Osiris Meets Yemaya In Rome

September 12, 2017 at 3:42 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , )

The Egyptian vampire Osiris was walking the streets of Rome where he lived.

His wife and sister Isis still lived in Paris.

A family reunion between the pair from a few years back didn’t go so well as planned so the two were now living separately.

As for his evil brother and brother-in-law Set, he was a multi-billionaire and living in London.

And one of Set’s former employees Renfield R. Renfield was now being touted as the next Prime Minister of Great Britain- which really didn’t bode well for the state of the world.

Osiris had received a call from Pope Francis this morning (while Osiris was asleep in his sarcophagus) asking if he’d call a press conference and condemn Donald Trump for not believing in climate change.

The Egyptian deity said he’d get back to Francis on that.

But now it was evening. The sun was down and Osiris was free to walk the streets.

As Osiris walked down the street, a peacock strutted by.

“Wow, peacocks really are proud,” Osiris said to himself.

Then a vulture flew by.

“Wow, that’s not a very promising sign,” Osiris thought, “rather ominous in fact.”

He stopped in front of a fountain filled with algae and all sorts of flowers and plants around the fountain.

The fountain sprayed Osiris and Osiris felt the taste of salt water rather than fresh water which was unusual for a fountain in Rome.

Then a face arose from the waters.
Yemaya

“Who are you?” Osiris asked.

“I am Yemaya the goddess of the seas and oceans,” replied the figure.

Osiris had recalled reading somewhere that an orisha (divine spirit) was the goddess of the ocean and seas in the Afro-Caribbean Yoruba religion as well as Haitian vodou, Louisiana voodoo and Santeria.

“What do you want with me?” Osiris asked.

“You should know, Osiris, husband of Isis the Egyptian goddess and divine queen of the seas, that krakens are rising everywhere,” Yemaya stated, “arising in both fresh and salt water.”

From Yemaya’s tone of voice, Osiris gathered that krakens arising was obviously a major problem to be concerned about.

Meanwhile on Mount Olympus, Zeus was muttering in his sleep, “Release the Kraken. Release the Kraken.”

Athena said to Hermes, “He is speaking in the singular and not the plural, isn’t he?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday September 12th
2017.

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Renfield In Egypt and Then Germany

April 29, 2017 at 2:33 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

After the papal speech at al-Azhar University in Cairo, Pope Francis and the Egyptian vampire Osiris met behind closed doors with Islamic leaders from across the Muslim world.

A phone call from the conference room was put in to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and the Chief Rabbis of Israel.

Renfield R. Renfield who had bugged the room made notes.

“That’s very interesting,” Renfield thought to himself.

He left the notes on the table in his Cairo hotel room and put in a call to his boss the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set letting him know the developments.

“What,” Set seethed, “that bastard Osiris! Why does everyone want to make deals with him and not me?”.

“The world has bad taste, boss,” Renfield replied as he flicked through the Cairo hotel TV guide and noticed the reality TV shows Survivor and also Big Brother Canada were available on the hotel’s TV programming.

“What the world needs is a statue of Set in the proposed ecumenical Interfaith Temple in Jerusalem,” Set started pulling his hair out with his razor sharp fingernails in a dramatic barber like scene that hadn’t been seen since the days Johnny Depp played Edward Scissorhands.

Meanwhile over in North Korea, Kim Jong-un was busy sobbing on to his teddy bear (that had the face of Anthony Hopkins as Dr. Hannibal Lecter on it), “That woman in my dream told me that if I painted an image of a scorpion attacking the testicles of a white bull on my ballistic missiles, they’d launch successfully.”

The beautiful Korean woman in the white gown (from his dream) appeared behind him in reality and kicked him in the ass and told him, “I also told you to write the Latin words IN HOC SIGNO VINCES above the image, you idiot.”

Renfield decided to stop off in Germany on his way home from Cairo.

He had received a message from his new found ally the Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing.

There was important business that Renfield had to attend to in Bavaria.

