The Cosmic Origins of P.H. Lovecat

February 4, 2019 at 11:56 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, Music, Mystery, Mythology, News, Politics, Spy Tales, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

His name was Peter Hieronymous Felinedamour.

P. H. Felinedamour for short.

He was an artist.

An artist inspired by the writings of H.P. Lovecraft.

Many Lovecraftian entities showed up in his paintings.

And in the art show that Dashwood Forrest (the Oscar Wilde admiring owner of the Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London) would be opening tonight in his gallery, the last painting that Peter Hieronymous Felinedamour ever painted – from December 21st 2012 (the same night that he disappeared) – would be on pre-eminent display in the middle of the gallery for this art show.

Dashwood Forrest was currently showing the painting to British MP Renfield R. Renfield and his date for this evening Lepardia Marango the cultural attache at the South African Embassy in London.

Renfield was bringing Lepardia to the gallery as a way of saying thanks to the cultural attache for saving the Transhumanist MP’s life this past weekend.

Lepardia had stopped an assasination attempt on Renfield by wrestling to the ground the Russian vampiress and FSB operative Svetlana Kireeva.

The incident occurred in the final match of a darts tournament being held at the Clytemnestra’s Revenge and Agamemnon’s Bathtub Pub and Beef House.

The wrestling match between mortal woman and immortal (unless staked through the heart) vampiress caused Renfield to lose the tournament by wrecking his final throw.

Svetlana had intended to assasinate Renfield by firing a poison dart at him with an Amazon tribesman’s blow gun.

Instead the dart hit the left foot of the American Jesuit priest Father Neville Barack Chamberlain (who was theological advisor to New York Cardinal Timothy Dolan advising His Eminence on how to take a firm stand on the most pressing doctrinal and moral issues of the day) causing a paralysis in the priest’s right testicle in an example of acupuncture and chi energy gone horribly wrong.

Lepardia and Renfield gazed at the P.H. Felinedamour painting entitled

Artemis, Cthulhu, Diana’s Sacred Deer and Hecate’s Familiar Black Cat With Clytemnestra Holding A Net and Agamemnon Screaming In The Nude In The Background.

“So that was the last painting he ever painted?” Renfield asked the London art gallery owner as he downed a reddish pink with shades of China blue shooter called Vincent Van Gogh’s Missing Ear.

Ariana Grande walked by in a slit skirted evening dress that prominently displayed her new “Barbecue Grill Finger” (in Japanese lettering) tattoo.

The singer was eating Honey Dipped Chicken Fingers from McDonalds.

No doubt Bill Clinton and the Rev. Jesse Jackson would have loved to have been flies on the wall (or even better, flies on the floor) as the lovely Miss Grande walked by.

“That is correct,” Forrest bowed to Renfield as Renfield crushed and killed a pair of flies on the floor with his right shoe.

Forrest’s personal secretary arrived on the scene to inform the Oscar Wilde lookalike London art gallery owner that his living dead Irish manservant and valet Mulligan the Irish zombie had just accidentally spilled barbecued chicken wings hors d’oeuvres down the evening dress of British Prime Minister Theresa May.

“Excuse me,” Forrest whispered to Renfield and Lepardia as his face turned as pale as the portrait of Dorian Gray and he rushed in the direction of the catastrophe.

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday February 4th
2019.


Ariana Grande: Showing off her “Barbecue Grill Finger” (in Japanese lettering) tattoo at the P.H. Lovecat (Felinedamour) Art Show.

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Lepardia Marango Plans To Save Renfield’s Life While Andrew Cuomo Sacrifices A Groundhog For Groundhog Day

February 2, 2019 at 11:52 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Gothic, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, Mystery, Mythology, News, Politics, Romance, Spy Tales, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


Lepardia Marango the cultural attache at the South African Embassy in London in a Film Noir genre style photo shoot with the ghost of classic filmmaker Orson Welles

Lepardia Marango was officially the cultural attache at the South African Embassy in London.

