The Howling of The Frost Giants: A Poem

December 23, 2016 at 4:14 pm (Folklore, Horror, Mythology, Poetry, The Supernatural) (, , , , , , , , )

The Howling of The Frost Giants: A Poem

Outside the house the frost giants howl
preparing for the Norse Ragnarok
December 2016- a descent into darkness
A land of winter but no Christmas
as C.S. Lewis foresaw
A Narnia ruled by a Queen of Snow and Ice

Outside the house the frost giants howl
to the materialist just great gusts of wind and snow
to the magician wicked spirits of ice and snow
risen from the depths of Niflheim
Loki calls to Thor in adversarial jest
Fenrir howls at Odin
Great serpents rise in this land of the damned
A Hell minus centigrade and minus Fahrenheit
where snow and ice devour instead of flames

Trolls and ogres have left their underground caves
and openly walk the streets of the city
great blemishes of ugliness and decay
Oh for the laser machete of Pan Goatee to slaughter such ugly beasts

Outside the house the frost giants howl
Christmas without Christ is here
but instead of a Transhumanist technological utopia
Old beasts and old gods have returned
Old devils laugh in glee
mocking lights on a Christmas tree.

Man and Superman- thy godhood has arrived
but lesser than the trees and the stars
More powerful ancient spirits are also here
This is the season Prophets and Mystics did fear
It has come to pass
in the form of Wintery blast
The Frost Giants are here!
They laugh and they jeer!
An Ice Age Reign of Terror!
Talk of a Promised Land- all in error!
As gods fall from a celestial hall, wolf and serpent scowl,
Outside the house the frost giants howl.

-A poem written by Christopher
Monday December 19th 2016.

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Sleipnir: A Poem

December 14, 2015 at 8:08 pm (Folklore, Mythology, Poetry) (, , , , , , )

Sleipnir: A Poem

From Sleipnir
to reindeer
what a path was trod
from flying steed of Odin the Norse god
to aerodynamic reindeer carrying a red suited bod
oh what metamorphoses have taken place
Joseph Campbell noted till he was blue in the face
but now we’ll return to the beginning of the tale
just shortly after Jonah was snack for a whale
There was a Norse warrior Marlon Brando godfather like in appearance
whose body was so wide he needed plenty of room for clearance
he talked like he had marbles in his mouth
no one understood him from north to south
He made people offers they couldn’t refuse
And if they did, they wound up with body parts they could no longer use.

Now there was a Norseman who pissed off this godfatheresque Chief
And doing so would cause him a lot of grief
Godfather told Loki to put a horse’s head in his bed
Severed from his body, the horse would be dead.

Now Svadilfari was the name of this stallion
if he were a car, he’d get many miles to the gallon
Now Loki was a pervert of perverts beyond measure
his deeds would be something Caligula would treasure

When Loki saw Svaldifari was a handsome stud
his knees turned to jelly and his toes to mud
Loki turned himself into a mare
with long mane flowing hair
and they got it on in the buff- all naked and bare

So no horse’s head
wound up in warrior bed
Instead Loki gave birth to an 8-legged horse
Commented Mr. Ed, “Of course. Of course.”

And so Sleipnir was born
with 8 legs but no horn.

And so Odin rides this 8-legged steed across the skies
still seen by those on psychedelic highs.

-A poem written by Christopher
Monday December 14th 2015
where Norse mythology meets
The Godfather Part One.

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Peter Whitstable On The Temple Mount

March 23, 2014 at 7:21 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Peter Whitstable On The Temple Mount

Peter Whitstable the man they called the Fox Mulder of Interpol stood on the Temple Mount.

He was looking for signs of a panther that had been seen on the Temple Mount.

Peter Whitstable believed the panther was Konalu a creature that was created by being astral projected from the mind of Fenrir the Battle of Ragnarok apocalyptic wolf from Norse mythology.

He decided it would be a good thing to get out of the office at Interpol’s International Headquarters in Lyon, France because it looked like it would only be a matter of time before his co-workers called the men in the white suits bearing straight jackets and emerging from their paddy wagons.

While in Israel, he had asked to see the man at Mossad they called the Controller of the Golem.

His request for an appointment was turned down.

As he stood on the Temple Mount, he recognized the demon Asmodeus standing on the same mount yawning and smoking a large extra-King sized cigarette.

Peter Whitstable sometimes wished that he had taken up drinking or sniffing glue.

Then he’d have an excuse for seeing what he sometimes saw.

This was one of those moments.

. . .

Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan was in his bedroom.

He looked up and noticed a black panther approaching him.

Unsure of what to do, Erdogan held out his hand and started purring, “Nice kitty. Nice kitty.”

He hoped that the panther wasn’t Syrian and wasn’t a pro-Bashar Assad sympathizer seeing as how Turkey had just shot down a Syrian military plane.

He hoped that the panther wasn’t an avid Twitter user either- one who was pissed at not being able to access his Twitter account in Turkey.

