Atargatis In Moscow

October 14, 2022 at 10:58 pm (Art History, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, News, painting, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis in the Kremlin

Russian President Vladimir Putin had stopped off in a Kremlin tea shop to watch the broadcast of the Russian state controlled television news network.

Said news announcer Dmitri Bullshitovich, “In London, England today two members of the environmentalist group Just Stop Oil threw tomato soup at Vincent Van Gogh’s famous 1888 painting Sunflowers at the National Gallery in London.
The contents of two tins of Heinz tomato soup were thrown at the painting.
The ghost of Andy Warhol was overheard to say, “Thank God no cans of Campbell’s Tomato Soup were used.”
The two Just Stop Oil climate change protestors’ 15 minutes of fame came to a sudden and abrupt end when British MP Renfield R. Renfield used the headsman’s axe from the 1933 Alexander Korda directed Charles Laughton starring film The Private Life of Henry VIII to chop off one of each of the two airheaded protestors’ hands (which they had foolishly glued to the wall underneath the painting).
Athough the Metropolitan London Police Force in a press release statement rather euphemistically described the Renfield procedure as “Specialist officers have now unglued them…”
As the protestors were led away in one handcuff each, a holographic image of American singer-songwriter Don McLean appeared and started singing, “I could have told you, Vincent, this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you…”
As an organ grinder and his monkey were gunned down and killed outside the National Gallery as yet another example of London’s rising crime rate, the holographic image of Don McLean then appeared outside and began singing “The day the music died…”
Meanwhile all across England, members of Just Stop Oil were apparently visited by an invisible 6 foot 8 tall Welsh pooka bunny rabbit (seen by members who had been drinking Harvey Wallbangers) and had an American cream pie laced with tomato soup thrown in their face.
After the cream pie was thrown, the ghost of Vincent Van Gogh then appeared and started singing, “I have no ear for music…”

Russian President Vladimir Putin continued walking down the hall, “I have the feeling that that particular Russian state television news story was true.”

Indeed it was for Putin’s supernatural spirit advisor the demon Moloch (who was appearing to Putin in the guise of Saint Michael the Archangel) had fled upon hearing the news story for he couldn’t stand listening to the truth.

When Putin entered his office, he was surprised to see the Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis sitting there.

Putin recognized it was Atargatis from an unknown (to the world) Vincent Van Gogh portrait painting of Atargatis that the Kremlin owned.

The painting had been purchased from Van Gogh by a Saint Petersburg art dealer just before the artist died in 1890 and had been given by the art dealer to Czar Alexander III that same year of 1890.

“What does Atargatis the mother of Semiramis the 1st queen of Babylon want with me?” Putin asked.

“I want you to stop invading Ukraine, turn around and invade the State of Israel instead,” Atargatis answered.

Putin spit the tea he had just sipped out of his mouth.

The tea went flying across the room and hit the ghost of Orson Welles in his beard.

It was a good thing Welles was a ghost.

Otherwise he’d have tea stains in his beard.

“And what are you doing here?” Putin asked Welles’ ghost.

“I’ve come to make you an offer from Renfield R. Renfield that you can’t refuse,” Welles pulled out a spectral violin case.

Atargatis? Or Welles?

Whose offer should he Putin accept?

“You’ll be the new villain of Hannukah if you invade Israel,” Welles pointed out.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday October 14th
2022.

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Semiramis On The Night of The Hunter’s Moon

October 9, 2022 at 10:58 pm (Detective story, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic romance, History, International Intrigue, News, Personal essays, Philosophy, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Semiramis the Queen of Babylon on the Night of The Hunter’s Moon

The full moon in October is called the Hunter’s Moon.

And Semiramis the Queen of Babylon was out standing in the moonlight in the backyard gardens and gazebo grounds of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s colossal West London estate.

The Queen of Babylon was not sure why she was there on this night of all nights.

The Night of the Hunter’s Moon.

She just felt drawn to come here tonight for some reason.

The Hunter’s Moon, Semiramis thought.

Interesting as she recalled her husband Nimrod of many millenia ago was called in Genesis Chapter 10 “a mighty hunter against the Lord”.

Today Nimrod the once “mighty man” is a little green frog who is occasionally seen in the company of the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith, is also seen in the company of the cigarette smoking demon Asmodeus and also serves as an advisor to NASA on the Artemis moon rocket program (even though he knows nothing whatsoever about building moon rockets).