In a quiet Bavarian village, Herr Dummkopf Drecksack was a driving test administrator.

He was the motherfucking asshole of all driving test administrators.

He had just given a hard time to a personal friend of Dracul Van Helsing and Renfield R. Renfield.

Flunking her for making one mistake.

Renfield followed the pink velvet pants wearing Herr Dummkopf Drecksack as he walked down the street.

He followed him to a post office where the man picked up a dozen packages of viagra and a dozen packages of cialis.

He then put them in his brown coloured VW bug and drove home.

Inside his house, he lit a candle in front of the giant photo of Adolf Hitler above his black altar.

“Like Adolf, do you?” Renfield said behind him.

“What the?-” Herr Dummkopf Drecksack turned around.

That evening, Berlin’s national TV news channel reported, “The driving test administrator was found hanging from his rusty brown VW bug in the middle of the town square with his pants and underpants pulled down and a dozen packages of viagra hanging from his right arm and a dozen packages of cialis hanging from his left arm…”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday April 29th
2017.

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Egyptian Family Feud- 2017 Style

April 25, 2017 at 4:36 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Renfield R. Renfield the chief of Security and Intelligence Gathering for Set Enterprises was attending a staff meeting on the Set Estate (the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire’s colossal West London mansion) with the Vampire Set himself, Set’s personal concert pianist Amadeus Emanon and Athelstan the personal butler and valet to the aforementioned vampire.

Renfield called the meeting to order.

“So,” Renfield belched after pounding the gavel, “Amadeus, I understand you were in charge of analyzing Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster’s revelations while I was away plotting the overthrow of the Nicolas Maduro government in Venezuela.”

“That’s correct,” Amadeus Emanon bit into a grilled cheese sandwich.

“Did Michelangelo reveal anything earth shattering?” Renfield asked as he drank from a bottle of Raven Conspiracy Deep Dark Red Wine.

“Well,” Amadeus munched on a Greek salad made with Goddess Athena Brand Feta Cheese, “apparently Pope Francis likes milk and cookies while the late former British Prime Minister Winston Churchill liked brandy.” (https://draculvanhelsing.wordpress.com/2017/04/19/michelangelo-foresees-pope-francis-at-regensburg/ )

“So, tell me something I don’t know,” Renfield pushed away a copy of an organic chemistry textbook in front of him.

“Mr. Renfield, sir,” Athelstan coughed, “I believe Mr. Emanon also listened in to the wiretaps you have on Master Set’s brother Osiris’ phone in Rome.”

“Really?” Renfield noticed that 5 dominatrixes were now following him on his Twitter account, “And did you discover anything earth shattering there, Amadeus?”.

The billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set stopped licking his toe nails with his long serpent like forked tongue and listened to what Amadeus had to say.

“Well apparently Pope Francis has invited Osiris to accompany him when he visits Egypt this coming April 28th to 29th,” Amadeus ate a chocolate covered pyramid made out of peanuts.

“What?” Set spit an extra large toe nail out of his mouth in anger, “My brother Osiris was invited to Egypt to attend the inter-faith peace conference at Cairo’s Al-Azhar University with Pope Francis and I wasn’t.”

“That is correct,” Amadeus unwrapped a green coloured chocolate statue of Osiris and started eating it.

“Renfield,” Set seethed, “I want you to go to Egypt and spy on Osiris and Pope Francis and see what they’re up to.”

“But, boss,” Renfield applied moisturizing cream to his moustache, “this week I start campaigning in the constituency of Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds as the British Transhumanist Techno-Progressive Anti-Bioconservative Party Candidate.”

“Well, if you fail to go to Egypt to spy on Pope Francis and Osiris on my behalf,” Set started eating from the pot of crocodile stew in front of him, “you can kiss your 500 million British pounds sterling a year salary good-bye since you’ll be out of a job with me plus you can move out of my mansion as you’re no longer an employee here.”