Unofficially she was a spy for the foreign branch of South Africa's intelligence service.

Today she was being a model for the ghost of Orson Welles who was doing a Film Noir genre style photo shoot using colour film photography.

Most of the great Film Noir movies of the 1940s and 1950s were shot in black and white although a few were shot in colour.

The 1982 film Blade Runner which could be seen as a Film Noir movie, classic 1940s style detective tale and futuristic sci-fi thriller combined in one was shot in colour.

As was the 1997 film L.A. Confidential (which was sort of a combination Film Noir genre style movie and classic early 1950s style crime police drama) shot in colour.

Now Welles' ghost was trying his spectral hand at shooting a Film Noir himself in colour.

Welles had recently been in Chicago caught in the polar vortex snow storm from Hell that had been caused by the Norse goddess called Hel.

But he got tired of being a spectator at tantric sex encounters where Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing was busy making out with various vampiresses, goddesses and women mystics.

So Welles returned to his current earthly home in London, England (Welles had been granted dispensational leave from Purgatory by Hades and Persephone the rulers of the Underworld in order to be able to serve as a spirit advisor to British MP Renfield R. Renfield along with the ghost of Sir Winston Churchill).

When the photo shoot was over, Lepardia Marango returned to her apartment.

While there, she received a text message from the South African cultural attache in Moscow (who was also a spy for the foreign branch of South Africa's intelligence service).

Apparently the Russian vampiress Svetlana Kireeva was in London where she was planning to assasinate British MP Renfield R. Renfield at a darts tournament at the Clytemnestra's Revenge and Agamemnon's Bathtub Pub and Beef House in London.

The plot had been arranged by Russia's Vladimir Putin, Turkey's Recep Tayyip Erdogan and Pakistan's Imran Khan (whom Renfield had threatened to blow his testicles off with a .44 Magnum unless Asia Bibi was allowed to leave Pakistan) and Svetlana had been selected to carry it out.

Lepardia entered the pub where she shouted "Stop!" causing Renfield to miss his shot and lose the tournament but saving his life.

. . .

New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo was in upstate New York where he would be sacrificing a live groundhog to show the world what a kind and compassionate person he was.

Joining him in the furry little weather prognosticator's sacrifice was Virginia Gov. Ralph Northam who mercifully was wearing a paper bag over his head so no one would recognize him now that his racist Ku Klux Klan college photo from 1984 had gone viral.

The groundhog was sacrificed in front of a statue of Hecate the Greek goddess of witchcraft.

Hecate: To whose statue the poor little groundhog was sacrificed

After the sacrifice, New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo received a text message from Pope Francis where the pontiff bestowed on the leading Democratic Party politician a special apostolic blessing.

Not far from the Bishop of Rome stood Allatallahbel the Vampiress Priestess of Baal who, along with the Vampiric Knights-Templar and the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow, had taken over the Vatican back on October 13th 2017.

Allatallahbel the vampiress priestess of Baal who had recently dyed her hair red in honour of the recent Super Blood Wolf Moon.

"Well," Allatallahbel laughed, "It doesn't look like Vitae (which was the name of the little groundhog in Sleepy Hollow in upstate New York- editor's note) will be around to enjoy either a late spring or an early spring."

. . .


The Austro-Croatian mystic Maria Orsic calls out to Dracul Van Helsing in her hotel room in the Mysterious Goddess Hotel in Chicago,
"Once more for new time's sake please, Mr. Van Helsing."

. . .

Meanwhile in Nairobi Kenya, the Kenyan vampire huntress Megan Shimbiro had been informed that the Nazi vampire Franz Kohler undead and very very very late of the Ahnenerbe Nazi SS Occult Bureau was up to some sort of nefarious activity in Kenya.


The Kenyan vampire huntress Megan Shimbiro on the lookout for the Nazi vampire Franz Kohler of the Ahnenerbe Nazi SS Occult Bureau.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday February 2nd
2019.

