille’s technicolour photograph of the demon Baal, “Are Baal and Moloch one and the same god?”.

“Many theologians and professors of Classical Middle Eastern History seem to think so,” the scholarly vampire huntress answered, “but in fact Baal and Moloch are demonic twin brothers.”

“There are twins among demons?” Cardinal Salaman was surprised.

“A few, yes,” Hyung nodded.

“So, is Moloch in Kazakhstan as well?” The Cardinal inquired.

“No, he’s in Moscow serving as an advisor to Russian President Vladimir Putin,” the vampire huntress answered.

“Really?” Salaman helped himself to another mooncake.

“Although Moloch is posing as the Archangel Michael to Putin,” Hyung explained, “so Putin thinks he was following Saint Michael the Archangel’s advice when he invaded Ukraine in February to capture the capital of Kyiv and then the rest of Ukraine ”

“Now I may not know too much religion especially Catholicism,” The Cardinal took another sip of tea, “but I do know that Saint Michael the Archangel is considered one of the Patron Saints of the City of Kyiv. Did Putin really think that Michael would ask him to invade and conquer a city of which he’s a Patron Saint?”.

“Well, I don’t think Putin really knows much about Ukrainian history and culture and tradition,” Hyung answered.

“In that he’s a lot like the late Soviet dictator Josef Stalin,” Salaman noted.

“In fairness to Putin,” Hyung pointed out, “He only followed Moloch because Moloch was posing as Saint Michael the Archangel. Whereas Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden and most U.S. Democrats follow the demons Baal and Baphomet even though Baal and Baphomet are appearing as themselves Baal and Baphomet.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday September 13th
2022.

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Hyung Grace Kwan En Route To Astana Kazakhstan

September 12, 2022 at 9:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural) (, , , , , , )

South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan lops off the heads of vampires in practice and preparation for this week’s Inter-Faith Congress of Religious Leaders in Astana Kazakhstan (a city now called Nur-Sultan because current Kazakh leaders have bad taste as do most leaders in the world today).

The satanic AntiPope Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) would be attending the Inter-Faith Congress.

So probably no prayers would be said in Latin.

In addition to various religious leaders attending the Congress, there would be numerous vampires and vampiresses attending.

Most pre-eminent among them would be the ancient Egyptian vampire Osiris (worshipped as a deity by the Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite of Freemasonry), the ancient Egyptian vampiress Isis (worshipped as a deity by the Grand Orient Lodge of France- the only Masonic lodge in the world that allows women to be members) and their son the ancient Egyptian vampire Horus (also worshipped as a deity by the Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite of Freemasonry).

Also attending the Congress would be the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith who owns a great estate just north of the Kazakh capital.

Allatallahbel the Vampiress-Priestess of Baal (who briefly took possession of the Vatican for a few years beginning on October 13th 2017) would also be attending.

As would Pachamama (the dragon woman shapeshifting demon goddess of the Incas) and the Spirit Great-Grandmother of the West invoked by a Huron shaman in Quebec City, Canada at the request of Pope Francis.

The demons Baal, Baphomet, Mammon and Mephistopheles would also be attending.

After wiping her sword clean, Hyung listened to British MP Renfield R. Renfield’s podcast.

Renfield was commenting on the amount of witchcraft and sorcery being practiced in the world today.

He noted that the Spirit Great-Grandmother of the West was invoked in Canada on July 28th and the demon bull god Baal was quite literally worshipped at the opening ceremonies of the 2022 Commonwealth Games in Birmingham, England on the same date.

Then Renfield noted that within a month and a half of those two satanic pagan rituals, the Head of State of both countries (Canada and the United Kingdom) would pass away.

Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.

“Sadly her son Prince Charles now King Charles III is more amiable to the Great Reset agenda of the World Economic Forum,” Renfield explained, “Let us hope and pray that he’ll come to his senses before it’s too late.”

“Amen,” said Hyung.

-A vampire novel chapter
Written by Christopher
Monday September 12th
2022.

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Hyung Grace Kwan Meets Kim Yo-jong

February 10, 2018 at 9:57 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Hyung Grace Kwan Meets Kim Yo-jong

South Korean vampire huntress and National Intelligence Service agent Hyung Grace Kwan (an ex-girlfriend of Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing) was meeting with Kim Yo-jong (the half-sister of North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un) in her hotel room at the request of South Korean President Moon Jae-in.