. . .

Russian President Vladimir Putin told the Commander of Russian Forces who were amassing on the border with Ukraine to wait for his instructions on whether or not to go ahead and invade all Ukraine.

He would leave the speaker phone on in his office and if he were to start shouting “Yes! Yes! Yes!” that would be his order to cross the border and take all of Ukraine and unite it to the Russian Motherland.

As he stood at the window and gazed out at the Moscow landscape with its domed churches and crosses, he wondered if he could spot the Golden Arches of the nearest McDonald’s as he suddenly felt a craving for a Big Mac (which mercifully had escaped the list of U.S. and EU sanctions against Moscow).

Suddenly the beautiful and lovely seductress the Babylonian Vampiress Lilith flew in through his office window.

She was wearing the latest spring fashion Cartier white evening dress with gold sequins.

She threw Putin back on to the Russian black bear skin rug in his office, ripped off all his clothes and mounted him.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” Putin was soon screaming in a matter of minutes.

The General put his phone down.

He addressed his aide- a handsome young lieutenant with whom he re-enacted ancient Spartan army nighttime maneuvers.

“Well there we have the order,” the General said, “we take all of Ukraine.”

“That’s good,” his lieutenant answered, “I’ve kind of got a hankering for Kiev style homemade perogies at the moment.”

“But first you must have a Russian sausage,” the General pulled down his pants.

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday March 23rd
2014.

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Lilith In Kiev

January 28, 2014 at 8:44 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Lilith In Kiev

Former U. S. President Jimmy Carter looked out the residence of his Georgia home as a rare and fierce snow storm raged outside.

In addition to the snow he was surprised to see the ancient Norse god Thor stumbling through the raging snow drifts clutching his hammer Mjolnir.

Following Thor and growling at him was the Norse wolf Fenrir.

Fenrir had around his neck a small barrel flask (like those worn by Saint Bernard dogs in the Swiss Alps) that had on it the words RAGNAROK OR BUST.

. . .

Ukrainian Prime Minister Mykola Azarov had just announced his resignation and that of the entire governing cabinet.

When the protesting crowds in the streets of the Ukrainian capital of Kiev heard the news, they erupted into loud cheers.

Standing in the midst of the protestors looking conspicuous in a long flowing white evening gown was the ancient but extremely young looking Babylonian vampiress Lilith (who was History’s first vampiress).

Lilith was checking her Nokia Lumia smart phone and had read on her BBC News app that Russian President Vladimir Putin had come down with severe heartburn following a dinner of Belgian waffles he had after an EU-Russia Summit held in Brussels.

Just then she got a text message from the Demon Asmodeus who was standing atop the Temple Mount in Jerusalem.

Asmodeus asked her to call him right away as he said something of great cosmic significance was about to happen.

Lilith also got a text message from one of Paris’ most exclusive fashion shoe stores saying the custom made order she had given for a pair of exclusive high fashion footwear had now come in and would she please call them right away.

Lilith pushed a button and sped dialed the number of the Paris shoe store.

A few seconds later she pushed another button and put an incoming call from the demon Asmodeus on hold.

. . .

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday January 28th
2014.

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Haiku For My Friend Sherrie And Her Oak Tree

October 24, 2013 at 6:57 pm (Poetry) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

The great mighty Thor

stands at friend Sherrie’s oak tree

asking Where’s Odin?

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Fenrir The Wolf And The Hell There Is

December 7, 2011 at 9:34 pm (Vampire novel) (, , )

Fenrir saw another pathetically ugly woman- this one with a misshapen pug nose like a pug dog would have.

When she left the convenience store, Fenrir summoned the panther entity Konalu from his psyche.

The panther Konalu sprang on to the ugly looking redhead and tore her apart.

Fenrir continued on his way.

He decided to revert to his human form.

The wolf shapeshifted into a man.

As he walked down the sidewalk, another man came from another direction.

The two brushed against one another.

The man shapeshifted back into his natural form Fenrir the Wolf.

He sprang on to the man and tore him apart.

He then continued down the sidewalk- but remained in the shape of a wolf.

He passed a furniture and appliance store where in the window the TV was on and one of Satan’s biggest useful idiots the retired U.S. Episcopalian Bishop John Shelby Spong was telling the interviewer that there was no such place as Hell.

The wolf hound from the place that didn’t exist (according to Bishop Spong) continued on down the street.

To be continued.

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Fenrir The Wolf and Konalu The Panther

December 3, 2011 at 11:55 pm (Vampire novel) (, , , , )

Twirling and twirling the snow blew.

Like a huge vortex of moving blinding white, it moved like a tornado in a prairie dust bowl save this was the snow white ground of Merrie England.

The snow stopped outside the old ancient village of stone houses.

The vortex of twirling snow stopped and stepping out of it like a figure emerging from a phone booth was the wolf Fenrir.