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The Versatile Blogger Award

March 3, 2018 at 10:25 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Personal essays, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

The Versatile Blogger Award

Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing had been performing every single act from the Kama Sutra with South African cultural attaché Lepardia Marango in a bedroom in a medieval inn in a small village in Wales in the middle of a fierce snow storm.

He had stopped when Lepardia paused to answer a text message from South African President Cyril Ramaphosa.

As Dracul checked his own social media after performing every single position from the Kama Sutra, he noticed he had been nominated for the Versatile Blogger Award.

Here was Dracul’s blog post in response to the nomination:

The rules to the award are simple:

Just nominate some other blogger and ask them to answer a question asked by you and then tell 7 interesting things about yourself.

I would like to thank Shreya Sukrity

https://readnewweb.wordpress.com/

for nominating my name for the Versatile Blogger Award.

Shreya asked me a question- Every cloud has a silver lining?

My answer: But there’s a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow 🌈.

My nominees for Versatile Blogger Award: Anyone who wants to answer the question I pose (which I will pose at the end of this blog post).

7 things about myself:

1): I use as the HTML backdrop frame for my blog an HTML backdrop frame that is 10 years out of date on WordPress.

The reason I do is because I happen to like the background- a nice Victorian Gothic style setting- perfect for a vampire novel.

Of course the only problem with it is that I’m unable to like other people’s comments on my own blog posts.

I notice many people like my comments on my own blog post but there is no like button for me to click that I like comments on my own blog posts.

So if you’ve ever wondered why I’ve never clicked Like on your comments on my blog posts, dear readers, it’s because I’m unable to do so.

2): For some reason ever since he was elected President, I have a dream at least once a week where Donald Trump phones me up for advice.

He obviously never listens to it which explains why all of his policies are such disasters.

3): My three favourite literary characters are Sherlock Holmes, Philip Marlowe and Father Jonathan Darrow the mystic Anglican priest who was the central character in Susan Howatch’s series of six novels about the Church of England in the 20th Century.

4): My favourite animated cartoon character is Jessica Rabbit.

5): My 5 favourite writers are William Shakespeare, Jane Austen, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and C.S. Lewis.

6): My favourite vampire novelist is Anne Rice.

7): My favourite person from History is Jesus Christ.

and here are 3 extra points about myself

8): My favourite contemporary TV character is Raymond Red Reddington (who’s a lot like my own vampire novel character Renfield R. Renfield- and they both have the same initials as well- R.R.R.)

9): My favourite male singer is Josh Groban and my favourite female singer is Aya Matsuura (a Japanese singer)

10): My favourite famous last words spoken on a deathbed by a famous personage in history would be the last words spoken by Oscar Wilde on his deathbed,

“Either that wallpaper goes or I do.”

My question for all those versatile bloggers out there who want to answer this question – Of all the gin joints in all the world, who would you least like to see walk into Rick’s Cafe in Casablanca if you happened to be there?

-An award acceptance
blog post written by
Christopher
Saturday March 3rd
2018.

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Lepardia Marango and Dracul Van Helsing On Saint David’s Day In Wales

March 1, 2018 at 10:37 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Romance, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Lepardia Marango and Dracul Van Helsing On Saint David’s Day In Wales 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

Lepardia Marango the cultural attaché at the South African Embassy in London was visiting the Principality of Wales.

She decided to visit Saint David’s Day celebrations in Wales 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 and report back to her government in Pretoria what she had discovered about the manner in which the Welsh celebrate the feast day of their national Patron Saint.

As she crossed the border from England’s Herefordshire County into Wales, it was then that the worst of the Siberian snow ❄️ storm freezing cold air system that the British were calling the Beast From The East decided to hit Wales with full force.

It was a good thing that the car had an excellent heating system as she was wearing a short skirt.