Semiramis suddenly heard footsteps approaching as she stood alongside the gazebo landing.

It was Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing approaching.

In his right hand he carried a suitcase containing video footage of Russian President Vladimir Putin making out with various high-priced escort call girls in the Catherine The Great Moscow Hilton Hotel in downtown Moscow Russia which is owned by Madame Natasha Rachmaninoff.

Van Helsing and Set Enterprises were hoping to use the video footage to blackmail Putin and prevent him from launching a nuclear attack on Ukraine or the West.

Van Helsing could have sent the video footage to Set Enterprises via the Internet but thought the video footage might be destroyed by Russian hackers or the American CIA’s Science and Research Division (that had been headed by the Operation Paperclip landed immigrant Nazi vampire Dr. Eichmann Mengele since 1950) which wanted global nuclear war or Google just because the technocrats who run Google are a bunch of assholes.

“Van Helsing,” Semiramis gasped.

The Queen of Babylon had encountered Van Helsing on previous occasions.

“Semiramis,” Van Helsing acknowledged the Queen of Babylon.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re the spitting image of Carson Cody Albion the private eye?” Semiramis asked.

“A few people have told me that,” Van Helsing answered, “Isn’t Carson Cody Albion the private eye supposed to be immortal? In the same way that Sherrielock Holmes the lesser known twin sister of Sherlock Holmes is likewise literally immortal? Although Sherrielock became immortal as a result of eating a Lingzhi Supernatural Mushroom omelette and drinking a Lingzhi Supernatural Mushroom milkshake. I have no how idea how Carson Cody Albion became literally immortal.”

“Rumour has it,” Semiramis answered, “that he became immortal after drinking milk from the sexy incredible well endowed breasts of my very beautiful and very young looking mother the Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis.”

“Really,” Van Helsing was intrigued, “Any idea where your mother is now?”.

“None, whatsoever,” Semiramis replied.

Van Helsing loked disappointed.

He’d have to continue searching for Ponce de Leon’s Fountain of Youth in Florida.

A sudden rumble came from the night sky.

Semiramis and Van Helsing looked up.

It was the Celtic stag god Cernunnos chasing a demon elk.

A couple of years ago a Calgary based geopolitical analyst friend of Renfield’s had written a blog post (out of the blue) about a demon elk seated on a throne in Rome’s catacombs who was being worshipped by a group of Cardinals and Western world political leaders.

Today at the Spanish language evangelical church the geopolitical analyst attended a woman described an experience she had this past Tuesday where she had encountered a demonic looking elk on a highway in Idaho.

The elk smashed her windshield and the woman had to keep her eyes closed so that the glass that covered her face wouldn’t enter her eyes and she’d go blind.

She was rushed to hospital by ambulance where all the glass that surrounded her eyes was carefully removed and thanks to prayer and the amazing team of doctors and nurses, her eyes were saved.

That same Tuesday the geopolitical analyst was having a dream about the Celtic stag god Cernunnos hunting a demon elk.

He was awakened by his bozo landlord who needed to get into his room to the electric control panel in his room so he could momentarily shut off all the power in the house.

The bozo landlord did so.

And did so without stepping on the geopolitical analyst’s tablet that was being charged on the floor.

However the landlord was making such a racket upstairs, the geopolitical analyst decided to go get a haircut as he needed one.

When he got home, he was shocked to discover his tablet and his cord and plug in complete disarray on the floor as the bozo landlord had stepped all over it.

His tablet that had a perfect appearance for years was now full of cracks.

He had been getting severe eyestrain the past few days from trying to read and write on it.

But that was obviously nothing to the terror that this woman in his church must have felt this past Tuesday over the fact that she could possibly go blind with her face and eyelids covered in glass from the broken windshield on her car after her car made contact with a demonic looking elk on a road in Idaho.

Ironically enough, the geopolitical analyst had recently written a blog post about Australia’s notorious Uncle Ernie on a road in Idaho.

And then this woman’s testimony regarding her eyes and eyesight in Church on this Sunday October 9th 2022.

Another amazing thing is this Calgary based geopolitical analyst was raised Anglican and in the Canadian Anglican Book of Common Prayer, October 9th is the Memorial Commemorative Date of Robert Grosseteste a scholar who became the Bishop of Lincoln and died in the year 1253.