Fenrir- the monstrously hellish wolf of Norse mythology, the son of the evil demonic trickster god Loki, the father of the wolves Skoll and Hati, the biter off of the right hand of the Norse god Tyr and the prophesied slayer of the Norse god Odin during the cosmic end times battle of Ragnarok.

Such are the once and future accomplishments of the wolf Fenrir.

Fenrir entered the village and outside the stone post office of the village was confronted by the sight of a fat pathetically ugly woman.

And most shockingly of all the fat pathetic ugly woman had a baby in a stroller with her.

If the shapeshifting hamster Renfield R. Renfield had been around, he’d have most likely quipped, “Who the Hell would want to fuck that?”.

Amadeus Emanon if he had been there might have said, “Maybe she has a great personality.”

To which Renfield would have shrewdly replied, “Yes but one can’t fuck a personality- at least not in a bodily sexual sense.”

Fenrir called upon the panther Konalu- an astrally produced panther created by a far advanced psychic beam projected externally from the wolf’s powerful psyche.

The panther Konalu ripped the fat pathetic ugly looking woman to pieces.

That way Fenrir didn’t have to touch the piece of garbage.

Fenrir then directed the panther to rip the baby apart which it did.

Fenrir then continued down the snow swept street.

He was confronted by the sight of five drunken university students stumbling out of the village pub where they had stopped to imbibe on their way back to their university town from an overnight excursion they had taken to London.

The five were stumbling their way back to a small Volkswagen.

The BBC’s public service broadcasts in which American actress Lindsay Lohan urged the British people not to drink and drive had obviously been lost on the five sobriety challenged idiots.

But like an ancient and yet so modern champion of People Against Impaired Driving, the wolf Fenrir jumped upon the five drunken youths and tore them apart limb from limb ripping them apart with his huge lupine jowls.

He then ate the remaining pieces of the five youths- flesh, bones, eyeballs and all.

Fenrir then emitted what sounded like a cross between a loud belch and a huge growl.

Fenrir’s blood alcohol level in his his huge lupine body had gone up considerably since gorging on the five drunken imbeciles.

He stumbled along the road outside the village.

A school bus that was driving a bunch of girls and their mothers from a nearby girls’ choral competition and concert came along the road.

The school bus driver was still feeling bad over having run over and killed a small dog on the road that morning.

As soon as he saw the wolf Fenrir and mistaking the wolf for a large dog, the bus driver hit the brakes causing the bus to swerve and go off the road into an ice bound creek breaking the ice.

The screams of the young girls and their mothers disturbed the wolf Fenrir’s highly sensitive hearing.

Fenrir despite his drunken stupor was still able to call upon and emit the panther Konalu from his psyche.

The panther Konalu dove into the icy water and ripped the screaming girls and their mothers to shreds.

The sound of flesh being ripped apart was music to Fenrir’s ears.

To be continued.

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Thor At The Movie Premiere of Thor

May 5, 2011 at 10:23 pm (Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Amadeus Emanon ate his popcorn as he stood in line outside a movie theatre in London waiting for the midnight Premiere of the movie Thor to open.

“You brought your own popcorn?” his girlfriend the New Orleans vampiress and operatic songstress Angelique Dumont said as she smoothed her navy blue skirt.

“Yes, to prevent my getting hungry while I stand in line,” Amadeus answered.

Just then a pizza delivery boy on a bicycle came up to him.

“You the Amadeus Emanon that called us on your BlackBerry?” the boy asked.

“That’s right,” Amadeus nodded.

“You ordered the ham, pineapple and curried chicken pizza?” the boy produced a box.

“Yes,” Amadeus paid and tipped the boy.

He opened the box and offered a slice to Angelique.

“You think of everything,” Angelique laughed as she threw back her hair, “so where is Renfield this evening?”.

“He’s still lying unconscious in a bed of the neurosciences unit of King’s College Hospital,” Amadeus replied.

“You mean after he knocked himself out when he discovered that you and your boss Set’s manservant Athelstan had both been invited to the Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton and he hadn’t,” Angelique smirked.

“That’s right,” Amadeus bit into a slice of the steaming hot ham, pineapple and curried chicken pizza.

“Say, get a load of that guy there dressed like Thor,” Angelique pointed.

Amadeus looked in the direction that Angelique pointed.

The Thor like figure flashed a smile showing vampiric incisors.

Amadeus stopped eating and gasped, “Say, you really are the ancient Norse vampire Thor aren’t you?”.

“Yes,” Thor moved in threateningly with his hammer Mjollnir, “I am the son of Odin. I’ve come to see how Hollywood depicts me.”

“Very sympathetically I would imagine,” Amadeus reached for his Crucifix in his jacket pocket.

“Yes, probably,” Thor laughed and walked to the front of the line.

“Very sinister person in real life,” Angelique noted.

“Not at all like the Marvel Comics character,” Amadeus put the Crucifix back in his pocket and swallowed a pineapple off his pizza slice.

To be continued.

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