Warrior Princesses Spray Holy Water On Kremlin Meeting Rooms

September 16, 2022 at 10:49 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan is back home in Seoul, South Korea ready to perform with her cello at a classical concert

This past Tuesday September 13th and past Wednesday September 14th Hyung Grace Kwan had been in Astana Kazakhstan killing evil vampires and vampiresses who were attending Astana’s 7th Interfaith Congress.

Then yesterday Thursday September 15th Hyung and her ancestress the immortal princess Kwan Yin were spraying Holy Water around every single Kremlin meeting room in Moscow.

That is because Xi’s supernatural spirit advisor the Black Dragon was supposed to meet with Putin’s supernatural spirit advisor the demon Moloch (who was appearing to Putin in the guise of the Archangel Michael) in the Kremlin on that date.

The Holy Water that Hyung and Kwan used was from a cache of bottles of Holy Water that had been personally blessed by Pope St. Pius X (who was Pope from August 4th 1903 to August 20th 1914).

St. Pius X was the Pope who condemned the Modernist heresy (The Modernist heresy denies the Virgin Birth, Incarnate Deity, Substitionary Atonement For Humanity’s Sins by Dying On The Cross, Bodily Resurrection and 2nd Coming of Jesus Christ).

Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) is the apotheosis of the Modernist heresy.

That’s why Joe Biden’s Oval Office which is thoroughly doused in Pope Francis’ blessed Holy (?) Water (when it isn’t being doused by Joe Biden’s sulphurous bowel movements) is able to attract every single demon, devil, fallen angel and unclean spirit on the planet.

So as a result of the Holy Water doused on the Kremlin and its meeting rooms, the Black Dragon and Moloch (posing as Michael the Archangel) were unable to meet.

Their human operatives Communist China’s paramount leader Xi Jinping and Russian President Vladimir Putin were able to meet however at Samarkand Uzbekistan for the Shanghai Cooperation Organization summit.

At a sideline meeting between Xi and Putin at the SCO Summit, Xi personally humiliated the Russian leader for losing the war in Ukraine.

Although that was nothing to the personal humiliation that Xi suffered Wednesday night at the hands of a holographic image of British MP Renfield R. Renfield at the Astana state banquet for Xi.

Hyung Grace Kwan in the meantime had received a personal request from an admirer (a Calgary based geopolitical analyst) to play Antonio Vivaldi’s Spring Allegro from The Four Seasons at tonight’s cello concert.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday September 16th
2022.

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Xi In Kazakhstan

September 14, 2022 at 10:58 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

The Greek goddess Hera was in Astana Kazakhstan today.
As was Pope Francis and Communist China’s supreme despot Xi Jinping.

Hera was visiting Astana today because she had heard that Zeus would be attending the Kazakhstani 7th InterFaith Congress.

Zeus was most definitely in Astana (the Kazakh capital currently suffers under the revolting name Nur-Sultan named after a Kazakhstani politician and former President Nursultan Nazarbayev).

(Editor’s Note from Renfield R. Renfield: Due to the efforts of a Calgary based geopolitical analyst and blogger who has been pointing out in his blog posts the past few days that the name Astana reflects good taste while the name Nur-Sultan reflects bad taste , the government of Kazakhstan announced earlier today that it would be changing the Kazakh capital’s name back to Astana).

Zeus was here to chase a beautiful Jordanian princess (a distant cousin of Jordan’s King Abdullah II) who was here in Astana attending the InterFaith Congress on behalf of the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan.

After cornering the Jordanian princess and asking her to come back to his palace on Mount Olympus where Zeus told her, “I’ll show you the way I ride my bulls”, the Jordanian princess shouted “Revenge for Ixion!” and kicked Zeus in the groin with her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes.

As Zeus lay on the ground groaning over his groin, Hera came by and hit Zeus over the head with the world’s largest watermelon that had been sent to the InterFaith Congress as a gift from former U.S. President Barack Obama.

Zeus now lay unconscious in a pool of Neo-Bolshevik red coloured juice while the ghost of Josef Stalin and the vampire Lev Tomi (who in his mortal life had been Leon Trotsky) sang that old Platters hit song “Oh yes I’m the Great Pretender…”

And speaking of pretenders and imposters, Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) had to google Who Was Jesus Christ? prior to giving a speech because the so-called Holy Father had forgotten who He was.

And also in Astana Kazakhstan on this day was Communist China’s paramount leader and all round despotic tyrant Xi Jinping.

