ET Gray Gali-Gula Encounters The Black Dragon

April 2, 2019 at 10:12 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, Spy Tales, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

The ET gray Gali-Gula was sitting on the beach at Vancouver’s English Bay drinking bottles of Molson Canadian beer.

He had found an old fashioned dictionary on the beach (books along with encyclopedias which were no longer used in the age of the Internet).

Gali-Gula was surprised to see that when he looked up the word “Sleazebag” in the dictionary that Canadian Privy Council clerk Michael Wernick’s picture was there.

This depressed Gali-Gula as it reminded him of the SNC-Lavalin scandal in which his good buddy Justin Trudeau was involved.

A scandal which probably wouldn’t have happened if his good buddy Justin still had access to his pot smoking desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever and was able to inhale the prickly little creature’s exhaled pot smoke.

For Justin was only able to see Gali-Gula (an ET gray from the planet Nibiru who was possessed by the ghost of the late earthling ancient Roman Emperor Caligula) when he inhaled pot smoke.

But thanks to Canada stupidly arresting Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou on behalf of the U.S. government last December 1st, Chinese government operatives had in retaliation kidnapped Justin’s pot smoking cactus plant.

For a while, the prickly little fellow had been held captive in Calypso’s Bosom a Brigadoon style mystical village hippy commune on the Sechelt Peninsula which only emerged from its pot smoking mystical haze once every 7 years to appear to mortal eyes.

Seeing as how the cactus seemed to be enjoying his environment a little too much, it was moved to a Chinese Government Re-Education camp for transgendered Uighurs in the Xinjiang region of China where cannabis and pot smoking was definitely not allowed.

Seeing as how Justin was deprived of his access to pot smoke through the cactusnapping and captivity of Strawberry Fields Forever, he was unable to see and hear Gali-Gula for advice.

Now whenever Justin set out to make an ass of himself which was quite often, Gali-Gula would advise him not to do it.

When Justin listened to Gali-Gula’s advice, he didn’t make an ass of himself.

When he refused to heed Gali-Gula’s advice, he always made an ass out of himself.

But when Strawberry Fields Forever was kidnapped, Gali-Gula was invisible to Canada’s Prime Minister and was unable to warn Justin Trudeau not to pressure his Attorney-General and Justice Minister Jody Wilson-Raybould into intervening to protect the Quebec based construction firm SNC-Lavalin from criminal prosecution.

As such, Justin now found himself embroiled in the biggest political scandal his government had ever faced.

His poll numbers were dropping faster than flies at a Bill Clinton and White House Intern Reunion Convention.

And earlier this evening, both Jody Wilson-Raybould and her friend former Treasury Board President Jane Philpott had been booted off the deck of the Titanic that is the Canadian Federal Liberal Party caucus.

The iceberg of this fall’s Federal election loomed ahead.

And all because a bunch of West Coast potheads in the Vancouver Crown Prosecutor’s office, Canada Customs and the RCMP decided to follow U.S. government orders and arrest Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou.

Speaking of West Coast potheads, almost everyone on the beach at Vancouver’s English Bay could see him.

They waved and asked for autographs.

A Black Dragon suddenly emerged from the waters of English Bay and approached the ET gray.

Most of the potheads could not see him.

“That’s because I have the ability to cloud their minds with rational thought- something their minds cannot handle,” the Black Dragon answered Gali-Gula because he could read his mind, “most U.S. politicians of all political stripes are unable to see me for the same reason.”

“Who are you?” Gali-Gula asked.

“I am the Black Dragon,” the Black Dragon bowed, “Supernatural entity advisor to China’s paramount leader.”

“I’m Gali-Gula, former ET gray advisor to Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau,” the little extraterrestrial looked sad.

“I know,” the Black Dragon smiled, “I advised Xi Jinping to abduct Strawberry Fields Forever.”

“You!” Gali-Gula looked angry.