Robert Grosseteste studied the science of optics and wrote extensively on the subject.

He also invented the first pair of glasses ever invented in medieval Europe.

Robert Grosseteste also taught the young Roger Bacon science.

Roger Bacon was also the medieval philosopher who invented the Baconian scientific method (It can be found in Roger Bacon’s Magnum Opus which was one of the geopolitical analyst’s favourite books in the Medieval Philosophy class he took at the University of Alberta)).

Scholars of the Enlightenment couldn’t handle the idea of a 13th Century Franciscan monk inventing the Baconian Scientific Method so they lied and claimed that it was the late 16th and early 17th Century Protestant and Rosicrucian Freemason Francis Bacon (who conveniently had the same last name) that came up with the Baconian scientific method.

So in a matter dealing with eyes, a geopolitical analyst has had severe eyestrain the past week from trying to read and write on a cracked tablet, a woman almost lost her eyesight after her car windshield came crashing in during an encounter with a demonic looking elk on an Idaho highway and the geopolitical analyst found all this out in Church on the Anglican Memorial Commemorative Day of Robert Grosseteste the Bishop of Lincoln who studied the science of Optics and invented the first pair of eye glasses in medieval Europe.

A dream about a demon elk, an actual encounter with a demonic looking elk this past Tuesday.

Anything else?

Well the Calgary based geopolitical analyst almost died from severe food poisoning as a kid from eating a piece of undercooked wild game animal meat from… an elk.

“There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”
-Hamlet, Act I, Scene v, lines 167-168.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday October 9th
2022.

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French Islamism, Justin Trudeau and The Great Reset

November 20, 2020 at 11:59 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Politics, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

The Kraken Napoleon VI who was the leader of the French Aquarian Age Bonapartist Party was reading about the “republican values” ultimatum that French President Emmanuel Macron had recently delivered to French Muslim leaders.

Ever since the beheading of French schoolteacher Samuel Paty this past October 16th (for having dared to show his students pictures of the Prophet Mohammed in a class discussion he was having on free speech), Macron had been seeking to crack down on militant Islam in France (a controversial thing to do since France has Western Europe’s largest Muslim population).

In a rare move for a liberal secularist leader, Macron wasn’t acting like a pansy when it came to standing up to radical militant Islam.

A sure contrast with the limpwristedness on the topic shown by the Communist compulsive/obsessive memorizer of John Lennon Imagine lyrics in the Vatican “Pope” Francis.

This past Wednesday November 18th, Macron had given the French Council of the Muslim Faith (CFCM) 15 days to work with the French Interior Ministry.

The CFCM had agreed to create a National Council of Imams which will issue imams with official accreditation which could be withdrawn.

Radical Islamist imams could therefore find their accreditation withdrawn by the Council.

French Interior Minister Gerald Darmanin had said, “We must save our children from the clutches of the Islamists.”

The new draft law to curtail radical Islam in France would be discussed by the cabinet on December 9th.

While liberal Muslim imams would probably go along with the bill, radical Islamist militant imams would probably not.

There was a retired Calgary police detective (who when he worked as a young constable on the Metropolitan London Police Force in Britain back in the early 1960s had arrested a young woman named Christine Keeler for soliciting. The same Christine Keeler who would go on to be implicated in the John Profumo Scandal which would lead to that Secretary of State For War’s resignation from the cabinet of Harold MacMllan’s Conservative government in the UK at that time) who had told a recently arrived geopolitical analyst from Vancouver back in 2016 that he believed a civil war in France would break out between radical Muslims and non-Muslims sometime in the early 2020s and that civil war would spread to Britain and the rest of Western Europe.

The Kraken reflected that it may well be this Macron-Darmanin ultimatum that sets the whole thing off.

Radical Muslims in the Muslim world were already becoming increasingly anti-French as a result of Macron’s words and actions.

Particularly those radical Muslims in Pakistan who became so volatilely hyper and uber-excited about everything that a sensible person could easily be led to believe that they were a bunch of nutcases and raving lunatics (which in all probability they most likely are).

. . .

Canada’s asinine Prime Minister Justin Trudeau had this week just said that discussion of The Great Reset was a “conspiracy theory”.

Even though Justin Trudeau at a virtual UN on-line conference this past September had said the pandemic had “provided opportunity for a reset”.