Xi’s visit to Astana Kazakhstan on this day was his first trip outside Communist China ever since he had released bat virus from the Wuhan Institute of Virology and had begun the plandemic.

“Unholy bat virus, Batman,” a talking robin spoke as he flew down on top of Xi’s hair and crapped all over him.

An immediate search was underway to find some PH Unbalanced Shampoo to shampoo the robin crap out of Xi’s hair.

A bottle was found in The Homicidal Sasquatch Pub in downtown Astana.

Sitting in the pub was the great Irish-Jewish American science-fiction writer George Finneganburg who was talking to the Russian made cyborg sex robot Sophia.

Sophia had been invented by the former East German Stasi scientist Dr. Nicht Werhoffen (who now worked for the Russian FSB).

The cyborg sex robot Sophia had made out with Dracul Van Helsing on a roundtable in the Kazakh Palace of Religion in Astana in 2013.

An incident that was recorded in a geopolitical analyst’s blog post back in 2013 (although at that time the geopolitical analyst lived in Vancouver and not Calgary).

“You mean to say,” George Finneganburg quickly downed his beer, “that Dracul Van Helsing came up with a cyborg sex robot before I did? How the Hell am I going to break the news to Akira?”.

Once the robin crap had been washed out of Xi’s hair, he then met with Kazakh government officials.

After his Astana visit, Xi would be flying to the Russian capital of Moscow for a Kremlin summit meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin in order to discuss the war in Ukraine.

As such, Xi had brought along his Supernatural spirit advisor the Black Dragon to Astana and the winged demon serpent covered in charcoal black would also be accompanying Xi to Moscow.

There the Black Dragon would be meeting with Putin’s supernatural advisor “Saint Michael the Archangel” (who was not really Saint Michael the Archangel but was really the demon Moloch posing as the Archangel Michael in an effort to fool the megalomaniacal would-be Deutero-Czar Peter the Great aka Putin).

Kwan Yin the immortal princess (venerated as the Goddess of Mercy in some sects of Buddhism) and her descendant the South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan were keeping tags on Xi in Astana and would be following him to Moscow for his meeting with Putin.

Xi was now attending a state banquet in his honour with Kazakh government leaders in Astana.

Before Xi sat down at the banquet table, a small robotic Paddington Bear (called Paddy O’ Marmalade), who had been invented by Set Enterprises’ scientist Dr. Marmalade Montague, put a combination of honey, marmalade and Crazy Glue down on Xi’s chair.

When Xi sat down, he got hopelessly stuck and couldn’t get up again.

As members of the Kazakh honour guard struggled to get Xi free from the chair that his pants were hopelessly glued to, the Paddington Bear robot named Paddy O’ Marmalade came and threw a Peking Duck and Thousand Year Old Egg laced cream pie in his face.

The cream pie had been specially prepared and baked by Harvey Tallbanger the 6 foot 8 tall invisible Welsh pooka bunny rabbit who worked as a secret agent for Set Enterprises.

Between his butt stuck to the chair and his face covered in Peking Duck and Thousand Year Old Egg cream pie, Xi did not really look like a great leader.

It was at that moment that the ghost of Winston Churchill (representing the British government) presented Xi with a Winnie the Pooh t-shirt.

Of course Xi could not put it on because of his current predicament.

Just then a holographic image of British MP Renfield R. Renfield appeared and started to sing to the tune of the Beatles song Hey Jude:

“Hey Xi, don’t ask me why
Take a sad song and make it badder
Remember vaccines get under your skin
Changing your DNA
Until you become Transhuman, human, human, human, human,…”

Renfield was broadcasting from the living room of the Set Estate mansion in London, England.

In the background could be heard the sound of Amadeus Emanon opening the door to pick up the Chinese Food delivery they had ordered from a Chinese restaurant.

“Hey Amadeus,” Renfield piped up, “Ask the delivery guy how do you say “Xi Jinping, you are a total loser” in Chinese?”.

Amadeus asked.

And the Chinese Food delivery guy answered adding and ad libbing a few nasty pejoratives of his own.

Renfield spoke in perfect Mandarin (with some Cantonese thrown in for good measure) telling Xi that he was a total loser and throwing in the delivery guy’s added ad libbed nasty pejoratives of his own.

Xi was livid with rage although you couldn’t tell because his face was covered in Peking Duck and Thousand Year Old Egg cream pie while his bottom was still being pulled away from the butt locking combination of honey, marmalade and Crazy Glue on his chair.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday September 14th
2022.