Both women were dressed identically in white blouses, tight black skirts and black spiked stiletto high heeled shoes.

But despite their similar attire, neither woman seemed embarrassed by wearing a similar wardrobe.

When they had finished discussing what they had to discuss, Hyung Grace Kwan smiled over her cup ☕️ of tea and said, “I have a surprise for you.”

“Really?” Kim Yo-jong seemed intrigued.

Hyung walked to the door.

She opened it and in walked one of Hyung’s ancestresses the princess Kwan Yin who became an immortal and was in fact worshipped as the Buddhist mother goddess of compassion and mercy by various sects of Buddhists throughout Asia. She wore a beautiful pink coloured gown.

“Kwan Yin?” The officially atheist Kim Yo-jong looked surprised as she recognized the Buddhist mother goddess from oil paintings she had seen of her as a child, “You actually exist?”.

“Yes, my child, I do,” Kwan Yin smiled in motherly fashion.

Meanwhile in the hotel lobby, the DARPA contract assassin and genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee was waiting to go up to the hotel room to assassinate Kim Yo-jong.

He had been ordered to do so by a higher-up in the American NSA.

He could have astral projected into her hotel room but there was some unknown supernatural power present in the hotel that was preventing him from doing so.

So he would have to wait for an opportune moment to break into the hotel room and then bump off the half-sister of Kim Jong-un.

As he waited in the hotel lobby, a contingent of North Korean 🇰🇵 female cheerleaders paraded through the lobby in their sharply attired red skirts and red spiked stiletto high heeled shoes 👠.

“How nice to see nothing but beautiful women,” Pan Goatee thought to himself, “Quite a change from North America particularly the city of Calgary where you seem to see nothing but fat ugly blimps particularly among females of that racial group that Neo-Nazis and Ku Klux Klansmen consider the master race.”

When the cheerleaders were escorted and locked into their particular hotel rooms by members of a North Korean security detail, Pan Goatee decided to go upstairs and break down the door to Kim Yo-jong’s room and assassinate her.

As he walked up the stairs in his Bermuda shorts showing off his hairy goat’s legs, unbeknownst to the satyr, he was being followed by a wolf pure white in colour.

The pure white wolf also had a unique colour of eyes- Mediterranean blue.

Pan Goatee used his mind’s psychic powers to direct a flying mallet to knock out all the members of the North Korean security detail in the hallway.

Coincidentally in the hotel’s elevators at the time, the elevator music being played was the musical melody to that old Beatles song Maxwell’s Silver Hammer 🔨.

Pan Goatee kicked down the door 🚪 of Kim Yo-jong’s hotel room startling the three women inside the room.

Pan Goatee was startled himself.

He had raised his machete to cut off the head of the woman wearing the North Korean 🇰🇵 flag lapel pin when he noticed she wasn’t ugly.

His superiors at DARPA had told Pan Goatee that Kim Yo-jong was ugly in hopes that would make it easier for him to kill the North Korean despot’s sister.

“Hey, you’re not ugly,” Pan Goatee stood there frozen.

At that moment, the white wolf with blue eyes leapt into the room and bit Pan Goatee on the arm.

“Ouch, that hurts!” Pan Goatee shouted for the satyr was not used to receiving a mortal wound of any sort.

The white wolf with blue eyes then looked at the three women, turned around and left the room.

“Who was that white wolf?” Kim Yo-jong asked as one of the North Korean Women’s Orchestras played Rossini’s William Tell Overture in the hotel’s main ballroom.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday February 10th
2018.

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Kwan Yin Meets Hyung Grace Kwan

October 6, 2017 at 7:20 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Kwan Yin Meets Hyung Grace Kwan

Kwan Yin the Buddhist Mother Goddess of Mercy walked the streets of Seoul South Korea 🇰🇷.

During her mortal life, Kwan had been a princess given to acts of charity and compassion and helping the poor, sick and needy.

She had had a few children during her mortal life.

And those children had children of their own.

And now today Kwan Yin was meeting one of her descendants the noted South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan.

“Hyung,” Kwan said as she hugged and greeted her, “I have a warning for you, your people and the world.”

“Does it involve Kim Jong-un?” Hyung asked.