Within seconds, Renfield was on the phone booking a flight from London to Cairo.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
The Feast Day of Saint Mark
(1st Bishop of Alexandria in Egypt)
April 25th 2017.

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Osiris, Isis and Pope Francis

March 25, 2017 at 3:36 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

“Guess who I had dinner with last night?” The Rome-based Egyptian vampire Osiris asked his wife the Paris-based Egyptian vampiress Isis.

“With Pope Francis?” Isis dipped a silver spoon into her dish of Black Sea caviar as she sat in her apartment with a panoramic view of the Eiffel Tower.

“Oh shoot, I was hoping that would have been a surprise,” Osiris wiped the Eggs Florentine off his face as he sat in his apartment with a panoramic view of the Colosseum.

“I read about it in Renfield R. Renfield’s online newsletter,” Isis checked her iPad.

“That bastard who’s Chief of Security and Intelligence Gathering for our London-based evil brother Set?” Osiris spit out his freshly squeezed orange juice, “I think he must have wiretapped my phone.”

“He did,” Isis sipped her champagne, “he mentioned it in his newsletter a few weeks ago.”

“I should get an email subscription to that,” Osiris ate his toast.

“You should,” Isis put caviar on her bagel, “so how was the dinner with Pope Francis and the EU heads of state and government?”.

“It was wonderful,” Osiris’ smile was as bright as that of the Sun god Ra, “that Francis is a very ecumenical guy. He invited me to place a statue of myself in Saint Peter’s Basilica. Since last night was the eve of the 60th Anniversary of the signing of the Treaty of Rome which laid the groundwork for today’s European Union, he also called on a new vision for Europe to combat the evil populism that has overtaken Europe in the wake of Brexit and Donald Trump’s U.S. victory.”

“And I hope that new vision for Europe that Pope Francis sees is an ancient Egyptian vision as conceived by us centuries ago,” Isis walked over to the window and noticed a Kraken crawling up the Eiffel Tower.

“The very same,” Osiris looked out the window and noticed an ET gray emerging out of a spaceship atop Rome’s Colosseum.

At that moment, Isis got a text message on her phone sent to her by her disembodied son Horus.

“I have become incarnate again,” Horus gave his mother Isis the cheerful news, “I will be born in 9 months time.”

“Holy cow,” Renfield who had been eavesdropping on Isis and Osiris’ conversation knocked over his glass of milk.

Amadeus Emanon who immediately started crying over the spilled milk wept, “Actually I think Horus would be a holy falcon. Hathor was the holy cow in ancient Egyptian religion.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday March 25th
2017.

Vampiress Isis
Paris-based Egyptian Vampiress Isis: Hoping that the new vision for Europe will be an ancient Egyptian vision conceived millenia ago by Isis and Osiris.

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Vampire Set’s Night On The Town- Berlin 1927

February 13, 2017 at 12:11 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

The billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set was in the Mephisto Lounge in Berlin. He wasn’t sure how many cabarets he had been visiting this evening. For he had been drinking a lot. And it had been alcohol. And not blood.

An alcohol hazed memory of the murder of his brother Osiris came back to him.

Set's Murder of His Brother Osiris Appeared Different In An Alcoholic Haze

That’s funny, Set thought to himself. He didn’t recall Bastet being there when he invited Osiris to inhabit the box which he was to close and later bodily dismember Osiris into 14 pieces. He wondered as he chewed an olive he found in his jacket sleeve pocket (from a martini in a previous nightspot) if that was the origin of the expression, “Has the cat got your tongue?”. Perhaps the Egyptian cat goddess Bastet had Osiris’.

No sooner had Set thought this profound thought when he was confronted by the sight of the devil Mephistopheles standing before him.

In the Mephisto Lounge, the waiters were dressed like Mephistopheles And when ordering from the menu, you’d have to agree to sell your soul before they took your order.

You signed the document in blood but if you were squeamish about that, they would accept red ink.

Set agreed to sell his soul in order to get a beer.