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Baal In Kazakhstan

September 13, 2022 at 10:58 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

The demon Baal in Kazakhstan

The ghost of Cecil B. DeMille had taken a technicolour photo of the demon Baal in Kazakhstan.

The demon Baal was the object of veneration and worship at a human sacrifice ceremony at a site just north of the Kazakh capital of Astana (now called Nur-Sultan).

Due to his bum knee, Jorge Mario Bergoglio (aka Pope Francis) was unable to attend the ceremony in hopes of improving ecumenical relations with all religions and all deities.

A backdrop choreographer for the U.S. Democratic Party was present to get ideas for Joe Biden’s next major speech.

He was the same choreographer who had done the Nazi colours blood red backdrop for Biden’s speech in Philadelphia back on September 1st of this year 2022.

Samhain Cardinal Salaman was a member of the Vatican entourage accompanying Francis to this Inter-Faith Summit in Astana.

Cardinal Salaman was examining the Cecil B. DeMille technicolour photograph alongside South Korean vampire huntress Hyung Grace Kwan.

Hyung had spent the day locating evil vampires and vampiresses (who were attending the summit) in their coffins and beheading them and staking them through the heart.

She was to vampires and vampiresses what the Covid-19 vaccines were to previously healthy and strong young athletes (they were all dropping dead on the spot as a result).

“So,” Samhain Cardinal Salaman sipped his tea, “I understand you’re a direct descendant of the immortal princess Kwan Yin.”

“That is correct,” Hyung nodded.

“And she’s venerated as the goddess of mercy by various branches of Buddhism,” the Cardinal helped himself to a mooncake.

“Yes, that’s true,” Hyung said, “My ancestress is immortal (having drunk from springs of immortality from a certain mountain in a certain valley in China) but she doesn’t consider herself a goddess although others do.”

“As opposed to George Soros, Bill Gates and Klaus Schwab who all consider themselves gods even though others don’t,” Samhain mused aloud.

“Yes, very true,” Hyung poured more tea.

“You know I know nothing whatsoever about most religions except a smattering of some knowledge of kabbalah,” Cardinal Salaman explained, “Which is why Pope Francis had me baptised, then confirmed, then ordained a deacon, then ordained a priest, then consecrated a bishop and then created a Cardinal all on the same day.”

“I see,” Hyung smiled at the admission.

“So, tell me,” the Cardinal once again took a close look at the ghost of Cecil B. DeMille’s technicolour photograph of the demon Baal, “Are Baal and Moloch one and the same god?”.

“Many theologians and professors of Classical Middle Eastern History seem to think so,” the scholarly vampire huntress answered, “but in fact Baal and Moloch are demonic twin brothers.”

“There are twins among demons?” Cardinal Salaman was surprised.

“A few, yes,” Hyung nodded.

“So, is Moloch in Kazakhstan as well?” The Cardinal inquired.

“No, he’s in Moscow serving as an advisor to Russian President Vladimir Putin,” the vampire huntress answered.

“Really?” Salaman helped himself to another mooncake.

“Although Moloch is posing as the Archangel Michael to Putin,” Hyung explained, “so Putin thinks he was following Saint Michael the Archangel’s advice when he invaded Ukraine in February to capture the capital of Kyiv and then the rest of Ukraine ”

“Now I may not know too much religion especially Catholicism,” The Cardinal took another sip of tea, “but I do know that Saint Michael the Archangel is considered one of the Patron Saints of the City of Kyiv. Did Putin really think that Michael would ask him to invade and conquer a city of which he’s a Patron Saint?”.

“Well, I don’t think Putin really knows much about Ukrainian history and culture and tradition,” Hyung answered.

“In that he’s a lot like the late Soviet dictator Josef Stalin,” Salaman noted.

“In fairness to Putin,” Hyung pointed out, “He only followed Moloch because Moloch was posing as Saint Michael the Archangel. Whereas Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden and most U.S. Democrats follow the demons Baal and Baphomet even though Baal and Baphomet are appearing as themselves Baal and Baphomet.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday September 13th
2022.

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Kwan Yin and The Goldfish

January 8, 2021 at 11:30 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )


The immortal princess Kwan Yin in the middle of a goldfish pond in a Thai garden complex

The immortal princess Kwan Yin (who was venerated as the goddess of mercy within certain branches of Buddhism) sat in the middle of a goldfish pond in a Thai garden complex.

The goldfish in this pond were likewise immortal.