“No,” Kwan shook her head, “The dark forces act like stage magicians in that they always do something to distract the audience’s attention while they get to the main part of their trick. Kim Jong-un is just a distraction. Putin is the main act.”

“Putin?” Hyung’s jaw dropped.

“Yes, Putin is being advised by the demon Moloch,” Kwan said, “only Moloch is appearing to him in the form of the Archangel Michael. So Putin thinks he’s being advised by Saint Michael the Archangel when he isn’t. And that is a very dangerous situation for the world.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday October 6th
2017.

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Mei-ling Manchu and Kim Jong-un’s English Lord Adviser

August 1, 2017 at 4:34 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , )

Beijing-based Communist vampiress Mei-ling Manchu was starting to worry about one of her vampiric sires- Lord Byron Jennings.

She had kidnapped Byron Jennings 84 years ago in London when he was an 8-year-old boy and had brought him back to China with her.

Mei-ling Manchu had celebrated the birth of the People’s Republic of China on October 1st 1949 by allowing a vampire to bite her on the neck and turn her into a vampiress.

She had turned her protege Byron Jennings into a vampire on June 25th 1950 to celebrate North Korea’s invasion of South Korea.

When Kim Jong-un was declared supreme leader of North Korea on December 28th 2011, Beijing sent the Englishman Byron Jennings to Pyongyang to serve as an adviser to the new young North Korean leader.

Just over a month ago, Byron Jennings celebrated his 67th vampiric birthday June 25th of this year by claiming his long dead late grandfather’s lordly title in the British House of Lords.

Now the Maoist Communist Lord Byron Jennings was plotting with Kim Jong-un the destruction of the United States of America.

Mei-ling Manchu felt that her Communist and vampiric protege Lord Byron Jennings and Kim Jong-un were going too far this time.

So Mei-ling Manchu arranged a secret meeting in Tokyo with South Korean National Intelligence Service agent and former vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan.

There at that meeting, Mei-ling Manchu delivered to Hyung Grace Kwan everything she knew about the evil plans of North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un and his Communist British Lord adviser Lord Byron Jennings.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday August 1st
2017.

Mei-ling Manchu prior to her meeting with Hyung Grace Kwan in Tokyo.

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Dracul Van Helsing and The 84-Year-Old Kidnapping Mystery

May 18, 2017 at 4:03 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Dracul Van Helsing had just received a text message from the Greek goddess Aphrodite.

She had gone to Pyongyang North Korea and convinced her husband Hephaestus to stop building missiles for Kim Jong-un.

He agreed.

The trouble was he had already built 666 missiles for Kim Jong-un.

And the missile of his that North Korea had launched this past weekend had been successful.

In addition, an ancient Persian talismanic image that had been painted on each missile (showing the image of a scorpion attacking the testicles of a white bull with the words IN HOC SIGNO VINCES above the image) seemed to ensure the missiles’ success.

Kim Jong-un had been instructed to paint the image and the accompanying Latin slogan on his missiles by a beautiful Korean vampiress who was a disciple of the Persian demonic god-prince Ahriman.

The Korean vampiress appeared wearing a white gown to Kim Jong-un and gave him his instructions.

She was known to Kim only as the Mysterious Woman In White.

Aphrodite’s information to Dracul had been confirmed in a report sent to him by his friend Peter Whitstable the Fox Mulder of Interpol.

Whitstable did not tell Van Helsing that the source for his information was Dracul’s ex-girlfriend the South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan (now an agent for the South Korean National Intelligence Service who was currently spying in North Korea).

Dracul decided to phone Whitstable to further discuss the report.

After rehashing what had been said in the original report, Whitstable said, “Oh Dracul, there’s something else.”

“What would that be?” Dracul asked.

“Kim Jong-un apparently has an advisor- an Englishman who was loaned to him from the People’s Republic of China,” Whitstable stated.

“An Englishman who used to work for the People’s Republic of China and now works for North Korea’s dictator?” Dracul was amazed, “Who is this Englishman?”.

“Do you recall reading in your history books about the kidnapping of Byron Jennings back in the early 1930s?” Whitstable inquired.