In another corner of the lounge, two men were watching and observing Set.

Both men were with British Intelligence.

“Did you find out about his background?” One man Thomas asked the other man Henry.

“Well,” Henry took out his notebook, “he’s apparently Egyptian. There’s no record of him prior to his suddenly showing up in a Cairo nightclub in November of 1918. The past several years he’s lived in London, New York and Chicago. He moved to Berlin in 1925.”

“And what are his political sympathies?” Thomas asked.

“Well, he’s attended several meetings of the German National Socialist Workers’ Party to hear that fellow Corporal Hitler speak,” Henry answered.

“I see,” Thomas looked thoughtful, “and he apparently still owns property in England?”.

“Affirmative,” Henry nodded.

“This fixation he has with Nazism,” Thomas inquired, “Do you suppose he’s racist?”.

“I have no idea,” Henry shrugged.

Thomas pondered the question for a moment.

Then he lit his pipe, blew smoke rings and looked up at the ceiling.

“I suppose there’s one way to find out,” Thomas breathed in the Egyptian tobacco.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday February 8th
2017.

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Egyptian Vampiric God of Darkness Set On An Evening In Berlin 1927

February 10, 2017 at 1:17 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

It was the year 1927 and the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set was living in Berlin.

It had been almost 9 years years since Set had had his tomb in Egypt dug up by British archaeologist Dr. Edgar Lovecraft Ashbury back on November 11th 1918 (the same day that the Armistice had been signed ending the Great War- the war that later generations would call the First World War).

Set was living in a luxurious Berlin apartment with his girlfriend the famous 1920s Berlin dominatrix the Baroness Erika Von Sade.

Set felt quite at home in the decadence and debauchery of 1920s Berlin.

It would have been what Egypt would have been like if he had been allowed to rule the land instead of his brother Osiris. He had of course bodily dismembered his goodly goody two shoes (made of Nile River reeds) brother Osiris. But unfortunately his sister and sister-in-law (for she was Osiris’ wife) Isis had found all the body parts of Osiris (save one) and put Osiris back together again.

Osiris tried to be a good Pharaoh again but it just wasn’t the same since he fell to pieces (or rather was carved to pieces by his brother Set).

Isis never did recover Osiris’ severed phallus. And his wooden phallus (by which he and Isis managed to conceive their son Horus) didn’t quite feel like the real thing (to quote a Coca-Cola ad from the distant future).

So Osiris wrote a sad song whose lyrics in ancient Egyptian said, “I’m not half the man I used to be” (the lyrics were later translated into English by the Beatles in the 1960s). Osiris later fell into a deep sleep under a black magic spell cast by Set who exiled his brother to a planet near the star Sirius for a few thousand years.

Horus, to avenge his father Osiris, buried Set alive in a tomb for a few thousand years.

Then that tomb had been dug up by Dr. Edgar Lovecraft Ashbury in 1918.

Set had escaped, gone into the U.S. bootlegging business with Al Capone, made a killing (his partner Big Al had made even more killings) and was using the proceeds to live the high life in Berlin.

Set was getting dressed to go out for a night on the town in Berlin on this particular evening in 1927.

“Which cabaret will you be visiting tonight, sir?” His valet Hans Franz Benz asked him.

“I’m not sure, Hans,” Set selected the red tie to go with the colour of his victims’ neck bites and the resulting liquid flow.

“I believe your favourite lounge singer Marlene Dietrich is singing at one of the clubs tonight, sir,” Hans tied the tie for Set.

“Really? I’ll have to go to that club,” Set decided not to go with the wooden shoes from Holland on the off chance some vampire hunter might use one of his shoes for a wooden stake.

“Did you spend the day sleeping in your sarcophagus, sir,?” Hans inquired.

“No, I did spend it indoors out of the sun,” Set replied, “I was in an auditorium listening to that dynamic young politician from Bavaria speak.”

“Would that be Adolf Hitler, sir?” Hans selected a pair of black boots with Death’s Head shoe laces.