In fact they had been in various ponds and various fountains all over the world throughout their long lives having been sent there by the monks who owned the garden complex.

But always they eventually returned home to this goldfish pond in this garden complex owned by a group of Thai monks.

One of the places they stayed was the Nephthys Hotel in Cairo.

They had stayed in the hotel fountain lobby from 1949 to 1953.

When they retuned home to this Thai garden complex pond, the biggest of the gold fish vomited forth a skeleton.

The skeleton remained unidentified for years until they cracked the human genetic code in the late 1990s and the early 2000s.

And after DNA tests were done on the skeleton, it was determined that the skeleton belonged to a British businessman who had disappeared at the hotel back in 1949.

On this occasion in the year 2021, one of the goldfish in the pond jumped up on the fountain step in the middle of the pond where the princess Kwan Yin was sitting and after doing a voice impersonation of actor Humphrey Bogart coughed up a very old matchbook.

Of the variety that were once given out in restaurants, bars, lounges, pubs and nightclubs all over the globe during the days and nights and years and decades when cigarette smoking was allowed in public in most places.

People in those days and nights and years and decades often collected these matchbooks (with their matches inside) as souvenirs.

Because the matchbook usually had on its cover the name and logo of the establishment that was handing out the matchbook (usually for free to paying customers who bought food and drink from the establishment) as well as the name of the town or city and country where the establishment was located.

This matchbook had the name Qadshu Bazaar Nightclub Cairo Egypt on it as well as what was presumably the club’s logo.

Kwan Yin opened up the matchbook and discovered written on the inside slip (across from the place where the matches were lined up) the name Asherah as well as the words juniper, cucumber and damask rose which were said to be the ingredients used in resurrecting a leprechaun from the dead or so the matchbook’s previous owner had once written.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday January 8th
2021

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Lightning Strikes Oriental Pearl Tower In Shanghai

August 11, 2020 at 11:19 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was conversing with his friend Amadeus Emanon via Skype.

“So what’s The Hooterville Cannonball up to?” Amadeus asked Renfield.

The Hooterville Cannonball was the name of the London-based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s eco-friendly environmentally friendly cannabis oil powered dirigible airship.

“Well, she was in the Philippines yesterday buying a whole bunch of giant clams for Set’s proposed clam bake in September (unless it’s outlawed by the Boris Johnson government for fear it will violate social distancing),” Renfield was coincidentally eating some West Philippine Sea giant clams as he said this.

“I heard reports from an eccentric Australian named Uncle Ernie that I met in a pub yesterday that, according to the short wave radio that’s hidden in his tin foil hat wearing desert cactus plant that apparently smokes pot according to him, that the Hooterville Cannonball was flying in the direction of mainland China after purchasing the giant clams from Philippine fishermen,” Amadeus helped himself to some marijuana laced oysters.

“That’s true,” Renfield nodded, “Set Enterprises received information that a Chinese Ministry of State Security official wishes to defect to the West and specifically Britain because he apparently enjoys the idea of eating fish and chips while picnicking in the park which is a quaint British pasttime.”

“What inspired him to defect?” Amadeus asked.

“He apparently encountered the legendary immortal Princess Kwan Yin (who’s venerated as a goddess of mercy in some branches of Buddhism) outside a cave in a rural area of southern China and she smiled at him causing him to faint because she was so beautiful,” Renfield explained.

“When did this happen?” Amadeus inquired.

“Yesterday,” Renfield explained, “His old fashioned wireless put in an emergency distress call that was in fact picked up by the short wave radio hidden inside Uncle Ernie’s tin foil hat wearing desert cactus plant that smokes pot and Uncle Ernie’s cactus communicated the message to Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster’s lobster antennae. Since the Hooterville Cannonball happened to be in the vicinity, Set ordered it to China to pick up the defector.”

“I hear China has been undergoing all sorts of extreme weather phenomena the past few months,” Amadeus noted.

“That’s true,” Renfield unveiled a weather map of China he happened to have behind him, “There has been extreme flooding in many parts of China causing many dams to burst which makes the situation even worse.
This past July 28th snow actually fell in the city of Beijing on a hot summer day. Although Chinese Communist party officials denied it was snow because being good Marxists, they deny objective reality. Then yesterday a very bizarre series of unusual looking lightning bolts struck the Oriental Pearl Tower in Shanghai which is the 6th tallest tower in the world. So naturally the China Daily which is the Communist Party of China’s daily English language newspaper immediately issued a story that lightning did not strike the Oriental Pearl Tower.”

