The New Wicked Witch of The West

January 13, 2021 at 11:21 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , )

Cackling hysterically and looking every inch the green faced looking Margaret Hamilton Wicked Witch of the West from the Wizard of Oz film (a slight allergic reaction to the DeathVaxx vaccine that WHO health officials assured her would go away), Nancy Pelosi flew in on her broomstick to Congress to oversee House impeachment hearings against President Donald Trump.

“Nancy, I had no idea you flew a broom to work,” New York Sen. Chuck Schumer remarked as he exited his limousine with six very kosher looking Playboy bunnies and an appearance that suggested not much social distancing had gone on in that limo.

“Of course I do, you ninny,” Pelosi padlocked her broomstick to an ABSOLUTELY NO PARKING sign, “I’m a witch.”

“I didn’t know that,” Schumer commented as he pulled up his zipper, “Life is full of surprises but thanks to the Dominion voting machines, elections will no longer be.”

The six kosher looking Playboy bunnies headed off in search of a kosher deli where they could buy themselves jars of large pickles as all six women were tired of looking at the infinitesimally small and tiny pickle they had been forced to endure throughout the entire morning commute.

“Six kosher Playboy bunnies 3 times a week,” Schumer smiled, “That adds up to 666 you know.”

Schumer’s reasoning might amount to some arcane form of kabbalistic gematria because in terms of pure ordinary mathematics, the numbers just didn’t add up.

But maybe with a little help from Dominion voting machines, they did.

Pelosi went to her office, then her closet (where she had safely locked away her idol statue of Hecate the Greek goddess of witchcraft to protect it during last week’s staged Capitol Hill siege something alas she had forgotten to do with her laptop), took out the Hecate idol and placed it in an alcove in her office.

She then turned the lights out and lit candles in front of the Hecate idol (who was depicted in her crone hag form as that was the one that most perfectly resembled Pelosi’s own self) and paid obeisance to it.

After reading the latest piece of Marxist sodomite drivel to come from the lips of Jorge Mario Bergoglio (known to the world as Pope Francis), she then made the Upside Down Sign of The Cross and headed off to the House chambers to begin the proceedings on impeaching Donald Trump for a 2nd time.

. . .

As nighttime settled over Washington DC, the vampire Lev Tomi (whom the fallen angel Mephistopheles possessed Joe Biden had named to his staff of Chiefs of Armed Services) supervised the U.S. National Guard who were preparing for the Biden inauguration this coming January 20th.

During his mortal life, the vampire Lev Tomi had been the Russian Bolshevik Leon Trotsky.

. . .

Meanwhile in Rome Italy, the Italian national government under Communist Giuseppe Conte was in danger of collapse.

Peter Whitstable the man they call the Fox Mulder of Interpol was in Rome because he had received reports that the actual Greek god Poseidon was cavorting and splashing around in the famous Fountain of Trevi claiming that he had found more than 3 coins.

As Whitstable walked the streets of Rome, he was surprised to see a giant elk wandering the streets of Rome.

A giant elk that cast a giant shadow in the light and even more mysteriously a giant shadow in the dark.

“In the land of Mordor where the shadows lie,” went through Whitstable’s mind.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday January 13th
2020.

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Nancy Pelosi: A Soviet State For 4 Horses

January 9, 2021 at 11:32 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel, war) (, , , , )

Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was asleep in his aquarium at Set Enterprises Laboratories in London, England.

He suddenly had a dream (or was it a vision?) of British MP Renfield R. Renfield fighting alongside anti-Communist forces in the 2nd American Civil War.

One of the Communists’ most pre-eminent “useful idiots” U.S. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi had the misfortune of falling into the hands of Renfield’s brigade.

The punishment Renfield envisioned for Nancy Pelosi had been inspired by an old Hammer Films horror movie that starred Christopher Lee that he had seen a few months ago.

In the film Christopher Lee played an evil landowner.

Finally the peasants got sick of his despotic rule and revolted (“How revolting these deplorables are!” as an upper crust leftist snob like Hillary Clinton might put it).

They had tied Lee’s evil landlord character between 4 horses.

With an arm or leg in a rope attached to one of the 4 horses x 4 (One limb for each horse facing a different direction).

Finally the leader of the revolt whistled and each one of the 4 horses galloped in different directions (towards the 4 corners of the earth).

Lee’s evil landlord character found himself being ripped apart into 4 different pieces.

No doubt an exceedingly painful experience for a brief moment.

Nancy Pelosi had been stripped naked (Renfield had to put blindfolds on the 4 horses and on the men in his brigade so as not to be turned to stone by the awful sight).