“That was the case referred to by the North American press at the time as Britain’s Charles Lindbergh Jr. Kidnapping,” Dracul recalled, “although Byron Jennings was considerably older than Charles Lindbergh Jr. Byron was the grandson of a leading member of the British House of Lords at the time Lord Oswald Jennings as well as the son of a not so leading British Conservative MP of the day Spencer Jennings. Rumour had it that Byron had been kidnapped by Mei-ling Manchu the real life daughter of the real life Fu Manchu.”

“That is correct, Dracul,” Whitstable acknowledged, “and that’s who is currently advising Kim Jong-un. None other than Byron Jennings who was kidnapped as an 8-year-old-boy 84 years ago.”

“Good lord,” said Dracul, “he must now be in his 90s.”

“He is,” Whitstable admitted, “but he doesn’t look it. He’s a vampire.”

“Really?” said Dracul, “Who turned him into a vampire?”.

“Mei-ling Manchu the daughter of Fu Manchu,” Whitstable answered, “who’s currently alive and Undead and well and living as a vampiress in Beijing.”

After talking with Whistable for a while longer, Dracul then telephoned Inspector Depp of Scotland Yard and told him to finally close the books on an 84-year-old kidnapping mystery.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday May 18th
2017.


Mei-ling Manchu becoming a vampiress after becoming a red dress Communist.

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Cthulhu On The South China Sea

April 11, 2017 at 4:30 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Horror, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

“Mr. President,” Trump’s aide was forced to interrupt him as he was writing yet another Twitter tweet, “ships are being attacked in the South China Sea.”

“Whose ships?” Trump looked up, “our ships? Who’s doing the attacking? The Chinese?”.

“All types of countries’ ships are being attacked in the South China Sea including China’s,” the aide replied, “and the attack is being carried out by a strange sea creature who stands hundreds of meters tall, has an octopus head for a head, the wings of a dragon on its back and has giant humanoid arms and legs with its hands and feet webbed.”

“Sounds like the preview trailer I saw for the latest Pirates of the Caribbean film with Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow,” Trump reflected.

“Nevertheless it’s real, Mr. President,” the aide said grimly, “The NSA believe that it’s the creature Cthulhu originally believed to have been a fictional character first mentioned in the works of an early 20th Century horror story writer called H.P. Lovecraft.”

Trump picked up the phone and dialed a number, “Hello, Ivanka? Get thee to a library and read up everything you can find about a fictional monster called Cthulhu mentioned in the works of a horror writer called H.P. Lovecraft.”

. . .

The Royal Australian Navy ship The H.M.S. Pirate Don Durk of Dowdee was the only one that survived the attack by the creature Cthulhu of all the ships attacked in the South China Sea that fateful day of April 11th 2017.

First Mate Gil Mebson asked Captain Haul Pogan how their ship The Dowdee managed to survive.

“Well when we left Mumbai,” Captain Pogan took off his alligator boot to scratch his foot, “that psychic I had gone to see in Mumbai Tantric Tanya advised me to cover the ship in garlic. When I asked why, she said, I’d know the reason when we sailed back to Australia. This must be the reason.”

“So this Cthulhu creature is allergic to garlic like vampires and certain demons are,” Gil Mebson said as he ate his butter chicken.

“Apparently,” Captain Pogan opened a can of beer, “and it’s a good thing too. Otherwise I might never have heard the song Waltzing Matilda sung ever again.”

“That ship there doesn’t seem to have been attacked either,” Gil Mebson pointed to a ship that suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

“It appears to be a North Korean ship judging from the flag,” Captain Pogan peered through his binoculars, “and it’s got a huge television screen atop the mass broadcasting a speech from North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un.”

“I wonder what he’s saying,” Gil Mebson drank some rum.

“Well, if my Korean serves me correctly,” Captain Pogan replied, “Korean which I learned from making love with beautiful female members of the Korean Dragon Sisterhood Warrioress Society back in my days in Seoul, Kim Jong-un is reciting passages from the Necronomicon in Korean. The Necronomicon was originally written in Arabic by Abdul Alhadrez in Damascus in 730 AD. I myself read the Latin edition of The Necronomicon as a young Jesuit seminarian until I decided I couldn’t accept celibacy after attending a Sean Connery James Bond Film Festival held in Melbourne. I believe the passages Kim Jong-un is reciting are those passages that call the Cthulhu to rise from his home at the bottom of the sea.”

. . .

Peter Whitstable the man they called the Fox Mulder of Interpol was surprised to receive a phone call from South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan.