With the blowing snow, she decided that she probably would not definitely be able to make it as far as Cardiff the Welsh capital.

Driving down the highway, she came across the small village of Llanvihangel Crucorney (pronounced Clanvihangel Crew-corny) and decided to stay at the Skirrid Inn there since she could not drive further in the snow.

Fortunately they did have one room left.

She went to the dining room for supper where Welsh rarebit was the Saint David’s Night special.

Seated a few seats away from her was the Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing who had also been visiting Wales to attend Saint David’s Day celebrations and had also got caught up in the Saint David’s Day snow storm.

Dracul caught a glimpse of Lepardia’s short skirt and her lovely black silk pantyhose clad legs.

He went over and spoke to her, “Aren’t you Lepardia Marango the cultural attaché at the South African Embassy in London?”.

“Yes, I am,” she smiled, “You’re Dracul Van Helsing aren’t you? We met at Renfield R. Renfield’s Parliamentary Christmas 🎄 Cocktail Party back in December.”

They had dinner together.

When both went to their respective rooms for the night, the cold stone of the inn could not keep out the cold from outside.

Both had got up at the same time to go downstairs for warm coffee or tea.

“Gee, maybe we should keep one another warm,” Dracul suggested.

“That might not be a bad idea,” Lepardia smiled.

They went back to Lepardia’s room and spent the rest of the night making love.

On the radio which was playing softly in the background, BBC News was playing Vladimir Putin’s Russian 🇷🇺 State of the Union Address in which the Russian leader boasted that he was now in possession of a nuclear weapon that was invincible.

So for that matter did Dracul Van Helsing.

Lepardia Marango squealed with delight.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday March 1st
2018.

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Renfield Elected MP By A Landslide

June 9, 2017 at 4:41 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Politics, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Renfield R. Renfield representing the British Transhumanist Techno-Progressive Anti-Bio Conservative Party has won his constituency of Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds by a landslide defeating his closest opponent sitting incumbent British Conservative MP Agamemnon Thor Christie (often called Agathor Christie for short) by over 17,000 votes.

Most commentators and political analysts agree that it was Renfield’s Tuesday June 6th 2017 attack on an ISIS training camp in Libya earlier this week in which Renfield had illegally sent members of the British Brigade of Gurkhas in and tied explosives to the ISIS members’ tiny testicles that were then blown up after Renfield had appeared to them in holographic form and recited one of the numerous witty poems he’s famed for writing (See https://draculvanhelsing.wordpress.com/2017/06/06/renfields-attack-on-isis-camp-in-libya/ )

It was this raid that caught the imagination of the British public (and the condemnation by the country’s politically correct elites) in the wake of the Manchester and London terrorist attacks which led to Renfield’s landslide victory in his Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds Constituency says Manchester University political science professor Churchill Thatcher.

Nonsense, say the membership of the Tewkesbury Sex Addicts and Nymphomaniacs Association, it was Renfield’s call for “greater sexual intercourse among Britons” that led to his overwhelming victory.

On the evening of Wednesday June 7th earlier this week, British Prime Minister Theresa May was wanting Renfield R. Renfield charged with high treason for his unauthorized use of the British Brigade of Gurkhas in his own personal not officially sanctioned raid on an ISIS training camp (Mrs. May now presides over a hung parliament and a minority government).

The high treason charge was immediately vetoed by Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II after Renfield had jumped in and saved one of her beloved Pembroke Welsh corgis from drowning in a swimming pool…”

“It’s a good thing,” Renfield grinned while reading the Manchester Guardian article on his landslide election victory, “that no one and especially the Queen noticed that I was the one who pushed the corgi in the swimming pool in the first place so I could earn the Queen’s unending gratitude by diving in and rescuing it.”

Renfield went back to reading the article…

Renfield will be having a fellow Transhumanist joining him in Parliament.