Renfield himself wore a very dark and powerful pair of welder’s sunglasses so he could see to direct the operation but at the same time not to be turned to stone by the awful sight of a naked Nancy Pelosi who was wearing nothing but her stupid looking Covid mask.

As Nancy Pelosi now found each limb of her body in a rope tied to a horse, she suddenly realized she was in a very perilous situation.

To say nothing of her hair being a mess as she had been unable to book an appointment with her San Francisco hairstylist lately.

“Jesus of the Gnostic heretics, Pope Francis’ god of surprises!” She cried out, “How awful it is that my arms and legs are spread out like this.”

“For once,” Renfield was getting an image of all this despite the powerfulness of the welder’s dark glasses he was wearing, “You have said something that I’m in total agreement with.”

Renfield then spoke the signal to the 4 horses, “May Geronimo defeat and crush and wreak havoc and vengeance on the Skull and Bones Society.”

The 4 horses then bolted and rode off into 4 different directions.

From a Dodge Ram truck parked nearby, its radio could be heard playing that old Patsy Cline song, “I fall to pieces…”

Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster woke up from his dream (or was it a vision?) in a sweat (adding further to the saltiness of the salt water he was in).

He went over to his waterproof iPhone, opened up his iPhone Notes and typed a note to himself to never ever get on Renfield’s wrong side.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday January 9th
2020.

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Vampiress Lilith Furious At Abraham Accords Israel-UAE-Bahrain Peace Treaties

September 16, 2020 at 9:50 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Yesterday as senility prone Joe Biden was attempting to share his kosher lox and cream cheese bagel with his marijuana pot smoking cactus plant Sweet Dementia, his arch foe Donald Trump was hosting a Middle East peace treaty signing ceremony at the White House.

Israel was signing landmark peace deals with both the United Arab Emirates (UAE) and Bahrain.

The UAE and Bahrain are just the third and fourth Arab countries to recognize Israel since its founding in 1948.

Egypt signed a peace treaty with Israel in 1978 and Jordan signed a peace treaty with Israel in 1994.

Mauritania established diplomatic relations with Israel in 1999 but severed ties in 2010.

Trump’s son-in-law Jared Kushner helped in negotiating the treaties.

The accords were called the Abraham Accords since Abraham was a common historical figure of shared importance in the three monotheistic religions that originated in the Middle East- Judaism, Christianity and Islam.

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith (who was also the world’s first vampiress) was absolutely livid over the ceremony.

Lilith felt that her good name and reputation were libelled and maligned in the Babylonian Talmud and she had vowed to destroy the Jewish people ever since.

At a meeting on the banks of the Euphrates River today, Lilith discussed her plans with her friends the demon Asmodeus and the little green frog Nimrod.

Her strategy was to try and form an alliance between Turkey (whose leader Recep Tayyip Erdogan fancied himself the new Sultan of a revived Ottoman Empire) and Iran (who had been an enemy of Israel since the Ayatollah Khomeini first came to power in the Islamic Revolution of 1979) and get them to attack Israel.


The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith wants no one to rain on her parade when it comes to her revenge against Israel.

. . .

The group Catholic Satanists For Biden had been successfully established with two Catholic Satanist members of the U.S. Senate and a Catholic Satanist former head of Catholic Relief Services in key positions in the organization.

Cardinal Joseph “Nighty Night, Baby” Tobin the Archbishop of Newark New Jersey had recently shown that his political sympathies were similar to that of Catholic Satanists For Biden.

Cardinal Tobin had earned the moniker “Nighty Night, Baby” for a private message he had inadvertently turned into a public tweet when he messaged the Italian male soap opera star who often spent long periods of time at his beach house, “Nighty night, baby. I love you.”

A diocesan spokesman later said that the Archbishop actually intended to privately message his sister with the message.

If true, the Cardinal’s message had overtones of the relationships between brothers and sisters in ancient Egyptian Pharaohonic royalty.

Such is the state of modern American Catholic ecclesial support of the modern U.S. Democratic Party.

Meanwhile Nancy Pelosi was sitting at home watching the skies lit up by California wildfires as she burnt a little sage in front of a statue of the Inca earth mother goddess Pachamama.

She left the room momentarily as a crow flew in through the window, picked up the burning piece of sage in its beak and flew out the window heading off in the direction of the nearest forest.

Pelosi returned and without noticing the burning piece of sage was missing, she debated whether she should privately message on Twitter her nephew by marriage California Gov. Gavin Newsom with the words, “Nighty night, baby.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday September 16th
2020.

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