“That’s the man,” Set smiled showing a huge pair of vampiric incisors, “he says he’s going to make Germany great again.”

“That’s good to hear, sir,” Hans put Set’s arms through his vest.

“I always admire political leaders who are going to make their country great again,” Set selected the gold cufflinks inscribed with the Napoleonic N in a Roman laurel leaf crown.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday February 8th
2017.

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Osiris and The Lost Nag Hammadi Scroll

November 25, 2016 at 6:24 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Osiris and The Lost Nag Hammadi Scroll

The ancient Egyptian vampire Osiris was in his Rome apartment enjoying a spaghetti omelette along with a bowl of Kellog’s Rice Crispies.

He had had an eventful four years since his return to Earth from the star system of Sirius back in 2012.

His returning space ship had disintegrated (with him aboard) when a Russian nuclear sub had fired a laser death ray at it.

Fortunately for him, the famous Swiss scientist Dr. Fahrenheit Celsius had been present in a nearby row boat with a working replica model of the CERN Large Hadron Collider that was able to gather up all the disintegrated atomic and sub-atomic particles.

At Halloween 2014, he Osiris had been resurrected again after his particles were put back together again by Dr. Cadbury Rocher (Normally Dr. Rocher worked for Osiris’ evil brother and brother-in-law Set but the two had had a falling out that month over financial funding for Dr. Rocher’s beloved Pegasus Project).

When Osiris had been re-assembled that Halloween but with a certain part of his anatomy missing (the same part of his anatomy that had gone missing millennia ago when Isis had put him back together after Set had dismembered him), that led to marital problems with his wife and sister Isis.

So Isis continued to live in Paris and he Osiris moved to Rome.

Since that time, Osiris had become interested in the matter of a lost Nag Hammadi scroll.

It had apparently become separated from the other scrolls in the 12 leather bound papyrus codices that were found near the Upper Egyptian town of Nag Hammadi in 1945.

The scroll was believed to be the Gnostic Gospel of The Wedding said to recount the marriage ceremony between Jesus Christ and Mary Magdalene that certain Gnostic groups believed had taken place.

Osiris had gotten in touch with a Russian Jesuit priest Father Augustus Adonais who worked in the Vatican Archives.

Father Adonais believed that the Gospel of The Wedding had wound up in the Vatican Archives shortly after Carl Jung’s death in 1961 (The Carl Gustav Jung Institute in Zurich had purchased the Gnostic Gospels of the Nag Hammadi Scrolls in 1951).

The phone rang.

Osiris wiped the spaghetti and scrambled eggs off his chin and walked over to pick up the receiver.

It was Father Augustus Adonai phoning to tell him that he had found the Gospel of The Wedding.

He had found it underneath an envelope marked Pope Pius X’s Vision of What The Future Antichrist and Future False Prophet Will Look Like.

“Anyways, your Most Exalted Ancient Egyptian Majesty,” Father Augustus Adonais spoke, “I found a passage in the Gospel of The Wedding that might interest you.”

Father Adonais read him the passage.

Apparently Simon Peter objected most vigourously to the upcoming marriage between Jesus and Mary Magdalene.

Said Peter in the Gospel, “Be it far from thee, O Lord. Verily, verily, I say unto you that if you go through with this, one of your descendants will be wearing red spider monkey fur on his head for a hairpiece.”

Osiris looked at the TV screen where Donald Trump was giving an interview and hair was falling off of his head during the interview.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday November 25th
2016.

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Solomon and The Temple of Baal At Palmyra

April 18, 2016 at 8:05 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, Horror, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Solomon and The Temple of Baal At Palmyra

“And Solomon built Tadmor in the wilderness, and all the store cities, which he built in Hamath.”

-II Chronicles 8:4

“When he (Solomon) had therefore built this city, and encompassed it with very strong walls, he gave it the name Tadmor; and that is the name it is still called by at this day among the Syrians; but the Greeks name it Palmyra.”