Even though the World Economic Forum this past month had held a meeting in which its chairman Klaus Schwab had called for a Great Reset.

Hell, Klaus Schwab had even co-wrote a book with Thierry Malleret called Covid-19 and the Great Reset.

TIME Magazine had even done a cover story earlier this month called The Great Reset.

Even the Communist Pope Francis was in the 2nd day of a 3-day conference at the Vatican discussing the Economy of Francesco in which the Great Reset was front and center.

However Justin suffered from the delusion that people would actually believe what he had to say on the subject.

As he emerged from the door of his Ottawa residence to face the press and the cameras and make yet another idiotic statement to Canadians, he was suddenly hit in the face with a cream pie.

“Shit,” Justin Trudeau sputtered through gabs and gobs of cream pie filling, “This is the 2nd or 3rd time in the past year that an invisible entity has come forward and thrown a cream pie in my face.”

“Sounds like a conspiracy theory to me,” remarked a reporter for Rebel News Canada.

. . .

The Greek god Zeus had recently ordered the release of the Kraken (his own personal Kraken not the French politician the Kraken Napoleon VI who headed the French Aquarian Age Bonapartist Party) in order to destroy the world and prevent the Great Reset.

Judging how repulsively ugly and creepy looking the “woke” women of America look who support the Great Reset, Zeus figured that it would be better to end the world now rather than be presented with a world that would surely kill his massive sexual appetite.


The Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis approves of Zeus’ decision to release the Kraken.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday November 20th
2020.

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A Time of Madness

July 25, 2020 at 10:17 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , )

Saint Anthony the Great once said,
“A time is coming when men will go mad,
and when they see someone who is not mad,
they will attack him, saying,
you are mad;
you are not like us.”

A woman not wearing a mask in a grocery store
was set upon and beaten by 5 other women (wearing masks)
because she was not wearing a mask.
Of course if these self-righteous bitches
had bothered to ask
It was because she had an underlying medical condition
and a certificate from her doctor
saying she was unable to wear a mask.

But these are not normal times
“Insanity” and “madness” is the new normal
Christ said, “Fear not those who can kill the body
but those who can kill the soul”
A virus can kill the body
but it is madness that can kill the soul.

And in these times, most people show
they prefer madness.


In The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London,
the Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis reminded
Dracul Van Helsing, Dashwood Forrest and Renfield R. Renfield:

“Those whom the gods would destroy, they first make mad.”

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday July 25th
2020.

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Atargatis In Alexandria

June 27, 2020 at 10:28 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

In the courtyard of the Royal Alexandria Hotel
she sat
the Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis
on a late June evening in 1939

Although the sands of time
In various hourglasses
kept turning over
This way and that

The Egyptian god Thoth passed by
holding keys of Time
She saw a man named Quentin Talbot
encounter Thessalonike of Macedon
The half-sister of Alexander the Great
a couple of nights ago in the hotel ballroom

Then the scene shifted to a beach at Dunwich in Suffolk
where Thessalonike was about to sacrifice Quentin
to the old Celtic gods
on a June evening in 2020.

Dracul Van Helsing arrived to save Quentin
from being sacrificed
The next thing Atargatis knew
was she saw Van Helsing
making out with her own daughter Semiramis
In the upper bedroom
Of a Dunwich pub and inn.

Seated in an armchair and holding a spectral glass of spectral red wine
And watching the mortal-immortal sexual encounter on the bed
Was the ghost of Orson Welles
Who said,
Being a peep and watching this makes me feel like King Leer
A voyeur of some importance.

The scene vanished again
And she saw Adolf Hitler encountering Josef Stalin
In an Egyptian tomb
that had been transferred to the dungeon of Castle Dracula
in Transylvania

Hitler and Stalin were playing a chess game
For controlling America in the year 2020
The young Chinese Communist revolutionary Mao Tse-tung
dropped by
And told Hitler to use his white knight to crush a black pawn

Der Fuhrer like all racists
thought all Asians looked the same
And mistaking Mao for one of his Japanese allies
followed the future Chairman Mao’s advice

Stalin moved in for the kill
As Mao applauded
General Robert E. Lee’s battle flag of Northern Virginia
went up in flames across a map of the American south
Followed by the Stars and Stripes going up in flames
Across a map of the entire United States of America
Soon to be replaced by the Hammer and Sickle.