“Another denial of reality,” Amadeus commented.

In Beijing, China’s paramount and officially atheist leader Xi Jinping commented to no one in particular, “The Emperor of Heaven is not against me despite all appearances.”

A seagull came down and laid a one thousand year old egg in his hair.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday July 11th
2020.

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Kwan Yin Vs. The CCP

August 10, 2020 at 11:26 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was commenting on the radio about an elderly woman being attacked in Portland, Oregon by Antifa demonstators, “Both Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky and Romanian pastor Richard Wurmbrand had this to say about the nature of Communism, Communism is mass demonic possession. This past weekend an elderly woman in her 70s walking down the street just minding her own business was set upon by a group of demonstrators who were out on the streets rioting and looting and creating mayhem in that nightly spectacle going on in many U.S. cities that the brainless mainstream American media has dubbed “peaceful protests”. She had red paint poured all over her hair and a police CAUTION tape pasted on her mouth while a bunch of loudmouth (undoubtedly lesbian) blowhards shouted “Wear a mask! Wear a mask!”. The fact that these sick deranged bastards think it’s so important to wear a mask just shows what the true critical thinkers and true free thinkers of our day have been saying all along, “Wearing a mandatory face mask has nothing to do with stopping the virus or saving people’s health. It has to do with submission to the Marxist New World Order being planned and foisted upon the world by the planet’s global elitists. If you can get multitudes of people to accept covering their faces in public (which they’ve done!), you can get multitudes of people to accept taking the Mark of The Beast (which is on its way! Bill Gates is working on it.).”

Meanwhile Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer was laying down on her dining room table for some reason or other.

She then started levitating.

When she was 6 feet up off the table (no doubt practicing social distancing), her head started spinning around at 360 degree angles all over the place.

She opened her mouth and frogs and toads started coming out of it.

The cable TV repairman who had entered the house to fix the cable TV stopped dead in his tracks.

He decided to turn and exit.

He’d fix the cable at another time on another day.

Over in Hong Kong, dissidents were being rounded up and arrested under the draconian new Hong Kong Security Laws imposed by the CCP over on mainland China.

Meanwhile Hong Kong’s retired bishop Cardinal Joseph Zen lamented the death of freedom in Hong Kong.

He then went on to criticize the Vatican-Beijing Agreement On The Catholic Church in the People’s Republic of China (that had been negotiated by the American predatory homosexual Cardinal Theodore McCarrick whose other activity mainly consisted of sexually assaulting altar boys and young seminarians).

Bishops in the underground Church in China who were required to join the government founded Chinese Catholic Patriotic Association on orders from Pope Francis (under the terms of the agreement) were required to renounce the Catholic Faith in order to join the Association, Cardinal Zen told the astonished news media who were not aware of the terms of the Vatican-Beijing Agreement (namely because both Beijing and the Vatican were keeping it secret).

An astonished Anderson Cooper asked the demon Asmodeus and the little green frog Nimrod in an interview CNN brass decided not to show on television, “How is it possible that Pope Francis asked bishops in the underground Church to renounce the Catholic Faith in order to join the Patriotic Association?”, Asmodeus answered, “Well, that’s no problem for Pope Francis. Because Francis renounced the Catholic Faith himself years ago.”

Cardinal Zen also told the media assembled, “One of Hong Kong’s most pre-eminent journalists said months ago that the CCP is paying the Vatican $2 billion a year to keep the agreement in place ever since it was signed. What I find most disturbing is not the claim itself but the fact that to this date, the Vatican has still not denied it.”

Meanwhile in mainland China yet another statue of Guanyin (who is also called Kwan Yin), who is venerated as the goddess of mercy in some branches of Buddhism, had been torn down on orders of Xi Jinping and the CCP.

Guanyin was a Chinese princess whom the late Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen noted had developed a deep veneration for Mary the Mother of Jesus after the first Christians entered China after coming east from Assyria.

Kuan Yin’s acts of compassion during her lifetime were noted by everyone.

There were some, the Black Dragon spirit advisor to China’s paramount leader told Xi Jinping, who said that Kwan Yin had drank from a hidden spring of immortality located somewhere in China and had become immortal.

“I have no time for fairy tales,” Xi said as he looked up from reading the latest public statement from his puppet WHO’s Dr. Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus.

Meanwhile outside a cave in a rural part of southern China, a Chinese Ministry of State Security operative was following a woman that villagers had told him was Kwan Yin.

She stood outside a cave.