-Josephus, Antiquities of The Jews Book VIII, 6:1

“Palmyra was in ancient times an important city of central Syria, located in an oasis 215 kilometers northeast of Damascus and 120 kilometers southwest of the Euphrates. It has long been a vital caravan city for travelers crossing the Syrian desert and was known as the Bride of the Desert. The Greek name for the city Palmyra is a translation of its original Aramaic name Tadmor which means “palm tree”. Tadmor is today the name of a small city next to the ancient ruins of Palmyra and is heavily dependent on tourism. The ancient site of Palmyra is itself an UNESCO World Heritage Site.”

-Tourist Brochure About Palmyra, Syria prior to the outbreak of the Syrian Civil War in 2011.

King Solomon stood and surveyed the city that he was building- the city of Tadmor (the city that would later be called by the Greeks Palmyra).

Night was approaching.

A full moon was rising.

A beautiful dark-haired dark skinned and dark eyed woman approached him.

She was wearing a beautiful purple evening dress- slit at the sides and low-cut at the front.

A necklace of diamonds cut in the shape and form of human skulls hung around her neck.

“Thou art Solomon the wisest of the wise?” She asked as she stood before him.

“I am,” Solomon answered.

“I am Allatallahbel the Priestess of Baal,” she curtsied in front of him making sure he caught a glimpse of her ample and succulent breasts.

“What can I do for you, Allatallahbel?” Solomon shifted uncomfortably in his robes.

“I wish you to build in this city a temple to Baal that’s as splendid as your Temple to your god Yahweh in your city of Jerusalem,” she answered.

“Well,” he answered, “why should I do that?”.

“This night, I shall give you six hundred and sixty-six good reasons why you should do that,” she approached and rubbed her thigh against his.

“Six hundred and sixty-six eh?” Solomon breathed deeply, “that’s a lot of reasons.”

The next morning after Allatallahbel had given Solomon her 666 reasons, she stroked his head in her arms, “Art thou convinced?”.

“I am,” Solomon had to agree.

“Any other woman give you so many reasons to do something?” Allatallahbel laughed.

“One,” Solomon answered.

“Really?” Allatallahbel became jealous, “who?”.

“Her name was Isis,” Solomon recalled, “she was the wife of the architect Hiram Abiff who helped build my Temple.”

(For more on Isis and who Hiram Abiff really was, please read:

https://draculvanhelsing.wordpress.com/2011/03/06/isis-and-solomon/

https://draculvanhelsing.wordpress.com/2015/01/31/osiris-in-rome/

)

“I see,” Allatallahbel stared angrily at the morning sunrise.

“Art thou angry?” Solomon kissed her on the lips, “let me show you my master mason’s tool again. That should make you happy.”

“You say her name is Isis?” Allatallahbel ate some lobster which she gave to Solomon and he likewise did eat even though it was forbidden him as an Israelite to do so.

“Yes,” Solomon nodded.

After she had eaten the lobster meat, Allatallahbel stood and showed her magnificent nude form and then spake and prophesied, “This magnificent Temple to Baal that you shall build in this city, o Solomon, one day replicas to it shall be built in cities all over the world and then Baal shall come.”

“Really?” Solomon rubbed what he felt was an itchy invisible third eye in his forehead.

“Yes, and it will all be due to…” Allatallahbel laughed.

“Due to who?” Solomon asked.

“Due to ISIS,” Allatallahbel laughed like the demons of Hell, “Thou evil woman, who darest to trespass on what should have been mine, thy name shall be as mud and darkened and vilified.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday April 18th
2016.

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Osiris’ Vision For One World Government

November 12, 2015 at 8:50 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Osiris’ Vision For One World Government

Having got his mojo back recently (after paying his arch-enemy brother’s top research scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher a huge amount of money to re-attach a certain long lost body part), Osiris was sitting in a Rome night club hoping to get it on with the ladies.

