Agamemnon and Putin

February 27, 2018 at 11:00 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Agamemnon and Putin

King Agamemnon of Mycenae was well aware that his brother Menelaus the king of Sparta was pissed.

That horny young Trojan stud Paris had run off with Menelaus’ wife Helen and had taken her back to Troy with him.

Menelaus was anxious to wage war on the Trojans.

Agamemnon wasn’t sure whether it was right to sack an entire city over the loss of one woman.

Possibly negotiations could be done with Troy and Helen could be sent back to Sparta peacefully to receive her punishment.

Ares the god of war however had different ideas.

He thought it was about time for a major global war which would result in bloodshed and great loss of life.

Ares decided to tempt Agamemnon into war.

He presented Agamemnon with visions of the immense treasures that Troy possessed.

“If you wage war on the Trojans and sack this city, all these treasures will be yours,” Ares tempted, “make unreasonable demands on the Trojans in your peace offerings. Besides the return of Helen, demand these things…”

Ares gave him a list.

“The Trojans will naturally refuse,” Ares smiled, “and then you can wage war on them. And take all their treasures for yourself.”

“And will you support me in this war?” Agamemnon asked.

“Of course,” Ares promised.

Later of course, Ares would change his mind after Aphrodite the goddess of love gave him an out of this world blow job.

He switched his support to the Trojans as a result of Aphrodite’s oral persuasion.

But in the meantime, Agamemnon was hooked on Ares’ offer.

All those hidden treasures of the Trojans went through his mind.

His mind made up, he decided to go on a deer 🦌 hunt and then make his final decision.

. . .

Russian President Vladimir Putin was reading a report on the situation in Syria.

He had been informed that the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith was siding with the Turks in northern Syria while the medieval vampire Dracula was siding with the Kurds (against the Transylvanian-Wallachian nobleman’s old enemy the Turks).

Putin rubbed his head.

He had certainly come a long way from being a spy for a state based on atheistic dialectical materialism.

He had been getting loads of supernatural visitors the past few years as well as reading numerous reports of supernatural occurrences in various war zones.

“You should attack Israel 🇮🇱,” said Ares the Greek god of war who was standing in Putin’s office.

“Speak of the devil,” thought Putin who returned back to the present from his musings on the supernatural.

At one time he would have been surprised by the sudden appearance of the Greek god of war in his office but not anymore.

Ares meanwhile had just been given an out of this world blow job by Allatallahbel the Vampiress Priestess of Baal.

He had been promised a lot more if he could get Putin to attack Israel.

So Ares had promptly left Allatallahbel’s boudoir and hurried to Putin’s office.

“Why should I invade Israel?” Putin bit into his kosher smoked meat on rye sandwich.

“To take control of Israel’s hidden treasures,” Ares smiled temptingly.

“What hidden treasures?” Putin asked.

Ares then filled Putin’s mind with visions of Israel’s hidden treasures.

“I didn’t know Israel had such treasures,” Putin finished his kosher smoked meat on rye sandwich.

“It does,” said Ares whose smart phone suddenly went off.

He received a text message from his lover Aphrodite who was busy servicing an 84-year-old man with an inexhaustible mojo who lived in a small fishing 🎣 village in Italy.

“What an unfaithful floozy,” Ares said aloud before heading back to Allatallahbel’s boudoir.

Meanwhile Putin was thinking 🤔 about Ares’ visions of Israel’s hidden treasures.

He would go on a deer 🦌 hunt and then make up his mind.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday February 27th


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Preparations For War

February 21, 2018 at 9:58 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Preparations For War

The Spanish Civil War of 1936-39 had preceded the Nazi invasion of Poland and the outbreak of the Second World War.

In some ways, it served as a prelude to it.

The Spanish Republican side was supported by the Soviet Union, the Communist International and Mexico’s far left revolutionary government of the day.

The Spanish Nationalists were supported by Fascist Italy and Nazi Germany.

