Amadeus Meets Serena Williams

July 14, 2015 at 7:35 pm (News, Sports, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Amadeus Meets Serena Williams

Amadeus Emanon and Renfield R. Renfield were sitting in the lobby of an elegant 5-star London hotel.

Both men were wearing tuxedos and bow ties.

“So, what are we doing here?” Amadeus asked Renfield.

“Well,” Renfield mused, “it’s been a while since I’ve banged a celebrity. Do you remember years ago, I banged all 3 Kardashian sisters underneath a table in a McDonald’s in downtown Manhattan?.”

“Yes, I remember you got mad at me for eating your Filet o’ Fish and French fries while you were busy doing that,” Amadeus recalled.

“Anyways,” Renfield quickly returned to the subject at hand, “I’ve got a hankering to bang a celebrity again. And since this is the hotel where many celebrities seem to stay when they’re in London, I figure this is the best place to meet one.”

“And what am I supposed to do while you’re banging a celebrity? Amadeus asked.

“Well, I hear they serve an excellent tea and crumpets in the tea room here,” Renfield suggested.

“Whereabouts is the tea room?” Amadeus looked around.

“Oh, my gosh, I think that’s actress Gong Li,” Renfield noticed a beautiful woman wearing a green evening dress walk into the lobby.

He quickly followed her into the elevator and flashed Amadeus a V for victory sign as the elevator door closed.

Amadeus decided to head off to see if he could locate the tea room on his own.

As he walked down the hall, he suddenly noticed a beautiful woman wearing a white evening gown.

He recognized her as Serena Williams.

“Congratulations Miss Williams,” Amadeus bowed as she walked by, “on winning your sixth Wimbledon title and your 21st Grand Slam title.”

“Well,” Serena smiled, “aren’t you the perfect gentleman. And what’s your name, my good man?”.

“Amadeus Emanon,” he bowed again.

“Is that French?” Serena asked.

“Emanon is French,” Amadeus replied, “Amadeus is Latin.”

“I see, Mr. Amadeus Emanon,” Serena smiled again, “and what do you do for a living?”.

“I’m a concert pianist,” Amadeus answered.

“I see,” Serena was quite taken with the shy, quiet, unassuming gentleman,”how would you like to come up to my room and we can make music together?”.

“Do you have a piano in your room?” Amadeus asked.

Serena laughed, “Oh no. But we can find other ways to make music.”

“Well,” Amadeus reflected, “I’ve only recently begun learning how to play both the harp and the piccolo.”

Serena took hold of his hand and led him into the elevator with her.

. . .

Renfield sat in the lobby of the hotel sporting one huge black eye and wondered where the Hell Amadeus had gotten to.

He wasn’t in the tea room having tea and crumpets like he was supposed to be doing.

Renfield rubbed his black eye and wondered whether the hotel kitchen might not have some frozen steaks he could put on it.

His encounter with Gong Li had not been successful.

He had discovered that Gong Li’s martial arts skills weren’t just acting.

It was a good thing for Renfield that he had recently learned the words to the Chinese National Anthem in both Mandarin and Cantonese.

Otherwise his nuts might have been totally crushed beyond all hope of repair.

Amadeus came out of one of the hotel elevators with a huge smile on his face.

Renfield stood up to greet him.

“Where have you been?” Renfield demanded to know.

“I’ve been learning a new form of music,” Amadeus smiled, “one I’ve never experienced before.”

“Is that lipstick on your collar?” Renfield asked.

“Why yes, I guess it is,” Amadeus looked down.

“Say that woman who got out of the elevator with you,” Renfield pointed in the direction of a woman in a white evening gown going through the hotel’s revolving door, “wasn’t that Serena Williams?”.

“Yes, it was,” Amadeus sighed.

“She looked positively glowing,” Renfield remarked, “she must still be really happy over her sixth Wimbledon win.”

“She might also have other things to glow about as well,” Amadeus remarked whose own face was glowing about as red as Michelangelo the psychic lobster when he had undergone an extra dose of radiation down at the Set Enterprises lab.

Renfield looked at Amadeus’ glowing face and then looked at Serena Williams’ glowing face as she entered a taxi.

“Oh, my God,” Renfield sat back on the hotel lobby sofa in a total state of shock.

Amadeus just smiled.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday July 14th

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