Welsh songstress Morgana Fay Lee (who some people claim is an ancient vampiress and the alleged niece of the sorceress Morgan Le Fay of Arthurian fame) defeated sitting incumbent Labour MP Magog Rhys Petley (who some people claim is a werewolf) by over 300 votes in the constituency of Newbridge in Wales.

Renfield R. Renfield and the Welsh Vampiress Morgana will be taking their seats as Transhumanist MPs in the Westminster Parliament sometime in the next few weeks…

“Wow,” the South African cultural attache Lepardia Marango thought to herself as she read the Manchester Guardian article, “I dated both Labour MP Magog Rhys Petley and Conservative MP Agathor Christie in the past and now both have been defeated by British Transhumanist candidates.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday June 9th
2017.

Lepardia Marango
Lepardia Marango: Did her dating of two British MPs cause the election of two Transhumanists to the UK Parliament?

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Saint George’s Day 2017

April 23, 2017 at 3:45 pm (Detective story, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Literature, Mythology, News, Politics, Romance, Vampire novel) (, , , )

Saint George and The Dragon

South African cultural attache Lepardia Marango and British Conservative MP Agathor Christie had gone to morning services at Saint George’s Anglican Church in Hanover Square in the city of Westminster, central London to celebrate Saint George’s Day since Saint George is the patron Saint of England.

Afterwards they went to have brunch together in a nearby pub.

Sitting across from them was Renfield R. Renfield in disguise.

Renfield was wearing dark sunglasses, a Scottish kilt with sporran, a t-shirt that said I AM WILLIAM WALLACE and was carrying bagpipes at his side.

“So, Agathor,” Lepardia adjusted her dark navy blue skirt, “you’re the great nephew of British mystery novelist Agatha Christie?”.

“Yes, but only by marriage,” Agathor Christie confessed, “not by blood unfortunately. I’m the great nephew of her cad first husband Archibald Christie whom she divorced in 1928 after he had an extramarital affair with one Nancy Neele (whom he married after his divorcing Agatha).”

“What about your name Agathor?” Lepardia asked, “Were you named after your great aunt by marriage Agatha Christie and given the masculine name Agathor?”.

“Um… actually no I wasn’t,” Agathor sipped his orange juice.

“Were you named after the character in Tolkien then?” Lepardia poured herself some tea.

“No, not him either,” Agathor blushed.

“Then who were you named after?” Lepardia looked at him quizzically.

“Well,” Agathor felt himself turning as red as the fried tomatoes on his plate, “My full Christian name… if you can call it a Christian name… is Agamemnon Thor… I’m Agamemnon Thor Christie. I was named Agamemnon because my father was a Greek mythology buff. And I was given the middle name Thor because my mother is a Norse mythology buff. In school because the kids made fun of the name Agamemnon, I shortened my name to Agathor for short (a shortened form of Agamemnon Thor) because Tolkien is always cool for every generation of kids.”

“I see,” Lepardia smiled and laughed, “And do you have any conditions for marriage?”.

“Well,” Agathor’s face was now turning as red as a Communist who had fallen into a giant bottle of ketchup, “I don’t intend to marry any woman called Clytemnestra.”

“Well, my name isn”t Clytemnestra,” Lepardia Marango who had a good classical education laughed heartedly.

Renfield R. Renfield (who did not have much of a classical education) did not.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday April 23rd
2017.

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Lepardia Marango: The She-Wolf of London

April 21, 2017 at 5:01 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , )

Lepardia Marango

Lepardia Marango the South African cultural attache at the South African Embassy in London worked part-time as a fashion model in London.

The reason being that she didn’t earn very much money working as a cultural attache for the South African government.

The photographer played music in the background as he shot her picture.

The music was from the radio set to a contemporary popular hits music station in London.

The announcer intoned, “And now for something completely different… a never before heard recording sent to me by a friend and fellow DJ in Kiev… Josef Stalin and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing the Soviet National Anthem… apparently this was Radio Moscow’s greatest hit for December 26th, 1943…”

The photographer who did have a permit for carrying a gun in London used it on the radio.