“Don’t worry,” the Black Dragon breathed fire reassuringly, “he’s being held in a pot free zone- a government re-education camp for transgendered Uighurs in Xinjiang.”

At that moment a news story about transgenders broke on a nearby pothead’s radio.

The B.C. Human Rights Commission had recently fined somebody for saying that a transgendered political candidate had been born a biological male.

In response to the huge fine, genetically created satyr serial killer Pan Goatee had flown in from Alberta and had beheaded all the members of the B.C. Human Rights Commission.

He then put all the severed heads under the bedsheets in a bed owned by a transgendered Hollywood producer in Los Angeles along with an old autographed photo of Marlon Brando as the Godfather and an old autographed photo of 1960s TV star Mr. Ed The Talking Horse.

The producer screamed when he woke up in bed this morning and found all the items, the radio announcer noted.

“So you’ve come to gloat about holding Strawberry Fields Forever hostage?” Gali-Gula turned his attention back to the supernatural visitor from China.

“Yes,” the Black Dragon roasted some hot dogs for a bunch of potheads who were undergoing the munchies, “I’m actually on my way to Venezuela to give a King Henry V style Saint Crispin’s Day speech to 120 Chinese soldiers there who have joined 100 Russian soldiers there. Buenos Nochos.”

Gali-Gula whose Spanish wasn’t as good as the Black Dragon suddenly felt a craving for some good nachos.

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Meng Sues As Justin Slips, Renfield Saved By Lepardia Once Again

March 4, 2019 at 11:56 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Politics, Romance, Spy Tales, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

Last Friday, the Canadian Federal Government announced that it would be going ahead with the extradition case against Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou.

Today the Chinese government in Beijing formally charged Canadians Michael Kovrig and Michael Spavor with espionage.

“A mere coincidence? Hardly,” British MP Renfield R. Renfield told BBC Radio quoting a statement that the narrator of the early 1970s film Chariots of The Gods often made throughout the course of the movie.

In addition to public moves by the Chinese government, it was also doing some private ones.

Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s pet marijuana smoking desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever (who had been abducted by Chinese vampiress Mei-ling Manchu the daughter of Dr. Fu Manchu shortly after Meng Wanzhou’s arrest) had been moved from the mystical pot smoking hippy commune of Calypso’s Bosom on British Columbia’s Sechelt Peninsula to a Uighur re-education camp for Uighur transgender transsexuals in China’s Xinjiang region where pot smoking was strictly prohibited.

There videos of Strawberry Fields Forever undergoing pot withdrawal symptoms while being surrounded by Uighur equivalents of Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner would be emailed and/or text messaged to Justin on his private server every day.

“A most sublime form of torture,” a smiling supernatural entity known as the Black Dragon told a smiling Chinese Communist paramount leader Xi Jinping over a pot of green tea.

In addition, various Canadians were now disappearing off the streets of Chinese cities.

The Canadian beaver would definitely not be winning any pissing contests with the Chinese dragon.

In addition, Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou had now launched a civil lawsuit against the Canadian Border Services Agency, the RCMP and the Canadian Attorney-General’s Department for violating her constitutional rights on failures of government officials to comply with the rule of law upon her detention, search and interrogation at the Vancouver International Airport on December 1st 2018.

“What probably happened,” British MP Renfield R. Renfield explained to CNN’s Anderson Cooper on the subject, “from my Canadian friends in the know is the sheer egotism and Luciferian self-deification of those who work in the Canadian Border Services Agency. Many males who work for the CBSA are impotent bedwetters with small penises and many females who work for the CBSA are lesbian blowhards who wish they had penises. These serious inflictions cause these people to become Hellhounds and Hellhags when it comes to dealing with members of the general public.”

Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was watching the CNN interview between Renfield and Cooper when he received his first video from the Uighur re-education camp in Xinjiang as a text message.

The video showed a Uighur transgender accidentally sitting on the desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever and then standing up singing those old Culture Club Boy George lyrics of the early 1980s, “Do you really want to hurt me…?”.