So Spain served as a backdrop for great foreign powers to conduct their proxy wars.

Far longer and bloodier than the Spanish Civil War has been the Syrian Civil War (from 2011 until the present) in which great foreign powers have likewise fought their proxy wars.

Saudi Arabia has backed Sunni Muslim militias against the Damascus led government of Syrian President Bashar al-Assad (which is supported by the government of Shiite Iran- Saudi Arabia’s arch enemy).

The U.S. supported the Kurds against the Islamist terrorist based Islamic State.

The victorious Kurds in parts of Syria now find themselves under attack by Turkish forces since the Kurds are seen as a threat to Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan’s desire to revive the Ottoman Empire with himself as Sultan.

Russia meanwhile is backing its ally Bashar al-Assad against any and all comers who would remove Assad from power.

The Lebanese Hezbollah movement (a Shiite ally of Iran) supports Assad.

Israel is now becoming involved in the Syrian conflict because it sees its arch enemy Iran as using a victorious Assad led Syria as a launching pad to attack Israel.

So the Syrian people now find themselves being used as quite literally sacrificial pawns in proxy wars fought between outside great powers.

It was upon this landscape of blood that ancient vampiress and medieval vampire now surveyed with their eyes.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday February 21st

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Reptilian On The Temple Mount

December 16, 2017 at 9:53 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Reptilian On The Temple Mount

The Mossad agent they call the Controller of The Golem was in his Jerusalem office when one of his aides entered the office.

“Sir, minutes ago a UFO was spotted above the Temple Mount and now an ET has been seen walking around the Temple Mount,” said the aide.

“An ET?” The Controller ran his fingers through his hair, “Is it an ET gray?”.

“No, sir,” the aide shook his head, “It’s a reptilian.”

“A reptilian?” The Controller turned white, “Those are nasty motherfuckers.”

“Indeed, sir,” the aide agreed, “that’s why agents at the location have given it the code name Oedipus.”

“Tell them I’ll be there as soon as possible,” the Controller realized that his corned beef sandwich would have to wait.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday December 16th


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Krampusnacht 2017

December 5, 2017 at 8:55 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Krampusnacht 2017

The half-goat half-demon creature of the Christmas season Krampus (who might be thought of as the Anti-Saint Nicholas) was busy gathering up Canadian advertisers and putting them in coal sacks to carry them off to Hell as the commercials and TV ads shown on Canadian television this year of 2017 were the most depraved in history.

The advertisers vigorously objected to their fate but Krampus ignored their pleas and put them in his sack anyways.

Canada’s pot smoking and pot legalizing Prime Minister Justin Trudeau only escaped being put in a bag and being carried off to Hell by putting a lamp shade over his head and holding a sign in front of him that said I Don’t Pose For Selfies.

. . .

Russian President Vladimir Putin was pissed at the fact that the International Olympic Committee had banned his country from participating at next year’s Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang South Korea.

“You should really do something about it,” said the demon Moloch who was appearing to Putin in the apparitional form of the Archangel Michael.

“What should I do?” Putin ripped up a subpoena from U.S. Special Counsel Robert Mueller.

“Who don’t you invade Israel?” Moloch as Michael suggested.

“Why should I invade Israel?” Putin said while glancing at a Happy Hanukkah greeting card someone had sent him.

“Why not?” Moloch as Michael shrugged.

“I need a better reason than that,” Putin said as he ate a cracker with Black Sea caviar on it.

“Your influence in the Middle East will soar out of this world,” Moloch smiled, “particularly in lieu of what looks like Donald Trump’s impending announcement that he’s going to recognize Jerusalem as Israel’s eternal undivided capital.”

“You might have a point there,” Putin rubbed his chin in contemplative 🤔 fashion.

. . .

Renfield R. Renfield MP was having a caucus meeting with his fellow Transhumanist MP Morgana Fay Lee (the Welsh Vampiress Morgana) the MP for Newbridge in Wales.

