Marmalade Montague: Birth of A Legend

April 21, 2020 at 10:04 pm (Comedy, Entertainment, Folklore, Humour, News, Poetry, Science-Fiction, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Marmalade Montague: Birth of A Legend

In a bakery in Paris 
were posters of the mummy Kharis
Who appeared in 1940s mummy movies 
“Cause Imhotep wasn’t of the jazz Swing era groovies”

The bakery was owned by Marmalade Montague 
At the end of the street or in French “la rue”

Marmalade was an eccentric gent 
And because of the Covid-19 lockdown couldn’t pay the rent 
So into the gutter he was thrown
Getting up, he made a moan 

Inside Marmalade something snapped
opening up a genius untapped 
So into the Paris catacombs he descended 
and ran past ancient pipes all upended 
When he emerged again 
he carried a hen
and wore a silver wig
while his lips munched upon a fig

He was dressed from head to toe in Louis XIV era attire
So it was a good thing that his pants weren’t on fire 
He proclaimed to empty streets 
devoid of all and no words of greets
“I am Marmalade Montague court scientist to the Court of Louis Quatorze”
“So I say to you, Paris, open your doors”

But no doors opened and Marmalade Montague went back to the catacombs 
A world of poor reception for many smart phones 
For Marmalade Montague had gone mad
If he had any friends, they might have felt sad 
But as it was Marmalade had gone from good to bad.

And on this April day a legend was born 
In a world that was by a virus torn
No Sacrifice of the Mass was being said 
Masons hoped to make of Notre Dame a temple of lead
And in Rome, the ex-Vicar of Christ was flaming Bolshevik red 

Marmalade Montague had ceased to be a baker 
In his mind he had become a Louis Quatorze court alchemist faker 
And the world would never again be the same
Although the mainstream media would continue to be lame.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday April 21st 2020.

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A Bastille Day Limerick

July 14, 2013 at 7:07 pm (Poetry) (, , , , , , , , , , )

There was a young man from Castile

who was there that day at the Bastille

when the Revolution started

and Robespierre farted

and royal Louis’  head was brought to heel.

-A limerick written
 by Christopher
 Sunday July 14th
 2013
 The  224th
 Anniversary
 of the start
 of the
 French Revolution.

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