He hadn’t talked to Hyung ever since she broke up with his friend the Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing.

Hyung had caught Dracul in bed in a menage a trois with the Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec and the Egyptian vampiress Isis back on December 21st 2012 the day the world was supposed to end.

“Hyung, what’s up?” Whitstable asked.

“It’s Kim Jong-un,” Hyung replied, “last Christmas, he managed to get his hands on an ancient Korean copy of the book The Necronomicon. He’s now using that book to raise deadly occultic supernatural creatures from their resting places in the Underworld and at the bottom of the sea.”

“Wow,” said Whitstable, “too bad western intelligence hadn’t found about this earlier.”

Whitstable had on his desk a detailed report about today’s Cthulhu attacks in the South China Sea.

“Kim Jong-nam his half-brother found out about it and was going to reveal all after a gambling trip to Macau,” Hyung said, “but he got that fatal VX nerve agent towel in the face at Kuala Lumpur International Airport.”

“And now the young Stalinist brat Kim Jong-un has raised Cthulhu to attack shipping in the South China Sea by broadcasting Necronomicon pasages via satellite transmission to large screen TVs on North Korean ships,” Whitstable seethed.

“Who knows what other monsters he’s now going to raise?” Hyung looked over at her Samsung large screen TV.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday April 11th
2017.

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Flashback To The End of The World- Dec. 21st 2012

September 9, 2014 at 4:04 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, Humour, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Flashback To The End of The World- Dec. 21st 2012

The vampire novel chapter I wrote back on December 21st 2012 when something of cosmic significance was supposed to happen on Earth on that date according to Mayan, Aztec and Hopi Indian prophecies.

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2012/12/dec-21st-2012-tempest-or-much-ado-about.html?m=1

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Renfield and Rebecca Black’s Moment

July 19, 2011 at 9:29 pm (Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

“I noticed Rebecca Black has just released a new song and video called My Moment,” Amadeus Emanon remarked as he spilled hot buttered popcorn all over his freshly washed shirt.

“That was the wonderful thing about being in a coma for two months,” Renfield said through mouth loads of tuna fish sandwich, “I missed all the fuss and kefuffle over Rebecca Black’s song Friday.”

“I happen to like Rebecca Black’s song Friday,” Amadeus looked at the calendar and noticed that it was a Tuesday.

“Well, if you don’t mind me saying so, Amadeus, I’ve always thought you a bit weird,” Renfield put some bananas and chocolate sauce on top of his tuna fish sandwich.

“I noticed Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing on his relationship status at Facebook says In a complicated relationship with Rebecca Black and Robinson Crusoe’s manservant Friday,” Amadeus then helped himself to his plate of fish n’ chips.

“Really?” Renfield was shocked, “But Rebecca Black is only 13 years old. I didn’t know Van Helsing liked them that young and wouldn’t a manservant be a reference to a guy? I didn’t know Van Helsing swung both ways.”

“I believe his relationship status is meant to be a joke,” Amadeus explained, “since Rebecca Black had a hit song called Friday and as for Robinson Crusoe’s manservant Friday, he’s a fictional character in a fictional novel called Robinson Crusoe that was written by British writer Daniel Defoe back in 1719.”

“Well not everyone has the advantage of a classical education such as yourself,” Renfield snorted between mouthfuls of tuna fish and banana and chocolate sauce sandwiches.

“Well, I’ve never had a formal classical education,” Amadeus replied, “I just read a great deal of the books in the Boss’ library. Maybe if you read the books in there instead of all the porno girlie magazines, you’d be classically educated too.”

“I don’t look at porno photos of women in magazines,” Renfield protested, “I look at them on the Net.”

“So Van Helsing doesn’t really pursue 13-year-old girls nor is he bisexual,” Amadeus put some more malt vinegar on his fish, “in fact he’s 100% excessively heterosexual.”

“How can someone be excessively heterosexual?” Renfield put his sandwich down and stared at Amadeus quizzically.

“Well those were the words that South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan used of him in a conversation I had with her once,” Amadeus bit into the batter of fresh Atlantic cod.

“Really?” Renfield bit his lip, “Damn! I knew I should have videotaped what Dracul and Hyung were doing in that hotel room in Cannes that time we had a room next to them. It would have made for one hot tape.”

To be continued.

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