They were discussing the possibility of war in the Middle East in lieu of Trump’s announcement on the status of Jerusalem.

“I suppose one good thing that might come out of it is Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan might sever relations with the U.S. if Trump goes ahead,” Renfield stated, “which means that the would be Ottoman Sultan would be kicked out of NATO.”

A scream could be heard coming from the next room as a British Conservative MP accused of sexual harassment by dozens of women was thrown into Krampus’ bag.

Renfield looked at the calendar and commented, “That’s right. It is Krampusnacht tonight isn’t it?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday December 5th


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Battle of Jerusalem- 1917 And Now 2017?

December 4, 2017 at 10:15 pm (Avatar Speaks, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Battle of Jerusalem – 1917
And Now 2017?

The Mossad Agent called the Controller of The Golem was reading an Israeli newspaper that said U.S. President Donald Trump might recognize Jerusalem as Israel’s eternally undivided capital this week.

The Controller of The Golem was an astute enough geopolitical analyst (unlike Mr. Trump) to realize that such a formal unilateral announcement on the part of the U.S. (which had not been arrived at in formal Israeli-Palestinian peace negotiations) would probably cause massive unrest in the Arab and Islamic world.

And might even lead to an all out war in the Middle East between Israel and the Muslim world.

Nathan (the Controller’s real name) reflected on the fact that it was 100 years ago this late autumn and early winter that the Battle of Jerusalem was fought.

The Battle of Jerusalem fought between November 17th 1917 to December 30th 1917 was a battle fought in the Middle Eastern theatre of the First World War.

The opposing forces involved in the Battle was the British Empire against the Ottoman and German Empires.

Forces of the United Kingdom, Australia, India and New Zealand were fighting Turkish and German troops.

The commander of British forces was General Edmund Allenby.

The battle was fought on the coast of the Mediterranean Sea north of Jaffa into the Judean Hills in and around Jerusalem.

Jerusalem had been conquered by the Ottoman Empire in 1517 and now exactly 400 years later its rule was about to end.

The British Commander General Allenby had been assigned by his superiors in London to take the city but he had been assigned an impossible task.

He had been ordered to take the city without a shot being fired.

How on Earth, Allenby asked his superiors, was that to be done?

“Pray,” was the directive the British wartime cabinet sent back.

The answer did not seem very helpful to Allenby.

Nevertheless Allenby followed the advice and prayed.

And it happened shortly afterwards that Allenby was given a copy of Bible scholar Dr. H. Aldersmith’s 1898 book The Fulness of The Nations.

The book was an analysis of the Old Testament prophecies regarding Israel.

In his analysis of Isaiah Chapter 31, Dr. Aldersmith believed that the United Kingdom would have a part to play in the restoration of Jerusalem to the Jews and this would be accomplished through some type of flying machine.

Dr. Aldersmith based his belief on Isaiah 31 verses 4 and 5.

Verse 4 reads “For thus hath the Lord spoken unto me, Like as the lion and the young lion roaring on his prey, when a multitude of shepherds is called forth against him, he will not be afraid of their voice, nor abase himself for the noise of them: so shall the Lord of hosts come down to fight for Mount Zion, and for the hill thereof.”

Verse 5 reads, “As birds flying, so will the Lord of hosts defend Jerusalem; defending also he will deliver it; and passing over he will preserve it.”

Dr. Aldersmith had interpreted the lion as being Britain and the young lion as the colonies of the Empire.

The symbol for Britain of course had long been a lion.

And as this postcard from World War 1 illustrates, Britain thought of itself as a lion and its colonies as young lion cubs:

Dr. Aldersmith had interpreted Isaiah 31 v. 5 as referring to some type of flying machine.

Adding 400 to the year 1517 as 400 was an important Biblical number (The Israelites had been enslaved in Egypt for 400 years), Dr. Aldersmith believed that Britain would capture Jerusalem from the Ottoman Turks through the use of a flying machine in the year 1917.