Kwan Yin turned and smiled at the State Security operative.

The man fainted in response.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday August 10th
2020.

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The Spirit of Apollyon: From Hiroshima To Beirut

August 6, 2020 at 10:34 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Poetry, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

“And they had a king over them, which is the angel of the bottomless pit, whose name in the Hebrew tongue is Abaddon, but in the Greek tongue hath his name Apollyon.”
-The Apocalypse of Saint John 9:11

British MP Renfield R. Renfield read aloud a poem he had written:

Today is the 75th Anniversary of the atomic bombing of Hiroshima
which killed almost 150,000 people
and left others scarred and maimed for life
Plus numerous deaths from cancer over the years

The atomic bomb was given the epithet Little Boy
and was dropped by a B-29 called the Enola Gay
(quite possibly because it was the first LGBTQ2s+ plus
military plane in history)

J. Robert Oppenheimer who helped develop the atomic bomb
remarked upon its creation, a line from the Bhagavad Gita,
“Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.”
Shiva in his most destructive aspect,
that of the Destroyer
whose Hebrew name and equivalent was Abaddon
and whose Greek name and equivalent was Apollyon.

A couple of days ago an explosion 1/10 the size of Hiroshima’s atomic explosion
rocked the city of Beirut Lebanon
killing at least 137 people
and injuring about 5000 others
while dozens more are still missing

The cause was an explosion of ammonium nitrate
stored in a Beirut port warehouse
that had sat there for 6 years
after it had been taken off an impounded sea vessel back in 2013
The Rhosus a Moldovan flagged ship
on its way from Georgia to Mozambique
and had entered Beirut port
after suffering technical problems.

Port officials had been asking court officials for years
for permission to remove the ammonium nitrate from the warehouse
but Lebanese courts acting with the same constipated air of irregularity
that grips the bowels and the minds of their fellow judicial counterparts all over the world
sat and did nothing

The spirit of Apollyon can dance many dances
a dance that’s quick and swift like what happened at Hiroshima
75 years ago
or a dance that’s a slow dance that builds to a crescendo
like what happened in Beirut a couple of days ago
after a 6 year very slow waltz.

-A poem by Renfield R. Renfield

Epilogue:

The Buddhist goddess of mercy Kwan Yin sat and wept when she saw the destruction at Hiroshima 75 years ago on August 6th 1945.

On the beaches of Beirut, Thessalonike of Macedon the immortal mermaid half-sister of Alexander the Great wept when she saw the destructive explosion that rocked Beirut Lebanon on August 4th 2020.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday August 6th 2020.

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Semiramis’ Early Valentine’s Day Present For Dracul While Andrew Cuomo Sacrifices A Pig To Greek God Zeus For Chinese New Year

February 5, 2019 at 11:55 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Gothic, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, love, Mystery, Mythology, News, Politics, Spy Tales, Technology, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


Semiramis: “Happy Valentine’s Day, Mr. Van Helsing.”

“But it isn’t quite Valentine’s Day yet,” Van Helsing looked at his Latin sun dial wrist watch (which didn’t work quite so well at night) as he addressed the immortal Queen of Babylon.

“But it is Chinese New Year,” Semiramis smiled, “so I thought we’d take the Persian magic flying carpet that the ghost of Orson Welles left behind in the hotel and use it to fly to your old home town of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada and have dinner at the Blue Willow Restaurant there at your favourite table alongside the statue of Kwan Yin the Buddhist Mother Goddess of Mercy.”

“Or,” Dracul joked, “we could order take out from Lydo Chinese Food.”

He recounted their TV commercial musical song jingle from his childhood, “4-2-6- 5-0-5-0 (their phone number- Editor’s Note), if you’re hungry call the Lydo… now. Free delivery.”

“Van Helsing, shut up,” Semiramis commanded in a spanking dominatrix tone of voice that turned Dracul on.

. . .

Meanwhile in Washington DC, Donald Trump was giving his State of The (Dis)Union Address as the ghosts of Abraham Lincoln, Jefferson Davis, Robert E. Lee and Ulysses S. Grant watched from the public gallery.

It was deja vu all over again for the quartet.

. . .

In Beijing China, the Black Dragon had arranged for a Lunar New Year celebration for Chinese leader Xi Jinping.

A wild boar with an Apple iPhone in its mouth along with a real apple was brought in on a silver platter.

The wild boar was dressed in the Stars and Stripes of the American flag and the apple (fruit not iPhone) had a miniature Canadian flag on a toothpick along with a marijuana cigarette sticking out of it.