Atargatis leaned back on her chaise lounge as the combined scorpion and Phoenix fan above her kept her cool

A shadow fell across her.
She opened her eyes.
“Van Helsing, I presume?”
She said to the man standing alongside the chaise lounge.

Orson Welles’ ghost found himself in the Royal Alexandria Hotel courtyard
“Once again, I’m a witness… I’m a witness…”
He rang the bell alongside his chaise lounge
to summon the hotel porter to bring him a glass of red wine.

-A narrative poem
and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday June 27th
2020.

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Renfield Discusses Bozos Heading Amnesty Canada International, The Coming Middle East War and Drones Hitting Saudi Refinery

September 14, 2019 at 11:10 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Politics, Romance, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Renfield Discusses Bozos Heading Amnesty International Canada, The Coming Middle East War and Drones Hitting Saudi Refinery

“I am NOT an impotent bed wetter with a small penis.”
-Alex Neve, Secretary-General of Amnesty International Canada snivelling in response to the latest political volley shot at him by Alberta Premier Jason Kenney

When asked by the news media to drop his trousers and his drawers in order to provide substantial empirical proof to back up his denial, Mr. Neve declined to do so.

Meanwhile over in London England, British Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn stood up and left a pub when he saw the Egyptian god Anubis enter.

Meanwhile in another corner of the pub, British MP Renfield R. Renfield and his friend Amadeus Emanon were discussing the world geopolitical situation.

“So, what’s this war of words going on in Canada between Alex Neve the Secretary-General of Amnesty International Canada and Alberta Premier Jason Kenny?” Amadeus asked as he ordered the Alberta Angus steak sandwich medium rare.

“Well Alex Neve being your typical Marxist-Leninist inclined climate change obsessed radical environmentalist nut case thinks that building pipelines and putting people in Alberta’s oil and gas industry back to work is a gross violation of human rights,” Renfield replied.

“That’s kind of a different claim to make,” Amadeus sipped his tea.

“It’s not how Lenin, Josef Stalin, Mao Tse-tung and the current House of Saud’s idea of violating human rights would work but then Canada is a country that recently legalized marijuana,” Renfield pointed out.

“What can I get you for dinner, sir?” The waitress asked Renfield.

“The two piece cod Fish and Chips, please,” Renfield handed her back the menu.

“So, what do you think of the possibility of a major regional war breaking out in the Middle East sometime in the foreseeable future?” Amadeus asked.

“Well, it’s always possible that a major Middle East regional war won’t break out this year although even that possibility is becoming more and more unlikely,” Renfield said, “however in the longer term, saying that a Middle East regional war will NOT break out in the next few years makes about as much sense as saying that someday a member of America’s contemporary so-called progressive/liberal left will actually come to understand what Marxist-Leninism and Fascism actually are in their historical antecedents rather than in the pseudointellectual dream world that most American progressives and liberals seem to exist in.”

“Wow, then that definitely does not look good for world peace,” Amadeus admitted.

“And it may not look good for world peace in the very very immediate future if Benjamin Netanyahu’s Likud Party continues to do poorly in the polls in the next few days leading up to the Israeli general Election,” said Renfield, “Netanyahu is the sort of political personality that would prefer World War III breaking out rather than the absolutely horrific (in his opinion) possibility that he might cease being Prime Minister of Israel. Even saying he’d annex the Jordan Valley and the northern Dead Sea area didn’t give Netanyahu the boost in the polls that he desires. So obviously he may have to resort to the last resort of starting a war with Iran in order to save his political skin.”

“I see someone launched a drone attack on the oil refinery at the Abqaiq facility and the Khurais oil field run by Saudi Aramco in Saudi Arabia early this morning,” Amadeus noted, “The closure will impact 5 million barrels of crude oil processing per day which is half of Saudi crude oil production and 5 percent of the world’s daily oil production. We may soon see $100 per barrel oil.”

“That’s right,” Renfield nodded, “The Houthi rebels of Yemen are claiming responsibility for the drone attacks while others are saying that it’s Iran itself behind the attacks. U.S. Secretary of State Mike Pompeo who seems to have replaced John Bolton as the war hawk in the Trump Administration is now making the claim that it’s Iran itself which is behind the attacks.”

Meanwhile in that other corner of the pub, Anubis the Egyptian jackal headed god was reading a copy of the Last Will and Testament of Czar Nicholas II of Russia that was given to him by Virgil the longest serving librarian at the Bodleian Library at Oxford.