All of this Dr. Aldersmith had written about in his 1898 book.

Of course 5 years after the publication of Aldersmith’s book, the Wright Brothers invented the airplane.

And 14 years after that, airplanes were in use in 1917 but not commonly and most people (particularly those in the Middle East) had never seen one.

Aldersmith’s interpretation of Isaiah 31 was Gen. Allenby’s inspiration.

He would fly planes over Jerusalem and drop notes over the city saying in Arabic, “Surrender the city! Allenby.”

Unbeknownst to Allenby, there was an Arab saying that said, “The Turks will not leave Jerusalem until the river Nile flows in Palestine and the Prophet expels them from the city.”

British troops had been stationed in Egypt prior to 1917 and Lt. Gen. Sir Archibald Murray had built a pipeline to supply fresh Nile water to British troops.

By 1917 the water had arrived along with the troops in Palestine.

The saying spread among the Arabs that year that the River Nile was now flowing in Palestine.

Secondly, Allenby’s airdropped note, when written in Arabic, looked like it said, “Surrender the city! Al Nabi.”

Al Nabi means The Prophet in Arabic.

It looked like the Prophet was calling on them to surrender Jerusalem in notes from the sky.

The Turks immediately started leaving the city when mysterious flying objects started sending messages from Al Nabi.

From the evening of December 8th 1917 and all through the night, Turkish troops were leaving Jerusalem.

By early the following morning of December 9th 1917, all had gone and the Mayor of Jerusalem with a small party came under a white flag to surrender the keys of the city.

The formal surrender was accepted by General O’ Shea on behalf of Gen. Allenby.

Gen. Allenby himself took the official ceremonial surrender two days later on December 11th 1917.

Interestingly enough the evening of December 8th to the day of December 9th 1917 fell on the 24th of the Hebrew month of Kislev on the Jewish calendar that year.

The 24th of Kislev also known as Hanukkah was the day the Maccabees overthrew the Syrian Greeks and turfed out their idols from the Temple of Jerusalem in 167 BC.

Things seemed to have come full circle that year of 1917 the Controller of The Golem reflected.

And now what might this year 2017 bring? he wondered.

He felt an urge to talk to his friend Miranda.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday December 4th


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South African Artist SAREJESS and The Ship From Hades

August 5, 2017 at 3:30 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

The great South African Artist SAREJESS was having another strange dream.

But this wasn’t like the others he had been having recently.

The other dreams he had were somehow related to time- a dream about an hourglass being overturned by mermaids, a dream about a sundial that was able to operate at night during the moonlight, a dream about a railway watch that hung between the lovely breasts of a beautiful blonde brothel girl who worked in a Wild West saloon during the days of America’s Old West, a dream about a cuckoo clock where the cuckoo bird that came out of it alternated between the faces of Orson Welles and the faces of an Egyptian Pharaoh, a dream about a giant hamster standing atop the clock tower of Big Ben at Westminster where a cloud in the shape of Vincent Price’s face in the moonlight appeared above.

And those other dreams (about things relating to time) had compelled him to paint pictures.

This particular dream was about a picture that he had already painted.

The Ship From Hades

In this painting, he had been assisted by his two young apprentices Jody and Joshua.

A friend of his from Canada had said the ship in the painting reminded him of the sort of ship that Hades the Greek god of the Underworld would sail should he choose to sail in the 7 Seas above his netherworld realm.

In this dream, SAREJESS was aboard a modern ship.

There was a heavy strange misty fog at sea and this ship from Hades was sailing towards the modern ship in whose bridge room he was standing.

He heard a bunch of people speaking excitedly in a language that sounded to him like Russian.

Meanwhile aboard the Russian Navy ship The Saint Vladimir that was currently in the Mediterranean Sea not far from Tel Aviv on Israel’s coastline:

“Do you see it, Captain?” The ship’s navigator asked the captain of the Saint Vladimir.