. . .

In the Episcopal Cathedral of Saint John The Divine in New York City, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo was sacrificing a live Vietnamese pot bellied pig to a statue of the Greek god Zeus that had been placed in the Lady Chapel.

Horrified looking holographic images of Miss Piggy and Kermit the frog (projected by the CERN Large Hadron Collidor in Switzerland) looked on in horror.

“Kermit, do something,” Miss Piggy shrieked.

“What can I do?” Kermit answered as he ate flies from a can of sardines whose expiry date had long since expired, “It ain’t easy being green.”

. . .


Sophia the Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom stood alongside a marble bust of Pan the Greek satyr nature god (her one time lover) and addressed the ghost of Orson Welles.

“Do you know how my son Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun is celebrating Chinese New Year in Ireland?” Sophia remarked, “Drunk under several pints of Guinness and a pot of gold.”

“I should have done the same,” Welles’ ghost remarked while suffering an acute case of spectral ectoplasmic indigestion after having ordered the Hungry Ghost Plate Special at Ho Ho’s Chinese Food in the Hub Mall of Edmonton’s University of Alberta campus while a marriage proposal was happening in front of the express food concession stand.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday February 5th
2019.

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Kwan Yin and Kim and Moon and The Surprise “Hollywood” Style Summit

May 26, 2018 at 10:10 pm (Film, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Kwan Yin and Kim and Moon and the Surprise “Hollywood” Style Summit

After Donald Trump threw a temper tantrum and pulled red spider monkeys out of his hair and cancelled the June 12th Singapore Peace Summit in an announcement this past Thursday May 24th, Kwan Yin the Asian Buddhist goddess of mercy had asked Thoth the Egyptian god of wisdom, the moon and magic along with his immortal formerly mortal companion Serena the Time Traveler to go to the Underworld realm of Hades and ask the entity Hades (known to the Romans as Pluto) to release the ghost of the great film director Orson Welles from Purgatory.

In the past, Hades normally had to consult with the earthly Pope of Rome before he could do such things but since the current Pope Francis no longer believed in Purgatory (or even Hell for that matter), he was able to immediately accede to Kwan Yin’s request.

The ghost of Orson Welles left Hades saying, “Paul Masson will sell no wine 🍷 before its time but Hades will release my ghost before my time.”

Thoth and Serena escorted Welles to the DMZ (demilitarized zone) on the Korean Peninsula where Kwan Yin gave Welles a deadline of 48 hours to arrange a surprise “Hollywood” style summit between North Korean leader Kim Jong-un and South Korean President Moon Jae-in.

Welles never followed deadlines much in his mortal life (which is why most American film studios in Hollywood became reluctant to work with him) but what he had failed to do in life, he achieved in death.

The surprise summit happened today Saturday May 26th 2018.

Also present at the surprise summit were Kwan Yin herself as well as the Chinese Communist vampiress Meiling Manchu (who had recently broken with Chinese President Xi Jinping on the grounds he had become a Mao like cult leader and total totalitarian despot) and the Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec.

Kim and Moon agreed to carry on talks for a planned Singapore Peace Summit between Trump and Kim on June 12th.

Meiling and Qonzilqointec were to go to the White House in Washington DC and hold down the Trumpster while the immortal London dominatrix Sherrielock Holmes tomatoed the toupee wearing blowhard’s buttocks with her whip until he agreed to go to the summit as planned.

When Moon and Kim finished their meeting, Orson Welles asked Kwan Yin if it would not be possible for his ghost to remain out of Hades for a while so he could visit London, England 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 of which he had fond memories.

Kwan Yin, Thoth and Serena then text messaged Hades on their Divine Celestial Samsung Galaxy 6 Billion Model Smart Phones and put in a special request for the successful director of the surprise “Hollywood” style summit in the Korean Peninsula’s demilitarized zone to spend some more time out of the realm of Hades.

Hades agreed.

He had no objections.

Especially since Welles was consuming most of the wine 🍷 available in the Underworld to the dismay of other clients and patrons.

Kwan Yin the Buddhist Goddess of Mercy

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday May 26th
2018.

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Apollo and Belvedere In PyeongChang

February 11, 2018 at 11:59 pm (Fantasy, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Apollo and Belvedere In PyeongChang

The Greek god Apollo was attending the 2018 Winter Olympics in PyeongChang.

He was hoping to help bring peace to this troubled part of the world.

