Renfield Confronts A Radical Depopulationist

October 3, 2017 at 7:40 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Vampire novel) (, , , )

Renfield Confronts A Radical Depopulationist

Renfield R. Renfield MP was riding the tube.

He was text messaging British Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson,

“European Union Commissioners and top bureaucrats in Brussels wouldn’t know their ass from a hole in the ground when it comes to the current situation in Spain…”

He went on,

“Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy is an asshole of epic proportions. And the current King of Spain 🇪🇸 Felipe VI isn’t far behind. He is definitely no King Juan Carlos I who united Spain 🇪🇸 in the tumult and fracas of the post Franco years…”

Renfield then finished his text message with these ominous words, “Spain 🇪🇸 I fear is on the verge of a 2nd Spanish Civil War.”

At that moment an angry looking man walked down the aisle of the train. He turned around and looked contemptuously at the other passengers on a train which wasn’t all that busy and said before sitting down, “The state needs to be depopulated.”

“Starting with you, you arrogant pompous asshole,” Renfield stood up with the gun he had just pulled out of his pocket and pumped 6 bullets into the man.

“You just killed that man,” a woman shouted.

“Aren’t you a Member of Parliament?” Another passenger asked Renfield.

“I am,” Renfield grinned, “I am also a member of Special Branch and a member of Her Majesty’s Secret Service so I have a license to kill.”

Renfield proudly held up his 0069 License To Kill card 💳 with photo ID.

As Morgan Freeman might well put it in a VISA Gold Card commercial, “Membership has its privileges.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday October 3rd

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Qonzilqointec In Madrid : A Poem

July 12, 2015 at 7:41 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Qonzilqointec In Madrid

The streets of Madrid
once capital of an empire
now a living museum
to a past once golden
and a future most bleak
From the balcony of an elegant hotel
a beautiful woman stood and viewed these streets
looking resplendent in a beautiful Spanish red dress
with black laced sleeves
She was the Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec
spiritual goddaughter of the Aztec feathered serpent deity Quetzalcoatl
come to take her vengeance on the descendants of those people who destroyed her godfather’s empire
She looked enchanting in the evening sunlight
a vampiress able to take the rays of Sol Invictus
(who generally was an Invincible Conquerer to most vampiric creatures of the night)
but thanks to a special sunblock invented for her by scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher
she was able to see the light of dawn
as well as the dusk of twilight
and not be dispatched to the waiting shores of the River Styx
awaiting the Charon driven ferry boat of Hades
A tall blonde blue eyed man suddenly stood next to her on the balcony
and gently placed his hand on hers
She looked at him
Dracul Van Helsing
Canadian vampire hunter
who had driven a stake through the heart of many a vampire
but if you were a Vampiress
or at least a beautiful Vampiress
the stake through the heart was only metaphorical
for Dracul Van Helsing had the same effect on beautiful near-immortal vampiresses
as James Bond had on beautiful mortal women
and the result was always a meeting of arms, legs and lips in one enchantingly ocean swirling ode to Eros and Aphrodite
Said she, I thought you had dropped off the face of the Earth when the world supposedly ended December 21st 2012
No, Dracul replied as he gazed at the setting sun and gazed at her glowing face, I only laid me down and rested a while and now I’ve rose again.
Qonzilqointec smiled a smile most sensuous, I recall you doing the same thing that night we crossed the Rio Grande of Aztec and Mayan prophecy and opened the boundaries of cosmic Aphrodite.
Dracul laughed
He remembered he and Qonzilqointec had engaged in a night of passionate love making that night of December 21st 2012
Had the world really changed as a result of that enchanted evening where man and Vampiress had become one?
The lips of Qonzilqointec and Dracul Van Helsing once again touched
a cosmic kiss of sun and moonlight
on a warm Madrid night.

-A narrative free verse erotic poem
written by Christopher
Sunday July 12th 2015.

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A Marxist Werewolf In Madrid

August 21, 2011 at 8:19 pm (Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Walking in Madrid in the middle of the pouring rain…

… I was walking in Madrid in the middle of the pouring rain…

… wearing the coat of a werewolf in the middle of the pouring rain…

… The Senorita in red asked me, “Are you a Christian, child?”…

and I answered, “Marxist-Leninist.”

Magog Rhys Petley was beginning to feel that he was the central character in a badly written parody of a Marc Cohn hit song.

The far leftist Labour Member of Parliament from Wales had been battling an acute outbreak of lycanthropy ever since he got bitten by the ancient Hindu demon Rahu several months ago.

Part of the curse was that he did not turn into a werewolf only during the full moon but also whenever he was deeply aroused by something.

And lately the agitation of rioters in Britain the past couple of weeks had been turning him into a werewolf.

Now Scotland Yard was under the impression that he was responsible for organizing the riots.

So Magog decided to leave the country for a while until the heat died down.

Coming to Spain may not have been the brightest idea in the world.

All of these beautiful young Spanish senoritas were getting him sexually aroused.

Not to mention the streets of Madrid were crowded because of Papal World Youth Day celebrations.

And now here in Madrid as he stood in the middle of the pouring rain, thunder and lightning flashed all around him.

Water and several hundreds of thousands of volts of electricity was probably not a good combination Magog figured.

But it still might put an end to his werewolf’s curse.

Magog drank his buttermilk.

He had discovered that drinking buttermilk seemed to serve as an antidote to his outbreaks of Rahu-bite induced lycanthropy.

The beautiful young Senorita in red had asked him if he was a Christian.

No doubt because of all the visitors here to the Papal World Youth Day.

She walked down the streets in her red dress which fit even more tightly around her lovely figure because of the wetness caused by the rain.

As the glass of buttermilk had been emptied and she continued to swish elegantly down the streets in her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes, Magog felt himself getting aroused.

As he turned hairy and started crawling around on all fours, the woman in red turned around and faced him without fear, “To remove the curse, seek the help of the Key.”

She then turned and vanished down a Madrid alleyway.

“A key?” Magog thought to himself as he started to howl.

Where was he going to find a key in this tumultuous weather?

What did she mean by the Key?

Thunder and lightning flashed all around him.

To be continued.

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