“I do,” the Captain of the Saint Vladimir replied as he looked through his binoculars and saw the Ship From Hades from SAREJESS’ painting approach.

Meanwhile in his office in Jerusalem, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu read an email and then said to one of his aides, “Israel may be in a state of total war later this month.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday August 5th

To check out paintings by the great South African artist SAREJESS for yourself, please visit this site:


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The Creature From Outer Space

December 9, 2016 at 4:52 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

The Creature From Outer Space

The creature from outer space who had arrived on Earth on Pearl Harbor Day was now staying in a 5-star hotel in Jerusalem. He had a room with an excellent view of the Temple Mount.

He was feeling somewhat famished after his long journey across the universe.

God (and also the Devil) knows he wasn’t as young as he used to be, the billions of years old creature thought to himself.

Yep, he was hungry all right.

But what he liked to eat would probably draw attention to himself if he went out.

So he decided to order in.

After sitting at a computer and hacking his way into a Cayman Islands bank account, he made a billion dollar donation to the Clinton Foundation.

In return, Planned Parenthood (one of Hillary’s biggest supporters) flew in a bunch of aborted foetuses and special delivered them to the demonic creature’s room for him to eat.

After eating 33 score and six foetuses, the demonic creature burped contentedly and went on to his next order of business- destroying some Muslim mosques that sat inconsiderately on top of the Temple Mount.

Whoever was now the owner of Solomon’s Ring had summoned him from his place at the far edges of the Universe to come and rebuild Solomon’s Temple.

Trouble is that there were currently Muslim mosques sitting atop the site so they’d have to be gotten rid of.

What was the signal sent out into space at lesser demonic speed to summon him to Earth to start rebuilding Solomon’s Temple?

It was what Howard Cosell might have called The Blasphemy On The Basilica had he still been alive.

For on December 8th (the Feast of the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary) 2015, a New Age light show worshipping the goddess known as Gaia and showing a bunch of demonically possessed looking animals had been cast on to the pillars of Saint Peter’s Basilica to mark the beginning of Pope Francis’ Jubilee Year of Mercy.

Now the Jubilee Year of Mercy was over.

And the period of an unusual form of Justice was about to begin.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday December 8th


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Netanyahu and Dr. Cadbury Rocher

October 20, 2016 at 4:16 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Espionage, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

Netanyahu and Dr. Cadbury Rocher

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was on the telephone with Set Enterprises’ resident mad scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher.

“Dr. Rocher, the entire state of Israel is grateful that you have managed to come up with an antidote to Polonium-210 poisoning,” Netanyahu said, “it has saved the life of one of our best Mossad agents the Controller of the Golem. Although we have put out the word he died so as to throw the ancient Babylonian Vampiress Lilith off the scent.”

“You’re very welcome, Mr. Prime Minister,” Dr. Rocher helped himself to some kosher popcorn,”of course I’d use the antidote on anyone for the right price.”

“Yes, I know you would, Dr. Rocher, ” Netanyahu acknowledged, “of course the State of Israel could not afford your price. So I had to put in an emergency call to Baron Rothschild. He was somewhat miffed but agreed to put up the appropriate shekels. Although he was angry about having to cancel this month’s annual masquerade party sex orgy on his estate that was so carefully re-enacted in Stanley Kubrick’s 1999 film Eyes Wide Shut which resulted in Kubrick’s sudden death 4 days after he showed the final cut to Warner Brothers Pictures. The Baron couldn’t afford to pay both your fee and the cost of hosting this year’s party. Both the ET gray Gali-Gula (who’s possessed by the spirit of Roman Emperor Caligula ) and Renfield R. Renfield are quite miffed that the party has been cancelled I understand.”