“Poor Strawberry Fields Forever,” Justin wept, “He can’t stand listening to any songs or music past 1969.”

The Black Dragon then arrived on the scene singing,

“… we haven’t had that spirit here since 1969…
… we are all just prisoners here of our own device…
… You can check out any time you like
But you can never leave.”

Some burnt Eagle feathers fell down on top of the desert cactus plant.

. . .

In addition to foreign troubles with China, Justin was also having domestic troubles at home in Canada.

Canadian Treasury Board President Jane Philpott had just resigned from the Trudeau cabinet earlier today Monday March 4th 2019 as her reaction to the SNC-Lavalin scandal in which members of the Prime Minister’s Office had tried to pressure then Canadian Justice Minister and Attorney-General Jody Wilson-Raybould into dropping a criminal prosecution case against the Quebec-based construction company SNC-Lavalin.

Trudeau had just re-shuffled his cabinet last Friday in reaction to Jody Wilson-Raybould resigning as Veterans’ Affairs Minister back on February 12th and now he would have to undertake another cabinet shuffle.

Trudeau fell asleep and had a dream that he was tap dancer Fred Astaire with both Ginger Rogers and Rita Hayworth leaving the stage without him.

Justin then did a solitary tap dance as he sang, “I’m doing the cabinet shuffle. Oh yeah, I’m doing the cabinet shuffle” as he shuffled his feet.

Justin then slipped on a banana peel and fell off stage while doing the shuffle.

He was immediately eaten by a Black Dragon who already had in his stomach a desert cactus plant undergoing marijuana smokers’ withdrawal.

. . .

A gay Argentinian Jesuit priest stood outside the British House of Commons holding Punch and Judy puppets with toy chainsaws in both their puppet hands.

The Jesuit was going to use the two respective puppets and the four respective toy chainsaws to assassinate British MP Renfield R. Renfield as he exited the Commons.

The priest had been ordered by one of his superiors in the Vatican to assassinate the British Transhumanist MP.

As the priest stood there, a leopard suddenly lunged at him.

The leopard ripped him to shreds.

Like most contemporary Jesuit priests, the now ripped to pieces assassin was a modernist liberal progressive Marxist who didn’t really believe in the existence of the Supernatural.

Had he done so, he might have paid heed to the warning of Peter Whitstable the Fox Mulder of Interpol that there was a were-leopard (a person able to shapeshift into the form of a leopard) that had been haunting the streets of London the past few years.

. . .

British MP Renfield R. Renfield left the Commons where he had spent the day in his parliamentary office being interviewed by news networks from around the world.

As such his spirit advisors the ghosts of Orson Welles and Winston Churchill had taken the day off visiting the Tate Gallery.

Renfield looked around for his date for this evening Lepardia Marango who was the Cultural Attache at the South African Embassy in London.

Then he saw her:

She looked resplendent.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday March 4th
2019

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Semiramis and Dracul, An ET Gray and Justin Trudeau

February 27, 2019 at 11:56 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mythology, News, Politics, Technology, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )


Semiramis the Queen of Babylon plays an Adolf Hitler speech on the radio

Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing had once again gone back in time to February 1944 a few months before the D-Day invasion of Normandy in pursuit of the time travelling Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau vampire officer Franz Kohler.

He was once again operating in an Orson Welles black and white film space-time dimension as he time travelled using the Houdini-Tesla-Welles-Lamarr magic lantern prototype film projector.

Tonight he found himself in a London England hotel room on the date of February 27th 1944 a few months before the D-Day invasion of Normandy.

The room was registered to Semiramis the Queen of Babylon.

As Semiramis sat there looking incredibly sexy in a tight blouse and tight skirt, she was playing on the radio a speech Adolf Hitler was delivering to a Let’s Make Germany Great Again rally in Berlin:

Hitler was telling the German people what to do in the event of an allied invasion of Nazi occupied Europe.