Meanwhile the Syro-Phoenician mermaid goddess Atargatis had shape shifted into human form and had traveled back in time and was now a Russian countess at her palatial manor in Saint Petersburg on the eve of the Bolshevik Revolution.

She stood at the window of the manor alongside her dog.

The Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing (who had likewise traveled back in time) approached her.

“Do you know where Apophis is?” Van Helsing asked Atargatis.

“On the battleship Aurora,” the goddess answered.

“That’s what I thought,” said Van Helsing.

Apophis was the Great Serpent in ancient Egyptian religion and the ancient Egyptian god of chaos and destruction.

-A vampire novel chapterĀ 
written by Christopher
Saturday September 14th
2019.

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Atargatis, Dracul and The A. Y. Jackson Painting

March 29, 2019 at 10:18 pm (Art, Arts, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, love, Romance, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

The year was 1955.

Winston Churchill had recently stepped down as Prime Minister of Britain.

And an exhibit of paintings of Canadian artist A. Y. Jackson was opening in London.

The Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis had gone back in time from the current year of 2019 to 1955 to purchase an A.Y. Jackson painting that would become quite valuable.

Atargatis at a London art exhibit in the spring of 1955.

The name of the painting was Painting Of A Buffalo From The Rearend As Painted From The Rearend of A Train.

The buffalo had been painted by Jackson while he was sitting at the back of a caboose at a train stopped in the Red Deer River Badlands near Drumheller, Alberta, Canada.

A buffalo had stoppped and turned around and showed Jackson his rearend so the artist had painted a picture of the spectacle.

“A most remarkable portrait of the late Fuhrer of Germany,” Sir Winston Churchill remarked as he gazed at the painting through his spectacles.

Atargatis controlled a laugh.

Then she caught sight of Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing.

“Are you here to bid on the painting, Van Helsing?” She asked.

“No, just here to take a look,” Van Helsing replied, “my dad often talked about this painting. That very same buffalo later went and took a crap on the shoes of my dad’s school principal. My dad always wanted to say thanks to that buffalo but never got around to it. So I’m here to do it on his behalf.”

“You’re an unusual man, Van Helsing,” Atargatis took a martini off a passing tray.

“And you’re a ravishingly beautiful goddess,” Van Helsing likewise grabbed a martini.

“We really should stop meeting like this,” Atargatis smiled, “it gives a whole new meaning to that expression “blast from the past”. Although I must say, I wouldn’t mind doing it in a DeLorean.”

“Neither would I,” Van Helsing smiled in return, “seeing as how time traveling DeLorean drivers were right in their prognostications about who would become U.S. President in a certain time period- be it Reagan or be it Trump- I’m sure the DeLorean back seat windows could use a little steaming up.”

“Did the DeLorean have a back seat?” Atargatis asked.

“If it didn’t, we could always make one,” the vampire hunter helped himself to a raw oyster.

“I hear a couple of nights ago, you were in Havana, Cuba in 1956,” Atargatis helped herself to a Cuban cigar.

“I was,” Van Helsing offered her a light, “where I heard from a Los Angeles private eye that drinking milk from your lactating breasts makes one immortal.”

“And would you like to be immortal, Mr. Van Helsing?” She approached him.

“England expects every man to do his duty,” Dracul quoted Lord Horatio Nelson and looked down the front of her dress.

The remaining drops of the Syro-Phoenician goddess’ martini wound up in the vampire hunter’s face.

Atargatis walked outside.

After grabbing a towel from the waiter and wiping his face, Van Helsing followed her.

“Well, how about this for a coincidence?” Dracul Van Helsing quoted a line that Dustin Hoffman spoke to Katharine Ross at the back of a bus and pointed towards a car parked in front of the art gallery steps, “A DeLorean.”

Atargatis looked at the car and smiled.

She turned to Van Helsing with a twinkle in her eye and said, “Well, a girl really can’t say no to a DeLorean can she?”.

“They shall look back and say, this was their finest hour,” Churchill quipped as he exited the art gallery.

“And will I get the chance to play with your gearshift, Mr. Van Helsing?” Atargatis asked as the vampire hunter opened the door for her.

“I was hoping you’d ask,” was the vampire hunter’s reply.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday March 29th
2019.

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