“Yes, Renfield has really been bitching about it the past few days,” Dr. Rocher sighed, “he was looking forward to having his buns tomatoed by Sherrielock Holmes who’d be wearing the jade mask of the Buddhist mother goddess Kwan Yin as she did it.”

“Yes, well, Kubrick would probably have a field day with that one if he were still alive,” the Prime Minister thanked Rocher again and put the phone down.

Netanyahu sighed.

He too had been looking forward to this year’s annual Rothschild masquerade party sex orgy.

Meanwhile in New York City, Hillary’s husband Bill Clinton was openly blubbering and sobbing over the cancellation of this year’s annual Rothschild masquerade party sex orgy.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday October 20th


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October 13th, Vampiric Knights-Templar and Russia

October 13, 2016 at 3:40 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Espionage, International Intrigue, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Russian President Vladimir Putin gazed down at the document in front of him.

As he did so, the Russian leader was gripped with a profound metaphysical question.

Where he wondered, did God’s work end and the Devil’s work begin?

Well, he was about to find out.

He took a pen and signed the document.

. . .

Vatican Cardinal Walter Kasper was about to impart his apostolic blessing on a same sex marriage ceremony.

The happy couple were a pair of vampiric Knights-Templar who managed to escape French King Philip !V’s onslaught against the Knights-Templar and their grandmaster Jacques de Molay on Friday, October 13th 1307.

The pair fleeing the king’s guard were able to get themselves turned into vampires through a bite on the neck from vampiress Marguerite de Fleur de Bel.

11 other Knights-Templar were likewise bitten on the same day by the same vampiress and became vampires.

Now after centuries of living together, the romantically inclined Knights-Templar vampiric couple were about to get their union sanctioned by the Church.

Cardinal Kasper used a footnote in Pope Francis’ document Amoris Laetitia to perform the ceremony.

Bill Clinton acted as Best Man via teleconferencing and Hillary Clinton served as Maid of Honour.

Sir Elton John via teleconferencing performed his own piano melody for the occasion Smile On Jacques de Molay (to the tune of Goodbye Norma Jean and Goodbye England’s Rose).

. . .

The demon Asmodeus was smoking his 1307th cigarette of the day while sitting atop the Temple Mount and drinking bottles of Polonium-210 laced Scotch whisky just to show everyone he could do it.

“What a boastful wag,” the demon Azazel thought to himself as he planted Hell’s flag atop the Temple Mount.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday October 13th


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Polonium-210 Will Ruin A Glass of Scotch

October 12, 2016 at 4:12 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Espionage, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

MI-6 Agent Diablos Nocturna was off to his meeting with the Mossad agent called the Controller of the Golem.

They were to meet in a pub in central London to discuss certain geopolitical happenings involving Russia and the Middle East.

When he opened the door to his room, standing there was the Phoenician vampiress Ashtoreth (looking not a day over 30) wearing a lovely pink evening dress.

She bit Diablos on the neck and drew him back into the apartment.

His meeting would be delayed.

, . .

The Controller of the Golem was sitting in the George and Dragon Pub sipping a glass of Scotch and soda.

A red-headed woman in a low-cut black evening dress and carrying a tray of pretzels bent over in front of him showing off her front assets.

“Pretzel, sir?” she smiled a smile flashing her white vampiric incisors.

But the Controller’s eyes were elsewhere, “Don’t mind if I do. I’ve also got a hankering for coconuts for some reason.”

“So does half the city of London,” she continued smiling as she dropped the vial of Polonium-210 in his Scotch and soda.

The Babylonian vampiress Lilith moved her backwards assets in a most delectable fashion as she walked away from the Controller.

The Controller sipped his Scotch and soda, screamed “El Shaddai!” and promptly keeled over.

“You see, Harold,” some constipated looking old bat of a wife nagged her sheepish looking husband a few tables away, “I was right not to let you take a pretzel from that shameless hussy. That could be you lying on the floor right now.”

“A pity it wasn’t,” the henpecked husband thought to himself.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday October 12th


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