“I’m sorry for doing that,” the photographer apologized, “but one bit of singing was so bad… no doubt the voice of the late unlamented dictator Josef Stalin, I didn’t really feel like walking over to the radio to turn it off. My ear drums couldn’t have handled the extra seconds to walk over there.”

“That’s all right,” Lepardia smiled, “if you hadn’t done anything, I’d have shapeshifted into a leopard and gone over there and clawed the radio and the voice to smithereens.”

The photographer laughed at Lepardia Marango’s remark totally unaware that she was being serious.

When the shoot was over, Lepardia decided not to change out of the dress she was wearing as she found it quite hip and fashionable for London Spring 2017.

She stepped out on to the sidewalk where she bumped into a man very formally dressed who was wearing a very dark suit, dark tie, white shirt and dark pants.

“Oh, I’m sorry, excuse me,” Lepardia apologized.

“It’s quite all right,” the man bowed, “it’s my fault. I really should be spanked on the bare bottom for not looking where I’m going.”

“Well, I wouldn’t go as far as that…” Lepardia laughed.

“I would,” the man smiled.

“You look familiar,” Lepardia laughed, “are you on television?”.

“I’m Agathor Christie the British Conservative MP for Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds,” the man bowed again.

“A Member of Parliament?” Lepardia frowned, “I once dated a Member of Parliament a few years ago. Worst relationship I had in my life. And he always drank my cartons of buttermilk in my refrigerator and left them empty.”

“What party did he belong to?” Agathor Christie asked.

“Labour,” Lepardia replied.

“Oh, that explains it,” Christie laughed, “For passion, you must date a member of Sir Winston Churchill’s party not Clement Atlee’s. Churchill knew what he was talking about when he said Clement Atlee had a lot to be modest about. After all, they did go to the same public sauna and steam baths in London. And besides, you have my assurance, I wouldn’t drink your buttermilk. I loathe buttermilk.”

“Well, that’s nice to hear,” Lepardia laughed again.

“Say, may I buy you a drink?” Agathor asked. “Possibly one a little stronger than buttermilk.”

“All right,” Lepardia accepted the arm he offered her.

As they walked down the street, they were observed by one Renfield R. Renfield.

“I must find out if Agathor Christie is married,” Renfield R. Renfield, who was going to run as the British Transhumanist Techno-Progressive Anti-Bio Conservative Party candidate against Agathor Christie in his Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds riding in the upcoming British general election, said aloud, “and if he is, I’ll publish these photos.”

Renfield took several photos of the couple with his smart phone.

“How do you know that’s not his wife?” Amadeus asked as he ate a tiger-striped orange licorice ice cream cone.

“Oh shoot, I hadn’t thought of that,” Renfield looked taken aback.

“Welcome to the year 2017,” Amadeus Emanon said roughly at the same moment that U.S. Attorney-General Jeff Sessions was discovering that Hawaii was now a U.S. state.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday April 21st
2017.

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A Night In The Life of Lepardia Marango

March 7, 2017 at 8:06 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, Horror, Mystery, Mystery/horror, Mythology, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Lepardia Marango ran down the street in her purple mini dress and purple spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes.

Lepardia who was the cultural attache at the South African Embassy in London had been spending her Tuesday night clubbing with some friends.

She thought it was safe to do so since the next full moon was 5 days away.

For Lepardia had the misfortune of being a were-leopard (a person who turns into a leopard during the full moon) having been bitten by a were-leopard 7 years ago in South Africa.

There were other circumstances when Lepardia would turn into a were-leopard besides during a full moon.

One was being in the presence of a powerful witch.

As far as she knew, there were no powerful witches at the club she was at.

Little did Lepardia know that Hecate the Greek goddess of witchcraft was in London visiting Apollo the Greek sun god who had spent the past couple of months in London.