A drunken diplomat who sat next to him up at the bar said to him, “Excuse me, sir, I was just having a conversation with my friend here,” he gestured to the empty seat next to him, “about what form a one- world government should take if one should ever happen to come into place. What form do you think it will take?.”

Osiris had been brushing up on world history ever since he had been brought back into material existence by the accelerated high particle beams of an ET laser death ray gun fired in reverse a year ago this past Halloween.

Thus he was able to answer the question.

“Well,” Osiris dropped an ancient cyclops’ eyeball into his martini, “I don’t think either an extreme laissez-faire capitalism nor a Soviet style Communism shall succeed in establishing a one-world government.”

“No, what will succeed then?” The diplomat bought another round of drinks for himself and his invisible bunny rabbit friend sitting next to him.

“I believe it will be a globalized form of German National Socialism,” Osiris answered, “but one that will be truly global and not Germanic. It will be the political and economic system of the Third Reich on a world-wide scale but one devoid of its racial theories and notions of racial superiority. In this globalized form of an international National Socialism, all races and ethnic groups will be accepted. It will be certain individuals that will be persecuted but for their beliefs and not for their racial or ethnic backgrounds- individuals who do not follow the global hive mindset (what Teilhard de Chardin would probably consider an Incarnation of his Noosphere). Those individuals will be persecuted and maybe eliminated.
The rest will follow the world leader without question under the slogan One Planet One People One Leader.
And of course instead of doing everything for the Fatherland, they will do everything for Mother Earth.”

“Wow,” the diplomat pondered this for a moment and then turned to his invisible friend (who had not touched his Harvey Wallbanger), “what do you think about that, Harvey, old boy?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday November 12th
2015.

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Cardinal JM and Osiris

November 5, 2015 at 8:23 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Religion, The Supernatural, Theology, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Cardinal JM and Osiris

The Vatican Cardinal JM was in a downtown Rome lounge waiting to meet the ancient Egyptian vampire Osiris.

His personal secretary Father Oliver Thomas Wardenclyffe would not be accompanying him as he usually did to such meetings.

Father Wardenclyffe would be attending a performance of a new ballet Swan Lake In The Desert at the U. S. Embassy this night.

The original avante-garde ballet was being performed by the U.S. Marine Corps Barack Obama Performing Arts Division.

“Your Eminence,” The Vampire Osiris dressed in a tuxedo and tie greeted Cardinal JM.

“Your Most Exalted Ancient Egyptian Highness,” Cardinal JM bowed.

“You look well, JM,” Osiris stated.

“You’re looking somewhat green this evening,” the Cardinal observed, “aren’t you feeling well?”.

“I’ve always looked green,” Osiris snapped irritably, “if you ever bothered to look at pictures of my painted image on the walls of Egyptian temples and tombs. It was a condition brought about by eating too many jars of pickles when I was younger.”

“I apologize for my abysmal ignorance, your Highness,” Cardinal JM looked flustered, “ancient Greek religion is my field of study.”

“It wasn’t Catholicism?” Osiris inquired.

“I know very little about Catholicism,” Cardinal JM replied, “which probably explains why I was named a Cardinal. If I had known even less, I would have probably been elected Pope at the Papal Conclave back in 2013.”

“Why did you arrange for us to meet tonight?” Osiris ordered a martini with extra olives from the waiter.

“I have a gift for you,” Cardinal JM put a small box on the table, “this was recently found in the Vatican Archives.”

Osiris opened the box and cried, “My original phallus.”

“Yes,” Cardinal JM nodded and smiled, “the one that your brother Set cut off so brutally in Egypt many millennia ago in a procedure which these days may or may not be covered under modern Obamacare, I’d have to check on that.”

“The one piece of my original 14 dismembered body parts that my sister, wife and lover Isis was never able to find,” Osiris wept.

“It was found back in 1922 by a Jesuit Egyptologist who died after being bitten by an asp on his ass,” the Cardinal explained, “our aging archivist only got around to cataloging it this year.”

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday November 4th
2015.

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