The Ariana Grande Concert Tickets: To Bill’s Or Not To Bill’s?

September 2, 2018 at 11:53 pm (Commentary, Culture, Fashion, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Music, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

The Ariana Grande Concert Tickets: To Bill’s Or Not To Bill’s?

Former U. S. President Bill Clinton saw the hostile look on Hillary’s face.

Oh God, what had he done now?

At that moment, Bill wished he had a wash cloth to wipe the stain off his blue trousers.

“I was going through the desk drawer when I noticed these tickets to an Ariana Grande concert,” Hillary seethed, “did you buy them?”.

“Oh, they may have been a gift from somebody,” Bill put his finger on his nose, “I didn’t know what they were.”

“Oh really?” Hillary smirked sarcastically, “I noticed you couldn’t keep your eyes off Ariana Grande’s short skirted ass when she sang (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman at Aretha Franklin’s funeral this past Friday.”

Bill was thinking to himself that Bishop Charles H. Ellis III was certainly feeling himself a natural woman that day and envied the pastor.

The former President’s thoughts returned to the screeching voice that seemed to be unnatural to this world.

He quickly put the Taco Bell burrito 🌯 he had been eating back in his pocket.

“Well, what about it?” Hillary’s voice sounded like fingernails scraping on a blackboard, “The whole world noticed how you were ogling Ariana Grande’s skirted ass at Aretha’s funeral.”

“I did not have my eyes ogling at that woman’s skirted ass,” Bill protested, “I was just enjoying her performance.”

“Oh, is that what you call it?” Hillary smirked again,” “I was watching you . I noticed you couldn’t keep your eyes off her ass the whole time.”

“You make me sound like that rising new British MP Renfield R. Renfield,” Bill protested, “Most unfair is that comparison.

Renfield would most undoubtedly agree.

“And what about the date on these Ariana Grande concert tickets?” Hillary asked, “I noticed they’re for the same night that you said you couldn’t accompany me to the Illuminati Deep State Conspirators’ Club dinner meeting. You told me something else had come up. Is this what came up?”.

Hillary waved the concert tickets at him.

“Of course not,” Bill felt his nose again.

“What was it you had to attend that night then?” Hillary asked.

“I can’t remember,” Bill answered.

“You can’t remember?” Hillary chortled like an owl in a hurricane, “and what about having your eyes on Ariana’s ass the whole time she was singing last Friday?”.

“That’s not true,” Bill protested, “at one point, I exchanged words with Rev. Jesse Jackson.”

“I imagine you two were probably exchanging lustful fantasies with one another,” Hillary seethed.

“That’s not true,” Bill felt his nose again.

Meanwhile at Rev. Jesse Jackson’s house, the good minister was trying to explain to his wife the tickets to the Ariana Grande concert she had just found in his coat pocket (coincidentally for the same night as the date on the concert tickets that Hillary had found).

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday September 2nd
2018.


What would probably have been Bill and Jesse’s favourite view if they had attended the Ariana Grande concert.
And if the night had turned out the way Jesse wanted, would Bill have spent the rest of the evening singing that old 1980s Rick Springfield song, “I wish that I had Jessie’s girl…”?

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