And both of the Greek immortals had been at the Dionysus or Bust (of Aphrodite) Club tonight where Lepardia had been celebrating a friend’s birthday.

Subsequently Lepardia felt herself turning into a were-leopard.

She immediately left her startled friends and went running out the back door of the club.

Desperately she searched the streets of London for a place that sold buttermilk.

For she had discovered there was some sort of antidote to her condition in buttermilk that prevented her transformation.

She ran into a small grocery.

A taxi driver had moments before just bought the last carton of buttermilk.

He was delivering it to the British House of Commons at Westminster where there was a lot of howling going on quite literally on the Opposition Labour Party backbenches.

The howling was coming from Welsh werewolf British Labour MP Magog Rhys Petley who had visited the Dionysus or Bust (of Aphrodite) Club earlier tonight.

Lepardia felt herself turning into a were-leopard.

“Oh, God, no,” Lepardia said to herself.

Then from around the corner, she smelled the sweet smell of buttermilk.

She ran around the corner and pounced.

She eagerly drank from the carton and then ran back around the corner… transforming from leopard to Lepardia again.

“That leopard stole my buttermilk,” Amadeus Emanon pointed out the empty carton to his friend and co-employee Renfield R. Renfield.

“It could have been worse,” Renfield ate a tuna fish sandwich, “she could have stolen my tuna fish sandwiches.”

Lepardia meantime had hailed a cab and was on her way back to the club.

Lepardia Marango The Were-Leopardess

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday March 7th
2017.

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Lepardia Marango Observes British General Election

April 9, 2015 at 7:10 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

Lepardia Marango Observes British General Election

Lepardia Marango the cultural attaché at the South African Embassy in London was sitting in a London tea shop enjoying a cup of Earl Grey tea.

She adjusted her skirt and brushed crumpet crumbs off her blouse as she typed on the keyboard of her laptop.

She had received an email from an ex-University classmate of hers in South Africa who said he had just come down with a hernia after he unilaterally tried to push a statue of British colonialist Cecil Rhodes off its pedestal on the University of Cape Town campus.

A crane was brought in to remove the statue to prevent the emergence of future hernias according to a South African news report.

Lepardia glanced at the TV screen in the tea shop.

A BBC News report was showing a nasty fight that had broken out at a candidates’ debate in the constituency of Newbridge in Wales.

The fight was between a micro-mini skirted pop singer Morgana who was running as an Independent candidate on the British Transhumanist Techno-Progressive Anti-Bio Conservative Party platform and Magog Rhys Petley who was the sitting MP and incumbent candidate for the British Labour Party.

The fight was later taken outside but all the cameras showed outside was some fight going on between a large vampire bat and a large wolf.

The TV screen then showed a campaign stop for British Prime Minister David Cameron.

At the appearance, a protestor held up a picket sign in front of Mr. Cameron that said:

Why Settle For A Prime Minister Who’s Only Human When You Can Have One Who’s Transhuman?

Lepardia took a careful look at the protestor holding the placard in front of Cameron.

Wasn’t that Renfield R. Renfield? she asked herself.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 9th
2015.

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Lepardia Marango Gets Email From Magog

February 16, 2015 at 9:17 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Lepardia Marango Gets Email From Magog

Lepardia Marango the cultural attaché at the South African Embassy in London had just received an email from her sometimes dating companion the far left British Labour MP Magog Rhys Petley.

The backbench Opposition MP from Wales was serving as an international observer for the new ceasefire that had just come into effect in eastern Ukraine.

In the email, Magog Rhys Petley had written that he was coming under fire from both sides- Ukrainian and Russian.

He said both Ukrainian government troops and pro-Russian rebel forces were firing silver bullets at him.

Why, she wondered, were both sides firing SILVER bullets at him?

One would think that he was a werewolf or something, Lepardia thought as she sipped her buttermilk.

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday February 16th
2015.

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