Ever since he was brought back from the dead last year, he felt that it was his mission to bring peace to this long-suffering world.

Belvedere the ghost of a ghost white salamander who was a reporter for the Times of London had discovered that Apollo was staying at a hotel in PyeongChang and decided to get an exclusive interview with the Greek deity.

A few weeks before in London when his editors found out that Belvedere knew nothing whatsoever about sports, they immediately assigned him to cover the PyeongChang Winter Olympics.

In Apollo’s room, Belvedere introduced himself.

Apollo agreed to the interview as the Olympian deity thought it might be kind of cool 😎 to be interviewed by the ghost of a ghost white salamander.

Of course Belvedere had not always been like that.

He had once been human having worked as a bartender on Wild West dominatrix Sherrielock Holmes’ Wild Tomatoes and Mushroom Saloon in the Wild West town of Hayden Colorado back in the 1880s.

He had been turned into a ghost white salamander by a time traveling enchantress.

And shortly afterwards, he was run over and killed by a caravan covered wagon heading west whereupon he became the ghost of a ghost white salamander.

Apollo gave Belvedere some of his own background – the background not covered in most classical mythology textbooks.

When the Temple of Apollo at Delphi was destroyed by the Emperor Theodosius the Great in 390 AD, Apollo became severely depressed.

So depressed in fact that he started having suicidal thoughts and of course being an immortal, it was rather difficult to commit suicide.

He happened to run into the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith and Apollo told her of his misery.

Lilith happened to have in her possession some poisoned Babylonian grapes 🍇 that were capable of killing an immortal so she gave Apollo some and he promptly died in the year 390 AD.

Apollo was buried on Mount Parnassus after his death and his tomb became lost to both god and man after a small quake shook Mount Parnassus.

Then in the year 2012 AD on the night of the summer solstice that year just after sundown, Apollo’s tomb on Mount Parnassus was discovered by the French archaeologist vampire Dr. Pompidou De Gaulle (whose archaeological expeditions were sponsored by the Egyptian vampiress Isis).

Apollo’s father Zeus thereupon came out of the shadows where he had been since his son’s death and tried to find somebody who could bring Apollo back from the dead.

Then in December 2016 Zeus met Set Enterprises’ chief scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher and asked him if he could find an antidote to the poisonous Babylonian grapes 🍇 of Lilith and bring his son Apollo back from the dead.

In early January 2017, Dr. Rocher succeeded in bringing Apollo back from the dead.

Returned to life, Apollo thought it should be his mission to bring peace to the world- something difficult to do in a world where the likes of Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un were in power.

Making it even more difficult, Apollo’s brother Ares (the Greek god of war) was hopping back and forth between different spots on the planet sowing conflict and wars.

And Ares was doing it in earnest, very ticked off at the fact that his role in starting and trying to continue the First World War had been exposed in a movie 🎥 that came out last year- Wonder Woman with Gal Gadot.

Then in a further troubling development, Apollo’s brother Hephaestus (the Greek god of metalworking and the forge) had started building ballistic missiles for Kim Jong-un last year making for successful ballistic missile tests that ticked off Donald Trump and caused the latter to tweet even more than he did.

“So given this environment,” Belvedere scribbled with his ghostly pen in his ghostly notebook 📓, “how do you intend to bring peace to this region?”.

“Well,” Apollo poured some Red Bull energy drink into his glass of ambrosia, “I’ve met with Kwan Yin who is an immortal princess worshipped as the Buddhist Goddess of Mercy and compassion here in Asia and discussed my plans with her. In fact, Kwan Yin met with Kim Yo-jong the sister of Kim Jong-un in this very hotel last night.”

“I heard about that,” Belvedere chewed on his ghostly pen with his ghostly white salamander mouth, “Speaking of which, do you know anything about an attack that occurred in this hotel last night in which a satyr was bitten by a blue-eyed white wolf?”.

“No, I hadn’t heard about that,” Apollo sipped his ambrosia-Red Bull hybrid drink, “I didn’t know there were any satyrs left in the world since the death of Pan 2000 years ago.”

“I wonder if Dr. Cadbury Rocher has revived any,” Belvedere spilled ghostly blue ink all over his ghostly white suit.

At that moment, Apollo’s sister Artemis Diana entered the hotel room wearing a metallic short skirt and looking like Gal Gadot’s twin sister.

“Apollo dear,” Artemis spoke, “it’s Ares. He’s trying full blast to start a war between the Israelis and the Syrians.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday February 11th
2018.

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