Now Dracul Van Helsing’s German was a little rusty (much like a harp playing talking rooster character who appeared on a Canadian children’s TV show The Friendly Giant that he watched as a kid) but he was pretty sure Der Fuhrer was saying 😈,

“Ve shall fight in France, ve shall fight on the seas and the oceans, ve shall fight on the beaches, ve shall fight on the landing grounds, ve shall fight in the fields and in the streets, ve shall fight in the hills, ve shall never surrender…”

“So Van Helsing,” Semiramis smiled at him, “it appears Der Fuhrer is a plagiarist among his many other charming attributes.”

“That appears to be the case,” Van Helsing agreed.

Before the evening was over, Semiramis and Dracul Van Helsing were engaged in some kinky tantric sex.

While in the hotel room next door, Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau was phoning down to room service complaining that the sausages and sauerkraut he was getting in England didn’t taste as good as what he got over in Germany.

. . .

The ET gray Gali-Gula from the planet Nibiru (who was possessed by the spirit of the ancient earthling Roman Emperor Caligula) sat in a chair drowning his sorrows in a bottle of beer:

He wondered if his severe drinking problem was starting to affect his liver as he was starting to look more yellow than gray these days.

The source of all his troubles was that his friend Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau wasn’t able to see him (Gali-Gula) to receive advice.

And the result of his not being able to give Justin advice was causing the Canadian Prime Minister to slide into a political quagmire from which he might not be able to remove himself (not even if Donald Trump threw him a lifeline made up of New York City deli baloney sausages).

And of course the reason Justin was no longer able to see the little ET gray was because he was no longer inhaling pot.

When Justin had his genetically created marijuana pot smoking desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever still available to him in his greenhouse, he was able to go into the greenhouse and inhale the desert cactus plant’s pot exhale and then truthfully told the news media that he didn’t personally smoke pot.

However as a result of the Canadian government arresting Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou at Vancouver International Airport at the behest of the U.S. government, the Chinese government in an act of revenge had sent vampiress Mei-ling Manchu to kidnap Justin’s prickly pot smoking little buddy.

The plant was now being held in a mystical pot smoking 1960s hippy commune that had vanished off the face of the Earth back in July 1969 and only appeared again to human eyes once every 7 years.

As a result of all this, Justin was not able to get wise advice from Gali-Gula since he was unable to see him.

Having once been a Roman Emperor who was slain by his own Praetorian Guard, the Imperial Roman spirit possessed ET gray was a wealth of wisdom on what not to do when governing and ruling.

And now Justin was caught up in the SNC-Lavalin scandal whereby he was accused of trying to persuade his then Minister of Justice and Attorney-General of Canada Jody Wilson-Raybould last year to drop criminal prosecution charges against the Quebec-based construction company SNC-Lavalin on charges of trying to bribe the then Libyan government of Col. Muammar Qaddafi (prior to his overthrow by Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton who now condemn Russia for interfering in U.S. internal politics) a decade ago.

SNC-Lavalin is coincidentally one of the biggest financial donors to the Federal Liberal Party of Canada of which Justin Trudeau is the leader.

Jody Wilson-Raybould did not assent to Justin’s pressure and the court case went ahead.

Last month however Justin had demoted Jody Wilson-Raybould to a lesser cabinet position.

Wilson-Raybould eventually resigned from cabinet and today she testified before a Canadian House of Commons committee on the pressure she faced from the Prime Minister’s office.

Justin (after watching hours of video of Donald Trump telling real whoppers to the media and voters) held a press conference of his own to answer Jody Wilson-Raybould’s charges.

Gali-Gula sat at the back of the press corps and wept.

Visual animation commentary for BBC News of the event was provided by Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster of Set Enterprises who drew a cartoon with his lobster claws of Justin Trudeau throwing Jody Wilson-Raybould under a bus.

This did not bode well for Justin’s image as a self-proclaimed feminist and as a self-proclaimed defender of indigenous aboriginal rights.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday February 27th
2019.

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